Me and Jing Xueyao

At that time, Jing Xueyao still had time to sketch.

145.

Some classmates went to Suzhou Gardens and Shanghai to play during the vacation. I don’t like socializing and going out very much, so I go to the library to read when I wake up.Jing Xueyao's bed was under the air conditioner, and the hot-blooded young man was greedy for cold, so he caught a cold.My throat is sore and my nose is stuffy, and my voice is sticky, like the malt candy I ate when I was a child.The red nose is more pitiful than a fairy being bullied by hooligans, and other boys are dumbfounded compared to him.

146.

Concerned about it, I bought ginger and prepared to make ginger soup, only to realize that the dormitory has no pot, not only no pot, but even a kettle.I had no choice but to diverge my thinking, cut ginger into thin slices with a knife, and soaked it in water for him to drink.Jing Xueyao frowns, talking about a bag of cold medicine, why are you so wasting people and money?I think you want to poison me to death!But he still took two sips to save face.

147.

It was another afternoon of struggling to wake up from the ghost bed. I was on the night shift today, and Zhang Chao was playing "Wedding Dress" while eating wontons. I deeply suspected that the ghost bed was disturbed by this song every day.I don’t know if it’s because of the good Fengshui in the south. After I came here, I grew taller quickly. Zhang Chao also said that it’s strange that the twitches are visible to the naked eye.Mosquitoes in Suzhou are poisonous, and the bites will become red, swollen and pus-filled.Mosquito coils and mosquito repellent did not work on them. The more I scratched, the more itchy and scratched, and finally a scab formed and a scar formed.Xiao Fan thought I had burnt a cigarette scar on my arm... It's really flattering me.

148.

My birthday was one month later than Jing Xueyao, Zhang Chao took out his meal card and said he would treat me to the cafeteria.Everyone has no money, and this kind of intention is enough.Jing Xueyao didn't know where he heard about it, and bought me a small cake to celebrate.To be honest, since I was a child, I have never had a birthday, and maybe this time is my only experience of being a protagonist.Surrounded by them, I closed my eyes and made a wish with a sense of ritual, and then blew out the candles in one breath.

——I hope that he will be free from illness and disaster in his life, and that his wishes will come true.Do not suffer any suffering and suffering.

☆、Chapter 11

149.

I can't count the number of times I woke up from the nightmare, and I haven't been in a good mood recently.The dreams are full of dead sick sheep and panting cubs with red spots all over their bodies. I have to step on their carcasses to cross the river, as creepy as stepping on a pile of cream cakes.I also dreamed of our principal, with two swollen bags under her eyes hanging on her dark face, and she sprayed the air purifier with her thumb, and Zhang Chao and I were wiped out by her like two flies.

150.

We wore uniform blue overalls and stood outside the workshop for a meeting.The squad leader's lectures were stinky and long. Everyone was sweating profusely, and they felt impatient and had to erect their spines.Jing Xueyao stood within easy reach of me, with the scent of sweaty soap coming from her body.He hasn't worn earrings for a long time, and the needle-like holes in his ears have grown solid.

151.

The bright light overhead made my eyes hurt, and we were doing repetitive tasks like robots.Xiao Fan said that after a long time in the assembly line, his brain will rust, his thinking ability will gradually become rigid, his memory will decline, and he will lose his ability to deal with society.I don't think so. Everyone has their own way of life. Everyone is working hard and earnestly living, but in different ways. Otherwise, who should do these jobs?It may also be that some people just like to do nothing and don't want to live seriously; it may be that they can only live like this, why should they judge other people's occupations?The air circulation in the workshop is not very good, and everyone's face is oily all day long.Jing Xueyao on the opposite side doesn't have this trouble, he is damn pleasing to the eye in any environment.

152.

Apart from the Internet cafe, the library, and the hot dogs in the supermarket, the factory can't bring me any comfort.Jing Xueyao sat next to me and watched "Kafka on the Shore", and wrote "You must become the most tenacious 15-year-old boy in the world" on the waist of the book.There are many people in the library, and we are very close. He is wearing a wide blue vest, the muscles on his arms are faintly visible, and I can clearly see the small brown mole on his collarbone.The afterglow of the setting sun sprinkled on the camphor tree outside the window, he whispered in front of my ear, and the hot breath from his breath wet my ears.

153.

"It seems that people are prone to sexual impulses to relatives who are related by blood. Oedipus complex? Irresistible attraction."

"Almost, but Freud classified the Oedipus complex as the Oedipus complex, which is not accurate. The tragedy of Oedipus is not because of the Oedipus, but because he was abandoned by his father when he was a child... Listen Is there genetic sexual attraction? People who are related by blood have never met, or don’t know each other’s existence, and when they meet again after sexual maturity, the same genetic gene will prompt a single person or both parties to have an instinctive sexual attraction.”

154.

Jing Xueyao is obviously close at hand, and obviously looks dazzling, but I always think of the scene when I saw him for the first time.He squatted on the road in embarrassment and misery, and the rain soaked his hair and clothes.I walked over and divided the umbrella into half for him. He was like a cub licking his wound alone. The tears in the corners of his eyes were still wet, and he looked at me with vigilance and scrutiny.I don't know who made him so sad, he was not yet 13 years old, and he was wearing a white printed T-shirt with a giant Doraemon on it.He hesitated for a long time, and finally stretched out his hand towards me.There were thunderstorms, and the dark clouds rolled over and covered my eyes and ears, so I couldn't hear the sound of rain.

155.

Li Yanru occasionally called me long-distance roaming, saying that her parents were really done with this time, and explaining that she had such a good relationship when she was a child, why did she get divorced.I know she looks heartless, but this must have made her very sad.I didn't know how to comfort her, so I had to make up some embarrassing stories about Jing Xueyao to her, hoping that she could gain short-term happiness.

156.

Zhang Chao enjoyed eating the spicy strips. I snorted a large bowl of cold noodles, which were just packed and bigger than my face. They were hot and sour and very refreshing, but it was a pity that no sesame sauce was added.I squatted on the ground to eat like I was a child, which is very delicious.I also drank the sour plum soup to the last drop, and after eating a mouthful of garlic, my mouth was numb and swollen.The night shift went by so quickly, it seemed like there were only three days a week.When I returned to the dormitory, I was dizzy, my brain was swollen, my muscles were weak, I was immersed in self-doubt every day, and the night shift was like drinking/drugs.The morning shift is not good either. I feel refreshed every day, and I have more things to think about, and the work becomes particularly difficult. I intuitively feel the desolation day after day.

157.

Jing Xueyao was absent from the night shift, and I knocked on the door for a long time but no one answered.Turning around, I found him behind me. It turned out that he had gone to the bathroom.I breathed a sigh of relief, his bare upper body had the embryonic form of a man, but his eyes were red, and I saw that little boy crying alone again in a daze.I wiped off the sweat from my brow and followed him step by step, my intuition told me that I must not leave now.

158.

"I'm leaving." His voice was hoarse, and he stuffed the clothes and painting utensils into the suitcase.

"..." I was at a loss.

"I'm leaving here."

He's overwhelmed me, and I know the most important thing now is to keep him.I don't expect him to confide or be honest with me, I just hope that he will stop showing the expression of being abandoned by the whole world.

"Take me away too." I heard my own hoarse voice.

☆, end

159.

We hailed a taxi, and Jing Xueyao said that the farther we drove, the better.The driver was a middle-aged man who looked like the host of CCTV's legal program. He hadn't stopped talking since we got in the car, and asked us if we ran away from home?Will ask if we are brothers?More chatty than our principal.Jing Xueyao couldn't bear it anymore and took out several hundred-yuan bills, "I want to be quiet."

160.

I looked anxiously at the passing scenery outside the window. This was not a trip, not a wandering, but an unplanned escape.The person I like and I will face each other day and night for countless days in the future. What is worse than elopement?We are grasshoppers on the same rope, comrades fighting side by side, sharing weal and woe, and I am deeply excited about this.The rebelliousness, depression, and years of negative emotions in my heart, as well as the intensified delusions, all found an outlet to vent.

161.

When it was dark, the car stopped in Wuzhen, and Jing Xueyao presciently carried several ID cards.At that time, the inspection was not strict, and we easily lived in a B&B facing the street. We could see the night view of Xizha and the rowing boats floating on the Denghe River through the window.Many people came and went on the covered bridge with lanterns. We were like a boat with two leaves attached to each other, submerged by the violent wind and waves, and lost in the rolling red dust.

162.

It was hot and none of us were in the mood for sightseeing.Day and night, like two fugitives who committed a felony.When the lights dimmed in the evening, it was like two night owls wandering aimlessly along the stone bridge of Xishi River and the lights reflected on the water surface in this Wuwa white-walled water town.We wore old-fashioned shirts we had just bought and sandals that cost ten yuan a pair, sat on benches and ate ice cubes, and watched outdoor movies one after another under the stars.

163.

The TV signal in the homestay is not good, and there are very few stations that can be received.As the sun set, the gorgeous sunset cast a poetic filter on the room. I fell asleep with the urge to urinate, and the sound of Commander Lu beating Yiping with a whip came from my ears.

"This dad is really nothing..." Accompanied by the endless singing of cicadas in the garden, Jing Xueyao was filled with righteous indignation while nibbling melon seeds, "If I were Yiping, I would go and seduce Erhao. What about the Lu family's retribution?"

164.

It was raining, and when I opened my eyes, Jing Xueyao had just returned from South Lake, and the sound of the key opening the door woke me up.He put away his painting tools and went to the bathroom. The white shirt that was thrown on the floor had a faint smell of turpentine, and the colorful paints had dried up badly on it.Through the white shadowy mosquito net, I saw Jing Xueyao walking out with a bath towel around his waist. His chest was white and delicate, his legs were straight and slender, and the sun-baked parts of his neck and cheeks showed a little sweetness. honey color.We are still in the voice change period, and the hair on our bodies is not as strong as that of adults.He quickly changed into beach shorts, saw me sleepy on the bed, scratched my chin with his index finger like a dog, and said condescendingly: "You can sleep like this, are you a pig?"

165.

We went to Fengyuan Restaurant for a meal. Maybe our expectations were too high. The mutton and white water fish are not as good as Aniu’s steamed pork.Jing Xueyao tore off the fruit logo and pasted it on my hand, and said mysteriously that it was the totem of the orc tribe. When the moon was full, I cut my finger and dripped blood on it, so that we could open the door of darkness and start anew. Return to Orgrimmar.

166.

Jing Xueyao wanted to eat sauced duck and shredded radish pancakes when he came out of the art gallery, but he hated stinky tofu and other soy foods.I am not picky at all, and I also eat wild vegetable and bean dip with relish.Misty and rainy, we strolled on the bluestone road in Xizha, through the old streets and narrow alleys, each holding a pot of three liquors in his hand, no one wanted to talk, we indulged each other, and drank while walking in the hazy night .A girl holding a flowered paper umbrella passed us by, homesick folk songs came from bars along the way, and Jing Xueyao retched while leaning on the railing on the bridge.I walked in and saw that he was flushed and had lots of rashes on his neck and arms.

"Don't you know that you are allergic to alcohol?"

"……forget."

I bought him medicine and put him to sleep like a baby.The sick Jing Xueyao was extremely clingy. We lay neck to neck in the middle of the night. He nestled in my arms as if he had no bones, his legs were also on my thighs, and he hugged my waist without letting go. Said that I have a smell that he likes on me.

167.

"I should have an older brother or younger brother, about my age, who was born to my father and another woman..." His fingernails were a little long, and it hurt the soft flesh on my waist.I have always been clumsy in speech and tongue, and I didn't know how to comfort him, let alone solve his problems, so I had to reach out and wipe away the tears from the corners of his eyes. "My mother works in Japan, and the two of them get together less and leave more, and the marriage has long existed in name only."

168.

"Are you sad because of this?"

"No." Jing Xueyao took my hand that was wiping away his tears, and plucked my curly hair, "It's because my mother told me openly and honestly that they were divorced, she didn't hide anything, she wouldn't even lie to me. She revealed this cruel reality to me so easily, is it because my emotions are worthless in her eyes? Maybe in her eyes, I am already a minor who can bear pain. "

169.

Gradually we were stretched thin, and we could only live on fat cakes and sesame cakes every day.Jing Xueyao wanted to leave again, but the beauty and food here couldn't keep him.

"You really think of this as a trip? We have no money in our pockets, and now we need to find a job..."

"Let's go back." I confirmed his meaning again and again, and learned that he had already asked for leave for us when he left.

"If I ran away irresponsibly, I would have been in trouble over there. I don't want to be knocked on the door by the police uncle."

170.

I should have laughed, but I couldn't. His responsibility and foresight kept me in the dark, and I went to the hell to ask about the salary of that game hall.He kept his mouth shut and made me think it was a two-person adventure, but it turned out to be just me fighting alone.Tears were rolling in my eyes, what a complete idiot I am, he was not my accomplice from the beginning to the end.I pretended to be calm and hid in the bathroom, trying to cry with the sound of water, only to find that I was exhausted physically and mentally, and the tears had already flowed down unconsciously.I was inadvertently betrayed in his innocence, and all "escape" and "elopement" were my whims and wishful thinking.I cover my hot, sore eyes, he's as badass as ever.

171.

On September 2009, 9, Sodagreen released its sixth album. There is a song I like very much called "Cicada Thinking". It was the last summer when I saw Jing Xueyao.Li Yanru said that he was going to Tokyo in junior high school, but because his grandfather passed away, he delayed until high school.Cameras were installed in our classrooms and corridors, and Lao An stared at us in class in front of the computer screen in the office.The fitter teacher was replaced by an old man who smiled all day like Maitreya Buddha and often took us to practice operations.At that time, we had to divide into welding majors. We told the fitter teacher to choose a welder, and told the welder teacher to learn to be a fitter. We sat downstairs with nothing to do and basked in the sun all day long, without handing in two manual and written assignments.

172.

My mom's florist business is booming, and I don't even want to see her when I'm on vacation.Grandma was sewing clothes on the kang with reading glasses on, my cousin was watching "Wulin Biography" with his legs crossed, and grandpa went to the field to dig sweet potatoes.My cousin is very busy with work. I ran into her at a fast food restaurant in the county that day. A balding middle-aged man sat across from me, wearing a Rolex.People in our place get married relatively early, and my uncle has arranged many blind dates for her, but she is not very satisfied.

173.

The school uniforms of Japanese men's high schools are not good-looking, like gray and plain Chinese tunic suits.Jing Xueyao often posts some photos on social software. Sure enough, the real handsome guys dare to face the camera. Whether they are crying or laughing, whether they are poor or rich, every angle is pleasing.I heard that their school ethos is open and encourages students to develop their individuality and get in touch with multiculturalism.Jing Xueyao is like a fish in water over there. He changes his hairstyle frequently, and often dyes his hair. Recently, the bright and fiery golden color is very similar to Sanji in Pirates, but he said it was a campus festival to cosplay Naruto.

174.

I don't think of him often, and I rarely even dream of him.The cherry blossoms in Japan are blooming, Jing Xueyao joined the photography club, and there are many landscape photos and selfies in the album.He didn't change in appearance, just taller again.I think of a long time ago, we were lying on the soft lawn in the sun, and he asked me what I would do in the future with his arm resting on his pillow.Surrounded by noisy people and birds chirping, we became two quiet cherry blossoms, suspended at the age of 16.

175.

His smile was warm and bright that day, brushing my heart like a feather, the beauty is not real.It doesn't matter if he talks or not; it doesn't matter whether he laughs or not.He made me satisfied and insatiable, lovely and distressed.Love makes people dazzled and makes people light.I want to write one hundred and one thousand love letters to him, fold them into boats not worthy of him, and float them one by one along the small river in front of my house to Tokyo.