memory castration

"It's too low, I can't hear you."

"Fuckme!"

"That's it, tell it a hundred times, don't stop... what are you watching? Can't you be emotional?" It turns out that you can never expect a pervert to have any bottom line.

I said 'Fuckme' on my lips and thought about fucking your mother.

Xu Yifei stared at me sullenly, and said in a flirtatious tone: "You and Xiao Ziqi are in bed, are you also so promiscuous?"

The attitudes of the two of them towards their bed partners are like heaven and earth, it is hard not to make me miss Xiao Ziqi's tenderness that day.

Seeing my silence, he got even more angry, and without any foreplay, he opened my buttocks and squeezed two fingers in.

This is simply murder!All I could do was bury my face in the bed sheet and pray in my heart that this damn torture would end soon.

He patted my butt with his hands, "Spread your legs, don't act like a rape, don't you always want to be fucked hard?"

"No... yes." I weakly defended, and I couldn't help but seep a cold sweat on my forehead.

"If you don't, you're still so coquettish. If you do, do you want all the men in Jiangcheng to fuck you all over?"

"Xu Yifei..."

He grabbed my hair and slammed into it, "Don't fucking call me by my name, you don't deserve it!"

Oh, I almost forgot, I always call him Mr. Xu, isn't it ridiculous to call him Mr. Xu to my lover who has been living together for seven years?

Also, he is not my lover, but a man labeled as a fiance by a woman.

I don't understand more and more the meaning of my cooperation in doing this kind of thing. I loved him in the past, so I can sacrifice everything.

But now, I have decided not to love him anymore, and my memory can't help me to remember him, why do I have to do such a thing?

Xu Yifei's sexual needs have always been strong. After he finished venting, I have been wandering for a long time.

He pushed me away, fumbled for a cigarette in the drawer, lit it, his handsome face was looming in the white mist.

The sheets were messy and blood-stained, comparable to a slaughter scene, and my embarrassment was simply to set off his existence.

Struggling to sit up, I pulled the blanket around me.

He looked at me silently, with a hint of confusion in his sharp eyes.

"Mr. Xu, I want to talk to you."

He lazily puffed out smoke rings, "Say."

"let's break up."

He froze for a moment, the shock on his face was fleeting, and he said in a deep voice, "What did you say?"

"I'm not too young now, and because of my health, I want to plan for myself in the future."

Maybe it was because he just finished venting, he didn't feel as irritable as before, but looked at me contemptuously, "What's your plan? Switch to Xiao Ziqi's embrace? What did he promise you? Money? A house? Or Car? Don’t I give you enough of these?”

I said nervously, "I can give them all back to you."

Xu Yifei pressed the cigar into the ashtray, and said leisurely: "Xiao Ziqi is so good that he can make you spit out what you have already obtained?"

"No, no, Mr. Xu..."

He interrupted me with raised eyes, "Didn't you say we broke up, what are you still doing here? Didn't you have a good time just now?"

ah?The result seemed to be much smoother than expected. I climbed to the side of the bed and bent down to pick up the clothes on the floor.

"The clothes should be bought with my money."

"Ah... yes." I retracted my hand in embarrassment, looking at him at a loss.

"Since we said we're breaking up, you shouldn't be taking my things with you." He looked at me with a hint of sarcasm at the corner of his mouth, "Back then when you walked into our Xu's house naked, you should walk out naked now. You did it once. It shouldn't be too difficult for you."

Although I can't remember what he said, Xu Yifei never bothers to tell lies, so he must be telling the truth.

What he said was right, why bother with doing something once?Sooner or later it will be forgotten anyway.

Once you walk out of this house, you will be completely free. From now on, the sky will be as high as the birds, and the water will be as wide as the fishes... You will not be inferior to others, and you will no longer be looked down upon.

Hesitating to tear off the blanket, I put the soles of my feet on the cold ground.

One step, two steps, three steps...

Just when I was about to touch the metal door handle, the ashtray behind me suddenly rushed towards me, "Fang Yibai, if you dare to walk out of this door today, I will ask Xiao Ziqi to collect your body tonight."

In the end, I still couldn't go away. It turns out that I have been with him for seven years, and I still can't fully understand his heart.

If he loved me, he wouldn't have countless bed partners, and even ran to get married.

If he doesn't love me, why should he spend money to support me? Isn't this just looking for anger for himself?

Sitting in the garden in the morning and soaking up the sun, I touched the thick gauze on my head and thought, if this continues, I probably won’t live to the day when I will completely lose my memory.

Xu Yifei walked out of the room angrily, "Where's the photo?"

Seeing my puzzled expression, he took my arm and dragged him into the bedroom, pointing to the photo frame on the table and asking me, "Where are the previous photos here?"

This question... I have to think about it, it seems that I burned him yesterday, but seeing his ferocious appearance, I can't admit it even if I beat him to death.

Trying to put on an innocent face, "How do I know?"

"How dare you pretend to be me?" He slammed the photo frame to the ground, "You and I are the only ones who have entered this room these two days!"

"I really……"

"Believe it or not I'll punch another hole in your head?"

I trembled, and said truthfully: "Burn... burn."

He widened his red eyes and shouted, "Fang Yibai! Who will allow you to touch my things?"

I hurriedly hugged my head, "I thought I was too ugly on the top, so I wanted to put a good-looking one on it. But after looking around, I couldn't find a group photo, so..."

He raised his hand, and when he was about to hit me in the face, he stopped, "Final warning, if you dare to touch my things without authorization, your hand will be cut off."

After he left, I let out a long sigh of relief, I can't live this day.

It's just an ordinary group photo, so there's no need to make such a fuss?I'm afraid he's making excuses again, right?

In the future, if I am too forgetful and do something wrong again, he will really kill me, right?This is simply a certainty.

Locked at home in the afternoon, I cooked a bowl of pasta when I was hungry, and when I was about to finish eating, Xu Yifei came back.

I was careful not to make a sound, quickly sucked the last noodle into my mouth, ran to the kitchen to wash the dishes, and came out, the action was done in one go.

Xu Yifei was still standing at the door, his face as dark as the bottom of a pot.

Did I do something wrong again?Why does it feel like the air is cold...

After staring at each other for a long time, I was the first to speak under great pressure, "Mr. Xu...I want to go out tomorrow."

"what's up?"

"Go to the place where I lived before, and get some important things." Hurry up and take those books back, and re-read the things recorded on them from time to time, in order to deal with unexpected emergencies.

"I'll have someone go with you then."

"Oh." I felt speechless to him, "Then I'm going to sleep."

He looked at his watch in disbelief, "Are you a pig? It's only 04:30 in the afternoon!"

04:30 What happened?I am a sick person, not only my body is injured, but my brain is not functioning well, so is it wrong to take more rest?Of course, I dare not say these words in front of him anyway.

Xu Yifei stared at me for a while, and said with a look of unbearable: "Get out, get out."

At ten o'clock in the evening, I was forcibly woken up by someone around me, "Fang Yibai, are you sick? Is it really okay to sleep twenty hours a day?"

I lay on the bed wanting to cry, "Mr. Xu, don't you know if I'm sick?"

He frowned, and said something in a low voice, and I fell asleep again in a daze.

This sleep was really sweet, and I didn't wake up until someone came over the next day.

"Mr. Xu said that you have something to pick up, let me come and help you."

It sounds nice to be a helper, but it doesn’t sound like surveillance, right?I stretched and sat up from the bed, washed up and went to the rented house with him.

The door locks are all intact, but the things I want to take are missing!

"How could this be? I clearly remember that it was put in a box."

The man confirmed: "Could Mr. Fang accidentally forget it somewhere else?"

"Impossible!" I searched every corner of the room again, but I still couldn't see them.

Such a thick stack of notebooks cannot disappear without a reason. The only possibility is...they were taken away in advance!

After returning to Xu Yifei's residence, I was still thinking about this problem. The money in the house was untouched, but those notebooks were missing.Who is so bored to get these things, and there is no important secret, it's all just daily chores... a headache.

The phone rang suddenly, and I didn't intend to answer it, it just kept ringing stubbornly.

After arguing for about 10 minutes, I reluctantly walked over, "Hello?"

There was a moment of silence in the microphone, and a pleasant baritone voice said softly, "Is it Xiaobai?"