deceased into ashes

"Hi, the number you are calling is off. Sorry, the number..."

Yu Qingyue waited for the phone to hang up by herself. This was the seventh call she made today.

It has been sixteen days.

Zhou Qianyi hasn't returned home yet.

These days, she found Zhou Qianyi's stomach cancer case in the closet, which she hid very well, under her clothes.

When Yu Qingyue saw the contents of the case, she really felt that Zhou Qianyi was getting farther and farther away from her and the world.

Advanced gastric cancer, how long can it last...

It's already January, and Shanghai is still cold, with a sea of ​​people coming and going. It's almost February, and the New Year is coming, but she hasn't returned home yet.

In previous years, no matter what, Yu Qingyue would go home to spend the New Year. No matter how good Yingying and Yanyan were outside, she would still only spend the New Year with Zhou Qianyi.

At that time they were making dumplings together, Yu Qingyue was clumsy and couldn't make the dumplings well, and was always sulking at the dumpling wrappers, Zhou Qianyi would smile and take the dumplings she hadn't made, and wrap them silently.

It seems that for many years, in a life that was neither salty nor dull, Zhou Qianyi has always tolerated everything about her with the gentleness like water.

Once, she went upstream to pursue Zhou Qianyi, and they spent 12 years together.

Now that Zhou Qianyi is gone, she thought that Zhou Qianyi could pamper herself for the rest of her life, and she would not be serious about being with others...

The beginning of acceptance three years ago may have been a mistake.

It wasn't until Zhou Qianyi was away for sixteen days that Yu Qingyue remembered what she had done bit by bit.

Two years ago, Zhou Qianyi used to catch the rain in the cold March in the south, and went to her company to give her the fried rice that he made at home.

At that time, she didn't want to be hungry in the company, so she came to deliver meals like this every day.

Several times, when I wasn't in the company, I lied for a long time, leaned in my lover's arms, hung up the phone, and started talking about why she was so annoying.

In that March, Zhou Qianyi delivered half a month's worth of food, more than half of which were others who helped Yu Qingyue eat those hot dishes, and then laughed and teased her on the phone or in text messages——

With such a good family, do you still like those little brothers and sisters outside?

What did I say at the time...

correct.

She said that she has long been tired of Zhou Qianyi's daily flattery.

A few days after the middle of March, Zhou Qianyi didn't go home for a day, so Yu Qingyue took a day off. The business didn't go well that day, and she was in a bad mood, but Zhou Qianyi was still not at home.

She simply took a day off and waited at home to see what Zhou Qianyi was up to, and didn't go home for a whole day...

At that time, she wondered if Zhou Qianyi had also gone outside to find someone. After all, she was away from home a lot of the time, and the more she thought about it, the more angry she became. Suddenly, the door of the house opened.

Zhou Qianyi was coughing. At that time, she was wrapped in a scarf, her nose was red, and she was carrying a pack of medicine.

She was annoyed at the time, and hurriedly asked Zhou Qianyi what was going on.

Zhou Qianyi said that she went to the hospital.

At that time, I was also very stupid to ask Zhou Qianyi why he was going to the hospital.

It was raining during those days when I was delivering meals to her, and she was sick with a cold and a fever.

For such a simple reason, I didn't even think about it at the time, I just wondered if Zhou Qianyi also...

Zhou Qianyi took the medicine and walked into the room without saying a word. She lowered her head and put the medicine away. Seeing that she ignored her, Yu Qingyue became even more angry.

At that time, I didn't care about Zhou Qianyi's condition, but thought about——

Zhou Qianyi has learned to put on airs with her these days? !

What else was he doing at the time.

Yes.

Like a bad child, she forced/pressed/pressed Zhou Qianyi who was still sick on the bed, no matter how much Zhou Qianyi begged, saying that she was not feeling well, and if she could do it next time, she would still go her own way.

She remembered that it was the first time Zhou Qianyi cried on the bed.

Not the painful tears the first time, but the sorrow of being tortured by a lover.

She felt that it was interesting at the time.

Thinking about it now, huh.

Yu Qingyue slapped herself.

This is just a little bit she can remember, and she can't remember the rest clearly.

Every time, when I hurt Zhou Qianyi, because of the tolerance of the other party and my willfulness, all these things seemed to be taken for granted.

I'm really...disgusted...

Yu Qingyue buried her head in her knees. These days, she started to read the books Zhou Qianyi had read and sorted out their old things.

She found a lot. She found the first book written by Zhou Qianyi. At that time, she didn't take it seriously and didn't even read it. Looking back now, she realized how sad Zhou Qianyi's inner world was.

Yu Qingyue trembled, her tears fell on the book, she thought, why was no one stopped her at that time, no one told herself - you have your own lover at home, don't come out to fool around.

Why... Is it because I am too stubborn, or my heart has long been wild...

As I said before, I want to protect her for the rest of my life.

Now, he had actually beaten her.

Zhou Qianyi was not wrong, why did he treat her like this...

Yu Qingyue drank a lot these days, and the company also called to urge her to go to work these days.

But she couldn't wait for Zhou Qianyi, she didn't want to go back to work.

She still has several million in deposits in her card, and although she has distributed more or less to those Yingyingyanyans, there is still some left over.

She is one of the shareholders, and the small business she invested in can still maintain her life for one to two years for the time being.

She asked the company for annual leave and promised to work as usual after one year.

Because her ability is really outstanding, and it is true that sometimes it is impossible to start the project without her, the company has no choice but to agree.

At home, Yu Qingyue opened up the wine she liked or didn't like before, drank it bottle by bottle, then vomited up the fast food she ate, and finally vomited up the blood in her stomach.

When she and Zhou Qianyi first entered the business circle, they often accompanied them for drinks, and they vomited late at night.

At that time, she hugged Zhou Qianyi who was bleeding from the stomach, and cried that she would not let her suffer in the future when she was promising.

For nine years, it seemed that I still only loved that person, and in the next three years, I also loved it, but the love was not deep, but my heart changed.

Become fond of wandering, become disgusted with the unchanging life, and begin to pursue new stimuli.

People who have been homeless for a long time always want to go home, and Zhou Qianyi is her home.

She was rebellious since she was a child, and her mother treated her badly, beating and scolding her, because she was the child of the man who abandoned her, so she was especially disliked.

Although my stepfather didn't care much about me, he would stop some of my biological mothers, saying not to always hit Qingyue, girls would leave a shadow.

She had hated her mother's youngest daughter—the only child of her own mother and stepfather.

Her younger sister's nickname is Xixi, her parents love her, her mother never beats her, she is very gentle when she sees her, but she is so fierce to herself.

Her younger sister Xixi can't compare with her, no matter how poor she is, her grades are still decent, and she doesn't dare to spend money recklessly.

And her younger sister is living the best life, spends money arrogantly, and looks down on her elder sister many times. It is obviously the younger sister's fault, but when the mother comes, no matter what, Yu Qingyue must be the one who gets beaten.

Yu Qingyue hated this family.

At that time, she was helpless, saw Zhou Qianyi, and met her light.

Zhou Qianyi gave her the warmth of family.

They slept together, talked about their concerns, and wandered around together. Zhou Qianyi would not scold her, let alone beat her. He just listened to her whining gently, and then hugged Yu Qingyue who was like a child.

Yu Qingyue hadn't contacted her family since they finished college. Her biological mother was also very "enlightened" and canceled all the original phone numbers, happily having no contact with her at all.

Not a single greeting.

She seems to be just a task, just finish it, and don't worry about it.

Unknowingly, Zhou Qianyi became her only family member.

The only one who is willing to tolerate all of her people.

Yu Qingyue rented back the previous house again, and now this one is not for sale.

In case Qianyi wants to come back, there is a home where she can sleep peacefully, as long as she is willing to come back...

The phone on the table began to vibrate, someone called.

Yu Qingyue took the phone, looked at the caller's name, was stunned for a second in disbelief, and then quickly answered the call.

"Qianyi...is that you..."

The other party was silent for a while, but still spoke.

"it's me."