Xu Jun's life

March [-]th is the birthday of Li Zhurong's grandfather.

I hid in the bedroom all day, read a book I brought, read it over and over again, and finally stayed up until noon on March [-]th.

Although Mr. Li said that it was not a big deal, he was just talking.Eightieth birthday, full of children and grandchildren, how could it be possible not to make arrangements?Since the morning, the Li family has been very lively, with an endless stream of visitors, all of whom are famous and famous.He heard a commotion from the female guests in the small living room from a distance, and it turned out that it was Zheng Yehu who had come.

I didn't want to meet these people at all. I was able to chat and laugh with them back then because I thought they were Li Zhurong's friends.Now that my relationship with Li Zhurong is in such a mess, what capacity should I use to meet them?

Lunch was supposed to be eaten upstairs, but Li Zhurong asked Yuan Haihai to call me upstairs.Yuan Hai said in a joking tone: "Mr. Li just said that all the visitors are guests. The guests upstairs are afraid that they will look down on the members of the Li family, so they would not even come down to toast with Mr. Shou Xing."

He said this in front of people, and it was not my face, but Li Zhurong's.

After all, a day earlier, Li Zhurong had said convincingly that I was his family.Now this "family" is not even willing to celebrate his grandfather's birthday.

If Li Zhurong is unhappy, I will be the first person to suffer.

In normal times, I don't care about whether it's good or bad, anyway, life has already been lived like this, so how can I live a good life?But not now, because my dad's birthday, if he is not happy, I will be ten times worse than now.

"Tell Mr. Li that I had a cold and I was afraid of infecting the guests, so I didn't go downstairs. I was going to celebrate the old man's birthday, but I was empty-handed and didn't bring any gifts. I was embarrassed to ask for drinks. Now that the old man has spoken, I will immediately Go down and apologize to the old man..."

I also know that after Mr. Li finished that seemingly joking but heavy sentence, the people next to him must have been silent, and it took a long time for someone to divert the topic away with a joke.The atmosphere should still be tense now. Although Yuan Hai has a calm personality, he has been with Li Zhurong for so many years. If you modify my words and say them as a joke, the people next to you will definitely laugh along with them. Mr. Li can't cut Li Zhurong's face. If you cut too hard, you will laugh, so it is a joy.

These intrigues, the kung fu of turning ten turns in a sentence before uttering it, are things that people who grew up in these big families must learn.Although I don't know how to do it, after watching it for so long, I can still say a few words in the same way.

Mr. Li is sitting in the living room, next to several old people, I know them all.

The three families of Xia, Li and Zheng, Xia Zhifei's grandfather and father all died early, it was an accident, he had a hard life when he was a child.I've only heard about Xia Chen's lineage, but never seen it.In City C, I only thought Xia Chen looked familiar. I only met Xia Zhifei two or three times, so I didn't recognize Xia Chen.

The Li family likes to claim to be a scholarly family. In fact, the people who come out are more ruthless than the other. The people in their family don’t have the slightest hint of modesty, but they must be erudite. Li Zhurong was able to read the original text when he was 13 years old. Compared with the references, he was able to understand most of my papers, all of which were taught by Mr. Li's iron-blooded skills.

The Zheng family is very western-style and open-minded. Compared with others, Zheng Yehu and Lin Wei hardly suffered.Zheng Yehu's mother is very powerful, and now his mother is in charge of his family. It is really rare for a woman to be in politics and sit in such a high position.Although Zheng Yehu is usually crazy, he has a sense of ruthlessness in his bones. At that time, he thought that Lin Wei had an accident in the south and wiped out half of the city overnight, but it turned out that Lin Wei had an accident.

I don't like these families.

Probably because of my dad, since I was a child, I felt that those who waste time in power struggles and intrigues are just invisible.In a lifetime, a person has only one stomach, a little food a day is enough, only one body, one partner, and a roof tile is enough.People must have faith and dreams.If you like to travel, you can travel; if you like to start a company, you can start a company.I like to do physics, so I go to do physics, calculating this and that all day long, thinking that I don’t have enough money and people, and I’m wasting my life.

But the truth slapped me hard.

I thought I could live freely, do what I wanted to do, and be quite successful.But these "wasting life" people, they just need to say a word casually, and they can destroy me forever.

Power may not necessarily make their own lives, but it can ruin the lives of others.

Like me, a poor scholar, my mind is full of formulas and theorems.I can clearly explain the origin of the universe, see through each person's body composition, and explain the mechanics of each of their movements.But what I want to do is to wish the birthday of a person whom I don't want to have any negotiations with at all, saying that I wish the old man a long life and a hundred years of song and crane.

Mr. Li smiled kindly. Li Zhurong's cousin was next to her and brought a plate of red envelopes. Mr. Li gave one to me.Li Zhurong looked at me from behind with burning eyes.

The group of female guests in the small living room didn't know what they were talking about, and suddenly burst into laughter.

My hands are shaking.

The person in front of me, I know very well, it was his words that made me drop out of R University, let my reputation of molesting students spread, my parents were ashamed, and I had no foothold.But I can't throw the red envelope on his face, I have to take it.

The literati said lightly that death has been the only difficult thing since ancient times, but there are many things in this world that are more difficult than death.

It takes more courage to live and endure than to die.

My dad is 60 years old, thin, with white hair all over his head. My mom is 53 this year. She likes to play mahjong at Mr. Zheng's house downstairs.They only have one son, and even in the most difficult time, I never thought of dying.

But alive, so what?But he is locked up by Li Zhurong, he has many houses, I can live in one set, Beihai is good, Yuyuantan is also good...

He doesn't even have the right to say "no". He has so many threats. Parents, friends, and even myself can become the capital of being held hostage by him.

He said he liked me, but what did he do?He said he couldn't help himself ten years ago, but what did he do ten years later?

In ten years, I never thought that it would be nice if I hadn't met him.

But now, I suddenly think so.

I stayed in my bedroom all afternoon.

The sky darkened quickly, I didn't turn on the light, sat on the bed for a while, felt tired, so I lay down on the bed and fell asleep.

He woke up because he heard the voice of Li Zhurong coming in, he and Yuan Hai were talking.

"The teacher is asleep?"

"Just fell asleep." Yuan Hai opened the door for him, paused, and added: "Teacher Xu didn't eat anything last night."

Li Zhurong gave a "hmm" to show that he knew.Yuan Hai backed out, closed the door, and the room became dark again.

I heard the sound of him undoing his tie, and the suit jacket was thrown on the floor. He must have drunk a lot and fell directly on the bed.

"I need to slow down," he said to himself, and suddenly put his arm on me.

My whole body froze.

He probably didn't know that I was awake, lying on the bed, heaved a long sigh of relief, suddenly hooked my shoulders, and slowly pulled me over with a movement that is very light for a drunk person.

I closed my eyes and tried my best to pretend to be a person who was already asleep.

His mouth was suddenly touched by something cold, and it smelled like wine.

He kissed me.

"Teacher, do you know that Xia Zhifei envies me," he held my face in his hands and smiled with the lightness and smile unique to drunkenness in his voice: "I knew it, I'm smarter than him."

I know a thing or two about Xia Zhifei's lover.His name was Lu Feixia. From my impression, he was very weak. He couldn't smoke, drink, or eat spicy food. Even going out for a breather would cause accidents.But I've heard people say that he wasn't born like this. He was even a special soldier before, and he even went on missions in Vietnam.

I met Lu Feixia once.

It was in the summer afternoon of my sophomore year, when Li Zhurong and Zheng Yehu went to play a field shooting match, they passed by Xia Zhifei's house and called him by the way.There was a very beautiful young man standing on the lawn watering flowers, wearing a camouflage suit, and when he heard our voice, he turned his head in surprise, his face was so amazing that he lost his mind.

He is the most beautiful person I have ever seen.

I know why Xia Zhifei is envious of Li Zhurong.

He touched my face a few times, and lay down for a while, during which he occasionally let out a chuckle or two. I have known him for so many years, except for the time when we were together, it is rare for me to see him so happy.

Just when I thought he had fallen asleep, he suddenly stretched out his hand to support the bed and sat up slowly.

I know he's going to take a shower.

He is the most self-controlled person I have ever met in my life.

He has no cleanliness, and he is not dirty today, but he must take a bath, because he cannot tolerate people who lose self-control.He never indulges himself, no matter what happens, he always restrains himself and makes the most rational and calm choice.Whether it was the soft, comfortable bed that lured him, or something else.

He was self-controlled almost to the point of masochism.

He is such a person.

I used to feel sorry for him, but later found that he didn't need anyone's love and sympathy at all. He was more proud than anyone I met.

There was a slight sound of water coming from the bathroom. This dark bedroom was very similar to the night when Mr. Li just had a showdown with us ten years ago.

I was suddenly very tired.

He said that Xia Zhifei envied him.

But, he doesn't know, I envy Lu Feixia.