The world is cool

I can’t remember exactly how chaotic that day was. I only know that I went from the emergency room to surgery and then from surgery to internal medicine non-stop, and finally confirmed that the forehead injury was not serious. I didn’t need stitches, just put some medicine and gauze on it. The high fever has been repeated for many times and there are signs of pneumonia, so I must be hospitalized immediately.

Afterwards, the little lunatic joked that it was a bloody case caused by beating, but I just wanted to slap myself twice.If it wasn't for Huahua who suddenly kissed me and I kicked her head and smashed her head, if it wasn't for the ambulance that took us directly to the city hospital instead of the community medical service center where we had been hanging the bottle before, would the pneumonia have been discovered in time?What will Huahua become?

After that, I never left the hospital, and stayed with me in bed for three days, watching the nurse come every day to measure my temperature and blood pressure, and put on a new antibiotic bottle. All replaced by me.

Zhou Cheng said that he is not your son, you don't need to do that.

The little lunatic said that you are the way to stay in bed, if you don't know, you may think that Huahua has a terminal illness.

I know they think I'm doing this because of guilt, but to be honest, I have guilt, but more of it is worry, which is a very simple kind of worry that I can't let go of my hanging heart until I see Huahua recovering and being discharged from the hospital. Worried that as Huahua's illness recurred, it almost became an obsession. I was competing with an imaginary enemy named disease—isn't it just a matter of time-consuming, anyway, if you don't leave, I won't leave. See who can spend who.

Maybe it's because I was a good person in my previous life and accumulated some virtues, so God didn't make me wait too long. From the fourth day of Huahua's hospitalization, his temperature has completely stabilized at the normal level, and there has been no recurrence. In case, the doctor observed it for another two days, and finally announced to me happily: "Brother patient, you can go home and take a bath."

I really want to discuss with the doctor, can you see the occasion when you talk?Do you have to be in front of the patient?

The doctor left without any pressure, leaving me alone to face Huahua in embarrassment.

The sun was shining brightly outside the window, and most of the snow on the roofs of the low-rise buildings had already melted, revealing their original colors.

Huahua leaned on the hospital bed, smiling at me like the warm sunshine outside.

My mood suddenly brightened, I deliberately raised my arm to smell it, and then teased myself: "It doesn't smell very good."

Hua Huale, took the mobile phone and wrote: I will go through the discharge procedures in the afternoon.

I thought about it, and shook my head: "Tomorrow, let's observe for another night."

Huahua continued: Rong Kai said this is not a ward, but a petri dish.

My embarrassment, the god-level satirical metaphor of the little lunatic makes people unable to continue.

Huahua became happy, and the smile really came from her eyes: That's it, it's settled, and I'll be discharged from the hospital in the afternoon.I'm fine, don't worry.

"Okay," I surrendered, "Anyway, the doctor has spoken, so I'll just trust the experts."

With the goal achieved, Huahua picked up the book next to the pillow contentedly, and continued to read from the fold.

The book was brought by the little lunatic two days ago, and he said it was for Huahua to pass the time. I haven’t read it, and I don’t want to comment. I just feel the visual effect of the bold and black “You have no reason to be unsuccessful” on the cover. It's too shocking to look straight at.

With the sound of Huahua turning the pages, the ward became quiet.

I took out a copy of "Story Club" from under the messy newspapers on the table and started to study.

There is a kind of particle called calm floating in the air. It is not a pretense of pretending to be natural but tense, nor is it transparent with a smile. If you have to say it, this kind of calm is more like a natural simplicity from scratch.It seems that hospitalization is a demarcation point, and the past is counted as the past, good or bad has nothing to do with the present, no one talks about it, and no one mentions it, just like a painting that is badly done, spread a blank drawing paper We start again, and all the joys, sorrows and joys are derived from the present and the future, and have nothing to do with the previous ones.

[I don't often get sick. 】

This is the first sentence Huahua said to me after waking up on the hospital bed and knowing that she was hospitalized.Because of the infusion in one hand, he can only let me hold up the phone and type on it clumsily.

I don't know whether to cry or laugh. At the same time, looking back on the years we have known each other, it seems that he really only got sick once or twice, and they were all minor colds. He didn't even need to take medicine and drink more hot water to get over it. .Thinking of this, I had mixed feelings, so I said, well, I don’t get sick easily, but once I get sick, it will be a big deal.

Huahua smiled embarrassedly, as if he really did something sorry for me, and then wrote very seriously: So when I recover this time, I won't have to come to the hospital for another two or three years.

If the little lunatic was there at that time, he would definitely say something contemptuously, this will give you a rule, and your life is an arithmetic progression.But the little lunatic was not there, and Sister Zou was also sent away by me. There were only Huahua and I in the ward—one was unable to speak because of force majeure, and the other was unable to speak because his throat was too dry.

The little lunatic who arrived later asked Huahua what happened to the forehead injury, but Huahua didn't answer, but looked at me, so I had no choice but to make up a lie of "suddenly fainting".Because of the fact that he was hospitalized, the credibility of this white lie was greatly enhanced, and the person involved did not refute it, so the little lunatic naturally accepted this statement. How long? How can you get pneumonia even if you have a fever? You can’t speak or write? If you find it troublesome to write, you can just make a hideous expression.” That’s another story.

That is to say, from then on, Huahua and I tacitly kept silent about the whole matter.

No one knows what Huahua thinks, but I do have a kind of luck for the rest of my life, as if the sky was supposed to collapse, but it turned out to be just a rain, and the wet ground evaporated and dried up in a short time, leaving no trace Down.

Everything is looking good, or so it seems.Maybe it will take time for Huahua, but it is only a matter of time to figure it out and let go, I believe.

Yes, it's good for everyone.

"Dumb, I'll bring you preserved egg and lean meat porridge!" The voice of the little lunatic always arrived before his people, even if he was warned N times by the angel in white not to make loud noises in the hospital.

The door of the ward was quickly pushed open, and the little lunatic and Zhou Cheng walked in one after the other—they have come to deliver meals together in recent days.

"Why did you remember to buy porridge?" I asked casually after taking the takeaway box from the little lunatic.

"The mute wants to eat." The answer was very happy.

I was puzzled, I tried my best to recall but there was no similar episode: "When did Huahua say it, why didn't I know?"

The little lunatic cut out: "Why do you have to know what we two say? Are you the Supreme Emperor?"

I was so blocked that I was speechless. Then I looked at the person on the hospital bed. Although his eyes were looking away, the corners of his mouth turned up and betrayed him.

Yes, you are all grandpas.

"Can I be discharged from the hospital this afternoon?" Zhou Cheng asked me.

"Well," I nodded, and answered truthfully, "The doctor said it's fine."

Zhou Cheng smiled subtly: "It seems that you are not very happy."

I shrugged, and there was nothing to hide: "One more day of observation will give you a little more peace of mind."

That little lunatic completely ignored the two of us, and started to ask Huahua what he would like to eat at night, and he said plausibly: "The reason why I bought porridge is to let you have a good stomach to eat at night!"

Damn, didn't you say Huahua asked for it!

While the two were chatting happily, I walked out of the ward with the porridge and rushed to the microwave oven in the lobby of the inpatient department.

Speaking of this microwave oven, it can be regarded as the darling of the inpatient department. Because there is only one, countless family members of patients line up in front of it every day. The scene is as spectacular as buying a train ticket.

I finally finished heating the porridge, and it was already 10 minutes later. I carefully returned with the results of the battle, only to see Zhou Cheng sitting on a bench outside the ward.

I also naturally stopped in front of the ward, and asked strangely: "What's the matter, why are you sitting outside?"

Zhou Cheng didn't speak, but stretched out his finger and pressed his lips to make a "shh" motion.

I subconsciously shut up, only to realize that the door of the ward was ajar, and the little lunatic was talking to Huahua.

The voice of Little Crazy is not loud, but because it is clear and bright, it is easy to separate it from the noisy environment.

"...It's good that you know, it's what it is, why did Feng find you all the way..."

I gasped for breath, and then my heart beat wildly.

"It's not that they don't want women. You know what women are like. They want breasts and buttocks. What do you have?"

"Oh yes, women can still get pregnant. Well, if Feng Yiyi follows you in this life, he will die cleanly in this life, and the whole one will step into the sunset ahead of time!"

……

I couldn't restrain myself and raised my hand, wanting to push open the door and rush in to kick the little lunatic. Do you have a dead child who talks like this? How can you say it in such a bad way, how can you hurt people? Nima did it on purpose!When did I feel that Huahua can't speak?When did I think Huahua was too quiet?He is my brother, I am willing to take care of him even in this life, I...

No, maybe Rong Kai is right in the central idea.Brothers supporting each other and men and women living their lives are two different things. What Huahua wants is different from what I can give.

If Rong Kai's cruel words can make Huahua sober up, then let him speak.

Huahua will definitely feel uncomfortable, very uncomfortable, but suffering can't kill people, can it?

The outstretched hand was slowly retracted and clenched into a fist.

My heart twisted so badly, I opened my mouth, took a deep breath slowly, once, twice, it seemed that the pain didn't hurt so much.

In a daze, I saw Zhou Cheng smile, slightly mocking.

"You man," he said in a low voice, "you can melt a stone when you're enthusiastic, but it's even more ruthless than heartless."

Huahua rested at home for two days after being discharged from the hospital, and then returned to the hotel. Although I didn't agree with it, I didn't stop it too much, because I'm a little scared to face him now, it's true.Often the eyes met, and I didn't know what to say, so I could only say nonsense, or jokes that weren't humorous at all.Zhou Cheng and the little lunatic have not changed their attitude towards me, which makes me very relieved, although they may have already positioned me as a cold-blooded and heartless scum in their hearts.

So to sum up, everyone behaved normally, except me.

That night, I took the hotel's running account to the little lunatic's bedroom and asked him to help tidy it up. When I put down the account and was about to leave, he stopped me and sincerely asked: "Can you stop putting out a picture that is sorry for the people of the world?" Guilty face?"

I was going crazy, so I closed the door tightly, and sat beside him to ask for advice: "I don't want to, but I just have such a strong feeling in my heart."

The little lunatic raised his eyebrows: "What's the matter? Guilt?"

I don't know, but there's no other explanation: "Maybe."

"Actually, it's not necessary," the little lunatic shrugged. "If you want me to say, your guilt may come from your initial impression of Huahua, and has nothing to do with the present."

"how to say?"

"At the very beginning, Huahua appeared in a very weak posture, so you have a fixed impression that Huahua is weak and should not be hurt. If possible, you should try your best to protect him. But in reality Actually, this cognition is outdated, just because of the continuation of the mapping effect, you can’t get rid of this inherent impression. Think about how old Huahua was when you met him? How old is he now? There is an essential difference between a child and a man Yes, maybe one thing in the previous sentence could make him so hurt that he couldn't get up again, but now unless the world is doomed, there is nothing that can really make a person unable to live."

"..."

"How is it?" The little lunatic picked up the water glass at hand and took two big gulps. After moistening his throat, he continued to ask, "Do you feel more comfortable?"

I sighed: "It's hard to say, maybe a little bit."

The little lunatic curled his lips, as if he was not satisfied with the answer: "You'd better figure it out quickly, don't be silly, just let him give up, raise the knife and drop it cleanly!"

Obedient Tingyin'er: "Why does it sound like you really want me to execute him quickly..."

"Anyway, it's dead anyway, and the tone is slow, it's better to behead."

I suddenly felt something strange: "Are you angry?"

"No, why am I angry?" The little lunatic twitched the corners of his mouth with a half-smile, and then sighed heavily, "I'm at most a little upset. You always think you are good to the dumb, but in fact the dumb is to you It’s really nothing to say.”

I always feel that the words of the little lunatic have a lot of subtle emotional color, and I unconsciously asked: "You and Zhou Cheng..."

"It's not the same thing," the little lunatic interrupted me, "If I treat Zhou Cheng like a dumb man treats you, and he still doesn't want me, then I can buy murder."

I have a black thread, and I sincerely thank God: "Fortunately, Huahua is not you."

The little lunatic didn't think so: "This year, the mentally retarded can be cured, but if you are stubborn, there is no cure."

I think Rong Kai is right. I need to maintain a firm position and a firm posture. If possible, I will find another spring day when everyone can calm down and spread everything out under the sun. Open, don't miss any details, organize everything clearly, then pack it up, seal it up, and let it completely become history.

I thought it through very well, and I was about to realize it suddenly, but Huahua didn't give me the chance to implement it.

It was an ordinary morning, and the rain that had lasted for many days still did not stop, and the air was filled with a damp smell, which made people unable to lift their spirits.

As usual, I was the first to get up, I washed up as usual, and I walked into the living room to turn on the TV to watch the morning news, but found that the flowery box spring bed was empty.The quilt was neatly folded, and the sheets were not even wrinkled, but the person was gone.I hurriedly went to the kitchen, to the balcony, and even to the bathroom where I had just washed my face, but found nothing.I even almost knocked on the door of Zhou Cheng and Rong Kai's room, if I didn't see the letter on the coffee table at the last moment.

In fact, the letter was very eye-catching. It had no beginning, no signature, and only a whole page of black and white letters.

[I'm sorry, I left without saying anything, because I really can't tell you.In the two years since I came out, I often think about the old days. You always told me to look forward, so I never dared to tell you. In fact, I think the years in prison with you are happier than the two years after I came out. You They will definitely scold me for being worthless.I don't know how it became like this. When you first came in, I thought you were very annoying.I told you how I was dumb, I don’t know if you still remember, you never asked me about my childhood, so I didn’t have a chance to tell you, in fact, when I was young, I really wanted to talk to other people downstairs The children played together, but no one wanted to take me with them. Then one day a new family moved across the door, and there was also a little girl who was about my age. Because the adults were busy moving furniture, they put her in my house first.We played for a whole afternoon, turning ropes, folding planes, blowing bubbles, and playing house. I still remember it very clearly. I was very happy at that time. I wish I could give her all the delicious and fun things I had. But when I went to find her the next day, she stopped playing with me, because other children told her that I was dumb or disabled.From that day on, she joined the camp of the children downstairs and never said a word to me.For so many years, I have long forgotten what other children look like, but I only remember her. I think I may resent her the most, because other children didn’t play with me at first, but she played with me and left again , I feel very uncomfortable, especially unforgivable.Now can you understand why I was in a bad mood for a while? In fact, I really wanted to quarrel with you at that time. It was you who pulled me back from the edge, but you couldn't accept me. Then you shouldn't pull me from the beginning .But I can't argue with you, because as long as you close your eyes, anything I say is useless, not even a fart.But after I was discharged from the hospital, I thought about it a lot, and I realized that there is no reason to be angry with you.You have been very kind to me since we first met, and not just for a day or two, but for so many years.Really, you are the best to me among the people I have met in this world for so many years.Zhou Cheng said a lot when he persuaded me, but I almost didn't listen to it, but there was one sentence, he said that if you are not good to me, I may not know what happiness is in this life, and I may not be able to get out of prison at all. You were beaten to death in a fight, and it is because you are kind to me and care about me that Hua Diao is now.He asked me, have you got it and lost it or never got it, which one do you choose?I said I chose the front one.I would rather steal such a period of time than never be happy all my life.I know that these days have brought you a lot of trouble, I’m sorry again, I won’t be clinging to you anymore, I’m a big man, I should go out and try my luck, I hope I can learn some skills and become a useful person.Brother, take care of your body and take care. 】