I'm an uncle

"Look carefully... ah~! What a cute little brother, Aliu, when did you hook up with such a beautiful aborigine, tsk tsk, it's a pity to be with you, come~ little brother come to Xiaopeng's place to eat sweets Go." The young man smiled charmingly, picked up two chocolate candies with his slender fingers and handed them to Zhang Sirui.

Before Zhang Sirui could react, Hang Hangliu snatched the candy from his hand and stuffed it back into the boy's hand: "Little friend is not kind, how can you give him this kind of ecstasy candy of unknown origin."

"Sigh, I really don't understand my good intentions, my pharmacist just prepared the 'Piao Piao Yu Xi Wan Pill'. It is a trial product, and you can't buy it outside." The young man looked disappointed.

"Forget it, this kind of aphrodisiac with no quality guarantee may be happy for a while after taking it, but it will last forever. Besides, who knows that after taking this medicine, it will take several times to get rid of the medicinal properties. I have no plans to save people for the rest of my life. Eunuch." Hang Hang Liu quite understood what the other party was thinking.

"...That thing can't be..." Zhang Sirui had a black thread on his forehead, looked at the unidentified candy, it was made no different from ordinary chocolate candy, what was it invented for?suspicious.

"You're right. Let me introduce you. This is the leader of the biggest Kraken gang in this area, Umibozu Tomolan. If you want to find the best woman or man, you can come to him. Of course you want the best You can also come to him for information." Hang Hang gave a crooked thumb and pointed at the smiling young man in Chinese clothes: "Umifangzu means the ancient sea monster, but he is not a sea monster but a human monster."

The young man's smile remained unchanged, with blue veins on his forehead, and he punched Hang Hangliu's waist hard with a fist: "Boy, I chose the monster race, not the shemale, don't make a mistake."

Hang Hangliu clutched his waist and said in pain: "... Pain, pain, pain, the devil believes that you are not a transvestite, and you are obviously dressed as neither man nor woman all day long."

The young man was burning with flames of anger, and he clenched his fists in grief and anger: "Well, I have lowered my appearance by 20%, but I chose a demon clan by mistake and made it too beautiful. , Why would I be picked up by men even when I wear men’s clothes!? What did you say that you thought I was a beautiful girl who likes to dress up as a man, but when I saw a cucumber, I was frightened and stopped.”

"...I heard that that one was trampled by you so hard that you couldn't lift it, you are a berserk monster who tap dances on other people's dicks." Just as Hang Hang Liu complained, he was trampled under by a crazy ladyboy.

"It's hard to meet a gay guy I like, but I despise my mother-in-law, Aliu! You say I'm a mother, ah!? My mother's mother!" Peng Lan was obviously stimulated by some memory, and continued to frantically use the palm left by Hangtian Step on to vent your anger.

Hang Hang left screaming, Zhang Sirui finally came to his senses, and actively saved him before Peng Lan stepped on his palm.

"Hmph, I hate you self-righteous Gongs the most. Is Gongs great? Isn't it a guy with a chrysanthemum? Well, it's Gongs if I have a dick! It's great." Peng Lan was so angry that he even spoke out in dialect.

He took out a cigarette cursingly, stretched out his index finger, lit the cigarette with a ball of green demon fire, and continued to say unhappily: "Why cry, who will show the tears and pity, don't let people think My weakness is bullying men."

Hang Hangliu and Zhang Sirui hung up the black thread together, and said in their heart, obviously you were bullying a man just now, Aliu's (me) palm was almost trampled out of the hole by you.

"Forget it, for the sake of taking good care of my sister's business here, I'll tell you the whereabouts of that one." Peng Lan glanced sideways at Hangtian: "However, I didn't say you, go find your old lover, you bring Who will you show me your current wife? Are the aborigines amazing? What’s wrong with looking down on Zongshou, huh? Could it be that the Gong is the only one, isn’t it the guy with the chrysanthemum..."

Hang Hang Liu interrupted Peng Lan's endless complaints with a wry smile: "Please, kid, this is very important to me, please be merciful and tell me his current whereabouts."

Just walking out of Yelang, Zhang Sirui felt lingering fear: "This Penglan is really powerful, aren't you good at fighting, and you're still afraid of him."

Hang Hangliu was very helpless: "Don't look at the Siren Gang who are in charge of the prostitution business in this area, but they also have a lot of gang thugs. Xiaopeng himself is a veteran master who can enjoy himself in other sub-worlds, otherwise others would be so envious of them. For business, he has come to play a long time ago, so Xiaopeng has the title of Haifangzhu, and there are many capable shrimp soldiers and crab generals under him."

Hang Hangliu said to Zhang Sirui with a serious face: "So remember, women are not easy to mess with, especially transgressive ones."

Before he finished speaking, Hang Hang Liu was hit on the head by a slipper that fell from the sky, and he heard Peng Lan scolding from a distance: "Die, who is talking about a monster, don't you think it's great to be an attacker, isn't it a guy with a chrysanthemum... ..."

"Ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ai ah Twitching, twitching on the ground.

Zhang Sirui took a branch and poked Hang Hang Liu's body: "Hey, are you okay?"

"It's okay, it will be troublesome if you poke it, right? How can you treat me like a bacterium?!" Hang Hang said angrily.

"Ah, don't worry about it, hurry up and find someone, otherwise it will take too long and Ah Wu will be angry." Zhang Sirui accompanied him with a smile.

The original words of Umibozu Tomolan are as follows: Ah~ It’s not easy to find that guy. I heard that he is interested in field battles recently, so you can go to Oli’s top ten classic field battle scenes~!

Zhang Sirui didn't quite understand what a field battle was at the beginning, did he have to visit the battlefield?

However, after Hangtian Liu took him to a few places, the dull Uncle Zhang began to understand the true meaning of these two words.

"Yeah—pervert! Peeping Tom!"

"I found the wrong person, yes, I'm sorry!"

Following the woman's sharp scream, Zhang Sirui scrambled and fled back from the bushes.

When he finally escaped from the pursuit of cheating men and women, and fled to the hiding place left by Aerospace, he found someone leisurely climbing a tree to watch a good show.

"Ah, it looks like that guy isn't here, let's move our nest, there are at least six places we haven't been to among the top ten classic field sites. Keep going~" Hang Hang Liu leisurely swayed on the tree with his legs crossed.

"...You did it on purpose." Zhang Sirui's voice trembled.

"Where are you, you are overthinking, I will never feel dissatisfied because others treat me like poop and poke me with branches. I am very generous." Hang Hangliu took his little finger to dig inside his ear .

"You just care." Zhang Sirui glared angrily at Hang Hang Liu.

"How is it possible, anyway, I am a poop-like person, how can I have thoughts of resentment and revenge?" Hang Hangliu put on an indifferent look.

"It's too fake, who will believe you." Zhang Sirui tried his best to clean off the dirty leaves, rotten branches, and thatch on his head.

In order to see clearly whether the men and women present were the chosen targets, Hang Hang Liu asked him to lie down on the grass secretly to confirm. He was puzzled at first, but after watching countless celestial sex scenes, he finally understood.

"Change the place, we can find someone early so we can go home." Hang Hang Liu jumped off the branch, and continued to move forward to the next scene.

Zhang Sirui tried his best to pooh the dirt out of his mouth, very hard, it was like poohing these dirty things like someone.

When they really found the target, Zhang Sirui was dumbfounded.

It was in a dark valley known for its tranquility, and there was nothing strange around it. There was also a natural waterfall and a pool of green water in the dark valley.

It is simply a scene specially designed by the game company for lovers to date.

In the gate of crossing, if adult couples want to do circles and crosses, they can only go to the happy hotel to open a room.If you do some indecent things outside casually, you will gradually lose your honor points and G points, which can be regarded as punishment for the disciple's undisciplined behavior.

However, some disciples think that the circles and crosses in natural scenes will be more exciting.Therefore, sometimes they will go to places that are not very crowded and do things they like to do.

The Luoxingtan Waterfall is included among the top ten classic field battle scenes that these fans like most.

At this time, Zhang Sirui and Hangtianliu saw such a scene.

In the depths of this very quiet pool, bursts of joyful groans came. If you look closely, you can find two naked bodies intimately intersecting on a white stone beside the waterfall.

A short-haired man on top has a very strong figure, broad shoulders and broad shoulders, a bee waist and a monkey back, a darker complexion, and a dark body full of strength and beauty.

There is also a man under him. The thighs on both sides look fair-skinned. The purple hair spread out on the stone is long, and half of it has slipped into the pool. As his body shakes, the purple hair looks like The flexible water snake twists gently in the pool water.

The two were in a state of confusion, they seemed unaware of the arrival of the uninvited guest, and they were still doing the original piston movement by themselves.

Hang Hangliu frowned, and pulled Zhang Sirui to squat in the grass on one side: "Why do we have to come here to feed mosquitoes when others are happy? Alas, it's really unfair."

Zhang Sirui's face was a little red, this time the two made a big noise.

Damn it, even if you think that there is no one there is no need to make such a loud noise, it is not good to disturb the flowers, plants, insects, insects and birds.

Hang Hang grinned at the corner of his mouth, and smirked: "Uncle, I haven't seen pigs running, at least I have eaten pork. So innocent, be careful to be eaten so that there are no bones left."

Zhang Sirui couldn't help but blushed and said in a low voice: "Who is as promiscuous as you. I, I am preparing, after preparing, I will have sex with my wife..."

Hang Hang stayed silent for a while, and after a while, he looked up at the sky and said, "Uncle, don't look at me now, to be honest, I have been fascinated by others before, but this is the way this world is, without you You won’t die, and you won’t die without others. Since you can’t be someone else’s sun, you have to be a moon surrounded by stars.”

Hang Tianliu turned his head and grinned at Zhang Sirui: "Actually, being a moon man is not bad, it's better than some wolf men who are dissatisfied and have to howl at the moon, right, Mr. wolf man?"

Zhang Sirui was only touched a little, but he was so angry at the phrase 'Mr. Wolf Man', and couldn't help shouting loudly: "Who are you calling a wolf man? Which eye of yours saw me howling at Yue Chang..."

Hang Hangliu immediately covered Zhang Sirui's mouth with his hand, but it was too late.

"Who!"

Hang Hangliu and Zhang Sirui immediately had two long swords around their necks.

The only one who can open his mouth, Hangtianliu twitched the corners of his mouth, and said to the owner of the knife on his neck: "Pausing halfway is not good for your health. Don't pay attention just because it's a game."

"Thank you for your concern. It is also a very bad habit to spy on the intimacy between lovers in the game. Be careful that you will be hacked, Mr. Passerby A and Passerby B." The deep voice obviously showed the owner's very unhappy mood.

"No! I'm really sorry to bother you, we're just here to look for Amakusa Shilang, the second leader of the pornographic photo dissemination group, please do us a favor, Mr. Amakusa." Taking advantage of Hang Hangliu's hand, Zhang Sirui broke free, relying on his feeling He said so to this very masculine man.

It's a pity that he obviously found the wrong partner. The man raised his eyebrows and pointed to the back with his thumb.

Hang Hang Liu also sighed and said, "Uncle, the Lord is behind. Shi Lang, how are you?"

"Oh. Are you looking for me? If you don't come sooner or later, why don't you come here when I'm doing business, and don't spoil my good business next time. Be careful that I will take pictures of you little birds." That beautiful man with purple hair Complaining in a soft tone, while lazily putting on the robe, he didn't bother to tie the robe. With the open skirt, he could only see the white chest looming inside: "You call me Shi Lang, do we know each other?"

"... Amakusa, you bastard! You were the first man I dated back then, have you already forgotten me?"

Amakusa Shi Lang looked Hang Hang Liu up and down, and replied to him after a long time: "Even if I am your first man, I don't intend to take responsibility. Men can't get pregnant anyway."

Hang Hang's forehead showed blue veins: "You have no integrity."

Zhang Sirui listened to the black line on the side, and said to himself, do you have the right to criticize others, Aliu.