wedding dress

The fire in Duke Huguo's mansion when I was nine years old is probably a nightmare that I will never get rid of in my whole life.

I had a fever, talked nonsense, couldn't sleep at night, and my eyes were red when I closed them. Whether I was drowsy or awake, I would only cry for my uncle.

Mu Renhan took me back to the palace for treatment, using the medicinal materials, he was very dedicated.

After more than half a year, I finally recovered, but since then I have forgotten the past.

After Mu Renhan heard the news, he stared at me for a while with dark eyes, then brushed off the medicine bowl in my hand, turned and left.

I looked at the dark juice on the ground, and my body softened.

He won't kill me, but if I drink this bowl again, I don't know what I will become.

That's right, I'm not ignorant, the previous Gu Shenxing who lived under the wing of his uncle was burned to death in that fire, and this one is just a lonely soul locked up in the deep palace , the only meaning of its existence is revenge.

I guess my uncle doesn't want my life to be filled with hatred, but the moment he threw himself into the sea of ​​fire is always endlessly looping in my mind.

I desperately want revenge, but Mu Renhan is on guard against me all the time.

I have been under his surveillance and imprisonment until I was 12 years old. I pretended to be a servant and encouraged the prince, who was two years younger than me, to sneak out of the palace when the guards were changing shifts.

I went back to the deserted Duke Protector's Mansion, but it was nothing like I remembered.

The weeds in the yard grew wildly one after another, and the charred charcoal in the corner was scattered on the spot without anyone picking it up. I grabbed a handful of ashes there, and then carefully wrapped them in a veil.

This is the burial place of my uncle, it always reminds me how Mu Renhan ruined my family!

When I returned to the palace, the road was unimpeded, and I faintly felt that something was wrong, and then I saw Mu Renhan with a gloomy face in the outer hall of my bedroom.

In recent days, he has become more and more reluctant to listen to anything related to the Duke Protector's Mansion, so the fury at this time is justifiable.

I watched him whip the prince ten times, and then walked towards me with the cane.

Maybe he thought I would beg for mercy, but in fact I just lowered my head and sneered without looking at him.

I tensed the muscles in my back, but the pain I imagined did not come for a long time. I raised my head in confusion, but saw that the man was just looking at me blankly.

At that time, I didn't understand the reason why he let me go, until one time I took a selfie in the mirror and saw that my face was [-]% similar to that of my little uncle.

From that day on, I was no longer keen on instigating the prince to make the palace turbulent, but chose to use another method that could hurt him more...

In my memory, every year during the Lantern Festival, my little uncle can’t stay with me at home, he will come back very late, if he finds that my room is lit when he comes back, he will come over and touch my head , Tell me not to wait next time.

I'm afraid of him sometimes because he's ruthless when he lectures me, but what confuses me is that every time he says this, there is a smile on his brow.

At that time, I was afraid that he would bring back an aunt for me one day, so I begged the nanny to take me out on that day in the second year.

……

Sometimes I often wonder if I didn't go out on Lantern Festival that year, if I didn't know anything, would I hate that person less, but this question itself is not established, so I seem to never be able to find it s answer.

Every year, the Shangyuan Festival is the time when the defense of the palace is the most lax. This may sound unbelievable, but it actually made the necessary preparations for me to escape from the palace.

When I was 16 years old, I put on the new clothes that the palace people rushed to make for me, walked out of the palace, and came to the street that year by virtue of my memory.

I know that man is not at the palace, but I don't know if he will be here tonight.

I put on my mask and looked around nervously for a while.

There are tourists coming one after another all around, but I can't find the figure of that person...

I just waited from the willow branches on the moon until the bright moon was in the sky, but when I turned around and thought he would never come again, someone grabbed my shoulder firmly.

The man used such force that it almost crushed my bones.

I resisted the desire to turn around, and after a while, I heard a familiar voice behind me.

"Is that you?" he asked tremblingly.

I froze and didn't answer.

The man slowly turned to my eyes.

He pursed his lips tightly, and his dark green eyes showed great joy. He still grabbed my shoulder, as if he was afraid that I would run away, but he kept a certain distance from me, as if he didn't even dare to touch me. one time.

"Yes...is that you?"

He asked this sentence carefully, as if a loud voice could shatter something in the dark.

I hooked the corners of my lips coldly, and then watched him slowly reach out to my mask full of hope...

I can roughly understand why my little uncle fell in love with him.

This man's eyes can speak, and I saw the great joy in his eyes wither at the moment the mask was taken off, and his hand holding my shoulder dropped powerlessly, the pain in his eyes made me Feel deeply happy.

This gap from hope to despair is the most excruciating.

I am not afraid of death, I am only afraid that he will live too well.

Mu Renhan didn't deal with me, but I never saw the guard on duty that day again.

After he went back, he became seriously ill. From that day on, he, an emperor with half Hu blood, also became obsessed with pills.

I guess the court hall should have exploded, because the entire inner palace was filled with silence.He has long been criticized by the courtiers for not accepting concubines, and now...

I don't know medical skills, but I also know that swallowing elixir is actually harmful and has no benefit.

I suspect that he is crazy. Did he let go so easily after sacrificing my little uncle's stable life?

I didn't understand his thoughts, so I tried every means to get close to his bedroom.

This man is very kind to me in some ways.For example, my role has always been compared with that of the prince. Maybe I can come and go in and out of the inner palace at will, and I can even attend political affairs like the prince...

I guess I can't outlive him, and he's pretty confident that I won't have any problems while he's alive.

So I deliberately approached without much effort.

I stood in a hidden corner and watched him take the pill every day.

Maybe he knew it was me standing outside the door, but he just didn't bother to take care of it.

I often feel that this carved door seems to separate us into different worlds.

Sometimes, he would ask questions while reviewing the memorial, which made me think there was another person in the room.And most of the time, he just stared blankly at a wooden altar in a daze, and then he went out of the bedroom, acting as if nothing had happened.

I don't know where I got so much patience, but I have been insisting on going back and forth between the two halls every day, and I never get tired of it.

I have been paying attention to him, so I naturally know that his illness is not sudden.

In the past two years, his dosage of medication has become more and more unrestrained, and he even listened to the absurd words of the Taoist priests, and really made some soul-returning incense.

I guessed that he would be seriously ill, but I didn't expect his illness to be so severe.

The new emperor was in the prime of his life in spring and autumn, but he suddenly asked the prince to supervise the country. All of a sudden, rumors abounded between the government and the public.

Although I hate him, I also know that this is not the time for him to fall down.The prince was taught very well by him, but after all, he lacks experience and cannot support such a big country.Maybe he is cruel by nature, but he is a good emperor. I never thought of using this country that has finally stabilized to be buried with the entire Gu family.

So, I started to go to Shiji frequently.

He fell into a coma, but I kept mentioning Gu Congzhi in his ear.

I don't know if the name really stimulated him, but he really woke up suddenly after a few days.

I looked into his cloudy eyes and said flatly, "Your Majesty, I hope you will take good care of the dragon's body."

"From then on..." He murmured with some difficulty.

I smiled when I heard the words: "What is Your Majesty talking about? I don't understand."

After all, Mu Renhan was in the prime of his life, and in addition to his good health, even after a few days of recuperation, he could not see any signs of his previous illness.

I still stand outside his hall every day as usual, but his self-talk is obviously more than before.

I know that Mu Renhan has been hollowed out.

He is thinner than before, not very old, and his temples are also white, he still maintains a dignified silence, but this time he really saves as much as he can, and doesn't say much except in the bedroom .

Sometimes I think he lives like a self-torture, as if he doesn't smile, like a wandering ghost, his eyes are empty.

He persisted in this way for another two years, until the prince was mature enough.

His death was actually foreshadowed.

That day I stood outside the hall and saw him sitting on the futon, staring at the wooden altar as always.

He just stayed there so quietly, but I was a little restless when he stayed there.

Just when I was about to turn around and leave, his hoarse voice came from behind.

His throat seemed to have something wrong in that fire. I don't know his voice before, but now as long as he speaks loudly, I feel a heart-piercing feeling inexplicably.

I heard him say, "From..."

I paused, and then listened quietly, but there was nothing to say.

I frowned and waited for a while, but when I was impatient and wanted to leave again, I heard choked up crying inside.

I turned my head in disbelief, only to see the man's shoulders slumped, and the whole person shrank into a ball.

"You hate me so much! Hate me so much!" He grabbed the ground with his left hand, his knuckles turned white, and whispered, "I can't wait... I can't wait anymore! This life is really too long..."

I suddenly felt like I couldn't listen anymore.

Perhaps, he is serious about loving my little uncle.

The last thing he saw before he died was me.

When I saw him lying on the bed, still retaining his usual majestic appearance, I felt a little sad for some reason.

"You guys really look like..." he muttered to himself, "whether it's appearance or personality...can you get closer?"

I stood where I was and didn't move.

There was obvious disappointment on his face, and then he closed his eyes sleepily.

I didn't know if I should quit, but after hesitating for a long time, he opened his eyes and looked at me with a smile: "Are you unhappy when I take the elixir?"

I guess he was a little delirious, and before he could answer, he said again: "Don't be angry, I just... miss you so much."

Looking at the tenderness in his dark green eyes, I suddenly realized something.

This person has never forgotten Gu Congzhi, no matter what I do, sooner or later, he will force himself to death.

Mu Renhan stretched out his arms towards me, then smiled: "Together?"

I saw the great hope in his eyes and the sudden glow, and I knew it was difficult for him to get through today.

I stretched out my hand out of nowhere, but he didn't seem to be sick and grabbed me tightly, firmly.

Then he smiled as if relieved: "That's great..."

I suddenly didn't hate him so much, I even wanted to smile at him, but the man's arm suddenly dropped down.

In that year, the entire capital was covered in silver. I don't know how old he was at that time, but I know it was the No. 11 year when Gu Congzhi died.

The author has something to say: It is not accurate to say that there is a bug. The stupid author likes to browse through the article before publishing

But today's chapter is how to see how dissatisfied, so I changed the perspective and rewrote it

This time I feel much better [I don’t know how you feel swollen? ?

Sorry for making everyone wait so long~~

ying ying ~~