Psycho

Ye Zi opened his eyes, and what he saw was a gray ceiling, and the paint in some places had cracked.The dusty bulb was black and hung like a dead mouse, ready to fall at any moment.

The bed he slept on was narrow and not elastic.The quilt also had a musty smell.The room was very messy and messy, with books, lunch boxes, and clothes piled up everywhere. Fortunately, it was cold now, so I haven't seen those disgusting creatures yet.

thirsty.Then boil some water.

Ye Zi got up slowly, went to the kitchen barefoot, and boiled water in an iron pot.

On the way to boil the water, he came to the living room with only a few square meters and looked at the furnishings in the living room, feeling familiar yet unfamiliar.In the living room, there is a rotten sofa with holes, a coffee table with a lot of things piled up, an old-fashioned small TV, and a cabinet.

Probably the most valuable thing in this room is this cabinet.Of course, this one was moved directly from the previous house.

The one on the cabinet is my mother.

Ha, that might be a little weird.It should be said that the ashes of Han Yao, her black and white photos, wooden tablet and a small plate of burnt incense are placed on it.

Yes, she is dead.How come I almost forgot again.

She is really a poor woman. She has remarried successfully and is pregnant. She tells herself every day that she wants a daughter, and she has even chosen a name, which is Liu Ruoyan.

But she was ill.In order to treat the disease, the house was sold, but she still died.

After boiling the water, Ye Zi turned on the phone while drinking.

After turning it on, he received many, many text messages. Of course, don't get me wrong, no one he knows will send him text messages.He has no friends.Those text messages are all arrears notices, such as Unicom, and rent.

Well, at least, he saw a useful message, February 2016, 2.

So, isn't today his birthday?

Well, so today is a day worth celebrating, let's go buy a cake.

Speaking of which, he was still living in 2012 in the dream.Now, is he 27 years old, or 28?Forget it, it doesn't matter.

After taking a shower for the first time in a long time, he wrapped several sweaters and went out in a crumpled down jacket.

It was very cold outside, but there were many people.The streets are full of people, talking, laughing, running, and dancing, as if everyone is living happily.

After a few steps, I met a dog.The dog barked vigorously at Ye Zi, as if it had seen a ghost.

The dog's owner pulled the dog away, and Ye Zi happened to see a piece of glass that could be used as a mirror.He walked over, looked at himself, and thought that it was justifiable to be regarded as a ghost like this.The person in the glass has disheveled hair, thin and yellowish skin, heavy dark circles under the eyes, and stubble on the chin.Forget it, don't read it.

Ye Zi stepped on the snow and walked through the sea of ​​people.

He walked into the nearest cake shop and looked around.Originally, he wanted to buy a big cake, but unfortunately he was too poor. If he bought a big one, he would have no money to eat.Had to buy a very small one.

On the way home, he saw Jiang Wei across the road.Still the same, wearing gorgeous clothes, beautiful figure.

And Ye Zi was not surprised at all, after passing her by, he subconsciously looked towards the platform, and sure enough, he saw the crooked old woman again.But when he took a second look, they disappeared again.

Nothing weird, just an illusion.

It's just an illusion.

Just as he was thinking this, he saw a tall man not far ahead.

He was wearing a white down jacket, black trousers and khaki ankle boots.His hair is very light, like tawny.

He just walked in front, holding the ingredients in both hands.

Ye Zi was extremely familiar with him like this.Because the rabbit is always like this, he went to buy the ingredients by himself, and after returning home, he spent several hours cooking, then put the finished product in front of Ye Zi, and asked with a smile: Is it delicious?

Seeing him like this, Ye Zi immediately dropped the cake to the ground.

And he completely ignored the cake, he strode forward, obviously he knew it might be just an illusion, but he still ran towards the rabbit like a lunatic, shouting: "Ye Chengxi! Ye Chengxi!"

Then, he saw that beside the rabbit, there was a girl.

The girl has long black hair and wears a beautiful red dress.

The girl held the rabbit's hand and smiled sweetly.

Ye Zi stopped, it seemed that even the tears he shed in excitement just now seemed to have frozen into ice.

Like a robot, he turned his head and walked slowly towards the poor cake.The cake that fell to the ground was deformed even though it was protected by a carton.But it's okay, it's okay.

It seems that everyone around is looking at him, what are they looking at, have you never seen a wretched man who loves to eat cakes and cry?

Ye Zi returned home as fast as she could, and shut the door tightly, even the windows.

Then I ate the cake and watched TV.

Although the cake has been deformed, it is still very delicious.

The same goes for TV, what kind of funny show is this, it's so funny.

But it's really strange, why are you always crying? Is it because I haven't been out for a long time, so when I encounter the cold wind, I cry?Could it be that he has really become a wretched man who loves to cry?

Everything in front of him became more and more blurred, Ye Zi could only keep wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.

When he looked at the TV clearly again, he found that the TV program had changed.

It turned into scenes that are not familiar to him, into his real memory, everything about him and Ye Chengxi——

Ye Zi and Ye Chengxi are brothers.Ye Zi is an adopted child, while Ye Chengxi is her own.

Ye Zi hated Ye Chengxi at first, after all, he thought Ye Chengxi took away his father's love.But later, because Ye Chengxi did a series of things that moved him, for example, Chengxi once wore a rabbit mask to please Ye Zi, Ye Zi's heart softened, and he began to like his younger brother.Especially after he was 11 years old, because he had experienced too many things, his sunny and lovely younger brother gradually became his spiritual sustenance.

If you want to talk about what he has experienced, first, it is a broken family; second, it is something he never wants to recall - sexual harassment.

The breakdown of the relationship between Ye Cheng and Han Yao was caused by Jiang Wei.I don't know what Jiang Wei's psychology is, she took a photo of Han Yao kissing her male classmate at the class reunion.The photo was later found to have been processed, but this incident was the fuse of their relationship breakdown.

The sexual harassment was done by Han Yao's boyfriend.More than a year after Han Yao left Ye Zi's house, one of his male colleagues chased her, and soon they started dating, and her boyfriend often went to Ye Zi's house.This man is a typical pedophile.In the beginning, he was just messing around with Ye Zi, Ye Zi was young and didn't understand.Later, he got even worse, as soon as Han Yao left, he would make Ye Zi take off her clothes and touch every part of Ye Zi's body...

Ye Zi didn't want to recall what happened in detail for the rest of his life.

At that time, he wanted to tell his mother, but was threatened by that man. He was afraid of making his mother lose her happiness, so he didn't dare to say anything.When he was 13 years old, he had a mental breakdown.Ye Zi was saved only after being discovered by a junior high school teacher.

Han Yao broke up with that man, but Ye Zi's heart was closed ever since.He didn't want to fall in love, and felt that sex was an extremely disgusting thing, and his psychology became more and more gloomy.

Since then, he has been afraid of contacting others, no matter men or women.

Except for one person, his younger brother, Ye Chengxi.

He felt that Ye Chengxi was really the person who liked him the most in the world.When his younger brother was in elementary school, he often came to him by car alone, and ran to the gate of his school to wait for him. After he sent his younger brother back to the house and left, he would always look back habitually.Because he knew that his younger brother must be standing in front of the glass window, crying and shouting: Azi, Azi, don't go, don't go!

Every time he leaves, his younger brother cries; every birthday of his, his younger brother knows; every word he says to his younger brother, his younger brother listens; his younger brother says: A Zi, I like you the most.When we grow up, we will be together!

Every time he thinks of his younger brother's "confession", Ye Zi will feel happy.At least, he still has a brother and a mother, so he's doing well.

However, Ye Chengxi was sent abroad to study since junior high school.This trip is a full five years.

Due to various reasons, the two contacted less and less, and then there was no news.

Regarding his younger brother, Ye Zi was completely disheartened.

In college, Ye Zi met the first girl who confessed to him, Nie Haixia.He began to try to date this girl, hoping that he could live a normal life like a normal college student.

However, there is no way for him to hold hands with Nie Haixia, let alone other contacts!

When he was troubled, he saw Ye Chengxi who had returned to his country again.

Ye Chengxi was waiting for him at the gate of his school, and when he saw him, he shouted loudly, "Azi, I'm back!"

Five years, completely changed Ye Chengxi.Ye Zi was a little dizzy looking at him who had become tall and handsome, but he was not at all happy.

Because the brighter and more outstanding Ye Chengxi is, the more he can bring out his filth and darkness.The brighter Ye Chengxi's smile was, the more pathetic Ye Zi's painful waiting would be.

So he ignored Ye Chengxi.He crossed the road and bought dinner for Nie Haixia in the snack street.

However, the cheeky Ye Chengxi said behind him: Azi, I miss you, I miss you so much!

Ye Zi is really a soft-hearted person.

In short, Ye Chengxi was forgiven after pestering and explaining several times.The connection between the two is increasing, and they are more like friends than brothers.Ye Zi often takes Chengxi to his apartment for an afternoon nap, and he occasionally goes to Ye Chengxi's villa for dinner.Ye Chengxi is very good at cooking, and every time he cooks it is quite delicious.

Under such circumstances, Ye Zi told Ye Chengxi his troubles - he couldn't have sex with women.In fact, he can't seem to do it with anyone, he doesn't feel it.

Ye Chengxi didn't believe it, so he found an island movie and released it for Ye Zi to watch.

Ye Zi really didn't feel anything at all.

Ye Chengxi said: A Zi, let me check it for you.

Ye Zi agreed.

Then, Ye Chengxi put his hand into Ye Zi's pants...

Ye Zi quickly discovered the fact that shocked him.He actually had a feeling.It was a feeling he had never experienced before.

After orgasm, he was especially ashamed.He pushed Ye Chengxi away, wanting to leave.

Ye Chengxi was charmed by his flushed face, she buried her head and kissed him, it was Ye Zi's first kiss.

Once there is a second time.At first, it was all resistance, but soon, it would sink in.And Ye Zi is like this. At the beginning, he was so resistant to sex, but he became more and more inseparable from Ye Chengxi. His whole person changed, from indifference to enthusiasm, to dependence on the other party, He fell in love with Ye Chengxi completely.

Not long after, Ye Zi broke up with Nie Haixia and started dating Ye Chengxi secretly.

They are romantic during a relationship.Ye Zi helped Ye Chengxi with tuition, and Ye Chengxi washed Ye Zi's clothes.They often go to far places to play, hold hands and kiss in dark places, and keep a distance in sunny places, secretly laughing.

After Ye Zi graduated, they lived together, just like newlyweds, they lived happily.

At that time, Ye Zi's only wish was to be with Ye Chengxi like this, for the rest of his life.

And when did such happiness come into question?

The problem was, the old woman.The old woman is Ye Cheng's trusted servant, and she saw Ye Zi and Ye Chengxi kissing with her own eyes, she told Ye Cheng about it, Ye Cheng was furious, and called Ye Chengxi back in the middle of the night , scolded him, and forced him to drive Ye Zi out immediately.

Ye Zi is not an idiot, of course he understands what he should do.

Only when Ye Chengxi euphemistically said "Let's separate temporarily" did Ye Zi drag his suitcase and left Ye Chengxi's villa.

This incident made a big fuss and went online.I don't know who took the photo of Ye Zi and Ye Chengxi making out, which caused heated discussions on the Internet.After Ye Zi's mother found out, she was greatly shocked, which may have something to do with her subsequent colon cancer.

Ye Zi's company naturally also knew the news, Ye Zi received many attacks, the most serious one was his boss, Zhang Tao.Zhang Tao directly poured medicine on him and dragged him into the hotel.

That night, Ye Zi called Ye Chengxi countless times, but Ye Chengxi didn't answer.

Desperate Ye Zi hit Zhang Tao on the head with a wine bottle, and ran out staggeringly.

Of course, what greeted him was that the next day, he was arrested and taken to the police station, and it was Ye Chengxi who found someone to get him out.

Ye Zi then developed a high fever, originally thought that Ye Chengxi would take care of him day and night as before, but he was wrong.Ye Chengxi just bought him some medicine and left soon.The reason is that this matter has become a big issue now, and he doesn't want to cause other people to misunderstand.

Later, Ye Zi's mother came to take care of him.He lay down for a week.

Afterwards, he changed jobs and did not contact Ye Chengxi for the time being.

By chance, he heard his colleague talk about something about the heir of the Ye family, and he naturally talked about Ye Chengxi, who was studying in university, and his fiancée.

Then Ye Zi discovered that Ye Chengxi's fiancée was actually Nie Haixia!

Nie Haixia's family background is excellent, she is pretty, and has a good personality. She and Ye Chengxi are a typical sibling relationship, and they are a perfect match.

Ye Chengxi and Nie Haixia often participate in large-scale events together, and they look like golden boys and girls, golden partners.Ye Chengxi was tall and handsome, with elegant manners.And Nie Haixia also likes to wear red dresses, which look particularly eye-catching.

In addition to formal occasions, they usually go to places that girls like to go.For example, go to the playground, go to the aquarium, go to the beach.

At times like that, Nie Haixia always held Ye Chengxi's wrist in a friendly manner, smiling sweetly.

If you want to say why Ye Zi knows this, it's very simple, because he followed them.He was like a shady pervert, stalking them every day, every day, and even lost his job just to stalk them.

Finally, after he felt that the previous turmoil had subsided, he thought to himself that he could be with Ye Chengxi again.After all, what Ye Chengxi said earlier was "let's separate temporarily".

Optimistic, he did an extremely embarrassing thing.On Valentine's Day, he put on the rabbit clothes, and ran to Ye Chengxi with a bouquet of flowers like a big rabbit.If you want to talk about why he did this, it is because for him, the rabbit is a very wonderful and happy thing.When she was a child, Ye Chengxi used a rabbit mask to curry favor with him. When she grew up, Ye Chengxi often bought him rabbit balloons and drew him rabbit cartoons.

Of course, it turned out that he was wrong.

Because Ye Chengxi's face was full of embarrassment.

Before the flowers were sent out, Ye Chengxi received a call, saying that something needs to be dealt with immediately.Then he hurried away.

Ye Zi still comforted herself at that time, it must be because her dress was too exaggerated, which made Ye Chengxi feel ashamed.

After that, he went to see Ye Chengxi again.

Ye Chengxi seemed very guilty, and said a lot of words, but the meaning was very clear: Although I like you very much, I can't be with you.Let's be brothers. By the way, our company happens to have a sales position that is very suitable for you. Do you want to come and do it?

Ye Zi lowered her head and rejected Ye Chengxi's favor.

He didn't cry, didn't make trouble.

Because he knew that as an older brother, if he continued to cry and make trouble, he would probably laugh out his big teeth.

When he got home, he sorted out all the things related to the rabbit, sealed the box, dragged it out and burned it.He deleted all contact information of Rabbit.He fell asleep for three days.

He thought his bad luck was over, but it was obvious that his luck would only get worse.

That was the year his mother was diagnosed with bowel cancer.

The intensive care unit costs [-] a day, and any imported drug costs seven to eight thousand.No way, sold the house for medical treatment.

But in the end, the mother died.

On the day his mother died, Ye Zi called Ye Chengxi again. At that time, he thought, he just wanted to hear Ye Chengxi say to him, "It's okay, I'm still here."But it turned out that he was thinking too much, he called three times, but Ye Chengxi didn't answer.

Of course, he later found out that the reason was that Ye Chengxi had changed her phone and number.

But so what?It doesn't matter anymore.

After her mother was buried, Ye Zi rented the current house, which was small and rotten.

Ye Chengxi later found out about this and came to find Ye Zi, but Ye Zi didn't open the door for him.

Later, an empty account of Ye Zi had an extra 50 for no reason, and Ye Zi threw the card away.

He has nothing, but he is more optimistic than before.He went to many companies for interviews, and later went to a training institution as a consultant.Somehow, he's doing pretty well, and the boss is happy with him.

This job has two days off every week. If there is nothing to do, Ye Zi will easily think about things. He hoped that his life would be more fulfilling, so he signed up for another class to learn Taekwondo.

He obviously thought that he had finally changed his luck, but he was probably doomed not to be happy.

One night, he worked the night shift and didn't come home until 08:30.As a result, when he reached a darker place, he was knocked out and taken away.

When he woke up, he found himself in an open space, standing in front of him were several stalwart and dubious social youths.There were beer bottles and cigarette butts all over the floor.A beautiful woman in a short skirt and high heels stood between them.

That is Nie Haixia.

Ye Zi didn't understand what Nie Haixia was going to do.

But Nie Haixia showed her power first and asked those people to strip Ye Zi's clothes.

She said: I want to see how disgusting you are when you are raped, so I let Cheng Xi call your name every day!

Then those men who had already been overexcited due to taking drugs rushed towards Ye Zi.

Fortunately, Ye Zi was not so unlucky this time, the self-defense technique he learned protected him.

He broke free from the rope and escaped successfully.

However, this was only the beginning of the tragedy.

Two days later, on February 2st, Ye Chengxi brought him to the villa.He thought Ye Chengxi was going to celebrate his birthday, of course, how could it be possible.

The haggard Ye Chengxi told Ye Zi that Nie Haixia was gang-raped by gangsters and committed suicide yesterday.

Ye Zi was overjoyed when he heard it, thinking it was a good thing, who told that woman to come and harm him.

The tragedy is that Ye Chengxi didn't listen to Ye Zi's excuse at all. He thought that Ye Zi asked someone to gang-rape Nie Haixia and force her to commit suicide.Who told Nie Haixia to always act like a good girl in front of him.He probably thinks that Nie Haixia is the purest and kindest woman in the world, right?

And what about Ye Zi?What is Ye Zi?A person who was abandoned by his parents from birth, a person who was abandoned by his adoptive father at the age of 11, a person who was defiled at the age of 13, a person who fell in love with his younger brother hopelessly, and a person whose adoptive mother died when he was in his 20s, A poor and hateful person, a person who is used to being discarded so he can be discarded at will, a shameless, ugly, dirty, disgusting bitch!

If we say that when Ye Cheng abandoned Ye Zi, Ye Zi could bear it;

If, when Ye Chengxi abandoned Ye Zi, Ye Zi could bear it;

If, on the night of Han Yao's death, Ye Zi could still bear it;

If it is said that when Ye Zi lost his job and had no money to eat, he could bear it...

And now, his last bottom line has completely collapsed.

He's crazy.

So he started laughing and he said: Yeah, I told those people to rape her.In fact, I want to kill her directly!Who told her to snatch you away?Who told you to choose her?Who told you not to choose me? ?

As expected, he angered Ye Chengxi.

Ye Chengxi picked up the knife and stabbed him.

But how could he die so directly?At least, he should die more artistically, just like his favorite poem, he must first feel a chase that belongs only to him, and then die, wouldn't that be better?

So he ran out of the door and ran to the suburbs, he turned his head from time to time to check if Ye Chengxi was still chasing him, and he slowed down from time to time, waiting for the person who wanted to kill him.

Whenever he saw Ye Chengxi chasing him, he felt very excited and happy.

Every time he heard Ye Chengxi yelling his name, he could be moved to tears.

After all, at this moment, Ye Chengxi could only look at him.

At this moment, it seemed that there were only the two of them in this world.

He laughed while running, and cried while running.

He fantasized about dying under Ye Chengxi's knife on this beautiful evening.

Imagine Ye Chengxi crying in the sea of ​​blood.Ye Chengxi's crying face must be beautiful.

However, his last hope was also shattered.

Because - Ye Chengxi didn't kill him.

His knife didn't cut Ye Zi's neck, so he stood up and left.

……

…………

Ye Zi turned off the TV and lay down on the rotten sofa.

He flipped through the things on the coffee table, copied the accumulation of classic poems, magazines with beautiful bird cages on the cover, and countless photos of Ye Chengxi, from when he was a child to when he grew up...

He started laughing, shaking so much that he couldn't breathe well.He felt that his whole life was a joke, and that it was a miracle of life that he was still alive at this moment.Should he thank heaven, thank the Lord?

After about five or six minutes, he suddenly stopped smiling.

There is still half of the cake left, and he also feels that he has lost his appetite.

I looked at the time, it was already 9 o'clock in the evening.

Although I don't feel sleepy, it's time to sleep.

He became excited again, like a child about to start playing a game.

Drink a cup of hot milk, then brush your teeth and rinse your mouth.Put on pajamas, lie on the bed, put on headphones, and the sound of holy music comes.He swallowed a sleeping pill, felt it wasn't enough, and swallowed another.Then he smiled and closed his eyes, and said to himself:

"I don't know what stage it will start this time?"

"Will what I see be the grown-up you, or the young you?"

"I want to be with you forever." Speaking of this sentence, Ye Zi's voice suddenly became hoarse.

Then, his eyes were still red, and his mouth was deflated.

After several seconds, he said intermittently: "... Rabbit, I... want to see you... I want to see you!"

The author has something to say: Freud said: "Dreams are the fulfillment of desires."

And Ye Zi's dream was like this, killing those who spoiled him, hurt him, and hindered him and the rabbit, in the dream, he got the love of the rabbit.

And because his dream was too complete, the image of the rabbit has actually formed a complete and ideal individual under the manipulation of his consciousness, which is completely different from the real "Ye Chengxi".This point can be found by carefully reading the rabbit's reaction in the previous chapter.

Uh, I'm not going to spoil the spoiler--