father - home

I strolled back from Joseph's cottage, walking on the road full of flowers on both sides, the cement road exuded the residual heat of the day, and the crushed mint, chamomile and white chrysanthemum gave off a burst of aroma under my feet.Today, my mother didn't let the gas street lamps be lit, but the moonlight was very good, and the road, fountain, big house, and the whole manor were shrouded in a soft and clear light.I heard the sound of gurgling water, saw the reflection of the moon in the water, and smelled a mellow and tangy smell, which was the smell of water, or it might be the wine in my hand.

I leaned against the fountain, half sitting, half standing, gazing out at my childhood home.In the night, everything becomes gentle, fresh and peaceful.There is no light, only moonlight and fireflies; no human voice, only running water, insects and grass.The hazy big house makes people feel warm aftertaste, and the blurred outline of Poseidon, the god of the sea, makes him a kind old man... I raised the bottle to him, and he was the witness of my absurdity, struggle, persistence, and pursuit. "To you, for the past we cannot go back to."

None of us can go back.

Joseph and I drank two more bottles until he was sprawled on the table, snoring.I stayed with him without stopping.He has never been so happy in front of me, so relaxed.Maybe he wants to celebrate, finally let go of the heavy feelings, maybe he wants to drink away his sorrow, let the wine dilute the bitter taste.I accompany him, talking and laughing.I have said many times: come back.No matter what happens, this is your home.Don't care about me, as long as you want, as long as you say, I can never come back and never appear in front of you.To this family, you are more important than me.However, he interrupted each time, intentionally at first, and then unconsciously.I had to give up my efforts. After all, I won't be forgiven so easily. The hatred in his heart is still there, but he still loves me and doesn't want to hurt me.

It took me a lot of effort to bring Joseph back to the hut, settle him down, and dare not leave immediately. When I watched him, I drank a lot of wine before I knew it, and my mood became comfortable and sad.Yes, wine is a good thing, no wonder people use it to get rid of their sorrows. When drunk, sorrow becomes sweet and pain becomes enjoyment.

I walked into the dark kitchen, turned on the light, and was startled. I didn't expect that there was a person lying on the table.I was even more surprised when the man raised his head. "Yu? Why don't you go to bed? It's past midnight."

Yu looked at me and didn't answer right away.

As I approached her, I realized it wasn't a moment of confusion from waking up, but she hadn't figured out what to say.

I put the almost empty wine bottle on the table, my body swayed, my vision was hazy, the girl in front of me was extremely beautiful, a tender feeling rose from my chest, I smiled, reached out and grabbed the girl's shoulders, and held her pull up. "Yu, you are so beautiful."

Yu frowned, turned her head to avoid it with a disgusted expression, maybe it was my mouth full of alcohol.

I was still smiling, with an ambiguous tone. "Are you waiting for me?"

With a "snap", I immediately felt a burning pain on the left side of my face. I let go of my hand in shock, my eyes widened inexplicably, my mouth was open but I couldn't speak.

"You are so shameless!"

What?The sweet drunkenness disappeared in an instant, but my mind was still unable to think. I stared at the girl in front of me for no reason.Why are you so beautiful and yet so hideous?

"Does Zhao know?"

"What?" I still couldn't understand.

"Stop pretending! Does Zhao know about you and Joseph?"

"Joseph? You..."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hear it. Unfortunately, it happened that at that time, I was passing the wine cellar, and your voices were too loud."

"You know everything?"

"Does Zhao know?"

I don't know how much Yu heard, and I don't know what she thinks, I can only tell the truth.I nod.

"Zhao knows? Who told him? You told him?"

I nodded again.

"You...you are more shameless and despicable than I imagined."

Under the incandescent lamp, Yu's eyes were red with angry flames.I didn't dare to face it squarely, and lowered my head timidly.

"No wonder, no wonder Zhao is in such pain, no wonder he proposed to me, no wonder you congratulated me when I told you, and Madam was in a hurry to arrange the marriage for us."

"No, Yu, listen to me..." And I didn't know how to say it.

"Listen to what? Zhao loves you! You know he loves you, but you failed him and lied to him. I never understood this. I have known Zhao for a long time, and I know he is not gay. Wrong, but, but, when I saw him again, he fell in love with you."

Then Joseph's voice sounded: "Now that I think about it, I finally understand his eyes and his mood. He likes jade, at least once. He is in pain because of the loss of his beloved girl, and this pain is only for him. I can taste it alone, because it is his own choice. I understand, I will not blame him, he is as miserable as me... No, he is more miserable than me, not only can he not protect Yu, but also hurt her, At the end of the day, he has nothing of his own."

"Well, love is love. I love Zhao, and I respect any choice he makes. How many times have I prayed for you and blessed you. No matter what others think, no matter how dangerous the environment is, I swear to do everything I can to help He, as long as he can be happy, I am willing to do anything."

"Then promise him!" I interrupted Yu suddenly and said loudly.

"what?"

I stared at Yu with trembling lips.I can no longer bear her accusations, her confessions.I have a lot of things to say to her, and I need someone to share my pain. I know she is the most suitable, because her feelings for Zhao are no less than mine. They are equally deep, hot, and intense, and her love itself is more pure. no time.But I can't say it, I can't say it, there's no point in saying it, it doesn't do any good.I said with difficulty: "I said promise him, please promise to marry him."

"You..." Yu shook her head vigorously, unable to believe what she was seeing.

I can't believe it either.I was in too much pain, I did things against my will again and again, hurting myself, hurting others, hurting Zhao, but I didn't know why.I got down on one knee, took the girl's hand, and mustered up the courage to look her in the eye. "If you really love Zhao, as you said, then agree to him, agree to his marriage proposal, please!"

Yu withdrew his hand fiercely, squinting his eyes and staring at me. "Why? Why did you do it? You won't tell me it's because you love him?"

I crooked my mouth, trying to put on a cynical smile. "I liked him...you saw it too...I have been in love with Joseph for many years, but my parents didn't agree, we were forced to separate...these years, I was lonely, lonely, painful...Yu, you are not an ordinary girl , I think you know that men have physical needs. When you miss a woman, you can go to a brothel, but if you miss a man," I shook my head with a wry smile, and my tone became lighter and lighter. "In the current situation, I don't dare to look around. Zhao is very beautiful, very attractive, and his homosexuality charges, that can't blame me, at first I didn't know he was wronged. I saved him, fell in love with him, He fell in love with me too, just like that..." I gradually spoke smoothly, with a rather shameless look. "I didn't expect that my mother would agree to me and Joseph because of this, and I didn't expect that Zhao would love me so deeply. It's true that I seduced him and failed him, but I never hid anything from him, and I didn't intend to use it. Him. Fortunately, it won't be long, I think he will transform back..."

As expected, I received another heavy slap on the left cheek.My ears buzzed, but my cheeks didn't hurt much.I didn't hear what Yu said clearly, and I kept smiling until she turned around and ran out of the kitchen quickly, before falling backwards.