father - home

With a thrust of my head, I woke up from my doze, straightened my back in the chair, and sat up straight.I raised my wrist to check the time, but couldn't.The lights in the ward were not turned on, only a trace of light from the corridor came in from the small observation window in the door, which was blocked by a screen.Like the military and political departments, the air defense requirements of the hospital are very high, and the curtains are replaced with completely opaque fabrics.After dark, the head nurse carefully checks every window to make sure that the curtains are drawn tightly so that no light can see through. Therefore, no matter how good or bad the weather is, or whether there is a moon or not, the ward is completely dark when the lights are turned off.

I carefully walked around the screen, thinking of going to the corridor to get some air and smoke a cigarette. I passed a hospital bed, and the moans from there suddenly increased. It was a patient who had undergone a cesarean section two days ago. Moaning.

I walked over to her and asked in a low voice, "Excuse me ma'am, do you need help?"

As if she was waiting for me, she grabbed my arm and said eagerly, "Thank you, sir, I want to go to the toilet."

I smiled, comforted her, let her wrap her hands around my neck, carefully picked her up, and carefully carried her out to the bathroom.

This is not the first time, not only her, at least half of the 18 patients in the ward are weak and inconvenient after surgery. At night, the family members go back, only the nurse on duty, it is difficult to call, even if you call Come on, when petite nurses can't help much, I, the No.[-] person in the ward-the only man, became their temporary nurse.

At first, when they saw Werner bring me in, or saw me wearing an SS uniform, they didn't dare to ask me for help, and they all kept their distance.The first time I did it myself.As a doctor, the only man here, how can I watch patients, ladies, mothers who have just accomplished the greatest work of mankind moaning in pain beside me and not help?Since I can put aside everything and take good care of Yu, I can also put down my body and help other mothers in need.

This is a noisy large ward. There are seventeen new mothers or mothers-to-be who are struggling to give birth to a new life. During the day, their family members come and go, anxious, excited, and their husbands who can't keep their mouths shut with smirks; Tired, happy, sweet goddess-like wife; relatives and friends who sincerely wish and see hope again; and those pink, precious, and lovely angels.I was among them, and gradually, I had a new perception and understanding of life, mother, and love.

There was a father who came back from the battlefield, hurried to the hospital on the fourth day after the child was born, and saw his infant daughter.

The father was very young, tall, and generous.The nurse handed the baby to him, but he didn't dare to pick it up. He rubbed his hands and held back for a long time, and finally took it with a blushing face, but he was too stiff to move.Fortunately, the baby fell asleep, neither crying nor fussing, smacking his lips sweetly, and the father stared at the baby greedily for a long time.He lifted the swaddle with his hands stiffly, and lowered his head at the same time.He must have wanted to kiss his daughter, but he was so nervous that he tried hard for a long time but failed to kiss.

The young wife sitting on the bed laughed at him and reached out to take the baby. The sweaty husband was finally relieved, but his eyes were always on his daughter.The husband sat on the edge of the bed and stretched out his thick fingers, wanting to touch the baby's face, her small nose, or her long eyelashes, but he dared not touch the baby after stretching out his fingers for a long time, and finally retracted them.

Before I knew it, my eyes were dazzled.

Yu La pulls my sleeve.I bent down and kissed her hand. "Sorry, I'm going out for a while."

I went to smoke on the balcony at the end of the corridor. This is the only place where smoking is allowed in the maternity ward. During the day, there are always people.When I smoked the second cigarette, the young father also came to enjoy it. He lit his cigarette and walked straight to me like an old acquaintance.

"Congratulations! Your daughter is beautiful," I said.

He smiled innocently, his eyes full of happiness. "Thanks! You will too, man, your wife is beautiful, and you will have healthy, beautiful children. Children are everything."

Yu also woke up after helping the patient next door to the toilet, and she also wanted to go to the toilet.As usual, I carefully picked her up and went out carefully.After going to the toilet, Yu wanted to sit on the chair by the corridor for a while.I sat next to her and let her lean against me.

"What time is it?" Jade asked.

"04:30, it will be dawn in a while."

"Did you book a hotel in Berlin this time?"

"Yes, I called the Kempinski Hotel and they reserved a room for me."

"Then when my aunt comes in the morning, you can go back and rest."

"Ok."

"I mean really go back to rest and sleep."

For three days, I was in the hospital almost all the time, except for a few hours every day when Yu's aunt came to deliver meals, and that was to inquire about the situation with the German branch of the International Red Cross.Yu never asked, but like Zhao, she knew everything.

"Okay, I'll go back to rest, sleep, and come back at night."

"Don't come in a hurry, get a good night's sleep. You see, I'm much better, and there's nothing wrong with me."

"You don't want to see me?"

"Where, if I don't have you these days..." Yu shook his head.

"Zhao entrusted you to me, I should..."

Yu suddenly turned his head to look at me, put his index finger on my lips.After a while, she put her hands down and rested her head on my chest. "sorry."

"Why are you apologizing?"

"You know I often see you as him, thinking he's here, thinking he's taking care of me, and I numb myself, forgive myself, and make you...sorry."

"It's nothing, it's what I want, but I can't be as good as him."

"No, you are as good as him, you are very similar."

"No way." I deliberately laughed out loud, and quietly changed the concept of "like".

The girl straightened up slowly and looked up at me. "It's really similar." Her eyes flicked across my face. "We have a trick in drawing pictures. You can't use black to draw black hair. Similarly, you can't use gold to draw blond hair. Do you know why?"

"Because there is light, it is natural and real."

"Yes, the sun gives color to everything, and color is a feeling. You guys are getting closer to me, no matter whether the hair is blond or black, the eyes are black or blue, they are more and more alike."

I laughed again, not on purpose this time. "I didn't expect you to quibble."

Yu also laughed. "Of course, I study philosophy."

I listened to Yu and went back to sleep.Although it is true that there is no sleepiness, this situation itself is not normal.After confirming Zhao's bad news, I fell ill and fainted. Fortunately, Walter rescued me in time.He saw the newspaper first and hid it all. He was still worried and followed me all the time.These days, I have been taking medicine, otherwise I am afraid I would have collapsed long ago.

I push open the large glass doors on Coudamm Street and step into The Oak, the bar at the Kempinski Hotel in Bristol.It was morning, and breakfast was served in the oak room.

"Good morning, Baron... It's been a while... Would you like something to eat? The same?... Please wait a moment."

The waiters are very welcoming.Ah, it's an old face. I used to work with William. It was evening, but now I changed to morning shift.I was thinking wildly and didn't intend to ask clearly.All of a sudden, I felt extremely tired, dizzy, sore, and I had no strength to hold my coffee cup.

There are not many customers in the restaurant, and the waiter is relatively free. He seems to have something to do, and he always looks at me.I simply called him over.

"Can you get me a brandy?"

The waiter was stunned for a moment, then smiled and said, "Of course, come right away."

I mixed some brandy with my coffee and drank it in one gulp.The waiter immediately poured the coffee, followed my example and added brandy, and I felt much better after a couple of glasses.

"What's your name?" I asked.

He poured me a third cup of coffee and stood aside respectfully. "Anton, Baron."

"I remember you used to work with William."

"Yes, Baron, you have a good memory."

It was just a while ago, I smiled. "Why, you changed to the morning shift now? Tips are not much for this class."

"Yes...but...I still..."

"What's wrong?" There must be something wrong with him.I think.I leaned back in my chair, made myself more comfortable, and looked out the large glass window at the street.

Busy traffic on the street, Xixi shouting.At some point, the scene in front of him turned gray and dark, and the noise gradually faded away, leaving only Anton's answer.

"It's William, Baron. We've had a class for a long time, and now that he's gone, I don't want to be in that class anymore."

"Not anymore?"

"Yes, he enlisted."

"Conscripted? Isn't he disabled?"

"I have a disability, but the doctor at the physical examination said that the disability is not serious and I can join the army."

"When did this happen?"

"last week."

"Last week? The day he came to see me..." I thought about the whole thing.

"You are a good man, Baron. We know that you are a SS doctor. Your certificate may be useful to William, so he came to you..."

"And he didn't say anything?"

"I don't know why he didn't say it. He bought that bottle of wine on purpose. He said you like that bottle of wine, but that bottle of wine is very expensive."

"I know...I know..." I muttered to myself, and scenes of that day flashed before my eyes.I leaned against the table, propping my forehead with my hands.That day, knowing that Yu was pregnant and they had a child, I was devastated and in pain, turning a blind eye to everything around me.William came to me, obviously in need of help, but I wanted to tip him 200 marks.Just imagine how it is possible for a self-respecting person to make a request to a high-ranking, arrogant, and indifferent master?He must be very disappointed. It turned out that what I said about him as a friend was a lie. I am hypocritical, selfish, cruel, and arrogant. I am such a person.

"Does he have any relatives?" I wish there was at least something left to do.

Anton lowered his head and remained silent for a while before opening his mouth with difficulty. "Yes, he has a sister. His sister is beautiful, very beautiful, but a fool."

"What!" I stared at Anton in astonishment, nothing worse.

"Yes," Anton raised his head, eyes full of anger and sadness. "His sister was only 16 years old, and they depended on each other. He was suddenly notified to enlist in the army, and he passed the medical examination. He realized that it must be related to his sister. After he left, no one could protect his sister anymore, but he didn't Know who it is. William has no money and status, he asked the manager for help, but the manager didn't know how big the man behind the scenes was, and then we gave him advice to come to you... His disability is real, he should not be drafted enlist."

"And now? Where is his sister now?"

"It was taken away."

"Took away?"

"On the second day after William left, someone came to the door and took his sister away. The reason is that the fool without a guardian is taken over by the state."

I can't find it anymore.I realized that William's sister was never to be found again.Like Natalie, I said yes to Kristen but wasn't sure I'd find her.Maybe it can't be better, there is hope without news.Hope, is it self-deception, or is it firm and tenacious?My Zhao, can I still find it?I went to the Red Cross every day, waiting for Yu's uncle to bring back any news from the embassy, ​​and at the same time I was so scared.Fear, deep-rooted fear, when will we be truly free.