father - home

The next night, I didn't go to lab work and didn't sleep well.The whole night, I tossed and turned in bed, when I was awake, in my dreams, with my eyes open or closed, there was always that figure shaking.Green, white, gray, bathed in morning glow or covered in blood.From an officer in the Wehrmacht to a prisoner in a concentration camp, the change was too great for someone who barely knew me, let alone himself.How much did he bear?Can he take it?What on earth is his heart made of so that he can always maintain that calmness, that pride, and always have that reassuring smile on his face.

In a daze, I jumped up suddenly, my mind immediately cleared up, I quickly put on my clothes, rushed to the window, opened the window and looked down. (Last night, I intentionally did not draw the curtains.) My dormitory is on the second floor. Looking out from the window, I can clearly see the gates of the two dormitory buildings, the iron gate leading to the playground, and the playground on the other side of the iron fence. clearly.

Fortunately, it's not too late.The Chinese are walking towards the sentinel in front of the iron gate, standing at attention, bowing their heads, saluting, holding their hats with both hands to their chests.Although he was also wearing a gray striped prison uniform, although the thin prison uniform was not enough to resist the cold outside, the gray figure did not tremble and his back did not bend.

The sentinel looked him up and down, and seemed to smile. Fortunately, he didn't make things difficult for him, so he opened the iron gate and let him pass.Then, like yesterday, he slowly walked straight through the middle of the empty playground.

At this time, on the opposite side of the playground, above the barracks, a white belly appeared, and then the whole sky lit up, dyed a layer of bright red.Gradually, the orange glow filled the entire concentration camp, and he in the middle of the playground was bathed in the first ray of morning light again.

Standing in front of the window, he and I were bathed in the same glow.Facing the morning glow, I also raised my head high, half closed my eyes, and took a deep breath.The coat slipped off my shoulders without me noticing.The sun is shining, like gentle fingers caressing my cheek; jumping, like a winter bonfire lighting up my heart.

Watching the sunrise is not only a sensory pleasure, but also a spiritual experience; it is not only a compliment to nature, but also a collision between nature and life.At this special moment of the day, I met him, greeted the dawn together, met the sun once, and accepted the baptism of the sun, so as to endow life with new meaning, new revelation and new value.

In my life, how many times can I have the experience of bathing in the morning light?How many opportunities like this have I created?

At this moment, I may be curled up in the quilt, sleeping with my head covered, or snoring indifferently, dreaming a dream that I will forget when I wake up.That morning light does not reach me, neither my body nor my soul.

On the third day, I woke up at three o'clock in the morning.With the lights off, I moved a chair to sit in front of the window, and covered myself and the chair with thick curtains.The moonlight was like silver, and there were still lights on in the courtyard. It would be too strange for the sentinel standing guard in front of the iron gate to see me like this.

The cover was tight, and the surroundings were silent, only the sound of my own heartbeat and breathing could be heard.I opened the windows so that any noise in the yard could be heard clearly, even if it was a stray cat slipping under the window.After a while, I felt cold, so I put on my coat and hat.But it was still cold, my hands and feet were numb, I trembled slightly unconsciously, and my heart ached.

I waited, anxious, uneasy.

Time passed so slowly, almost to a standstill.The moon had gone down, and the pre-dawn darkness seemed endless.

"Crack... squeak... ah..."

The opening of the door was very soft, and any other sound would have drowned it out.I hurriedly stood up, opened the curtains and looked out, and saw the door of the opposite dormitory building open, and a person came out, standing under the streetlight on the porch.

"God!" My eyes were dark, I quickly grabbed the window frame, closed my eyes, collected myself, opened it and looked again: it was him, indeed a Chinese, a gray, thin figure.He came out of the SS dormitory, at dawn, every day.There are many SS soldiers living in that building, and the dormitory of Lieutenant Will Schenk is also there...

I couldn't breathe, my whole body was shaking, and my heart was getting more and more painful.No, I feel my legs are weak, my body is shaking, and I can't stand anymore.I have to sit down, or lie down, lie down on the bed, sleep with my head covered, and wake up and nothing has happened, nothing has been seen.what am i doingWhat am I waiting for?Waiting to verify what?Yes, between me and him, the Chinese, is a chaotic and delicate world, indescribable, very fragile, like a noble crystal, a flash of thought, a look is enough to shatter it.Is the crystal broken now?Do I want it to shatter, or not?Why should my heart ache if I want it to break?If not, why should I wait?

I feel like I'm split.

A voice said: Don't look, go away, get away from the window.Go back, go back to normal life.It's over, it's time to end, it's not too late, it's still too late.For three days, you have been absent-minded, restless and sleepless.It's dangerous, it's too dangerous, don't forget where you are.Concentration camps, lunatic asylums, the prisoners are lunatics, the guards are lunatics, all are lunatics.What else can you expect from this bunch of lunatics?what to expectIt's lucky not to be crazy.

But the eyes don't listen, it doesn't seem to grow on the same body as the brain.It watched him greedily and fascinatedly—the Chinese, never leaving for a moment.It follows him, follows his figure, follows his footsteps, drives back the night, ushers in the dawn, bathes in the morning glow, accepts baptism, and guards the flag for him when the morning light sprinkles the pure and proud life.