withered color

The next afternoon, Chen Yan and Xu Liangyun set foot on the way back to his house.

Xu Liangyun's home is in Liangcheng, but it's not in the city center. It's in the north city, which is the coldest part of Liangcheng in winter.

They didn't take the dog with them.Chen Yanben was still hesitant to take the dog with him, but Xuanzheng contacted him that night and asked him when he would take Pudding and Xiao Ming out to play.

Chen Yan said that he might have to go out recently, and he didn't have much time.Xuanzheng said that was just right, give me the pudding, let it stay with Xiao Ming, and you can go out without worry.

It was also for Chen Yan to think about it, after all, it would be inconvenient to bring pudding with him when he went to see Xu Liangyun's father.

So he went to ask Pudding for his opinion.

After Pudding also expressed that he wanted to find Xiaoming, the next morning, the two excrement shovelers made an appointment again, and Chen Yan sent Pudding out.

"I'll keep it in the club, don't worry, it will be with my Xiao Ming." Xuanzheng said, "When will you come back?"

"I'll be back in two days, just go home to see my parents and grandma." Chen Yan said.

Xuanzheng nodded, said yes, and then led Pudding away.

Xu Liangyun called his mother the night before, and Chen Yan leaned beside him to listen.

His mother couldn't believe it at first, but later she was a little flattered.After responding in a panic on the phone a few times, he said that he would clean up the house immediately, and then hung up the phone in a hurry.

The phone was hung up, Xu Liangyun had no choice but to turn around and say to Chen Yan: "She also thinks I'm sorry for you."

"...Don't be sorry."

The next morning, the two went out to buy a lot of things and planned to take them home to Xu Liangyun's parents.

After eating at noon and resting for an hour, the two drove back to his house.

Liangcheng is not a small city.It takes more than an hour and a half to drive from where they are to where Xu Liangyun's father is.

The car started, and the street lights outside the window slowly retreated with the speed of the car.

Chen Yan looked out of the car window and slowly sank into memories.

That was in his senior year, many years ago.Probably eight years ago, or nine years ago, maybe seven years ago.

The statement is tired of not remembering clearly, and I am too lazy to count it on my fingers. After all, it is obviously meaningless to worry about the number of years.

All in all, Xu Liangyun said he loved him for the first time that year, and then took him home on the weekend.

Xu Liangyun said that he had talked to his mother, and went to talk to his father with his mother. He felt that he wanted to bring Chen Chen home to meet his parents, because he wanted to have a future with him.

Chen Yan followed him home.

At that time, they didn't have a car, and they hadn't graduated from the school, and they were dizzy with their graduation every day in their senior year.Xu Liangyun is not a captain, but a small special police officer who is quite prominent in the special police team.

At that time, there was nothing, so they took the bus and walked bumpily all the way to Xu Liangyun's father.

Xu Liangyun's itinerary at that time was very strange. He took a taxi to a bus stop with Chen Yan, and then took the bus there.

Statement Yan was very strange and asked him: "Why don't you just take a taxi to your house?"

"Before going to my house, go and see my dad." Xu Liangyun answered him, "He's in a remote place, and taxis don't usually like to go there."

"...Do your parents live together?"

Xu Liangyun nodded.After nodding, he paused again and shook his head.

"It's subtle."

He said.

Until the bus arrived at the terminal, Chen Yan didn't understand what this subtlety meant.

Until the car arrived at the terminal, the broadcast said "the terminal 'Northern Suburb Cemetery' has arrived".

Until Xu Liangyun led him into the cemetery, and walked to a tombstone with black and white photos.

The tombstone is black, larger and more imposing than the others.On the stele is written Xu Yizhuo, above is the word martyr, and on both sides are two rows of inscriptions, which read "The martyr mourns for the people's eternal life, the body of steel blocks the fire and fights the flames", and there is a posthumous photo in the center of the stele. black cloth.

The person in the posthumous photo is an imposing policeman, who looks very similar to Xu Liangyun when he smiles.

Statement tired speechless.

He looked at the tombstone.There are still many small characters on the tombstone, writing his life.

Xu Yizhuo died 14 years ago.

At that time, Chen Yan's mind was very confused, and he stroked it hard for a long time before he figured out that Xu Liangyun was only about seven or eight years old.

Xu Liangyun squatted down and put the white chrysanthemum bought near the entrance of the cemetery in front of the tombstone.

"My dad died to save people." He said, "14 years ago, a bank was robbed. The robber didn't say that he left a bomb in the bank. It was my dad who found it suddenly. The hostages were released, and there were many people in the hall, but there was less than half a minute left in the countdown, and everyone had no time to run, so after he yelled, he ran into the bank in the opposite direction with the bomb in his arms... The bank vault is big, he Just think about throwing it in, and it can block the impact of the explosion."

"...It turned out that he didn't have time. He just threw it in, and the moment the broken thing left his hand..."

After Xu Liangyun finished speaking, he lowered his head and stopped talking.Maybe it’s because I can’t go on, or maybe I don’t want to talk anymore.

He squatted in front of the grave and remained silent for a while.

It was late autumn at that time, and the dry breath of autumn was blown by the wind, which made people's throat dry, and even Xu Liangyun's back looked very lonely.

Chen Yan stood behind Xu Liangyun, silent for a moment, then walked forward, and slowly squatted down beside Xu Liangyun.

As soon as the statement came over, Xu Liangyun let out a sigh of relief, slowly raised his head, and looked at the portrait.

Xu Liangyun said, "Dad, this is my boyfriend."

The northern suburbs cemetery in February was colder than I remembered.

The two held hands, each holding two bouquets of flowers, and walked on the road.

They walked to Xu Liangyun's father's grave.

The monument is still the same as in the memory of the statement.On the black and white portrait, Xu Yizhuo's smile still resembled Xu Liangyun's, his smile was like a scorching sun.

Xu Liangyun squatted down, put Baiju in front of the grave, and said in a muffled voice, "Dad."

The winter wind is colder and colder, as cold as a bone, and the moment the words are spoken, the wind blows them into a long white air.

Chen Yan also squatted down, and then put a bunch of flowers in his hand in front of the grave, leaving a bunch of flowers in his hand.

The two squatted side by side, Xu Liangyun was silent for a long time.

Chen Yan turned his head to look at him, and saw that he was looking at the black and white portrait, his eyes were calm and deep, as if he was really looking at the person on the portrait.

"……dad."

Xu Liangyun called him again.

The two squatted in front of the monument, the hair on their foreheads was blowing mercilessly by the wind.

"I got back together with him," Xu Liangyun said looking at the portrait, "After wandering around, I ended up looking for him."

"Didn't I answer a report call at home on New Year's Eve... There was a serial murder case in Liangcheng, which was linked to him. There were a lot of things going on, and you might laugh at me when you talk about it, but I just... ...Or, ran to his side."

"Don't think too much, I caught him. The murderer is a manager of a gallery, and his psychology is a little abnormal."

"You also know that I'm sick. I've been cured recently. The doctor said that thanks to him, I can stop the medicine and try tomorrow. I recently asked for leave for treatment. I've been at home all the time, thinking about being idle is also idle. , I’ll take him home and tell you, and I’ll go back and talk to my mother later.”

After Xu Liangyun said this, he didn't say any more.

He slowly lowered his head and looked at the flowers in front of the tomb.

Xu Liangyun was silent for a long time.

After a long time, Xu Liangyun said, "Dad."

"I actually... I just realized now that I've been wrong all along."

"All these years, all I think is to make him hate me. I always think, he hates me, find someone else, don't think about me again in this life, that's all. I know it's just me I am escaping, I dare not face it, but even if I dare not face it, it is true that he entered the ICU because of me."

"But I found out that I was wrong. I was sick, and he had the courage to run to save me, but I only had the courage to escape myself."

"...I had a dream a few days ago. In the dream, you told me that the police would stand in front of everyone. I also dreamed that after you died, many people cried and told me that you were a hero. Tell me not to hate you... In fact, I wouldn't hate you if I didn't say that, I know you are a hero."

"When you were young, you said you were a policeman, and you told me about your going to work. When I was young, I thought, I will be a policeman in the future, and I also want to be a hero."

"But I know I can't catch up with you in my life. I'm like this...I'm sorry for everyone. I really, I can't bear to see me like this. In fact, sometimes I don't know whether I should be a policeman or not. "

"I'm not a hero," he said, "I'm never going to be a hero in my life."

Statement Yan opened his mouth to retort: ​​"You are."

Xu Liangyun paused.

Statement tired of looking away, looking at the black and white portrait on the monument.

"You are a hero." Statement Yan said, "I almost died twice, but you saved me. You are the child of a hero, and you are a hero."

Xu Liangyun was speechless, looking at him speechless.

After a moment, he laughed.This voice sounded like self-mockery, comfort, and helplessness. All in all, there were too many things in it.

Xu Liangyun said: "Probably I am to you."

After staying in front of the tomb for half a day, the two got up and left.

Xu Liangyun originally wanted to leave the cemetery with Statement Grief, but Statement Grief led him to the other side.

Xu Liangyun was stunned: "Aren't you leaving?"

"Don't go," said Chen Yan, "look at my grandma."

Xu Liangyun was stunned.

He looked at the statement, and then at the flowers in his hand that he bought two for some reason, but only took out one just now.

Statement Yan looked at him calmly.

Xu Liangyun seemed to finally understand, he looked at Chen Yan in disbelief, his pupils trembling: "No..."

"Died three years ago."

Chen Yan said to him: "Cancer, I took care of it for a year, but it was useless. The money was spent, but there was no way, I still couldn't keep it...no one could keep it."

The wind of February sneaked past with a bone-chilling chill, and Chen Yan saw Xu Liangyun's eyes trembling as if the earth was shaking, and an apology that could almost push a person to his knees.

Chen Yan smiled wryly, and the laughter became white.

"Didn't you ask me why I didn't go back to my grandma's house during the New Year?...Because there is no more." Chen Yan said to him, "I said it too... I will really depend on you from now on."

"I only have you."