growing up porcelain doll

◎On the way out of the cemetery, Gong Qing's mood gradually calmed down, and he seemed to have figured it out a bit, his feelings are actually a burden to everyone...◎

On the way out of the cemetery, Gong Qing's mood gradually calmed down. He seemed to understand that his feelings are actually a burden to everyone. Once exposed, it may cause disastrous consequences to the family. The consequences of redemption, this consequence is something he can't bear and doesn't want to see, so he can only hide this feeling well.If sacrificing his own happiness can keep the happiness of everyone in the family, then it is worth it, and he will be happy too.

He can't be with his elder brother, but he will always be with his elder brother. If they can't be lovers, they will always be relatives, they will always be by each other's side, it doesn't matter.As for the elder brother will find a girlfriend and get married in the future... Although just thinking about these things makes my heart ache and uncomfortable, but there will always be such a day in the future, then stay away from the life of the elder brother and watch from afar They can live happily, maybe he will feel happy too.

When he arrived at the gate, Gong Qing saw his elder brother standing there waiting for him under the big cypress tree. He looked at his straight and slender figure with the corners of his lips slightly raised. He strode forward and hooked his elder brother's arm, and called One voice: "Brother."

Cheng Yu glanced back at him, touched the red and swollen corners of his eyes, and said, "Have you been crying? Are you feeling better?"

Gong Qing smiled lightly and said, "Well, it's much better."

Cheng Yu held Gong Qing's hand spontaneously, and said as he walked, "That's good, if you miss my aunt and uncle in the future, just tell me, I'll accompany you to see them, don't hold it in your heart and do nothing Said, seeing you can't eat and sleep all day long, it makes people feel uncomfortable."

Gong Qing felt that his nose was sore again. He tried his best to restrain his emotions, and held his elder brother's hand tighter. He nodded and said, "Thank you brother, I have worried you for a while."

"What else do we need to say thank you, I'm your brother, I should help you solve the problem, and you should fully believe that your brother has the ability to help you solve the problem, it is not stupid to have a brother who does not rely on it!"

After Gong Qing heard this, a warm current flowed into her heart.His eldest brother is just too kind to him, thinking about him in everything, and taking care of him in everything, how can such a relationship live up to it?He can't let those who love him fall into a dilemma, so try to restrain himself from being just a good brother to the big brother.

He smiled wryly and replied: "Well, remember, my brother is omnipotent."

"That's right!" Cheng Yu's heart that has been tense these days has finally relaxed at this moment. His wish is very simple, as long as his relatives are happy and happy, he will be satisfied, especially this younger brother, he wants to give him every possible care She cared for him and wanted to hold up a protective umbrella for him.

He knew how hard Gong Qing had been before the age of seven, so during these ten years, he tried his best to give him more warmth and care.Whether he wanted to make up for that fall into the water, or because ten years of getting along had made him develop such a habit, he always hoped that his younger brother would have a better life and be happier, so he should take care of him more.Since he grew up, he spent most of his time and energy on his younger brother besides studying. In fact, he also couldn't figure it out. As a younger sister, or his own sister, he was not so strong. He has a strong sense of responsibility and mission, but he cares very much about this younger brother who is not related by blood, and he doesn't think there is anything wrong with it, anyway, he will do what he thinks.

After returning home from the cemetery, Gong Qing's mentality seemed to be calmer. He didn't want to be a burden to others, so he had to work harder to change himself. If time couldn't let him let go of his feelings for his elder brother, then He can only go far away.It suddenly occurred to him that during the summer vacation last year, his elder brother asked him to get admitted to University A of Wushi, and he agreed without hesitation. In the past six months, he had set University A of Wushi as his goal. Now it seems that this goal seems a bit difficult. It lasted.In fact, he really wants to go to the same school as his elder brother, eat together when there are no classes, go to school, and go out to play. The longer we stay together, the more reluctant we may be to leave in the future.

These days, Gong Qing would think that the time to be so close to her eldest brother should be less and less, and the unrestrained life would be less and less every day, so his eyes would always unconsciously stick to the figure of the eldest brother, even though sometimes He wanted to go up and give him a hug, but he tried his best to hold back. He was like an obedient child, dutifully playing the role of a good brother.

When Cheng Yu left, Cheng Yue gave each of them a small ornament, which was a Q-version picture of her brothers and herself that she drew during the Chinese New Year and then customized a schoolbag pendant on a certain treasure. She handed the small gift to When it was given to Gong Qing, her face was still slightly red.Cheng Yu looked at it and said with a smile, "Why are you so shy to give a gift?"

Cheng Yue, who was already a little guilty, suddenly became even more embarrassed. She stared at Cheng Yu and said, "Brother, why are you so annoying!"

Cheng Yu sighed and said, "Oh, I know I'm shy, it seems that you have really grown up."

"It's as if you pulled me up with shit and pee." Cheng Yue rolled his eyes.

Cheng Yu clicked his tongue: "Did you forget that when you were a child, you let me feed you, let me put you to sleep, let me carry you out to play, and chased after my ass all day long? What's the difference between me and me pulling you?" ?”

Cheng Yue curled her lips and fell silent.

Gong Qing wanted to laugh when she saw the two of them arguing. Anyway, no matter what they were doing, they had to argue for a few words. They were really natural enemies.He took the human-shaped pendant in the elder brother's hand, smiled and said, "Brother, let me hang it up for you."

Cheng Yu turned around and turned the schoolbag to him. After hanging it up, he admired it and said, "It's pretty pretty!"

"That's right, it doesn't matter who painted it!" Cheng Yue said triumphantly.

Cheng Yu pinched her face and said with a smile, "Yes, yes, my sister is the most capable!"

After the two had finished their fight, Cheng Yu turned around and hugged Gong Qing. Gong Qing was stunned for a moment, her heart beating faster unconsciously, and after a while, his hands slowly hugged the elder brother's back.I only heard the elder brother's voice ringing in my ears: "You have worked very hard, don't always work so hard, take care of yourself!"

Gong Qing felt that her eyes were a little wet. It turned out that all the changes in him during this holiday were seen by her elder brother. While his eyes followed her elder brother, his eyes never left him. Such silent attention really made people feel very warm.He tightened his arms and replied, "Brother, I will."

After finishing speaking, Cheng Yu let go of him, and said goodbye to them with a smile: "Okay, I'm leaving, see you in summer vacation!"

After school started, life became busy again. In the second semester of the second year of high school, many students began to prepare to participate in various competitions in the second half of the year, especially the science key class. There are more subjects that can participate in the competition, so those students with top grades will make comprehensive preparations .

In fact, the courses of their class have already been almost completed, and the rest is endless review. For those students who are going to participate in the competition, the school has also specially organized training courses for different competitions to provide them with the best teaching resources. One year is the hardest year for all students.

As the weather got hotter and hotter, those competition classes started one by one. When studying at night, more than half of the students in the classroom were not in the classroom. Even Hu Cong, who was inseparable from him all day long, disappeared into his classroom for a long time. In view.Gradually, some students not only have to attend training courses on campus, but also to off-campus training courses. Of course, only those students who are particularly outstanding and have a solid curriculum foundation will be granted leave by the school. They still have to go back to school for exams.

Slowly, several empty tables became vacant in the classroom. For the sake of aesthetics, the class teacher moved those seats that had been vacant for a long time to the back.

Gong Qing was replaced by a gentle and quiet girl named Xiaoya. Although Class 1 is a key class in science, there are also classes in the key class that are from the bottom. Although Xiaoya may not be the bottom one, but in such a class where the average IQ is higher than hers, she really can't use any "phoenix". A tail is always better than a chicken's head" to comfort myself.The feeling of being crushed by a master for a long time is really frustrating. Even if I work hard, even if I beat the students in the ordinary class by several blocks, I will still crush the students who are only [-] or so away from the first place in the grade. A little sense of superiority, and then the fragile self-esteem that was severely crushed.

Gong Qing is not a cold and rigid person. Although he is not particularly active, he will definitely participate in any activities in the class as long as someone calls him. If anyone has any questions, he will take the trouble to answer them. A good-tempered person People with good personalities are welcome everywhere.However, maybe it was because the learning tasks suddenly increased after school started, maybe it was because there were fewer students in the class and it was a little deserted, or maybe it was because of the torment of the messy things for half a year that the people in the class became much quieter, and he himself Also quiet a lot.

Xiaoya is usually under a lot of pressure. Now that she is at the same table with the senior boss, the senior boss has changed his temper. She only feels that the pressure on herself is even greater, and even when she sees Gong Qing's expressionless face. She wondered if she had a zombie face because her grades were so poor that she couldn't meet the Fayan at the same table. Thinking of this, she became more cautious.

One day during the big class break, it was raining heavily outside and it was impossible to run exercises. The students in Class 1 basically lay on their desks to catch up on sleep.Gong Qing was holding the water glass and was going to the front to get a glass of water. Seeing that Xiaoya's glass was also empty, she asked by the way, "Do you drink water?"

Xiaoya was writing a math paper that had just been handed out, and when she heard the sound, she looked up at the cold face of her deskmate, and let out a bewildered "ah".

Gong Qing was suddenly amused by her expression. After a chuckle, she pointed to the empty water glass on her table and asked again: "Do you want to get a glass of water for you?"

"Oh, okay, thank you." This is the first time Xiaoya and Gong Qing have seen him smile since they are at the same table these days. I don't know if it's because the smile is too good-looking or because I was too stupid just now, Xiaoya looked at him. Time's cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

Gong Qing returned to her seat with two glasses filled with water, put the Xiaoya one on her table, saw that her ears were still red, and asked, "What's wrong with you?"

Xiaoya's heartbeat, which had been suppressed just now, began to beat wildly again, and she didn't know why she was so nervous when facing Gong Qing.She replied with some embarrassment: "Well, it's nothing, I just think it's a surprise that you helped me fetch water."

Gong Qing was stunned for a moment, then chuckled: "It's no surprise, I used to help Hu Cong fetch water before, it's just a matter of being at the same table."

"Oh," Xiaoya felt relieved seeing that he could talk and laugh to herself now, she muttered softly, "I thought you hated sitting with me."

Although her voice was very low, Gong Qing still heard her.Gong Qing felt a little surprised, and asked again: "Why do you think so?"

Hearing Gong Qing's question, Xiaoya felt even more embarrassed, she almost wanted to slap herself for not being able to control her mouth so much, but when she looked up and saw Gong Qing looking straight into his eyes, she couldn't avoid it , then bit the bullet and said: "When Hu Cong was here, I felt that you had a good relationship and you were quite talkative, but after the two of us were at the same table, you didn't seem to talk much, and you talked all day long. There is no expression, I thought you thought my grades were not good and you didn't want to be at the same table with me."

The more she said this, the lower her voice became, until finally, Xiaoya's blushing face was almost pressed against the table.

In No. [-] Middle School, no one can compare their family conditions, but no matter which class they are in, everyone will compare their studies and grades. Even if the teacher does not deliberately make comparisons, it is good for students with strong self-motivation and self-esteem. , they will unconsciously compare themselves with better people.Those students with particularly good grades not only made them look up to them, but also made them feel a little bit ashamed in front of them, especially this kind of feeling is more subtle in the same class.

Gong Qing never thought that she could bring this kind of psychological pressure to others, so she didn't know what to say for a while, so she paused for a while before saying: "Don't think so much, besides, you can be in Class 1 It’s not bad in itself.” But he recalled roughly, it seems that since Xiaoya came to their class, her grades have always been at the bottom of the class, so it seems that she really understands her low self-esteem.

But then again, Class 1 is a key class. When you are studying, others are also studying, and when you are working hard, other people are also working hard. Therefore, every time you rank in the big test, the grades of Class 1 students are the most stable. Everyone There are no more than three ups and downs.

Even though Gong Qing felt that even if Xiaoya was at the bottom of class 1, it would not be a problem for her to get a higher grade based on her grades, and she shouldn't be so inferior, he still said: "If you think there is any difficulty in studying, you can ask me. He glanced at the math paper that Xiaoya made just now, took a pen and tapped on her paper and said, "Look at this question, although you are correct in solving it this way, but if there are too many steps, the speed of solving the problem will be slow. Let me tell you a simple one, which can save half the amount of calculations, so that writing questions can be done faster." Then he wrote on the draft paper while speaking.