but you never loved me

Ning Yi didn't know what happened to Yan Zimu, so he subconsciously took his phone to look at it.But Yan Zimu tugged his hand very tightly, and Ning Yi tugged again, and he slammed his hand away.When he raised his head, his face was a little tired, he didn't look at Ning Yi, he just shifted the car from P gear to D gear.

When I got home, it was already dark.There were still Ning Yi's unfinished dishes in the kitchen, but they were completely cold, and the two people in the room had no appetite at all.

Yan Zimu stood on the balcony and reached out to open the window.The bitter cold wind blew in, and it hurt like a knife on the face.He looked at a certain tree outside the window, a leaf fell to the ground with the wind, and his heart gradually became calm.

Turning around, he inadvertently saw Ning Yi's cigarettes on the table. He walked over and took one and held it between his fingers.Following Ning Yi's example, he lit it and put it in his mouth to suck.The strong smell rushed into his throat in an instant, causing him to bend over and cough violently, even tears came out.

Ning Yi hugged him from behind, patted his back lightly, and frowned tightly.When Yan Zimu's cough stopped so badly, he slowly let go.Yan Zimu grabbed his hand, turned around and said, "Ning Yi, let's talk."

There were still some smoked tears in his eyes, his eyes were clear and bright, making Ning Yi momentarily in a trance.When he recovered, he was about to speak when Yan Zimu had let go of his hand and sat on the sofa.

He took a sip of water before he said, "Ning Yi, I just want to ask you why." Ning Yi stood beside the bed without looking at him, he knew that Yan Zimu was staring at him, his eyes were like torches, which made him uncomfortable. Dare to look directly.

Yan Zimu didn't have that much patience anymore, he asked again: "Ning Yi, why?" Ning Yi looked down at him, his eyes were gloomy, like the moonlight in the mist. T3

His face was calm, but he smiled inwardly.What should he say, that he is afraid that he will not be able to keep him?Or is it a self-righteous feeling that if he keeps getting sick, he will have more pity for himself?

Yan Zimu actually knew it in his heart, he just couldn't believe that Ning Yi would really do this.But think about it, is there anything Ning Yi can't do now?

He smiled and asked the true suspicion in his heart: "Ning Yi, you know in your heart that no matter how long you delay, I will leave you one day. What are you going to do then? Are you going to die quietly alone? ?”

Hearing this, Ning Yi trembled all over, then walked up to Yan Zimu.Kneeling down and gently touching the corner of Yan Zimu's mouth, even though there was an obvious mocking smile on the other's face.

He looked into Yan Zimu's eyes, as if he caught something in them.So he also smiled, very softly: "Zi Mu, if you don't love me anymore, what does my death have to do with you?"

When the words fell, the smile on Yan Zimu's face disappeared.He looked at Ning Yi and said indifferently: "Ning Yi, I'm just..."

Ning Yi lowered his head and interrupted him with a chuckle: "It's just what? It's just pity for me? No need, if you still think of me occasionally after I die, I'm already very satisfied."

Yan Zimu's hand unconsciously pulled the sofa cushion tightly, wrinkling the front of it.He kept warning himself that this was a trick Ning Yi had set for him, to prevent him from softening his heart.But when he thought of the scene this person said, his heart began to throb.

After a long time, he pulled Ning Yi's hand from his face, and looked at Ning Yi with a trace of compromise in his eyes: "What exactly do you want?"

Looking at his tired face, Ning Yi began to regret what she said to him just now.He knelt in front of Yan Zimu, stretched out his hand to gently smooth his frowning brows, lowered his eyes and said with a humble attitude: "I just want you to be by my side forever, is that okay?"

Yan Zimu looked at him and asked him: "Ning Yi, do we have to torture each other? Why can't we get well?" Ning Yi smiled and said softly: "I'm sorry for making you uncomfortable. But for me "He said softly in his heart, it has never been a torture for me, you are the only warm sunshine in my dark life.

Yan Zimu raised his hand to push him away, but his hand stopped in mid-air. In the end, he just closed his eyes helplessly, and let Ning Yi press a kiss on his forehead.His heart was inexplicably heavy, but he seemed relieved about some things.

He thought that he and Ning Yi might be like two trees whose branches were intertwined, and they couldn't figure it out. They might never be able to escape in this life.So what else?We can only take one step at a time.

————————————————————

Yan Zimu's thoughts were all on Ning Yi. He took Ning Yi's medicine every day, accompanied him to sleep on time, and paid attention to his situation at all times.So much so that she forgot to fetch Yan Yan back from Jiang Cheng.When he finally remembered, he met the person he least wanted to see at Jiang Cheng's house.

When Jiang Chenglai opened the door for him, Lin Minchen was holding Dudu with his back to him.When she heard the sound of the door opening, she turned around subconsciously, and the moment she saw Yan Zimu, a smile unconsciously formed on the corner of her mouth.

The little boy Yandudu was very excited to see his father, and he called out loudly: "Dad." He patted Lin Minchen's arm and signaled him to go down into the house.

As soon as Lin Minchen squatted down, he slid down his thigh and ran towards Yan Zimu quickly.Yan Zimu was afraid that he would fall, so he quickly reached out and hugged him into his arms.

The little Yandudu nestled quietly in his father's arms uncharacteristically, his little head stuck to his father's neck, motionless.Yan Zimu smiled, knowing that he was wronged.

Quickly freed one hand, gently patted his back and comforted him: "We Dudu are a little man now, since Dad is not around, we must not be crying, right?"

The little boy Yandudu quickly raised his head and said proudly, "I didn't cry, and I wasn't mischievous either. I'm very obedient."

Yan Zimu put him down, stared at his proud little face, couldn't help smiling and said, "Dad knows, our Dudu family is the most sensible." Little Yan Dudu raised his head and looked at him, his eyes full of expectation Said: "I am so obedient, can Dad not leave?"

Yan Zimu squatted down and kissed his face and said, "Okay, but not now, he has a serious illness. If he is sick, he needs someone to take care of him to get better, right? Dudu is so sensible, he won't have a father Angry, right?"

Little Yandudu thought for a moment, then nodded obediently.Yan Zimu gently rubbed the top of his hair.And Lin Minchen, who had been listening to their conversation, had a gloomy look in his eyes.