Morbid domestication

I seem to be having a long dream.

The figures alternated in the dream, but their faces were all blurred. I heard them talking, but I couldn't understand the content of the words. I only felt that my ears were full of noise.

So tired, so tired, I just want to wave away the shadow that keeps shaking in front of me, and plunge myself into the darkness completely.

Maybe my will was too strong, I felt that the shadows and voices were slowly fading away, and everything around me was gradually quieting down, and I allowed myself to merge into the thick ink-like void.

Time and consciousness seem to have stopped.

...

"Why are you so stupid!"

A furious female voice pierced my brain like a sharp sword, and my consciousness was instantly pulled back.

The surrounding lights are on again, I seem to be in a cramped room, the surrounding scenes are blurry, but so familiar.

The angle of view has become much lower, and I seem to be trapped in a short body. I can't move, but I can clearly perceive the emotions of this body, which is fear and self-blame.

I looked at the woman holding the test paper in front of me, the rage on her face ruined her pretty face, "Why can't you be more confident!"

"For whom do I work so hard every day? Why are you so useless! Why don't you listen to what I told you to work harder! Do you even want to fight against me..."

Who is she?

"Mom." I heard myself whisper, with a trembling voice: "I was wrong, don't punish me, I will definitely get it next time

The first..."

But this person I call my mother doesn't seem to care what I'm talking about, she's more like venting her emotions, hoarse...

Before I had time to react, the screen turned to another scene.

I seemed to be lying on a bed with pain all over my body, and the woman I called my mother was crying desperately while holding me.

"Niannian, mom is sorry for you. It's useless to be mom. I'm sorry...it's mom's fault. Mom won't call Niannian again...Niannian forgive mom, okay..."

Gradually, what she cried became, "I can't help it...Why do I have to live like this...Why did I become like this, I shouldn't..."

The screen then changed.

I seem to be in a classroom, I am sitting at the desk, which is covered with various test papers, and I am solving the problems meticulously with a pen.

Surrounded by a group of people who looked like junior high school students, they had expressions of disdain or curiosity on their faces. The people behind were whispering and whispering, while the leading boy in front spoke loudly as if showing off.

"grade

What's the use of the first one, do you know, let me tell you, his mother is out to sell, you know what selling is—"

Before he could finish speaking, I suddenly pushed the table away, picked up the stool and threw it at him, and the classroom quickly became a mess...

The scene begins to blur again, then becomes clear again.

I seemed to be standing in the room, and the woman in front of me, who I called my mother, was holding a hanger and was slapping me one after another. The woman was crying while beating, and kept asking questions.

"Why did you skip school!"

"Why fight!"

"You are so old, can't you let me worry a little bit!"

"Do you know how much I have put in to get you into this school! Is there anything you can't bear?"

In the dream, I didn't respond to her, but stood stubbornly, my back tensed, my lips pressed against the pain and I didn't say a word.

"Speak! Why don't you speak!"

...

The screen turns away again.

I was sitting at a low table in the room I called home, with a humble meal in front of me.

There was a man outside the door who kept knocking on the door. He seemed to be drunk, his voice was loud but he couldn't speak clearly, and he kept cursing uncleanly.

"Stinky bitch, open the door, it's spread all over the outside world, don't you just give the money, old... hiccup... I brought the money...hehe..."

The content of the conversation became more and more unbearable, and the sound of knocking on the door became louder and louder. In the end, the other party almost knocked on the door.

The woman in front of me was getting paler and paler, and her hand holding the chopsticks was trembling uncontrollably.

I put down the chopsticks in my hand and stood up silently.

The woman seemed to be taken aback by my actions, she immediately stopped her in a low voice after recovering: "A Nian, don't go..."

I didn't listen to her words, turned around and went to the kitchen, took out a kitchen knife from inside, and opened the door despite the woman's obstruction.

I kicked over the drunken man in front of me, bent down and grabbed him by the collar, put the knife on his neck, stared into his terrified eyes and said every word.

"Let me see you, I'll kill you! Anyway, I'm not yet 16, so I won't go to jail even if I kill you."

"roll!"

The man ran away rolling and crawling.

I stood up, glanced indifferently at the neighbors upstairs and downstairs who were watching the excitement, and turned around to see the woman holding the door frame and crying continuously.

I didn't say a word, just walked past her and entered the house...

...

The screen rotates faster and faster, one scene after another.

My short life flashed before my eyes like a revolving lantern. It was like watching a dull and depressing movie, summarizing my 27 years of life.

At the end of the picture, it stopped in a gorgeous and beautiful big house. I don't know why I saw such a scene.

Sunshine poured warmth through the glass windows into the house, and the air was full of happiness and comfort.

I seem to be even smaller, so small that my feet can't touch the ground when I sit on the piano bench.

I'm playing the piano, a very simple little star.

On the sofa not far away, sat a woman with a beautiful appearance and an elegant temperament.

She was holding a beautiful little boy in her arms, about seven or eight years old, but the boy had a serious face.

I seemed to be very happy. When the song was over, I turned my head and looked at the two people on the sofa, with unstoppable joy in my voice.

"Mom, brother, am I amazing!"

A gentle smile appeared on the woman's beautiful face, and she praised in a warm voice: "Yes, we are the best at Nian Nian, and we learned it so quickly."

I happily jumped off the piano bench, ran in front of the woman, took her hand and acted like a baby, "Because I am my mother's son, and my mother is so good at playing the piano, so I must be too!"

Then I turned to the boy in the picture and asked, "Brother, you haven't praised me yet."

The boy I called my brother seemed a bit reluctant, but he still said, "Brother, you are amazing."

I seemed to be very happy. After getting a positive answer, I said with some pride: "I finally have one thing that is better than my brother."

Then I looked at the woman, and said in a firm tone, "Mom, from today onwards, you will supervise me to practice every day...well... practice the piano for six hours!"

"Okay~" The woman held me in her arms and said with a smile: "But we are already so good at Nian Nian, so we don't have to work so hard, so let's study for 2 hours a day, okay?"

"That won't work, I finally managed to be a little better than my brother." After that, I seemed very unhappy: "Every time grandpa comes, he always praises his brother, and I want to be praised by him..."

"That's because you are too playful." The pretty boy corrected: "Every time you learn something, you are always interested in it for 3 minutes."

"That's because I don't like to learn those things, and I'm not as smart as you..." I said it as a matter of course.

"That's because you're lazy!"

"I'm not!"

Seeing that a quarrel was about to start, the woman interrupted softly: "Okay, my two babies are both great and smart."

The woman rubbed my head again: "Grandpa also likes us Nian Nian, so it is enough for us Nian Nian to be happy every day."

...

happy?There used to be.

It's just that this carefree happiness ended when I was 11 years old, and the woman didn't fulfill her promise.

The picture in the dream fades away again...

Another scene was changed, this time it seemed to be the scene after I jumped into the sea.

I was in the water, the salty and bitter sea water poured into my mouth and nose continuously, it was very uncomfortable, but I didn't struggle, let myself slowly sink down...

A large splash of water was stirred up not far from me, the bubbles faded away, and I saw that familiar face again, it was Feng Jue.

He was swimming towards me, and stretched out his hand to me...

Feng Jue...

I think if I see you again

On the first side, if I didn't take the umbrella you handed me, wouldn't all of this happen...

It sounded like someone was talking.

"Director Zhang, didn't you say that he is fine now? Why hasn't he woken up yet?"

It was a strange male voice.

"Mr. Xu, don't be too anxious. The patient's body is really fine. As for why he hasn't woken up until now, it may be that the patient has received too much mental stimulation. But don't worry, the patient will wake up almost two days later. coming..."

very noisy...

who is talking?

I tried to open my heavy eyelids, and I saw a dazzling white light, which made my eyes uncomfortable for a while, and I had to close them again.

Am I not dead?I belatedly thought, could it be that I was rescued by Feng Jue?

"Director! Mr. Xu! The patient seems to have just opened his eyes!" A young female voice sounded excited.

I had to open my eyes again, but fortunately my eyes got used to the sunlight a little bit, and after a while I could see the scene in front of me clearly.

I should be a hospital. There is a young female nurse in front of me. There are two people standing beside me. One looks like a doctor, and the other is someone I didn't expect.

"A Nian!" The man walked quickly and held my hand, his voice was a little unsteady: "You finally woke up, do you have any discomfort?"

I did not speak.

My brain was just hit by various past memories, so that I stared at the face that was exactly like mine in front of me, unable to recover for a long time.

Emphasize that the mother is not for sale.

"I" finally have my own real name...

It is not strictly a stand-in, which will be explained later..

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