The lure of rebirth

Life is neither fast nor slow, Xiao Bai is still the same Xiao Bai, Meng Jinlan is still the same Meng Jinlan, but they have all changed, in fact, they have all changed since a long time ago.

Xiao Bai's work and rest began to return to normal, he started to go to work, and his meals became punctual. Except for the occasional smoking and drinking, Xiao Bai was normal, and he no longer looked at the things left by Meng Jinlan every day, as if he had forgotten Meng Jinlan. Like.

Another day passed, and Meng Jinlan turned her head to look out the window. Today's sunset was particularly scorching, red as if it was about to bleed, beautiful, cruelly beautiful.

He stayed by Xiao Bai's side every day, watching Xiao Bai change little by little, watching Xiao Bai struggle in pain.

Meng Jinlan finally began to understand why he was kept, watching all this happen.

Probably because people like him cannot be redeemed. The legendary eighteen hells are all about physical torture.

And Meng Jinlan has already begun to wonder whether the place he is in now is the real hell. There is no physical pain, but the heart is like a knife. He thought that if the heartache is numb, it will not hurt, but the facts have proved that it It still hurts.

Meng Jinlan wanted to tell Xiao Bai that he was wrong about all this, a big mistake, he thought that he was not that important in Xiao Bai's heart, at least not so important.

In his imagination, if he died, Xiao Bai would be sad, sad, but not so painful.

For ten years, he fell in love with Xiao Bai so much that he became addicted, just like taking opium. Once he took it, he couldn't quit for a lifetime. Even if the two of them were together, he was still afraid, afraid that one day Xiao Bai would tell himself that he loves opium. I fell in love with someone and wanted to break up with myself.

It wasn't that he was nervous, but that he cared too much, loved the person to the bottom of his heart, and Xiao Bai didn't care that much. He thought that Xiao Bai was just pitying him when he was with him.

But now he hates his self-righteousness to death, why can't he trust Xiao Bai?In the eyes of outsiders, the ruthless and ruthless Meng Jinlan would withdraw into his shell like a tortoise when encountering emotional matters. He really didn't want to do this, and everything exceeded his expectations.

Xiao Bai cared unexpectedly, let him know clearly that Xiao Bai didn't love him, but he didn't see clearly, which caused the situation today.

He repented, regretted the unilateral decision at that time, but there is no regret medicine in the world for him to take, he is already dead, and he can never go back, he has no other expectations now, just hope, even in the form of a ghost, He can also be by Xiao Bai's side, guarding Xiao Bai silently by himself, even if... there really is a day when Xiao Bai gets married and has a child, he will recognize it, recognize it.

Another two months passed, and it was the end of August in a blink of an eye. Recently, nothing happened, and the days went on in a normal way.

Xiao Bai's company became busy, so Xiao Bai simply put all his energy into the company. For a while, his career was booming, and Xiao Fangfei was entangled with Xiao Bai again.

"Auntie, let me tell you very clearly that I don't plan to get married now, and even if I do, I don't need you to introduce someone to me." Xiao Bai sat on the boss's chair, holding a document in his hand, and looked at Xiao Bai without raising his head. Fang Fei said.

And there are many photos on Xiao Bai's desk, each of which is a woman, a mature and dignified woman, a cute and charming woman, a rich woman who can give birth in the eyes of the old man, all kinds of women, look like Xiao Fangfei The son is determined to find a wife for Xiao Bai.

When Xiao Fangfei heard what Xiao Bai said, she smiled, "It's okay, don't worry, if you have a girl you like, that's fine, bring it to Auntie sometime, as long as her character is good, Auntie won't object of."

Standing between the two of them, Meng Jinlan felt sour in his heart, looking at the photo on the table, wishing he could go up and tear it up, although he kept telling himself in his heart that he was no longer qualified to stop Xiao Bai, and besides, didn't he say that as long as Xiao Bai It doesn't matter if he is fine, but when he really faced such a situation, his heart was still twisted, twisted into a circle like a twist, and hurt.

He didn't want to hear it anymore, but he couldn't leave it. He could only resign himself to fate, and fate never gave him the right to choose.

"Okay, I see. I have another meeting now. Auntie, you can go back first. Don't worry, if there is someone you like, I will show it to you."

When Xiao Fangfei left, Xiao Bai sighed, leaned back on the chair, stretched out his hands to rub his temples on both sides, feeling tired.

Meng Jinlan walked behind Xiao Bai, hugged Xiao Bai from behind, and leaned his head on Xiao Bai's shoulder. The only thing he has learned in the past few months is to fix his body and form a posture that does not move. In that way, he will There is a feeling that Xiao Bai is really being held in his arms, even if the two of them can't feel it, he also likes this, and this is the only thing he can do.

Meng Jinlan said to herself, "Xiao Bai, do you miss me? Well, I won't be mentioned recently. Do you really hate me?"

He stroked Xiao Bai's face vaguely. "You've lost weight recently, and you eat a lot. Why don't you gain weight?"

"But it's still manly, like you said, man."

"Xiao Bai, give me some time, okay, I can't accept you getting married and having children now, but one day I will get used to it, I will, I will get used to it, don't worry about it so much, as long as I'm by your side That's enough... Hehe, really, I need time, Xiao Bai, please, don't forget me so quickly."

In the evening, after a long absence, Xiao Bai took out what Meng Jinlan had left for him, took out the disc, put it away, Xiao Bai sat there and watched quietly, and occasionally smiled, Meng Jinlan's personality is actually quite changeable , sometimes mature a little too much, sometimes it is childish.

In front of him will always be a child who has not grown up, and in front of outsiders will always be the arrogant Uncle Meng who seems to despise the existence of others.

Xiao Bai doesn't know what love is, but he knows that Meng Jinlan has become someone more important than himself, as he said a long time ago.

Human nature is bad, and people who love him unconditionally will become selfish. Meng Jinlan has loved him for so many years, always by his side and taking care of him, so he never thought that Meng Jinlan would leave him first, He knew that Meng Jinlan loved him and hated to part with him, but he forgot that many things cannot be decided by humans, just like his rebirth and Meng Jinlan's death.

And what still supports him to live is the feeling in his heart that he cannot explain to others. He knows that he is not crazy, and he feels that Meng Jinlan seems to be by his side, loving and accompanying him as before.

He is willing to wait, no matter how many years, as long as he thinks that one day he can see Meng Jinlan again, he will not feel bitter and lonely, and then when Meng Jinlan comes back, he will say love to him personally, and when they are old, Then go to the Netherlands together, to the place Meng Jinlan has always wanted to go.

Xiao Bai smiled, and turned to Meng Jinlan in the picture, "I'll wait for you to come back, you said, you want me to wait for you, then, let me tell you now, I am willing to wait for you to come back, as long as there is such a day, You will come back, I am willing."

Meng Jinlan never knew that ghosts also have tears, isn't it said that ghosts don't have tears?But what is it that flows out of his eyes?

Silently speaking, Meng Jinlan burst into tears, "Xiao Bai, don't wait for me, I can't go back, I love you, I will be with you for the rest of my life, but don't wait for me, I am not worthy, I am not worthy."

Meng Jinlan knelt on the ground, resenting God's injustice, Meng Jinlan had never done anything heinous in his life, why did he treat him like this, why.

At this moment, the two of them are clearly far away, and people and ghosts have different paths, but it seems that they are so close, within reach, and there is a lover that they cannot touch.

Many years ago, Xiao Bai was still a muddle-headed young man with a single heart, and Meng Jinlan was one of the most noble sons in the capital. At that time, they had never met, knew each other, or fell in love. There was no vicissitudes, pain, injury, or parting. Their lives stopped at the first rubbing shoulders, just like that sentence, without too many tragedies.

The few people on both sides who had fought just now became friends who did not know each other before.

Two handsome young boys looked at each other and smiled.

"Hello, Meng Jinlan."

"Hello, Xiao Bai."

If life is just like first sight, why is Qiu Feng sadly painting a fan.

There is no beginning, and there is no end. In fact, everyone's initial thoughts are good, but time will make us forget the initial thoughts and initial determination. This is life. Those who can end well will have Several people.

This afternoon, Xiao Bai received a call from Cheng Jun. Cheng Jun spoke cautiously, saying that he was going to Dark Color Gathering, and asked Xiao Bai if he wanted to go.

To be honest, it is impossible to have no resentment towards Cheng Jun, but Xiao Bai knows the helplessness of Cheng Jun being caught between him and Jinlan, so resentment is the same thing, in Xiao Bai's eyes, Cheng Jun is still his brother.

When Xiao Bai said good words, Cheng Jun over there showed a rare smirk on his face.

Meng Jinlan was also happy watching from the sidelines, that's how brothers should be, isn't it?

Xiao Bai, Cheng Jun, Huo Zeyang, Huo Zejun, and Meng Jinlan, who is in a soul state, have not had a proper gathering for almost a year. In a year, too many things happened, too many things that they could not expect.

Because of Meng Jinlan's matter, the few people spoke a little rigorously, for fear that a good party would break up unhappily.

"Has this time been okay?" Cheng Jun looked at Xiao Bai, his tone was very light.

Huo Zeyang also stared at Xiao Bai eagerly.

Xiao Bai sighed, "You don't have to do this, I've said it, I'm fine, don't say that I don't mention Jin Lan because of me, it's fine, besides, I'm not used to you doing this."

Although Xiao Bai said so, the three of them still weighed their words carefully, for fear that mentioning Meng Jinlan would make Xiao Bai sad.

Seeing all this, Meng Jinlan felt sad, they are best friends, how could such a day happen?Sure enough, is it because of him?

Seeing the cautious attitude of the three, Xiao Bai had no choice. Now, the only thing that can make their relationship more natural is time.

Xiao Bai sat for a while before planning to leave, facing such three people, he was also embarrassed.

Seeing that Xiao Bai really wanted to leave, the three of them didn't try to keep him.

Xiao Bai drove the car, looked at the ever-changing city, and felt that he was really getting old.

Sitting next to Xiao Bai, Meng Jinlan suddenly had a feeling, a very clear feeling, that he might leave Xiao Bai.

He had already forgotten how to resist fate, now he knew very well that God would deprive him of such a right, this time he really wanted to leave Xiao Bai, his favorite Xiao Bai.

Meng Jinlan didn't know how Xiao Bai's car collided with another car.

When he came back to his senses, only Xiao Bai was sitting on the driver's seat and his head hit the windshield. Bright red blood flowed from Xiao Bai's forehead. Meng Jinlan looked at Xiao Bai's closed eyes, not knowing what to do , how to save Xiao Bai.

He knew that he was going to leave Xiao Bai, but what happened now?Is God playing another joke with him?

Meng Jinlan was angry, God, why did it become like this?Yes, you've been watching my jokes, watching me helplessly watch the one I love hurt, watch him break without being able to hug him, watch him cry without comfort, but you can't let me watch him die .

I have nothing left, all I have left is my heart that loves him.

I can lose my mind, can't I?Just this once, in exchange, can you let me touch him for the last time.

Meng Jinlan closed her eyes and shouted silently to the sky.I hope someone can hear his voice, he can not enter the six realms of reincarnation, he can exchange all his afterlife, he can choose eternal death in exchange for such a last chance.

Just let him touch Xiao Bai one last time, his obsession, his greed, and his love will all end forever this time.

As long as Xiao Bai is well, he is willing to do whatever is asked of him.

This is the first time Meng Jinlan thanked God so much. Seeing himself touching Xiao Bai's hand, Meng Jinlan cried with joy. He couldn't let Xiao Bai die like this. He couldn't bear it. He wanted Xiao Bai to be well. When Bai gets married and has children, as long as Xiao Bai is healthy, he is willing to do whatever it is.

Meng Jinlan moved her body to the driver's seat, grabbed Xiao Bai, "Xiao Bai, wake up, don't sleep" took out Xiao Bai's mobile phone and called 120, Meng Jinlan looked at Xiao Bai's shin that was stuck, and didn't know what to do. How to move Xiao Bai's legs out.

It was very painful, the whole body was in pain, Xiao Bai was in a daze, feeling a little emptiness in his body, and a familiar voice came from his ear, making him feel like he was hallucinating.

His head was hugged into a familiar embrace, and his body had a smell that he was no longer familiar with. A pair of small hands touched his face coldly and gently.

Xiao Bai smiled, he finally waited for his Jin Lan, tried to open his eyes, and saw the man he missed to the bone.

Those eyes that were always looking at him with incomparable gentleness, lacked the old, young and handsome side face in the video, his Jin Lan.

Xiao Bai controlled himself and didn't let himself cry, but his voice was still crying, "You finally came, and I knew you still couldn't bear to part with me, Jinlan, where have you been? Why didn't you come to me? Yes Didn't you blame me for not treating you well before? Didn't say I love you?"

Meng Jinlan shook her head vigorously, bit her lip, and whimpered.

"No, I didn't blame you, I blamed myself, Xiao Bai, I was wrong."

Xiao Bai ignored the pain in his leg, sat up straight, pulled Meng Jinlan into his arms, hugged her tightly, buried his face in Meng Jinlan's collarbone, and cried out.

"Jinlan, I love you...I love you, don't leave me again, okay? From now on, I will follow you whatever you say. You said that you are going to Holland. I will definitely accompany you this time, and then we Bury your name under that tree, okay?"

Meng Jinlan didn't nod, but looked at Xiao Bai with regret.

For some reason, Xiao Bai understood Meng Jinlan's eyes, "You said you wanted me to wait for you, Jinlan, I've been waiting for you, don't go, en." Xiao Bai grabbed Meng Jinlan's hand nervously, As if Meng Jinlan would not leave him like that, "Please, Jinlan, I beg you, don't go, don't leave me."

"Xiao Bai, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm not qualified to stay by your side anymore"

Feeling that her body was gradually getting lighter, Meng Jinlan knew that the time had come.

Xiao Bai's eyes showed fear, he could not feel Meng Jinlan's skin while he was holding Meng Jinlan's hands, Xiao Bai slowly lowered his head, Meng Jinlan's body became transparent.

"No...no, don't, Jinlan, don't leave..."

Meng Jinlan smiled wryly, closed her eyes, and said cruelly, "Xiao Bai, live well, find a woman, have a child, and live well, even if it's for me, live well."

Xiao Bai shook his head, "Jinlan, don't go..."

Meng Jinlan stared at Xiao Bai seriously, "Promise me, find a woman to have a baby, okay, then I can close my eyes with peace of mind, Xiao Bai, I beg you, agree to my last request in this life, eh? "

"Okay, I promise you, Jinlan, then you promise me too, wait for me, wait for me to go down, and we will reincarnate together, okay?"

Xiao Bai looked at Meng Jinlan carefully, as if he wanted to carve Meng Jinlan's appearance deep into his soul.

Meng Jinlan didn't know if he would have another life, he had just exchanged his new life for the last time with Xiao Bai, but he still nodded, "Okay, I'll wait for you, let's go together."

Death is not terrible, but the time to wait for death makes people despair, knowing that they will die, but still laughing.

He knew that that person would leave, but he still expected it. He would not give up until the last moment.

Meng Jinlan looked at Xiao Bai, and said silently, with tears rolling down her face, "Xiao Bai, I love you."

Looking at the empty place in front of him, Xiao Bai finally closed his eyes in despair. Before he fell into a coma, Xiao Bai hoped that his life would end here. From this moment on, Xiao Bai's life no longer has expectations. The white world is no longer full of colors, only gray and white.

The author has something to say: I will write a few side stories next, and then start the story of the third volume.