Love on the left bank, you on the right bank

The heavy rain outside the window suddenly fell, hitting the window continuously, covering the entire glass surface, making it difficult for people to see the scenery outside the window clearly.

"So, are you doubting me?" The teacher said calmly, even a little indifferently.

"Then what should I believe?" I smiled wryly, "It's come to this point, what can I believe?"

The smog and rain are densely woven with the pain that I refuse to give in.I clenched my fists tightly, as if I had been punched a few times, both sad and disappointed.

I had a splitting headache, and I shook my head to try to clear my mind, but to my desperation, I became more and more dizzy, propped my head on my hands, and closed my eyes tightly.

"Are you okay? Is your head hurting?" As soon as the teacher's hand touched me, I immediately shook it off.I rubbed my temples, trying to stay awake, "It doesn't matter."

"Zuo Siting, stop making trouble." The teacher lowered his face and held my face with both hands carefully, but I pushed it away again. "Don't make trouble?" The tone was so sharp and harsh, but I couldn't control my irritability, "Am I making trouble for no reason? When did I make trouble? Why do you say I made trouble?"

The words were urgent and fast, and I couldn't stop, "You said you want to separate, I will wait for you obediently and not quarrel with you; I don't want to ask, I won't ask...why do you still treat me like a wayward child and always say I'm making trouble!"

I raised my hand to wipe away the tears that accidentally spilled from the corner of my eyes, "Teacher doesn't let me know anything, and he always waits for something to happen before he is willing to explain to me... If I didn't read the completed book of the year, teacher, you would Will you take the initiative to tell me about this? Will you?" The almost questioning tone, even I couldn't bear to hear it, the disappointment inside was too deep...

The teacher sighed softly, and sat on the edge of the bed, "I will indeed hide it as much as I can." I was stunned for a long time and couldn't speak. After recovering, I cried aggrievedly, and said in a low hoarse voice: " Why are you hiding it from me? Why are you playing with my feelings..."

"I'm sorry, Si Ting, I'm sorry." The teacher embraced me and hugged me even tighter despite my struggle, "I don't know...I'm not even sure..."

"...Not sure what?"

"Not sure if I really love you."

I closed my eyes, no more strength to struggle.

"Then teacher, tell me, what should we do?" The embrace gradually lost its temperature, and the coldness fell directly to the bottom of my heart and spread slowly.

"One is anxious, the other only loves shadows, what should we do?"

"But I'm sure of one thing." The teacher whispered in my ear, "I don't want to be separated from you."

"But, I'm tired." I gently pushed her away, "I'd rather be alone for the rest of my life than a person who only loves the shadow left on me."

"..."

"Why do people want to be with someone they don't love?" Eyes slowly filled with tears again, "Isn't being together just because of love? Isn't it..."

"Let's start over, shall we?" The teacher patted my head and coaxed me softly.

"I will only be me, I will always be Su Tingyu's daughter, and the teacher will only love Su Tingyu...Teacher, can you accept that your lover is the daughter of an old lover?"

The teacher chuckled a few times, patted my head fondly, "For you, I am willing to try."

"But, you don't love me." I sighed weakly while rubbing my sore temples, and gently took off the earrings on my earlobes.I reached out and grabbed the teacher's wrist, and put the earring on the teacher's palm, "Give it back to you, I don't want it anymore..."

The teacher didn't accept it for a long time, and he looked at it deeply with hesitant eyes. "Are you sure?"

I stayed for a few seconds and smiled slowly, "I have never been the one to choose. Heartbeat is a feeling, not a choice. Maybe I don't love the teacher as much as I imagined... I will be panicked , I will always guess whether the teacher's gaze is full of another person's shadow, I just fit the look you love, that's all."

In the confrontation with each other, I also felt tired, and the words I said seemed so powerless, "You think it doesn't matter, you can start again, but I can't take the sincerity of the past six months as hypocrisy, those words, those caring, I Only then did I realize that it was all for someone else, how can I be so embarrassing?"

"Si Ting, calm down." The teacher patted the top of my head, touched my cheek, and persuaded softly, "I will tell you all this, but not now, I will tell you when you calm down , okay?"

"The teacher still treats me like a child." I smiled wryly.

"Then why are you forcing yourself to grow up?"

"Because, I want to protect you." I stood up and picked up the clothes hanging on the chair, "But I found that the teacher walked very fast, I walked too slowly, no matter how hard I ran, I couldn't catch up with you. Just Like now, the teacher thinks it’s okay and can take it calmly, but I have lingering uneasiness and knots in my heart. The teacher can deal with it calmly, but I seem to be unreasonable.”

"I'll stop and wait for you, can't I?" The teacher's voice came from behind, I turned my face and shook my head slowly, "But I don't want you to stop..."

"...In this way, it seems that the hyperbola and the asymptotic line run counter to each other. Wouldn't it be better?" I laughed a few times, and some unpleasant things were barely mixed in.

"The earth is round, even if we run in opposite directions, we will meet again one day."

"Maybe." I opened the bedroom door, leaned against the wall, and said to the teacher, "Anyway... Thank you teacher for telling me the truth, I want to be alone and give me some time, so , let’s separate temporarily.” Without waiting for the teacher’s answer, I directly closed the door and closed Hope at the same time.

Will it be too embarrassing?I laughed a few times, as if laughing at myself.

I picked up my schoolbag from the sofa and immediately felt a shock.After rummaging for my phone, I picked it up and looked back at the empty hallway, forcing me to realize the truth—we don't love each other enough.

"Xiao Zuo, are you listening? 』

I came back to my senses and quickly answered the president, "President, yes, I am listening." 』

"Then what did I just say? 』

"Uh..." I scratched my head and giggled a few times.The president seemed to understand my pretending to be stupid, and she said it again kindly, "I just said that the Beiyi women's basketball team came to our school for an exchange, so come to the school quickly." 』

"Northern women's basketball team? ’I raised my voice a little, and opened the iron door and locked it, 『Ah!It seems that there is such a thing, I forgot...」

"How dare you speak!where are you now 』

"I'll be there in 15 minutes! After the words fell, I immediately hung up the phone and ran to school, feeling the deep pain in my heart, which was still aching.

That day, I pushed away the teacher and wiped out all my sincerity.