There are no couples on the road

Although the operation is indeed a "manual" operation, because it involves fine manipulation of bones and some tissues, it took six hours for the entire operation to be completed.

... Shi Xun really didn't want to recall how he solved the problem of going to the toilet halfway.

He didn't really want to admit it, but he felt that he was indeed a little weak.In the middle, because the effectiveness of the anesthesia faded, some doses were added. Now that the arm is immobilized again, he can't feel his right arm very much.

All night I could only lie flat.Shi Xun looked at the phone screen drowsily, wanting to say something more, but there was really nothing to fill in that blank space.

All he could say was, don't be sad.

Don't be sad, it's not worth being sad for him, you shouldn't be sad anymore.

He has already left, and every time he thinks about the arena, League of Legends, and many good and bad things, there is a vague sense of suffocation.

Of course Jiang Weichi would be unwilling, whether it was for him or for the feelings for him, it was not so easy to get over it.

Shi Xun hopes to let himself go, and at the same time let Jiang Weichi not be obsessed with it.

What can he do, contact doesn't solve the problem, it just delays.

He can't go back.

This is the truth.

Shi Xun had already started to feel sleepy and confused. He made a voice call to his mother. He just saw his complexion in the mirror. He didn't want to worry his mother who was already worried enough.

"...Hey, mom, the operation is over, um, it's good, the doctor said it was a success."

"It's weak, it's a little bit, I'm just a little tired, and I'll sleep in a while."

"It doesn't hurt, really, the anesthesia hasn't passed yet. No, you must mention the scar. There will definitely be a scar on the palm of your hand... Well, the doctor said four centimeters, because all layers were cut. , so it will take a while to heal..."

Shi Xun smiled and sighed, "Come here to accompany me? What about work, big boss? You can't hurt me for me."

"Yes, yes, I will support you if you resign, but can you let go of the dear people?"

"I'm not poor with you, I'm a little tired, I have to sleep."

Shi Xun felt that it was the first time he experienced such a thing as vitality, and he probably lost his vitality now. He felt that he needed to use a lot of strength to make a sound even when he spoke.

If you contact the little assistant, you will definitely hear your weakness immediately.

Shi Xun didn't intend to tell Jiang Weichi about his surgery.In fact he doesn't want to tell anyone who doesn't know by now.

He became a professional gamer in his teens, and the friends he has brought in over the years are also people in the circle.Players, anchors, high-scoring passers-by, host commentators...every one is closely related to LOL.

Easy to say, but some consolation.

But consolation can only bring him pain.

If you are also suffering, then when you get through it, the little assistant should be able to come out.Shi Xun fell asleep.

Jiang Weichi muted his phone when he entered the consultation room.

On the way to the hospital, he thought for a long time how he should state his "condition".From the day when Shi Xun fought with him and announced his retirement to the present, it has only been about three weeks, but looking back, it seems to have been a long time, long enough for him to react.

The doctor was calm, but gentle.Perhaps it was the feeling of being cared for for a long time, Jiang Weichi was a little dazed for a while when he heard the doctor ask him what was wrong.After thinking about it, let's start with the most basic things.

"I've been... for like three weeks lately, having a hard time falling asleep. Even when I do fall asleep, it's a nightmare, and I'm... very tired, and at the same level of training, um, the same intensity as before... "

Jiang Weichi spoke intermittently, while thinking about his condition, he heard the voice in his head, "Actually, it's not a big deal, you're making a fuss, go back, don't need to see a doctor."

Jiang Weichi rubbed his temples, recently there was always a kind of dull pain that he would feel a few days after being hit.

"How was your sleep before, was it more of a light sleep state? What is the frequency of dreams, or nightmares, compared to the recent state?" The doctor sorted out and recorded what Jiang Weichi said on the computer. content, then looked at him and asked for more details.

"I used to," Jiang Weichi smiled cautiously, "I didn't suffer from sleep disturbances before. Sleeping is one of my... hobbies, and I rarely dreamed. If there was a bad sleep, it was probably when I was ten years old. Because of some things at home... During that time, I often had nightmares and woke up, but not like now, I can only sleep about three hours a day."

"What else is going on? Have you been crying frequently or experiencing emotional breakdown recently?"

Jiang Weichi was silent for a few seconds, then nodded lightly, "Yes, I cried for hours this morning. Besides, I don't know how to say it, it seems that I have lost hope for everything, and I feel like I can't do anything, at least No... in the absence of my teammates, colleagues, leaving, I..."

Jiang Weichi lowered his head, his lower eyelids were burned by the tears that welled up again.He didn't know that his eyes were red now, and the tip of his nose was also red, like a rabbit with snow-white fur.

"On the premise that you don't feel that your privacy is violated or uncomfortable, tell me in general, have you experienced anything recently, such as quarrels, broken relationships, family relationships, the death of relatives or friends, irritating scenes, such as car accidents or disasters on site?"

The doctor stopped typing on the keyboard, moved the seat forward, crossed his hands on the table, and looked at Jiang Weichi very gently.

"I...I am a sports player, my partner, we have partnered for six years, I...he retired three weeks ago." Jiang Weichi looked down at his fingertips, and found that at some point, he His hands were trembling slightly, he didn't know what to say, so he bit his lower lip.

"He had to, but I, I'm so sad. It's like, everything is different, I thought I accepted it, but..."

"It's okay, just speak slowly and say whatever comes to mind." The doctor guided him, "Is there any more special connection between you and him?"

Jiang Weichi rested his elbows on his knees, buried his face in his hands, and wiped his eyes, "I like him. To me, he is like the sun, but... I don't Way to catch the light."

"He didn't tell me, I understand, he was in a difficult situation." Jiang Weichi didn't realize that he was choked up, "He is the best player, I know he was scolded by many people because he never got the best result , but... But I still hope he can tell me in advance."

"I wish I could be different."

"I know him……"

"I know he can't like me."

"I still want him not to just disappear like this, but I also know." Jiang Weichi paused, as if he had only just understood the meaning of this sentence, "He can't come back to the arena, and he will just disappear like this. in my life."

"He's still so gentle."

"I am so sad."

The doctor didn't say anything, but sorted out the general situation, and gave Jiang Weichi a few sheets of scales, asking him to take the scales for further diagnosis.

Jiang Wei paid the money late, and followed the guide to the room where the psychological scale was tested.The names of the scales are very complicated, and he was worried that he might not do it right. He was relieved when the medical staff guided him to start the test.

In the few seats around me, there are children who can't read all the words, children who need their mothers to accompany them, and old people who don't even know how to use a mouse.Jiang Weichi went down one question after another, feeling safe for a while, and feeling being watched for a while, and felt uncomfortable all over.

The scale was finished quickly. He took the results and looked at them himself, and found that the results were all the evaluation percentages of indicators such as depression, anxiety, and terror.

He can also basically analyze it himself. It is a relatively heavy depression and some anxiety factors.

What am I anxious about, the team, myself, or the sense of confusion that has appeared since Shi Xun left that makes me uneasy?Jiang Weichi grabbed the scale and went to do the EEG, brain topography and blood routine.

Shi Xun was not afraid of injections at all, Jiang Weichi looked at the blue blood vessels in his forearm as the pillow sank into his forearm.After two tubes of blood were drawn, Jiang Weichi felt nervous, tired, and slightly dizzy.

He has no history of allergies or family diseases, and there is no problem with the blood routine results coming out in the afternoon.

The doctor had a basic judgment before asking him to take the scale, and discussed with him whether he could take the medicine.

Jiang Weichi asked without hope, "If I don't take medicine, can it be adjusted?"

The doctor pondered for a while, "I can't say there is no hope, but the process is too difficult, and the probability of success is very low, so medicine is the easiest way, and it can help you in many ways."

Jiang Weichi returned to the consulting room with several results and handed them to the doctor.

"On the whole, there is a gradual increase in depression and mild anxiety. Don't be afraid of it. It can be resolved through treatment. Of course, it also depends on your own adjustment and cooperation. It can't be reached yet. The degree of depression, but it is hard to say if it is allowed to develop."

"Is it really possible for me to come out?" Jiang Weichi said.

"You have to have confidence, and don't feel any psychological pressure on taking medicine. This is normal. People need to take medicine for treatment when they are sick. Take it as a positive thing."

"I found it online, that is, the side effects of the drug..."

The doctor thought for a while, "Your situation is relatively clear, you can find a clear reason, and there is no genetic factor, and the symptoms are not serious, so I will choose a drug with minimal side effects for you. How is your financial situation? Can it support a monthly fee of more than 1000? Imported drugs will have a better effect, and you should have found popular science in this regard during the process of checking the information."

"It doesn't matter in this regard, the main reason is that my training tasks are relatively heavy, and I am worried that it will be delayed..." Jiang Weichi was still a little worried.

"The side effects of drugs, especially psychiatric drugs, vary from person to person, and the differences are obvious. In fact, you also know that if you don't take drugs, your current training state is not good."

Jiang Weichi nodded.

"Lysip is very suitable for your condition. Generally speaking, the side effects are mild. There may be some reactions in the first few days. You should take it after breakfast in the morning. As for Laura, it is actually a stable drug. Don't take too much. Long-term use will cause certain side effects. Dependence. But it depends on your own comfort, first use it to help you fall asleep, try to take half a tablet at first, if it doesn’t work, change to one tablet.”

Jiang Weichi didn't come to follow up until two weeks later, when the medicine really started to work. When he was queuing up to buy the medicine, he still couldn't recover.

He looked at the gray sky outside the window, took out his phone, and saw the message from Shi Xun.

"I will get better slowly." Jiang Weichi typed, watching tears fall on the screen, "You have to take your time too, don't be sad."

After sleeping for a few hours, Shi Xun woke up.

He was still a little dazed, not knowing what he was doing and why he woke up suddenly.

Then I felt pain in my right hand.The pain fell on the surface of the deep pool in his head like a waterfall, Shi Xun couldn't even make a sound, he gritted his teeth, and the cold sweat instantly wet the hospital gown and stuck it to his back.

After a few minutes, he breathed a sigh of relief.

He saw the phone light up, but he had no strength at all.He closed his eyes tiredly, and fumbled for the call bell on the bedside with his still movable right hand.

The nurse came over to take painkillers for him, but Shi Xun knew that this might be the only chance to use painkillers.

During the long recovery process, he had to grit his teeth and survive as before.

The author says:

Rubbing our beautiful cubs and Linghua, rubbing you too, will be all right.