Too much

When the hour hand reached five o'clock in the morning, the phone had already turned off automatically. Shen Zeming held it for a while, took a deep breath, got up from the bed, swayed to the bathroom and turned on the shower.

The cold water hit his head, and the five senses paralyzed by alcohol gradually recovered. That video was like a knife, easily tearing apart the past that he had deliberately ignored all these years.

For a long time, Shen Zeming thought about it more than once, if he had told Qi Jingchen about Shen Zelin at the beginning, how different the results would be between them.

But later he knew that even without Shen Zelin, he and Qi Jingchen would have to be separated.At that time, Qi Hanshan was going to take his newlywed wife to settle abroad, Sheng Juan couldn't accept it, and insisted that Qi Hanshan bring Qi Jingchen along.So of course, as Qi Jingchen's legal guardian, Sheng Juan had to go abroad together.

In any case, Shen Zeming took the most extreme kind.

Qi Jingchen should hate him.

After turning off the shower, the fully charged phone showed three missed calls, all of which were from Song Lan.Shen Zeming only glanced at it, then threw away his phone to wipe his hair.

After his hair was dry, he walked over and picked up his mobile phone to call back.

Today is the Dragon Boat Festival, a day for family reunion, but the scope of the family does not include Shen Zeming.At this time last year, Shen Zeming was grading papers and preparing lessons in the office, and Shen Ming and Song Lan had no intention of calling him to go back for the holidays.

As soon as the call was connected, Song Lan's unkind voice rang in his ears.

"Just woke up or something? I've called you for a long time and there is no response."

Shen Zeming looked up at the time - [-]:[-], and explained without expression: "Just got up, the phone is on silent."

"Oh." Song Lan replied dissatisfied, and then said, "Come back in the afternoon, for a treat at home during the Dragon Boat Festival."

Shen Zeming didn't like it and was not good at dealing with such things. He was about to find a reason to refuse when he heard Song Lan say, "Don't say you're busy. It's a big holiday. I know your school is on holiday today and tomorrow."

Shen Zeming was silent for a moment, then lowered his eyes and agreed.

The meal time was set at six o'clock in the afternoon. After four o'clock, Shen Zeming changed his clothes, went to the fruit shop at the gate of the community, bought a few apples, and walked to the subway station.

In the past few years, Shen Zelin's illness has improved slightly, so Shen Ming and Song Lan saved up money to buy a new house with four bedrooms and two halls in a university town near Shen Zelin University, so that it would be convenient for Shen Zelin to go home and rest after school.

The university town is on the outskirts of the city, quite far away from Shen Zeming's place, and it takes two subway transfers.The subway is replaced with bright red advertising posters for decoration, and the digital display screen in the lobby scrolls back and forth in big red characters "Happy Dragon Boat Festival".

It may be because of the festival, there were very few people, Shen Zeming sat in the carriage with only three people, leaning against the stainless steel railing next to the seat in a daze.

After the video was sent, Qi Jingchen never sent him any new messages.With a secret mood, Shen Zeming mustered up the courage to call, but was hung up quickly, and there was only a beeping busy tone on the receiver.

Shen Zeming pursed his lips and turned off the phone.

What can you say when you connect?There was a gap of ten years between them, and they were destined not to die easily.

After nearly an hour, the subway finally arrived at the station, and Shen Zeming walked out of the station carrying a plastic bag containing several apples.

Considering the convenience of Shen Zelin's going to school, Shen Ming deliberately chose among several properties near the subway station.After walking for seven or eight minutes, Shen Zeming swiped his card to enter this place that he hadn't been to a few times.

He rang the doorbell, and it was Shen Zelin who opened the door.

For some reason, Shen Zelin's eyes and brows revealed unconcealable joy, like a primary school student who got a perfect score in an exam and was rewarded by his parents.Even seeing Shen Zeming, he didn't express much dissatisfaction.

When Shen Zeming walked in, he realized that the guest Song Lan was talking about was Qi Jingchen.

No wonder Shen Zelin was so happy.

Shen Zeming stood firmly at the door, looking straight at Qi Jingchen.The latter raised his eyes and glanced at him lightly, as if he had no intention of chatting with him, so he leaned over and listened carefully to Shen Zelin's speech.

Unable to describe how he felt, Shen Zeming squeezed the plastic bag in his hand, stood for a while, and bent down to change his shoes.

Song Lan and Shen Ming were both busy in the kitchen. After a while, the sound of cooking stopped. Song Lan wore an apron, came out with a plate of food in each hand, and called for dinner.

Shen Zelin quickly jumped up from the sofa, hooked up the slippers on his toes, and when he stood up, he lowered his head and approached Qi Jingchen's ear, whispered something, and the two of them laughed together.

Others didn't know what to do, but Shen Zeming felt that this scene was extremely dazzling. He took a breath, stood up at the beginning, and went to the kitchen first to help serve the dishes.

The meal was very rich, and half the table was filled with meat dishes alone.Shen Zeming sat against the wall according to his previous habit, habitually looking up at Qi Jingchen.

Ten years ago, when eating together, Qi Jingchen always sat next to him, the opposite of Shen Zelin.

But he forgot that it was ten years later.

Qi Jingchen didn't look at him, walked to Shen Zelin and sat down.

This is the second time Qi Jingchen has ignored him.Shen Zeming moved his fingers holding the chopsticks, and lowered his head deeply.

If Shen Zeming, who was out of place, was ignored, the atmosphere of the meal could be considered lively.Song Lan looked very happy, and even urged Shen Ming to get some red wine to drink.

Qi Jingchen also gave face, with a smile in his eyes, he told a lot of interesting things about his experience abroad at the dinner table.

After all, maybe the atmosphere was too good, Song Lan couldn't help but mention the old things ten years ago, "Back then you just left as you said, the night before A Juan said she would come to my house for dinner, and the next day it was like that. We left in a hurry, we were really worried."

Qi Jingchen smiled frankly when he heard the words, picked up a piece of braised pork and put it into a bowl, and said, "I'm sorry for worrying my uncle and aunt. I was also quite surprised at the time, and my mother didn't tell me in advance."

Qi Jingchen's rhetoric was no different from what she had heard. Song Lan saw that he didn't want to say more, so she asked about Sheng Juan's recent situation.

"A few years ago, I was a little stimulated and had mental problems." Qi Jingchen smiled for some reason, "I have been staying in a mental hospital for these years, and I don't know when I will recover."

Song Lan was speechless for a while, showing a regretful and amazed expression, "How could this happen? If it wasn't too far away, we must go and see her."

Qi Jingchen smiled, and had no intention of speaking.

"Is it related to what happened back then?" Song Lan carefully observed Qi Jingchen's face, and carefully chose his words, for fear of accidentally offending him, "We lost contact after you left, alas, I tried many methods, but I couldn't get in touch. You guys, I didn't expect..." Qi Jingchen didn't change his face: "There was nothing to do back then, but my dad was going abroad, and my mom asked me to go too, the ticket was booked in a hurry, and there was no time to do many things."

Speaking of this, Shen Zeming felt a light gaze passing over his face as if it meant something.

He raised his eyes to check, but Qi Jingchen didn't look at him at all, he was even indifferent to his gaze, and was still talking to Song Lan.

Shen Zeming lowered his eyelids, he didn't know what he wanted to do, he dug a big spoonful of broad beans that he didn't like to eat, put it into his mouth, chewed and swallowed mechanically.

Later the topic turned back to Shen Zelin, Song Lan scolded him first, and then asked Qi Jingchen with a flattering smile if he could help with some English.

She said: "This child is poor at elementary school English. He is almost in his third year and has not passed the fourth level. He is so worried about me and your uncle. Jingchen, you have been abroad for so long. Can you help me when you are free?" How about helping Lin'er?"

Qi Jingchen readily agreed, with a slight smile in his eyes, "Yes, just let him come to my house when the time comes."

Shen Zelin and Song Lan rejoiced, and the atmosphere became even more enthusiastic.

Something seemed to be churning in his stomach, Shen Zeming stretched out his hand to hold it expressionlessly, put another chopstick of broad beans into his mouth, chewed them expressionlessly, and swallowed them again.

It tastes like chewing wax, but that's all.

He couldn't figure out why Song Lan must have asked him to come for this meal.He is like an outsider, out of tune with everything in the house, including Qi Jingchen who ignores him.

Shen Zeming put down his chopsticks and stood up, lowered his eyes and said, "I'm full, I'll go back first."

At this time, Qi Jingchen's eyes naturally fell on his face, but that's all, nothing more.

Song Lan nodded and tried her best to look like a loving mother: "Today is the holiday, stay for one night and go back tomorrow."

Knowing that it was out of politeness, Shen Zeming didn't want to stay overnight, but at this moment Song Lan said, "Jingchen is also staying at home tonight. Aren't you two high school classmates? You must have a lot to talk about."

So Shen Zeming stopped and stayed.

After dinner, no one cleared the table, and they all moved to the living room to watch TV and talk together.Shen Zeming didn't go, and stayed in the guest room, staring at the funny short video on his phone, but the video played in a loop several times, but he didn't click a single one.

Song Lan and the others spoke loudly, but they were actually trivial daily matters, there was absolutely no need to eavesdrop, but Shen Zeming just couldn't help it, couldn't help looking for Qi Jingchen amidst a bunch of annoying noises.

Throughout the afternoon, Qi Jingchen didn't ignore him for a moment.Shen Zeming didn't know what he did wrong, but he seemed to know his mistake - about the cruel parting ten years ago.

But what is he going to do?As time goes by, it seems that there is no need to explain some things, and the person who wants to listen may not care anymore.

He doesn't like to be ignored, it feels like he is not even as important as an annoying mosquito to Qi Jingchen.

The conversation in the living room continued until 10:30 p.m.After the lights went out and everything was quiet, Shen Zeming opened the door lightly, walked to the door of another guest room, and pushed the door open without hesitation.

Qi Jingchen wasn't asleep yet, with his glasses aside, he half-lyed on the bed and swiped his phone.

He didn't seem to be surprised that Shen Zeming came looking for him at all, he raised his eyes to look at him indifferently, then moved his eyes back to the phone screen, his voice was flat and unwavering: "What's the matter?"

Shen Zeming grabbed the corner of his clothes tightly, and found that there was really nothing to talk about between him and Qi Jingchen.

What is he doing here?

Silence spread in every corner of the room, Qi Jingchen tapped the phone screen a few times, and the shutdown vibration sounded.He had no expression on his face, looked at Shen Zeming, and said lightly, "I'm sleepy."

This is the obvious eviction order. Shen Zeming opened his eyes slightly in a panic, moved his lips, and said in a low voice: "That video...you—" "Well, it's burned." Qi Jingchen interrupted him, "There is still Anything else? I'm going to bed."

When he said this, Qi Jingchen acted impatiently, as if Shen Zeming was a difficult and annoying client, and as a second, Qi Jingchen had to take time to deal with it.

Thinking of this, Shen Zeming was dumbfounded.

It was at this moment that he suddenly realized that Qi Jingchen didn't even have the politeness and harsh teasing after the initial reunion with him.

He is air.As long as Qi Jingchen is willing, Shen Zeming is not even as good as a fly in his life, maybe not even a stranger.

The chill climbed from the back of the neck to the top of the head, and then spread to the whole body. Shen Zeming felt a chill down his spine, and a rare sense of fear arose.

When Qi Jingchen left, he was not afraid.When Qi Jingchen came back to take revenge on him, he was not afraid either.

What he fears most is ignoring like air.Because that means, for the rest of his life, he and Qi Jingchen will have no intersection.There is no future without intersection.

Shen Zeming's eyes were red for a moment, he lowered his head silently, closed the door and left the room.

But during the few seconds when the door was closed, Shen Zeming couldn't restrain the wildly growing thoughts in his heart.He thought, if there is no love, it is good to have hatred.

Forgetting is the beginning of death, so he wants Qi Jingchen to hate him forever.