Peacock

I have heard Tang Ling being "always so self-righteous" more than once, and later I imitated their tone and said that Tang Ling is self-righteous, but in fact I have no experience at all.

But maybe I should be grateful for his self-righteousness now, because he was so sure that I was drunk that when I tried to tail him again, he didn't show the same vigilance as the day we first met.

I struggled to get up from the bed, put on my clothes and followed out.

After walking out of the Angel Dream, Tang Ling returned to the weedy river again, stood there and smoked three cigarettes.

So I finally saw what Sister Jinhua described to me: Tang Ling would nervously smoke one and eat a mint, repeating the cycle without knowing the end.

He seems to be like this all the time. When he is sick, he vomits and brushes his teeth once.

I don't know if it's related, but I suddenly remembered that Tang Ling had a strange habit, not to mention picky eaters. He even paid attention to drinking water: every time he drank a can, he could still hear a layer of water when he shook it. Noisy, has nothing to do with the container, the same with the cup - there always seems to be some left at the bottom.

I was very curious and kidnapped him with the morality of "extravagance and waste without shame".When I asked him, he was really overwhelmed by my question. He probably never thought about it. After thinking about it for a long time, he told me "maybe because he felt that the things he drank were not clean."

However, this kind of standard is only set by him, he can obviously finish the water in my glass.

I still can't understand this. Do people still despise themselves to such a state?

Walking like a god, Tang Ling washed his hands with river water several times, checked his phone, and turned to the other side of the county after confirming the time.

I silently followed behind him, trying not to let my steps sway, only then did I realize that although Tang Ling would look slumped when sitting, always slumped like a novice, but he walked Lu Lai's figure is very good-looking, and the word hunchback has nothing to do with him anymore. Every step he takes is bigger than ordinary people, and he looks extraordinarily light. I think he must have been a cat that could only split forks in his previous life.

He really didn't lie to me. When passing by the pharmacy, he turned in to buy alcohol medicine, passed through the vegetable market, hardware store and sausage noodle shop, and finally I followed him to the downstairs of a tube building in the north of the county. I became a lot more careful, this time I stayed far away, and I no longer recklessly let him find it easily.

This tube building is already a very old house at first glance, the paint on the walls has faded cleanly, and there are not many doors with clothes hanging in the corridor. I think everyone has moved to the house they repaired a long time ago. Those who choose to continue living here are very few.

Tang Ling looked up, as if she was looking for something, when she was about to step in, she suddenly turned around and walked out.

I thought I was caught by him again, and I squinted my eyes in fright when I hid in the corner, but I found that he just walked past me to the trash can outside the door. Alcohol and medicine were thrown in.

I secretly slandered a prodigal daughter-in-law.

As soon as he turned around, the voice-activated light on the first floor suddenly turned on, as if someone was coming down, I thought it was just an ordinary pedestrian, but I heard the middle-aged man say, "Is it you?"

Tang Ling seemed to be talking to him, but because of the distance, I couldn't hear the specific content clearly, and the middle-aged man in the gray-blue sports jacket spoke too loudly, but I could barely hear him response.

For some reason, the man's emotions suddenly became intense, and his anger melted into his voice. He raised his voice: "I will send you a house?! Don't you know that your father has done the same thing?"

"Didn't you dare to meet us all the time? I haven't even seen you except the day of the court. What do you mean by running here now?!"

It seemed that he hadn't shown his emotions like this for a long time. After the man finished yelling, he just stood there and breathed hard, and then fell down on the bench at the entrance of the building as if discouraged.

After a while, he spoke again, with a much calmer tone: "Just the year before last, your father's driver came to me again and said that you didn't actually do this. Is it true?"

Tang Ling's face was extremely pale, but she still didn't say anything.

The man leaned on his knees and said to himself: "...Her mother left early, and I was working outside, and her brother even sent her to the college entrance examination. She didn't pass the exam in the first year, and she repeated it for another year. It’s a lot of pressure, but I just started working there, and it’s really not the time to ask for leave. On the night before the exam, I heard that my colleague sent my son to the exam regardless. At that time, I felt really sorry for her. In the end, I called her. He also told me that it's okay, next year when she comes back from the winter vacation to celebrate the New Year together, and told me not to buy Spring Festival couplets, she will write them by herself when she comes back."

"Her brother is a bastard. He took women home when he was in junior high school. I didn't beat her because of this. I guess she was scared when she saw a lot when she was young, so she never mentioned this to us." The man scratched his finger "It's only now that I feel that if she really wants to tell me, I will definitely get angry with her. How dare she go to Guangzhou alone to find you."

"I've thought about it many times over the years, what would I say if I really saw you, how could I scold you, would I kill you?" The man's voice was deep, "As a result, these years have passed, I may be old Now, I began to feel that no matter how hard I tried, she would never come back, and sometimes I felt that as long as you came over and apologized, I might forgive you."

Tang Ling showed a look of astonishment, and was stunned for a long time, then slowly bowed deeply to the man, he just bent his body like that, the man sighed, and walked away from him.

Even though that figure had disappeared into the corner of the street, Tang Ling didn't straighten up.

I couldn't see the look on his face, but I knew by the end his whole shoulder was shaking.

I squinted my eyes uncomfortably, and handed over my weight to the strong railing in embarrassment.Breathing, too, became more difficult than ever.

This is always the case, Tang Ling took out his remaining self-righteousness, as if he wanted to transfer the big house on the bank of the Pearl River to the girl's father as compensation, irrationality and lack of respect to the extreme, tearing down the east wall can't make up for it western wall.

It was only later that I realized that in his subconscious mind, he must have thought that as long as he was the one who had nothing in the end, everything would be fine, and he didn't know who he was trying to torture with this kind of self-mutilation.

Tang Ling got his ending, but I felt that he seemed to be getting farther and farther away from liberation. He was competing with him in everything, and the unacceptable compensation had completely become a boundless punishment, so that he could never reach the port of freedom.

For no reason, I suddenly had a feeling of "end".

It's over, for Tang Ling, it seems that everything is over, he was successfully abandoned by the only family member in the world who needed to depend on him, he successfully pushed me away who has been stalking me, and he also successfully obtained the so-called forgiveness.

The strong uneasiness was stronger than any earthquake I experienced, and my head was as muddy as a puddle of alcohol. At this moment, I tried to think about what he would do next from Tangling's perspective, but In the end, I still couldn’t think of anything. I cried anxiously, and even started to beat my head nervously. In the end, I could only squat in the same place helplessly. So heavy on top of my head, I felt like I was suffocating.

I didn't want Tang Ling to find out that I was making my own decisions again, so I ran back one step ahead of him.

It turned out that I didn’t know the way as well as I imagined. After running past the landmark pharmacy in my memory, I was a little lost. I just found Angel Dream based on my intuition. Fortunately, although I made a detour, I finally returned to the destination .

I knew that Angel Dream was a normal karaoke hall, but I never thought it would be so normal. There is not even a night show. The neon light sign at the gate at [-]:[-] is extinguished like neon gas leaking, leaving only a road in the backyard leading directly to the second hall. The road to the rest room on the second floor is still bright.

Looking at the loose staircase, I sat down on the bottom step in silence.

While waiting for Tangling, maybe I was really bored, or maybe I just needed something to divert my attention. When I saw the fruit plate on the common table next to me, I started picking the fruit knife and peeling it without thinking. up the apple.

It's kind of funny to say that I had never peeled fruit myself before, and because of this inexperience, I ended up ruining that apple like a post-war urban ground, and the flaky peel fell between my legs in pieces , It became completely discarded fragmented shell casings.

Tangling is different from me.

That was also the first time I became interested in the ordinary act of peeling an apple. I remember he was half leaning against the window of the Zen room, looking at me while pulling out a funnel from the top and tail of the apple. , so the uniform and continuous peel began to leak from his tiger's mouth, as silky as a pink ribbon.

Looking back, there are all signs that I started to develop something called "curiosity" after I met him.

In the past, let alone observing people peeling fruit patiently, even when I attended my grandma’s funeral, I didn’t have any inquisitive thoughts. I just put on black clothes and black pants like a puppet, and pretended to be a god stake. One day, my parents' relatives and friends came to me and asked me what happened to my grandma. I really didn't know, so I just shook my head like a fool, and then continued to stand like that.

It was the same after I went to the United States. Every day when I had breakfast, my family used to broadcast the morning news, and I always heard that there were wars raging somewhere, and disasters happened somewhere.The American dad's body fluids are fat and Mexican blood, and he is much more sensitive to turmoil than we are, so he often publishes long speeches of compassion during this time period, but I haven't been sporadically affected by it for so long. I just felt that it was none of my business how the world exploded and turned upside down. After thinking about it for a long time, I inevitably doubted myself, so I began to think again: Then what else could have anything to do with me?

I didn't find the answer until I met Tang Ling.

I realized that I made a mistake in the free country that day. I didn't find three-quarters of the free country there, but one and two hundred percent.Tang Ling is those hands, holding the world with one hand, and me with the other. Only then did I have the opportunity to formally shake hands and negotiate peace with it, just like two wires are put together, and dazzling sparks are born.

All because I met Tang Ling.