[Zhongyingmei] The clown is actually me

"You said you're not mentally ill,? You're just driven crazy by these illegal drugs?" The doctor said as he pulled down his glasses to look at Jack, with a look of surprise that made the latter uncomfortable, like looking at a donkey wearing a top hat .

"Yes." Jack nodded.

The doctor put the glasses back on: "Mr. Napier,? Orsher's illegal drug - the bottle of belladonna tablets you mentioned,? No mental damage claims, on the surface it just makes you belladonna Alkalosis, even if it did cause neurological damage to you, we can't submit a report. The report has no legal force,? And you can't prove that you took the medicine bottle made by Olscher Pharmaceuticals. "

"But it's true."

"What about the evidence? You can't even produce a prescription,? Who knows if you're not falsifying your experience and defrauding the government of subsidies?"

"My medicine bottle is still there,? Jenny can also testify."

The doctor sighed: "The pill bottle does not prove that you have actually taken this drug,? Your wife Jenny... I am afraid she refuses to testify for you,? She once expressed 'very regret marrying you'. And she is the family Victims of violence,? We go door-to-door and ask? It may attract the Women and Children's Federation,? One of their jobs is to help victims stay away from their perpetrators."

Jack opened his mouth: "But..."

"Mr. Napier, have you forgotten? You sought medical treatment because of delusions, not mental illness after taking medicine." The doctor said slowly, like a primary school teacher correcting a child's wrong pronunciation , "You can't prove that the belladonna tablets are directly related to your mental illness, so naturally you can't get this 'Olscher incident subsidy'."

Jack lowered his head, and there was an unprecedentedly long silence.In the world of Batman, he never bothered about money,? Not for a second did he think about,? How many dollars a month would be spent just for treatment in Arkham Asylum.The money was all paid by the government, maybe the Wayne Group also borne part of it. No one would ask him about the cost of his treatment. They only hoped that Jack would stay in the cage peacefully.If he is short of money, he can either rob a convenience store with a toy gun, or ask Batman for it.Anyway, Bruce Wayne has plenty of money, and the difference between $1000 and $10000 is just a few zeros for him.

damn it.

Jack felt dizzy for a while, and at this moment, he thought of forging Wayne Group checks.In the past, he had written a random number on the check, and then skillfully signed Bruce Wayne's name.As the world's greatest detective, Batman must have known he was the one to write these checks, but he's been turning a blind eye to paying for checks he never signed.

The only time Batman broke him was because he was in a panic and had a whim to try how much money Bruce's check could draw, so he forged a check for $450 million and handed it to the bank.The check was thrown at him three hours later by Batman, who told Jack that he had paid Jack at least $30 in bills.

Are these... all fake?

He felt a splitting headache, a strong sense of vomiting hit his back, and the dizziness caused by suffocation made him lean back weakly in the chair.He has been told several times during electroshock therapy that all previous memories are false and his delusions.

Jack didn't want to recall the process of electroshock treatment. The current passing through the brain was like [-] needles being squeezed into the brain at the same time, or someone smashing the temple with a giant hammer.And it is different from other pains in that the latter will pass out after exceeding a certain threshold. After passing out, you will no longer feel the pain, but the severe pain caused by the electric shock will always exist.Jack persisted for three hours in the agony of burning childbirth—the psychiatrist praised his useless firmness, and the average patient stopped clinging to their fantasies after ten seconds of trying.But Jack was still defeated. He had to lie against his will, admitting that Batman, Joker, Harley, Jason...they didn't really exist.

He suspected that electroshock therapy had damaged his brain even more than Belladonna tablets, because frequent electrotherapy had fragmented his memory, and he also began to doubt whether that memory was real, but it was undeniable that it was the sudden paranoia that made him suffer. His family was broken, he was alone, and he was destitute.

—Yes, he is already down and out.

After the divorce, Jenny took away most of the property. When he was receiving drug treatment in the mental hospital, the number on the savings card decreased bit by bit. After he overdrafted three credit cards, he could no longer pay one. Penny.Originally, the Orsher Company was seized, and the government and the Food and Drug Administration would provide financial subsidies to the victims of the illegal drugs taken by the Orsher Company, but Jack obviously could not get the qualification, he could only get the treatment for belladonna alkaloid poisoning Reimbursement unless he can prove his mental illness was caused by that box of belladonna pills.

Jack was wearing the suit before he was admitted to the hospital. This suit had been piled in the luggage bag for a long time. It was a little crumpled and had an old smell.Now he is just a penniless and embarrassing man, no longer a system-enhanced and glorious Gotham legend, he bowed his head deeply in front of the expensive hospitalization and medical expenses, and said to the doctor: " please."

He doesn't miss this hospital, but he understands what will happen when he walks out of the hospital gate.He will be homeless, the house has been taken away by the court, and he is still labeled as a mentally ill person. Just because of this alone, few workplaces are willing to take him.Even if there was, a bond of about $150 would have to be paid before the job, proving he wouldn't run away after a week's pay.Moreover, if you want a stable job, you must have a house. Both the real estate certificate and the rental contract are fine. You also need to pay six months’ rent in advance to rent a house. This is like a natural barrier for people without funds.Of course, there are motels or capsule hotels that are settled on a weekly and daily basis, but these hotels are generally more expensive than renting a house. The weekly rent of a motel in Queens is 160 US dollars, which translates to 640 yuan a month, while renting a house only costs 400 US dollars. about.That's why there are always poor people living in motels, because they can't find a place to rent if they can't pay the deposit, and they are squeezed by the high rent of the hotel. They can't save money, and the more they live, the poorer they live.

The government has community insurance for the homeless, which is only enough for daily life, and only for those who do not have a job.Once he has a job, he will lose this subsidy.Things have fallen into an endless loop like this: If you want to save money, you have to find a job, and to find a job you have to have a house, renting a house requires you to have a starting capital, and community insurance will never save enough money.In this way, if you don’t have at least 2500 US dollars as a starting capital in this city, even if you are young, have hands and feet, have a higher education, and have corresponding professional skills, you can only be a homeless person. .

Jack rummaged through his pockets, only to find a roll of $30 bills and several credit cards that had been swiped to a negative amount.

"Don't be so miserable, old man. It's not hopeless, at least psychotropic drugs are distributed for free." The doctor said, turning his pen, "You can go to the window every month to get it."

"You let me return to society before I recover? I'm a mental patient."

"How many modern people are not mentally ill? Depression, mania, control freak, exhibitionism/vaginity/addiction...everyone looks the same. If all of you live in a mental hospital, the corridors will have no ground."

Jack looked into the doctor's eyes, he was sure the doctor knew what would happen after he went out, but he didn't care, he didn't care whether Jack went begging or went homeless, or went to the kitchen to wash dishes after he went out.Just like what he said, there are a lot of mentally ill patients like Jack every year. They are unable to work and are a burden on society. These high-ranking people don't care about their lives.

"Aren't you afraid that I will go out to retaliate against the society?"

The doctor flipped through the newspaper nonchalantly, rolled his eyes, and burst out laughing.He slapped an old medieval pistol/gun on the table, and said casually: "There are riots outside these days, it's very dangerous, take this."

Jack slowly picked up the pistol/gun. This pistol/gun looked like it was made in the last century. It was so old that its parts were falling apart. It doesn't even have value as a collectible, so shooting with this gun might just blow up the chamber.There are no bullets in the chamber, only empty magazines, which is why the doctor dared to give him his hand/gun.

European and American countries do not ban guns, but ban bullets.Guns were cheap, a middle class family could get them, the real expensive thing was the bullets.

Jack suddenly had the urge to shoot the doctor, but he didn't because the doctor wasn't the one who prescribed the belladonna tablets, and because there were no bullets in the magazine.So he just picked up the pistol, silently put it in the duffel bag, and walked out of the hospital.

The sky is bright.

Facing the white light, what Jack thought of was not Jenny, the clown, or belladonna, but the blank checkbook that Batman threw to him.Every check has Bruce Wayne's signature, and Batman told him: Write a number if you want money, but it's best not to exceed $10000 at a time.

is he real

Jack walked silently across the street, back to the familiar apartment, the place he once called home, which was now occupied by someone else.He stood at the door and listened for a while, but the neighbor still turned on the TV so loudly, and there was still cat feces in the corridor, and he left without a sound, like a ghost.No one greets him, and the mental patient is a ghost floating in the city.

He found a bar and sat down in the corner, leaning against the wall, with a closed window beside him, far away from the crowd, and covered by curtains.The boss obviously saw a lot of people like him who had a bad life and drank too much, and he didn't give him a surprised look at his choice to live alone, which made him feel better.The boss kindly served him wine and presented him with a plate of cooked shrimp as an appetizer, and told him not to open the window, which had been in disrepair for a long time and could only be locked with a chain.

Just at this time, the rain began to fall, and the bean-sized raindrops crackled on the window, making the sound of drums.

Jack sat in the corner for a while without taking a sip of his wine.He just drew the curtain, hid himself in the dark, then took out the middle-aged pistol from the bag, slowly opened the safety, pulled the bolt, put the muzzle of the gun against his chin, and closed the gun. Eye.