Shocked in late autumn

The phone rang, and a magnetic female voice sang, "①After talking about all the faces, I'm still waiting for a momentary heartbeat."

It was Jiao Anpu, whom they all loved, whose elegant singing broke away the tranquility and loveliness.

It also woke up the two people who were about to kiss, just like being caught stealing candy when they were young, Ji Songlin blinked his eyes, his eyelashes trembling slightly, he sat up hurriedly as if waking up from a dream, and turned his back to Xu Chenyu. Dare to look at him again.

Ji Songlin's chest rose and fell, and he immediately sorted out his chaotic thoughts, his head spinning for a while.

The atmosphere became more subtle and quickly spread in the air, and the ringing was still endless.

Xu Chenyu sat up, touched the tip of his nose, and coughed lightly: "You can also answer the phone in the dark room, just turn down the light to the lowest level."

"okay."

An appropriate sentence relieved the embarrassment of the silence, and they seemed to have returned to their original appearance, with careful thoughts on each other, slowly probing, solemn and cautious.

Ji Songlin answered the phone. It was the neighbor next door, Uncle Zhang. The other end seemed to be in confusion, and he couldn't hear clearly: "Where are you? Don't worry, just speak slowly."

Xu Chenyu silently cleaned up the wet photo paper on the ground, the messy equipment, and the dropped utensils.

Ji Songlin was holding the phone, listening to the rambling voice on the other end of the phone, his brain went blank for a moment, and his body was limp and weak.

When Xu Chenyu saw Ji Songlin's face turned when he hung up the phone, he felt bad, and he put down what he was doing.

"What happened?"

"My grandma fainted...in Union Hospital..."

Ji Songlin left a word, got up suddenly, forgot to say goodbye, opened the door in a panic and rushed out.Xu Chenyu immediately chased him out, and before going out, he put on the light gray overcoat.

The walls of the hospital were blindingly white, and the corridor was filled with the smell of disinfectant. An elderly man in a dark blue Chinese tunic suit was pacing back and forth in front of the ward.

"Grandpa Zhang," Ji Songlin ran over, with cold sweat hanging from the side of his face, sliding past his resolute outline: "how is my grandma, where is she?"

The old man looked up, and saw Ji Songlin looking anxious, followed by a young man of the same age, Xu Chenyu bowed slightly, and greeted the old man, which was regarded as a greeting.

"You're here," Grandpa Zhang pointed to the pane, where an old man lay unconscious: "In the emergency room, doctors and nurses are here...I just had dinner tonight and I'm going out for a walk. When your grandma passed out, I rushed her to the hospital." Seeing Ji Songlin's anxious face, he comforted him and said, "Don't worry too much, we'll wait for the test results to come out."

"She was fine when I went out, why did she faint suddenly?"

Distraught, Ji Songlin's voice was three times higher than usual, echoing in the long and straight corridor, making a loud noise.

Grandpa Zhang twitched the corners of his mouth, looked at the glass window with blue curtains, and said mockingly: "When people get old, their body functions decline. They were lively and jumping in the last second, but who knows what will happen in the next second."

The old man’s name is Zhang Huaizong. He lives in the same alley with them. He is a neighbor and an old friend of his grandmother. He lives alone in a courtyard house. , inevitably a little deserted.

Ji Songlin's grandmother has long since retired. In her spare time, she likes to think about two dishes. Every time she researches a new dish, she will make an extra serving and ask her grandson to send it to the elderly living alone opposite. As his health got worse, when Ji Songlin went out, he asked Zhang Huaizong to take care of him.

As soon as the sunset glowed in the sky, Zhang Huaizong went out for a walk as usual, and saw the open gate of the opposite courtyard from a distance. Through the gap, he saw Ji Songlin's grandmother passed out on the ground, and quickly dialed 120. The medical staff arrived in time and sent the old man to the hospital. hospital.

Young people can't deeply understand the sadness brought by "oldness". Their hair is graying, memory loss, the passion that once burned their bodies is gone, and their bodies are getting heavier. For the elderly, every day may be the last day. Be cruel, the end of life is destruction.

The nurse opened the door of the ward, revealing half of her face. She looked serious: "What are you shouting about?" and pointed to the red letter above her head: "The ward is heavy, please don't make any noise!"

Before she had time to ask her about her situation, the nurse closed the white door, ruthlessly shutting out Ji Songlin's concern and worries.

Xu Chenyu followed Ji Songlin and patted him on the back: "It will be fine, don't panic."

The sky was dark, looking at the sandals on Zhang Huaizong's feet, Ji Songlin realized that he was impolite, he said gratefully and ashamedly: "I'm sorry, Grandpa, I'm really thankful for having you today. It's too late, I'll take you home first .”

A flash of lightning flashed across the sky, and the air smelled like a storm. Zhang Huaizong waved his hand, telling him not to be polite: "Since you're here, I won't stay any longer. The windows at home are not closed yet."

Ji Songlin took a last look at the ward. Grandma was still awake, and he was still very worried, like a cloud of mist that could not be blown away, tightly blocking his heart.

"Don't worry, I'll watch over here." Xu Chenyu put on the light gray coat directly on Ji Songlin, and added another sentence at the end: "It's going to rain, be careful of catching cold."

Ji Songlin glanced at him, that glance contained too many things, but he didn't have time to recollect it, Zhang Huaizong was worried that the heavy rain was coming, so he urged a few words, Ji Songlin had no choice but to stride towards the elevator entrance.

Halfway through the walk, Ji Songlin turned his head suddenly, and happened to meet Xu Chenyu's gaze.

As if knowing what the person on the other side was thinking, Xu Chenyu patted his chest, smiled and mouthed: "Don't worry, I'm here!"

His thoughts were stabilized by the phrase "you have me", looking into Xu Chenyu's eyes, Ji Songlin knew that this person was reliable.

Ji Songlin forced a smile, there was still worry in the corners of his eyes and brows, but he took a step and really left.

It was already two o'clock in the morning when we returned to the hospital again, the moon was shining brightly in the sky, and it was raining lightly outside the window. Looking out through the glass window, the lights were brightly lit, and the raindrops reflected a strange light.

On the bench in the corridor, sat a quiet young man, staring at the direction of the ward, just sitting like this.

One autumn rain and one cold, the night wind came in, the cold made Xu Chenyu shiver, he was still wearing a thin white T-shirt, which couldn't block the chill, he folded his arms and rubbed them, looking a little funny , Quail-like.

When he looked up, he saw Ji Songlin standing on the other side, holding a denim jacket in his arms.

Looking around, there is a long corridor between the two.

Ji Songlin has never had such a feeling. In his memory, there is only an old man who is staggering and waiting for him. Among so many lights, only the one of his grandmother lights up for him.

At this moment, he looked at Xu Chenyu from a distance, and felt a miraculous feeling in his chest, called a sense of satisfaction. He felt a little bit of warmth while worrying.

Ji Songlin walked to Xu Chenyu's side, and put on a denim jacket for him when he sat down: "Aren't you awake yet?"

Xu Chenyu covered his mouth and nose, and yawned: "I'm awake, and I'm still infusion. The doctor said that I fainted suddenly due to high blood pressure. My mother-in-law needs to rest. Let us wait an hour before entering the ward."

On the way here, Ji Songlin predicted that the worst outcome would be cerebral infarction, and when he heard the word high blood pressure, his high-suspended heart finally let go.

Ji Songlin didn't say thank you, but asked him: "The cold wind has been blowing for so long, remember to take some medicine when you get home, don't catch a cold."

Xu Chenyu took out a tissue and said like the second time we met: "Don't worry about me, there is cold sweat all over your forehead, wipe it off."

Ji Songlin took it, resting his elbows on his knees, the shirt on his body was still wet, mixed with sweat, his back was sticky.

Xu Chenyu stared at the scar on his arm, struggled for a moment, and asked, "What's the matter with the injury on your arm? It looks...a bit serious?"

"I accidentally fell when I was a child." Ji Songlin turned his arm, and he smiled: "Men, it's okay to have some scars." Yu Xi was facing him.

The drizzle was dripping and knocking on the window lattice. Ji Songlin didn't like rainy days and cold and damp. When he was seven years old, he experienced a sudden rainstorm, which has not stopped until now.The coldness will make him feel restless, amidst the sound of rain, Ji Songlin's eyes fell on the hideous scar, he narrowed his eyes slightly, and fell into the vortex of the past.

After his mother passed away, Ji Songlin lived with his grandmother in a small courtyard house, which was an old house handed down from his ancestors.

Siheyuan is located in an old street, and the lingering dampness floats in the air. There are wreath shops, old-fashioned barber shops, and small stalls selling barbecue on the street. These old buildings are covered with a dull luster. It is all of Ji Songlin's childhood memories.

Ji Songlin has a special kind of precocious wisdom. He knows that it is not easy for his grandmother to make money, so he usually saves money on food and expenses. Every day after school, he would walk along the street, and the setting sun stretched his thin shadow obliquely.

It's not for walking or having fun, but to pick up empty bottles. He bent down to pick up plastic bottles and carefully put them into a transparent bag. He still remembers that three empty bottles can earn a dime.

He had met a lot of ridicule. The gangsters who lived on the same street were in groups of three or four. They often followed Ji Songlin, booing, and calling him an oil bottle, or a little mute.

Ji Songlin ignored him at first, the outside world had nothing to do with him, he often felt that he was an outsider in this world.

The dislike of adolescents comes out of nowhere, maybe it's because they don't like that person, maybe it's because that person is different.In short, they competed with Ji Songlin. Seeing that Ji Songlin didn't respond, the gangsters couldn't appreciate all kinds of feelings, and their hearts were filled with anger.

A 15-year-old gangster with a thick head and a thick head, with a blunt jaw and a bony body, like a thin bamboo pole, he is the "big brother" in the group.

Thin bamboo pole had a low-quality cigarette dangling from his mouth, his eyes were slanted, and he pointed at Ji Songlin: "Hey, the trash picker...it's you, come here."

Ji Songlin looked back at them, indifferent and alienated, he picked up the bottle on the ground and walked away.

The thin bamboo pole is a well-known thorn in this street. He calls himself a "big brother" and has never seen a "grandson" who disrespects him so much. It feels like a hard punch, but it hits the cotton , and the rest of the gangsters whispered to each other, lest the world would not be chaotic.

The thin bamboo pole couldn't hold back his face, he yelled: "You are fucking deaf, if you dare to take another step, I will break your leg."

Ji Songlin paused, and the thin bamboo pole saw him 'obedient', and just when a smile appeared on his face, he saw Ji Songlin bent down to pick up a plastic bottle, packed it, and walked forward without looking back.

"This little brat has quite a personality." said a little gangster.

"You're pretending to be deaf, you don't pay attention to our boss at all." Another gangster stepped forward and said again.

For the sake of the so-called "face", the thin bamboo pole rushed up and snatched the plastic bag from Ji Songlin's hand: "Yo, I didn't expect you to be not only dumb, but also deaf, you little trash, what are you pretending to be noble."

Ji Songlin is short in stature, probably due to malnutrition, he is much behind his peers in stature, with a stern face, he said coldly, "Give it back to me!"

"Want to go back?" Thin Bamboo Pole looked proud, pointed to the floor, and smiled maliciously: "Okay, kneel down and call me big brother, and I'll give it back to you."

Deceiving too much.

Ji Songlin didn't speak, just stared at him fiercely, his provocative eyes angered Shouzhugan, as the only "big brother" in the old street, Shouzhugan felt offended.

"What are you looking at? Believe it or not, I'll dig out your eyes!"

Ji Songlin still didn't say a word, just stared at him like this: "Give it back to me."

Those eyes were dark and heavy, and the thin bamboo poles were so shaky, he actually had a feeling that he had encountered a wolf or a tiger in the suburbs, but the constant booing behind him fueled the flames of vanity.

"Brother, this kid can't understand human words, so teach him a lesson." The little gangster who fanned the flames raised a face covered in snot.

"That's right, the eyes grow on the top of the head, what are you pulling?"

From the point of view of size, the dwarf is not threatening at all. Amidst the incitement and ridicule, the thin bamboo pole simply threw the bag away, and the wolf pounced on him, wrestling with Ji Songlin.

Ji Songlin was pushed to the ground, and his left arm happened to hit the sharp bluestone slab, with a crash, a bloody mouth opened, and the blood flowed in pools.

The hooligans caught the plastic bags thrown in the air, and everyone scrambled to snatch the waste bottles first, and they were thrown away in a blink of an eye like drums and sticks.

Plastic bottles were scattered around, some were trampled to pieces, some rolled down the gutter, Ji Songlin was enraged, his eyes were red, his limbs were combined, he tried his best to struggle on the cold floor, with all his strength, he turned over and rode on the On the waist of the thin bamboo pole, his whole body's muscles were tense, and when he raised his hand, he punched hard, making the thin bamboo pole full of blood from his nose.

Ji Songlin's face turned pale, and the blood all over his body gathered in those eyes, like an irritated little wild wolf.

The group of gangsters behind him rushed up, the crowd covered his small body, they punched and kicked him, Ji Songlin didn't shout or shout, but he resisted desperately, as if desperate, picked up the things he could pick up, and threw them at him .

"Damn kids, what are you doing? How dare you gather people to fight in front of my house."

The little gangster was not afraid when he saw a stunned young man coming, and continued to boo in the chaos.

Zhang Huaizong shouted loudly: "If you don't leave, I will call the police."

After saying this, he ran over with a stick and scolded those annoying guys.

"Fuck you, the old man is meddling in his own business, he will kill his son sooner or later."

"You still dare to scold me, let's see if I don't beat you to death."

The gangsters used their arms to block the bamboo sticks, and they were beaten until they screamed in pain. Everyone was beaten several times, and they seemed to scatter like birds and beasts.

The thin bamboo pole rubbed his face swollen into a pig's head, before leaving, he spat and said viciously: "Be careful, don't let me see you in the future, or I will beat you every time I see you."

Ji Songlin dragged his injured body to get up, touched the nosebleed, thanked Zhang Huaizong politely, bent down to pick up the empty bottles one by one, grabbed the plastic bags with his immature hands, and tied a knot.

The little boy wiped off the dirt and dust on his clothes, put down his sleeves to cover up the scars, and walked towards home step by step, with his spine straight and magnanimous.

That hideous scar remained on Ji Songlin's arm forever.

The physical injury was on the surface and could not pierce his heart, but when grandma found out, she cried secretly for several days. She kept the bottle from that day and was not willing to sell it.

Those tears were like heavy stones, smashing into Ji Songlin's heart, causing earth-shaking ripples that could not be calmed down for a long time.

Childhood was full of gloom. Every time he passed that alley, Ji Songlin would always hold the plastic bag in his hand tightly and run over like a [-]-meter sprint. He hated those gangsters and was afraid of them at the same time, but he pretended not to be afraid every time. , as if it would not be defeated.

Ji Songlin endured bullying and insults until a year later, when the skinny "big brother" moved, his life gradually returned to peace.

The suffering of youth has been washed away by the years, like a pair of boiled Chinese medicine, although it is bitter, but it leaves a lingering fragrance. Looking back, there are thorns and harvest in growth. Time amber will always remove dross, solidify tenacity, and return him An unhurried soul.

There was a rumbling sound, thunder and bombardment, and then the rain became heavier, pulling Ji Songlin back from his thoughts.

Xu Chenyu saw Ji Songlin's dark brow hiding, so he couldn't help stretching out his hand, holding his wrist, and said comfortingly: "Mother-in-law is lucky, she will be worried when she sees you like this."

Ji Songlin lowered his eyes and listened, fisting his fists. Although he looked extremely calm on the outside, his frowning could not help revealing some clues.

Xu Chenyu observed his expression, and said softly, "Fortunately, it's not a cerebral infarction. High blood pressure can be controlled as long as you take medicine on time."

Ji Songlin slightly parted his lips, turned his head and said, "It doesn't matter, I'm fine."

"Then just smile."

Ji Songlin was taken aback for a moment, he suddenly remembered that when he was a child, his grandmother coaxed him, and would also joke and laugh, then he raised the corners of his mouth and pulled it out a little.

"No, you don't usually smile like this," Xu Chenyu boldly stretched out his fingertips and raised the corner of his mouth: "That's right."

The light above his head showed a warm yellow color, illuminating Xu Chenyu's eyebrows and eyes. His appearance was a bit childish, but his expression was so tender that water could be squeezed out.

The two faced each other, their eyes met, they were not too close, but they could clearly feel each other's breath.

Ji Songlin really laughed.

The looseness fades away, and the brightness peels off.

The author says:

①From the lyrics of Jiao Anpu's "City".