conspiracy news agency

So, when this beautiful woman with jet-black flowing waist-length hair was sitting across from me, I didn't know that my life would be because the bowl in front of me was really not good. Eat Oden and change.

Because I think that although I am pretty good-looking, it is by no means to the extent that I was approached by such a beautiful woman on the first night of entering the university, so even under the scorching gaze of the girl opposite, I absolutely will not pay attention

Force takes a step away from oden.

Until there were no ingredients left in the soup base in my bowl, and I even drank the last soup as a last resort.The saltiness brought to my throat by the inferior soup made me feel hot from the heart to the mouth.Of course, it might be the other way around.

In any case, I've finished a large oden with udon noodles.There is no coincidence or excuse to pretend that the big sister opposite is not staring at me all the time.

I had to look away, and the moment I raised my head, I met the eyes of the girl across from me.

If I have to rate the women I know in real life, the one in front of me will definitely get nine points.Because I am the type of person who believes that the future will definitely be better, so I never give anyone a ten.But in fact, I don't have a perverted hobby of impressing women I don't know casually, so the nine points here are just to describe how powerful the beauty in front of me is in the eyes of a male college student with normal physical development. .

At the moment when I met my eyes, I had imagined countless possibilities.For example, have we met somewhere before, or is this my long-lost sister, or... this is someone I know who came to play a joke on me.

In the end, I came to the conclusion through my rational judgment: In any case, just pretend that you didn’t see it.

Although I followed my rational judgment, I immediately picked up the bowls and chopsticks on the table and stood up.However, maybe it was because my thoughts were not clear enough, I actually felt so reluctant to part with this big beauty the moment I stood up.If the beautiful woman stood up and stopped me at this time, maybe my college life would really unfold like "On Campus".

I always feel that there should be a "but, nothing happened".At least according to the general development of the real world, this kind of development is reasonable. After all, I am just an ordinary freshman in North Korea University. This is neither a science fiction novel nor a shooting scene of a pure love movie in Japan.

However, she spoke at this time.

The word "but" did appear, but it was not what I expected.

Senior sister's voice is as gentle as her beauty, because when she said that sentence, I was not facing her, so I imagined her lips slightly parted in my mind.

"Six minutes and 32 seconds."

The sweet voice floating from those cherry-like lips said so.

"what?"

If she just said something that I can understand, such as saying to me with pitiful red eye circles and cheeks, "Feite, can you stay tonight?"... I will go away immediately Rational judgment.However, it was really beyond my expectation to say a time suddenly, which made my rationality unable to make the most sensible choice for a while.

So I turned around and stood there blankly looking at her, speculating about her identity and purpose.Is it my senior?At least that's what I think. Although the appearance doesn't look too obvious, but in terms of aura and tone of voice, I don't think he is a freshman like me.The remaining soup on the oden bowl in hand flows into the fingertips along the edge, bringing an unpleasant feeling, maybe it's the other way around.

"Six minutes and 32 seconds~"

As if to make me confirm the number, she repeated it again.At this time, I didn't understand that this was actually a powerful enchantment chanting spell, otherwise I would have escaped from the casting area before the enchantment was completed.

"I was asking, what does that mean..."

The senior sister suddenly looked at me directly with her eyes. If I had to describe the appearance of this senior sister in detail, then I could say that she has long black hair, white skin like snow, and passionate lips. And those charming and playful eyes that seduced his father and queen who killed his mother 300 years ago.

"Anyway, this is just the reason for my clumsy counter-accusation, so in fact, you don't have to care what the digital time means."

When the senior sister said this, her voice was low and slightly hoarse, [while] standing up while I was not paying attention, she was not much shorter than me.The perfect height difference allows her to spread her unique fragrance on my face when she smiles at me.

I couldn't help swallowing, because the opponent finally played the cards according to the routine, so I also recovered a little bit of normal judgment: "Sorry, I'm not that kind of person."

Senpai's expression changed, and she put on a high-ranking posture. Although she was not taller than me in height, she was able to look at me with contempt from the highest point that didn't seem to exist.Sure enough, there is still a whole food chain between me and this person in front of me.

"Did you really think that you would be so handsome that you would be approached by the strongest senpai like me on the first day of school?"

Senior sister, actually I didn’t think so, it was Your Highness the Queen who said the three words.However, in order to take into account the pride of the senior in front of me, it is of course impossible for me to say that directly.

"I... didn't mean that..."

"Oh?" The senior interrupted my explanation with an unquestionable tone of doubt, "That is to say, your sexual orientation is the type that won't accept girls' reverse approach?"

I felt that the noisy voices in the cafeteria seemed to have stopped, and at least ten sharp eye knives were stuck in my fragile back.

"That's not what I mean, I mean..."

"Kidding."

Senior sister's lips are turned up. Although she still has such fascinating facial features, after confirming that there is something unknown hidden under this beautiful appearance, I always feel that the corners of the upturned mouth may not be a smile but a smile. A sign of fire.

"Whether you accidentally revealed your sexuality just now, or you said I was hitting on the opposite side, it's all a joke. My point is actually six minutes and 32 seconds."

So there is nothing wrong with my sexuality at all!No one is needed to "explore".

I felt that such complaints would not have any effect, so I raised the question for the third time, what does that time mean.In fact, I have almost lost even that curiosity.So far, my only thought is how to get rid of the current predicament immediately.

However, the fact is that the enchantment called reverse pickup has already been completed between me and her.Until she achieves her goal, it is impossible for me to walk out of this terrifying social circle without damage.

The huge sunset casts light into the cafeteria through the floor-to-ceiling windows, and the mottled shadows of the branches draw the shape of a cage on the ground.In fact, there are still noisy sounds from the university cafeteria around me, but in such an atmosphere, those sounds seem to automatically become a white wall that separates me from the real world.

What is that called?Ah, yes... white noise.The white noise coming from all directions surrounded me and my senior in the only small space left.

The senior sister motioned for me to sit down. Although I was unwilling in every possible way, it was as if I couldn't quit halfway through the fight against the Four Heavenly Kings. Now I have no other choice.The only regret is that I didn't know that bargaining with the oden boss turned out to be the key plot to trigger the boss battle, so I didn't save it.

If I die at this point, I hope someone can write this in the guide.

After I finally sat down hesitantly, the senior sister also sat down, and slowly reached into her pocket with one hand, making gestures to take out something.With a self-defeating mentality, I began to expect that the best thing she took out of her pocket would be something like a soul gem.

However, this time it was an unexpectedly normal development.What was pulled out from the senior sister's white skirt was a very stylish mobile phone.

It is not the most popular ○Phone touch model, but a long flip phone that many girls prefer to use.

After confirming this point, I always feel that the danger of the person in front of me is slightly reduced.It's about the level of poppy down to canna.

However, this did not give me a sigh of relief.Since she started flipping through her phone on her own, I was in an awkward situation.

"that……"

If there is nothing else, can I just leave first?

I wanted to say this but before I could finish, I was interrupted by the loud noise of my senior closing the phone. The sound was so loud that even the barrier of white noise was disturbed by it for an instant.

"I kept you waiting for a long time, but with your personality, it doesn't matter if you wait a little longer."

It's really rude, don't think that you can say such things that hurt other people's self-esteem just because you are a senior.

"In terms of self-esteem, you do have a little bit, but it's not enough to drive you to contradict me."

It's getting too much... wait, why does she know that I'm thinking about self-esteem.

The elder sister's expression was ambiguous and dangerous, holding her face in her hand and gently shaking the pink flip phone in her hand:

"I know everything about Xiaofeng, because I have been watching Xiaofeng~"

Oh, so it turns out that what you are holding is Luo Haofeng's diary.

"Senior sister, I have actually been patient for a long time. Even for a person with mediocre self-esteem, if you make such silly jokes again, I can only pretend that I don't know you."

After finishing speaking, I realized that something was wrong, because I didn't know her at all.

The senior sister finally put away the pretending expression on her hippie smile, and began to say with a little seriousness: "Okay, enough trouble is enough, and your reaction is basically in line with my previous guess. So, as an ordinary person, You pass."

"What qualifications? What ordinary people?" In fact, I still want to know what that time means, but because the other party ignored me three times, I don't want to ask anymore.

"Six minutes and 32 seconds, the time it takes for you to eat a large amount of oden with udon noodles and drink the soup."

Maybe it's because the senior sister's expression was too serious when she said this sentence, which caused me to fail to understand the huge amount of information hidden in this sentence.

"what?"

"Most people will finish a bowl of oden with the same amount in 5 minutes to 32 and a half minutes, and your 90.00 minutes and [-] seconds happens to be in the middle of this [-]% five-confidence interval, which is the apex of the normal distribution."

Ah, senior sister, I'm still a freshman, please don't use those proper nouns that sound mysterious, okay?

"In other words, you are an ordinary diner." The senior sister continued after explaining in concise vernacular, "and not only that, your reaction after I spoke to you was also ordinary. After I continued to talk to you After a few mild jokes, the transition from initial curiosity to later anger was pretty average. As you say yourself, you have an average level of self-esteem and an average level of tolerance. Gotta To put it bluntly, you are an ordinary person who is too ordinary to be an ordinary person. Even if you come to this slightly above-average school through some unusual efforts, you will still return to the life track of ordinary people without the help of external forces. "

After the senior sister finished saying these words like a cannonball, she cast her eyes out of the window, as if I was a passerby who was so ordinary that it was not worth even looking at it again.

"I think this is beyond the scope of my "normal" endurance, senior." I suppressed my anger and dropped this sentence, and immediately picked up the dishes and prepared to leave.The white noise that originally formed the wall quickly disintegrated under the burning of the anger to make way for my normal college life.

"Ah, I also feel that your normal level of endurance is about to run out. So in order to keep you listening, I decided to consume your normal level of curiosity. You must be wondering why I came to you, right? Luo Haofeng."

Because I was called by my full name by a stranger, my curiosity did rise a little bit.The moment I stopped and hesitated, the escape path opened by my anger was instantly closed, and I fell back into the wonderful space from which I could not escape.

"I just wanted to ask, how do you know my name?"

"I know everything, because I am the strongest existence in this school." The senior sister spoke incomprehensible words in words that were not difficult to understand.

"Then what's the purpose of you looking for me?" Is it a cult organization or a pyramid scheme? There is a delicate balance to be struck between these two answers.

"My purpose is to get you to join the C Major News Agency."

Look, it really is a cult organization.

"Sorry, I already want to join the student council, and the news agency doesn't seem to have any competitiveness at all."

I tried my best to recall the content of the not-so-thin introduction manual of the C major club.Aside from the introduction to the school-level student union, which takes up half of the book, even in ordinary clubs, the news agency's propaganda is not outstanding.

It's not so much a promotion for recruiting new recruits as it is a promotion for refusing to recruit new recruits.The place reserved for the news agency is a total of two pages and four sides.

In large red letters, the first side read: "No news for us."

On the second side, it was written in red typewriting: "Our company does not participate in the unified recruitment of newcomers."

On the third side it was written in large red letters: "Receipt of this brochure certifies that you are not qualified to join this club."

On the fourth side, it was written in large red characters: "End."

For some unknown reason, among the admission navigation documents that I received uniformly during the report, only mine was missing the club's introduction to this book.Therefore, when I borrowed it from my classmates in the same dormitory, I complained that it seems that I am the only one in the whole school who is eligible to join this club.

However, that was a joke, I hope all the fairy sisters don't take it seriously.

The moment the person in front of me uttered the word "news agency", I understood why the news agency's recruitment promotion was like that.It is said that a brilliant designer is either a genius or a lunatic, and now it seems that this one must be the latter.

The senior sister didn't seem to care about my harsh pointing out the low competitiveness of their clubs, she looked at me with an expression of anger rather than pity: "Sure enough, it's the ordinary reaction of ordinary people who are one in a hundred. It is already beyond the ordinary level. However, what we are looking for is an outstanding ordinary person like you who can represent ordinary people to join the club."

"I'm just an ordinary person, can you let me go?" I almost said this in a pleading tone.

"No." The senior sister refused decisively, as if she knew that I would ask this question, "And don't you think it would be more inappropriate to join the student union as an ordinary person?"

This is true, I have indeed heard some bad rumors about university student unions before, such as power struggles, student politics, wine pools, meat forests, etc...

However, I always feel that it is just like an urban legend that Beijing students can go to a national first-level university with a score of 400.After all, stories like that always start with "I know a friend who said...".

"You are an ordinary person. Through unremitting efforts, you came to this slightly above-average school, but without the help of outsiders, it is impossible for you to enter the completely extraordinary student union of C University."

Senior sister read out my death sentence like a justice judge who sentenced a heinous criminal.

However, the more people say that, the less likely most people will give up.I have already begun to study whether to make the resume that will be used when recruiting new members in the club tomorrow more beautiful.

"It's useless, no matter how hard you try, you won't be able to enter the student union. Although it's cruel, even if you are in the student union, it will be superfluous for you to be an officer." This sentence of the senior sister really made me a little angry. As soon as it was placed on the table, he clapped his hands on the table and made a loud noise, and said to the senior sister:

"I don't know where you got my information, I don't know who you are, and I don't know what your purpose is. But I know that as long as human beings keep working hard, they can always get what they want! "

Senior sister didn't seem to expect such an extreme reaction from me, she was slightly taken aback, then lowered her head and laughed.

"What's so ridiculous!"

The senior sister laughed so badly that she could hardly breathe, and then she looked at me with an incredulous expression: "In this day and age, there are still people who believe in what you sow and what you gain."

"What's wrong with that?"

The senior sister looked at me like an alien, as if to confirm that I really thought so.After being forced back by my determined eyes, the senior sister sighed and said, "Do you understand the memory card of the mobile phone?"

The sudden turn of the subject caught me off guard, but I nodded anyway.

"When you choose a mobile phone memory card, besides the price, what other factors do you consider?"

Capacity, as a memory card, the most important thing is capacity.

"Sure enough, you overlooked a very important point."

The senior continued: "I think the most important factor is the speed of the memory card, that is, the class. If it is just the capacity, it is not very troublesome for me to prepare a few more cards."

I seemed to suddenly understand what she was trying to say.

"Speed ​​is irreplaceable, even if I buy a few more memory cards, it can't be solved at all. For human beings, speed is like talent, and capacity is like effort. If the value that a person can create is determined by It is determined by two factors: hard work and talent, so your life when you desperately enter the student union is as ridiculous as a class 64 card with a capacity of 4g.”

So far, I think this strange negotiation has completely broken down.Because the difference in outlook on life and values ​​between me and the senior in front of me is wider than the Great Rift Valley in Africa, and it would be meaningless to talk about it any longer.If the news agency is based on people like senior sisters as the spiritual core, I think the possibility of me joining is about 0%.

"Are you really not considering joining our club?" Senior sister confirmed for the last time, and I nodded firmly.

The senior sister took out a brochure from her satchel and handed it to me. I looked at the cover and it turned out to be a club introduction.

"Then, please choose someone you are interested in and join when the club recruits new members tomorrow afternoon," said the senior sister, picking up her satchel and walking past me gracefully, no longer sloppy, as if sitting here for one more minute It's like wasting time, the flowing black hair draws beautiful curves under the afterglow of the setting sun.If it weren't for the sound of the barrier being broken and the seemingly invisible voice from the far away senior sister, I really thought that I would become this C University with 1 college students with this person from now on. , Two passers-by who don't know each other.

"If you can do it."