mistakenly compared you to a star

Chu Zichen, who was trapped in the bedroom, fell asleep again not long after.

This time, he drifted with his consciousness all the way, and finally came to the balcony with Chu Chen again.

When he walked to the balcony, he felt his body was very light, and he didn't feel the pain in reality at all.The scenery outside the balcony changed, and it was found that there was a calm and blue lake outside, and the soft and dry clouds above were reflected on the water surface.The whole world is clear and pure.

"Water area can make people feel more relaxed." Chu Chen appeared from nowhere and said to him holding a set of blue and white porcelain tea sets.

Chu Chen was surprised: "Do you know what happened outside?"

Chu Chen shook his head: "No, I can't see it. If you don't want to, I won't be curious about specific things. The only thing I care about is the state of your soul. Zichen, I can feel it. In the midst of a huge collapse."

Chu Zichen felt Chu Chen's sense of space reserved for each other, and smiled after a long absence.He suddenly missed the mother-like embrace last time.

Just as he was thinking this, Chu Chen had already opened his arms and hugged him.

Chu Zichen threw himself into his arms without saying a word, and heaved a long sigh of relief. Gradually, he seemed to have become a light cloud.

After a long time, he asked, "Ah Chen, have you ever been hurt by Yan Ke?"

"There are many conflicts and obstacles between us, but I don't think he hurt me."

Chu Zichen felt sour in his heart, and also had a feeling of humbleness that he didn't want to admit.So he gently pushed Chu Chen away, and after a long silence, he said, "That's right. At least he really loves you."

"No, actually I don't know either."

Chu Chen's eyes drifted into the distance: "Yan Ke thinks he loves me, but I think it's more a kind of sympathy and a sense of indebtedness."

Chu Zichen couldn't bear it any longer: "Are you saying that to comfort me? Yan Ke loves you so much, and he has tried his best on me, just waiting for you to go back..."

When he realized that there was jealousy in his tone, he stopped talking abruptly.

No one knew that he had humbly prayed that even if Yan Ke gave him one tenth of his love for Chu Chen, it would be good.

Chu Chen looked at him with some compassion, and shook his head: "The person Yan Ke loves will always be himself. Selfish and stubborn, he will not change for anyone."

...Yeah, isn't that what it is?Chu Zichen chewed these few words over and over in his heart, and gradually developed a belated understanding.

He should have thought of it earlier.If it wasn't out of deep disappointment, why did Chu Chen so stubbornly reject the outside world.

In addition, there was a little bitterness that he himself did not want to admit: Sure enough, Chu Chen knew Yan Ke better than himself.Is it because of this reason that I can't replace Chu Chen's position in Yan Ke's heart?

...why am I still thinking about this?I must be dazed.Chu Zichen closed his eyes forcefully, and said to Chu Chen with a wry smile, "I wish you could tell me earlier."

Chu Chen didn't say anything, instead he answered the flower-scented wind blowing from the lake.Chu Zichen looked over in surprise, and saw overlapping cherry blossoms blooming on the other side of the lake, like powder snow falling one after another.

Chu Chen picked up the teapot, poured out a cup of fragrant scented tea and handed it to Chu Zichen. There was also a cherry blossom swirling gently in the tea.

"Zichen, I just want you to be happy with me. You don't know how much I like to see you smile."

Chu Zichen raised his head and looked at him quietly.He didn't feel shy when the other party looked at him from such a close distance, probably because this face was the same as his own, as if looking in a mirror, it would only make him feel close and pity him.

Finally he nodded and laughed: "Well. You know what? Before going to bed, I wanted to see you, I held my left palm, and then I really saw you... Only this thing It does make me happy."

Yan Ke has been staying in Chu Zichen's room since he got up, and when he saw him smiling in his dream, his eyes widened.

It would be great if this smile belonged to me.When was the last time Chu Zichen smiled at himself?He couldn't remember anything.

He couldn't help it, and stretched out his finger to touch the other's dimple.

However, as soon as they touched each other, the other party opened his eyes, and he withdrew his hand guiltily: "Zichen, are you awake? Did you dream about something happy just now?"

Chu Zichen rubbed his eyes, and when he saw the face in front of him clearly, he answered coldly like a little hedgehog who quickly hid its soft belly and opened its hard thorns:

"I dreamed about Chu Chen. Did I tell you about him in my dream? Recently, I can see him frequently. We talk about everything."

Yan Ke was at a loss for words.Chu Zichen interpreted this reaction as jealousy towards himself, and felt a twisted satisfaction, so he continued: "You know, now I understand him very well, there is everything in his dream, and he doesn't have to miss you, he wants to It's normal to hide."

"What did he tell you?" Yan Ke frowned, suspecting that Chu Zichen was telling such a lie just to make himself angry.However, Chu Zichen did not rush, and generously recounted the conversation between himself and Chu Chen in detail.

Yan Ke gradually couldn't listen anymore.Unexpectedly, Chu Chen would instill such a point of view in Chu Zichen. Now the two of them are going to stand on the same side, and they are going to betray him together, and he can only watch it happen?

No wonder Chu Zichen looked more distant and indifferent this morning than before.They didn't care about themselves a long time ago, and turned themselves who had been waiting infatuatedly for many years into a joke.

It's nothing more than Chu Chen alone, why is even Chu Zichen easily bewitched!

"Enough!" Yan Ke interrupted Chu Zichen.

"Don't get involved in the misunderstanding between me and Chu Chen. We didn't figure out what happened back then, so what do you know? After so many years, what should have passed has passed, and I have also changed. Doesn't it mean that he doesn't want to understand the present at all? Me? If you really want to clear up the misunderstanding, let him come out and talk to me face to face!"

Seeing that Yan Ke cared so much about Chu Chen's words, Chu Zichen's heart turned cold again: "I don't have the ability to call him out, nor will I deliver a message for you, don't think about it."

Yan Ke was almost exasperated: "So you just want to get revenge on me by saying this?"

Chu Zichen looked at him and suddenly felt very sad.He pities himself and loves a person whose heart is on others.I also pity Yan Ke, who is stuck in the past and cannot extricate himself, so he can only let himself become ugly and narrow.

"Yes. So please recognize the reality, Yan Ke, my only wish now is to leave."

Why?Why do they both just want to leave?Yan Ke's body shook, and he raised his voice involuntarily: "I made a mistake, but I'm trying to make up for you now, aren't I? I promise I will never do anything you hate again! Zichen, when will you Become so indifferent, don't you even give me a chance?"

Yan Ke suddenly remembered something, stood up and pointed to the things in the room: "Look, we have had so many pasts, are they all worthless in your eyes?"

"Yes! It's worthless!" Chu Zichen felt unable to reason with him at all, "What's the past? That's all the past where you reluctantly got along with me in order to get back your Chu Chen! These are all just your scams , It’s just your props! And now you still want to use these things to kidnap my feelings?”

"Yes, I just kidnapped you, but did I succeed? I thought you had a heart! But you didn't!" Yan Ke roared hysterically, and took something out of his pocket, "Are you sure you don't care anymore? We You don't care about all these pasts, do you?"

What Yan Ke held in his hand was the mobile phone he had taken from Chu Zichen earlier.

Yan Ke knew his mobile phone password, directly opened his photo album, held it in front of him and flipped through it excitedly: "Look for yourself, these are all photos you took. These were taken on the plane we went to Singapore. This I made the meal at your house. This is us on your crew's hotel bed... our first time right? And this is your birthday we filmed in a see-through tent. We filmed in Washi... ..."

"I don't want to read it, it's useless! You take it away!" Chu Zichen pushed his hand away forcefully, trying not to look away.Who would know that he really didn't dare to watch it, since he heard Yan Ke's heartfelt voice in the clubhouse that night, he never dared to watch it again, because he knew that he would definitely miss it and be reluctant to part with it.

But on the other hand, he felt disgusted by his unprincipled nostalgia.The two incompatible moods tugged him back and forth, almost driving him crazy.

Yan Ke stared with red eyes, as if he wanted to convey a thousand words to Chu Zichen, but Chu Zichen refused to look at him.Finally, he gave up and lowered his hands, stepping back step by step.

"Chu Zichen, you'd better not take yourself too seriously. Since you don't care anymore, what else do I care about!"

The more he spoke, the more ruthless he was, and when he saw the half-open window, a surge of anger made his body move automatically.He rushed to the window and threw the phone forcefully——!

The phone made a distant shattering sound when it landed, and then it shattered into several petals, which seemed to still have those memories of the past.There was a dull pain in Chu Zichen's heart, and he shouted recklessly:

"If you really cherish it, why did you do those things? I fed the dog with all my heart!"

Yan Ke was at a loss for words for a moment, but became angry in a blink of an eye. He suddenly turned around and started smashing things around him. Chu Zichen's books, collections, luggage... were all thrown on the ground by him.

When the model of the house suddenly came into his sight, he paused for a short time, and also swept it on the ground vigorously.

wow-

Unlike other items, the moment the model landed, the parts splashed and shattered.

Even the glued walls collapsed into colorful fragments, like a shattered dream.

Small tables, chairs, goblets, bathtubs... were scattered all over the floor.Chu Zichen discovered for the first time that his dream was so small, so illusory and fragile.

Yan Ke also seemed to be frightened by the thrilling crackling sound, and his movements stopped for a moment.Looking at the mess, he backed away unconsciously, but stepped on a bedside table inadvertently, and it was immediately smashed to pieces.

Chu Zichen, who had been pale since just now, suddenly burst into tears.

He was shaking all over, and he bit his lip trying not to make a sound, but the tears rolled down his cheeks in big ones.

Something was completely disconnected in his heart.He couldn't speak, his anger disappeared, and even his disappointment was muted. There was only pure sadness in his heart, and he could only pay homage to the quietly passing thing with unstoppable tears.

Yan Ke raised his feet in astonishment, and when he saw the mess on the soles of his feet, he stayed where he was like a child who made a mistake.

Chu Zichen cried.He thought Chu Zichen's tears were exactly what he wanted to see now, it was the proof that the other party still had nostalgia in his heart; but now seeing the other party's heartache, he actually felt that his soul was like that little piece of furniture, Couldn't put it together anymore...

Is this feeling what ordinary people call regret?

The feeling of being at a loss, like high walls erected in all directions around him, made him suffocate.The only option left is to leave quickly.

So he lowered his head, not even daring to look at Chu Zichen's expression, and left the bedroom as if fleeing.

What to do, it seems to have entered a dead end.

Am I really a failure.

No, there must be something else I can do...!

After returning to the living room to calm down for a while, Yan Ke suddenly thought of the call from the nursing home a few days ago, and impulsively dialed it.

--------------------

Oops, Zha Gong is digging his own grave again