哏儿

There was silence on the phone.

"Hello?" Shi Xiangcheng asked, "Are you listening? Why didn't you respond? What an exciting imagination!"

"Compared to things like holding a special show..." Xie Shuangchen gritted his teeth, but still restrained his impulse and said calmly, "Sister, can you let me sleep first? Can I share the joy tomorrow?"

"No." Shi Xiangcheng said, "I'm afraid I will forget it tomorrow."

Xie Shuangchen roared in his heart, elder sister, have you opened your eyes?Come early or late, why not come at this time!I'm going to be scared to death by you!What if your happy life is affected in the future? !

Do you know what it means to be hard enough to be happy?

"that……"

"No, what are you doing now?" Shi Xiangcheng interrupted him.

"I'm going to sleep." Xie Shuangchen still replied calmly, but his face was full of tears.Ye Ling was lying on the bed laughing uncontrollably, but she couldn't make a sound, and she couldn't bear it.

"But I didn't hear sleepiness from your voice." Shi Xiangcheng said, "I feel quite refreshed."

Xie Shuangchen turned on the power amplifier, and when Shi Xiangcheng said the word "spirit", Ye Ling couldn't do it anymore. He felt that if he continued to hold back, he might suffocate.No matter how upset Xie Shuangchen was, he couldn't tell a girl about his private affairs in the room. Shi Xiangcheng asked him what he was doing, but he couldn't answer that I'm doing something indescribable. Don't bother me, right?

Although in fact Shi Xiangcheng might not mind at all, he might even provide Xie Shuangchen with some unpopular interesting knowledge.

Xie Shuangchen was aggrieved, very aggrieved, Ye Ling found that collapsed appearance surprisingly cute.

Some strange thoughts may even arise in my heart.

He slowly moved in front of Xie Shuangchen to tease Xie Shuangchen, Xie Shuangchen was touched unexpectedly, and cried out in surprise.

"Are you going to die, Xie Shuangchen?" Shi Xiangcheng asked, "What's the matter with you, I will arrange to go to school every Monday from next week, starting with Central Finance and Economics, there are many girls in their school..."

Xie Shuangchen covered his mouth and panted heavily.

"Then there are the National People's Congress, Jiaotong University, and Guangyuan. It's exactly one month, and the students can finish it before the summer vacation. Oh, by the way, the Guangyuan is not on Xueyuan Road, don't forget it. Hey... hello? Talk! People! Where did the dead go!"

There was a "ding" in Shi Xiangcheng's ears, and the voice actually hung up!She tore off the mask and scolded: "Xie Shuangchen, you were sleepy in your last life! I haven't finished talking yet, you gave me a second sleep! Just wait!"

The world is divided into the world you imagined and the real world. Shi Xiangcheng imagined it, and Xie Shuangchen probably fell asleep listening to it.It's not that she's so innocent that she doesn't know about those yellow wastes, it's just that she doesn't bother to think about it anymore.

However, the real world is full of feasting and feasting, men and women, under colored light, eyes full of yellow?

Fortunately, the Yongping Club does not work during the day.

Before the show started in the evening, the actors all went backstage. Xie Shuangchen looked unhappy and stared at Shi Xiangcheng as if the other party owed him 800 million.

"Can you stop calling me at night?" Xie Shuangchen said, "I don't want to see you during non-working hours! No, I don't want to hear your voice either!"

Shi Xiangcheng said slowly while sipping tea: "But young people must show their fighting spirit day and night at the stage of entrepreneurship! How dare I relax when my ambition is not paid?"

"All right." Xie Shuangchen said helplessly, "The military medals are all yours."

"I won't chat with you guys anymore." Shi Xiangcheng stood up, "I went to the front to pick up the guests, the military medal, I can't do without the cleaning girl!" She said the last four words very emphatically, deliberately mocking Xie Shuangchen.

Xie Shuangchen will also do the trick of "don't listen or listen to bastards chanting scriptures".

Cai Xunshang and Lu Xunhan came and greeted everyone. Ye Ling waved his hand, then handed Lu Xunhan a small box, and said, "I almost forgot, today is your birthday."

Lu Xunhan was stunned for a moment, but he didn't realize it. He looked down and saw that it was Long Jiaosan.

"Hey, is it your birthday?" Xie Shuangchen yelled, and everyone ran over.Xie Shuangchen wandered around the backstage and said, "I don't have any preparations, or else we're breaking up and everyone goes to dinner? I'll treat you."

"Farewell." Lu Xunhan said, "It's not a big deal. I don't even remember Mr. Ye. The show is over late, so let's go home and rest."

"Then you can figure it out yourself, I can do it." Xie Shuangchen leaned over and touched Lu Xunhan. Lu Xunhan stepped back vigilantly and asked, "What are you doing?"

"I feel happy touching you!" Xie Shuangchen not only petted himself, but also called everyone to pet him, "Lucky touch the koi, bless everyone get rich! Rich man! Lao Cai! You should pet it the most!"

Cai Xunshang shouted in dissatisfaction: "I'm homophobic!" After he finished speaking, he drank his saliva and was scalded by hot water.

"Reporter of the present world." Xie Shuangchen said.

Cai Xunshang and Lu Xunhan were the first actors to come to Yongping Club. They continued to act with Xie Shuangchen, and gradually gained some audiences.

Probably good-looking, he always has a say in the circle of people who talk about cross talk.

Lu Xunhan's luck is good or bad, but he can't hold back his mourning, not to mention his handsome appearance, which really attracts the audience.In contrast, Cai Xunshang, the overturned king, does not mean that his professional level is not good, but that he is really memorized to the extreme, and he can play with a fan. Can he rely on the quality of his fans? ?

But for any show that uses props, there is almost no time when it does not overturn. For example, today's performance of "Spitting out a Lotus" is a hurdle.

Some viewers knew about Lu Xunhan's birthday and sent him a birthday gift. He was surprised and thanked him quickly.In the Wing Ping Club, Xie Shuangchen was too dazzling, and it was not easy to separate the faint candlelight from his light.Xie Shuangchen was also very worried about this matter, he hoped that every actor in the agency could be on his own, instead of selling tickets by himself.

A person's abilities are always limited.

Xie Shuangchen bumped up to take the gifts for Lu Xunhan and got off the stage. There were quite a few things, and he felt the joy of an old farmer's harvest.

"Spitting out a lotus flower" is still being performed on the stage.

Xie Shuangchen will never act in this show. One is because he feels bored and he can't laugh when he listens to it, so no matter how he plays it, he can't make any laughs.The second one is that an actor who is amused has to beat his head with a fan to imitate beating a gong, and it has to be loud.Even if he had the skills to beat it without pain, Xie Shuangchen was unwilling to play Ye Ling like this.

Lu Xunhan likes acting in this show very much.

Maybe it's from Koi's mockery of all aspects of Africa.

"Please shake the world!" Lu Xunhan pinched his fingers to play tricks.

Cai Xunshang knocked on his head with a fan: "Kang Kuang!"

"Second please ghosts and spirits!"

"Bang bang!"

"Three invites Mao Laodao!"

"Bang bang!"

"Fourth invite Grandpa Jiang!"

"Bang bang!"

"Five invitations to Zhu Bajie!"

"Bang bang!"

"Six please Monkey King!"

"Bang bang!"

"Seven invitations to Monk Sha!"

"Bang bang!"

"Eight please be Tang Seng!"

"Bang bang!"

"Nine, please come to Sol!"

"Bang bang!"

"Ten please be Loki!"

Cai Xunshang pushed Lu Xunhan: "Do you invite foreign gods too?"

Lu Xunhan said bitterly: "Aren't foreign gods gods? Hurry up, don't mess around, and be sincere. If you interrupt me, I'll have to invite you from the beginning... It seems that Zeus hasn't invited yet."

"Can you do it? Why didn't I see the reaction?"

"Oh, foreign gods are slow to come here, because of jet lag, my day is your night." Lu Xunhan said, "What if someone saves the earth in outer space? I have to ask someone to come here on a special mission, and there is a visa. Security checks and the like are very troublesome."

"Hurry up!" Cai Xunshang wanted to knock Lu Xunhan with his fan.

Lu Xunhan continued to play tricks and said, "Go on... then Iron Man! Captain America again! Mickey Mouse again! Niu Colu Zhen Huan again! Song Hana again! Lucian again! Jobs again! Please..."

The point of this show is that the funny people say that they will invite the gods to pick up the fairy, and the water that comes out after drinking is a blooming lotus. In order to show grandeur during the process of picking up the fairy, someone needs to beat the gong.There is no gong on the field, so you can only use your own head instead.So every time you invite a god, you have to "bang bang" knock your head twice.

Lu Xunhan spoke faster and faster, and Cai Xunshang naturally knocked faster and faster. He was a little proud of himself. He was very lucky that the fan was not broken today.

"Look up! The gods have come—"

"Kuang, kuang, kuang..." Cai Xunshang beat one after another, more frequently, and the fan was not broken.

He felt that this performance might be a perfect performance for himself without loss, and at the moment when he was feeling emotional, Lu Xunhan took a sip of water and started to get lucky, and Cai Xunshang quickly answered the words: "Master! You are so hot!"

Lu Xunhan lifted it up in one breath, and his luck became deeper, as if he had swallowed a big mouthful and was about to spit.

In traditional passages, teasing is just to make the audience laugh. However, after the founding of the People’s Republic of China, especially after the new cross talk became popular, this kind of meaningless paragraph has been adapted to become teasing to swallow water, Both parties bow to end.

But if you look at Xie Shuangchen who spouts lotus flowers for ten thousand years, it's boring to spray it or not.

Originally, Lu Xunhan was going to swallow it, but Cai Xunshang answered "Fuck you", and the task was completed.

However, there is an accident in everything, and a male audience suddenly shouted: "Happy birthday, Lao Han, I want to give birth to you!"

Lu Xunhan was startled, and sprayed all the water on Cai Xunshang's face.

The audience burst into laughter.

"Oh my god!" Xie Shuangchen laughed in the background, "It's still Lao Cai's misery hahahahahaha! I suddenly got this joke hahahaha!"

Ye Ling couldn't help but want to touch her forehead.

Cai Xunshang had been completely petrified on the stage, and Lu Xunhan's mouth contained a lot of water, which made Cai Xunshang drenched after spraying it.It never occurred to him that there was still a hurdle waiting for him here.

No wonder the fan is not broken, because the energy in the world is conserved!

Cai Xun wiped his face with a cloth on the commercial table. Although this was an unexpected episode, he broke the original ending when he paused, and he didn't follow the traditional way of cross talk to chase the teaser off stage.Their own rhythm is out of order so that the audience can't feel that there is something inappropriate. Cai Xunshang can only bite the bullet and continue: "Where is the lotus?"

"What lotus?" Lu Xunhan asked.

"You said that you can spit out lotus flowers, and you can spit out a water lotus flower." Cai Xunshang said, "Now spray me with water, what about lotus flowers?"

Lu Xunhan thought for a while, then patted Cai Xunshang on the shoulder and said, "Here it is!"

"Why are you shooting me?"

"Water lotus asks for lotus to accompany you, and you are the white lotus in full bloom." Lu Xunhan said, "The English name is 'Bichi'. My ah, this is the law of according to the demon. It is as urgent as a law, and the lotus will appear soon! "

"Let me go to you!" Cai Xunshang kicked Lu Xunhan, and the two stepped back and bowed in tacit understanding, adding a little tail, and this was considered a successful resignation.

Although it can't be said to be absolutely perfect, it is remarkable to be able to perform like this in a hurry.

"Today must be the day of my ultimate invincible funeral!" Cai Xunshang began to feel aggrieved as soon as he stepped off the stage, "I really shouldn't be on stage today, my God, the time is coming!"

"Are you okay?" Lu Xunhan was worried again, very sad, "I really didn't want to spray you, I didn't mean it? It's just that someone shouted inexplicably under the stage, hey, wipe it off quickly? Don't catch a cold gone."

Everyone in the backstage was still joking about the koi's strength to mock the non-chief. Xie Shuangchen and Ye Ling had already gone to the stage.

This is how they live every day, sleeping during the day and performing on stage until late at night.The nightlife in Beijing may not be as gorgeous as that in Shanghai and Guangzhou, but it has its own charm.Whether it's a cold winter night or a summer with cicadas chirping, every night there is a place where people can laugh and forget the troubles of life for a while.

Are you happy chasing stars?Burn infinite love and sincerity to look up to an unattainable dream;

Are you happy counting money?Institutions do everything they can to fight for wealth and honor in the arena between people;

Are you happy cursing?It's just a game and a dream after venting the excitement to the fullest.

What is true happiness, no one has the right answer, and everyone's needs are different.

For most people, life is an unsolvable problem, a terminal illness that takes a lifetime.Life is short, and nine out of ten times it doesn't go your way, and the one or two blessings that remain don't actually save life, but at least it's an aspirin.

This is the most basic need.

And the laughter brought by cross talk is a thin layer of sugar coating, so that people will not face those swords and fires so nakedly and directly.

The first stop of Xie Shuangchen's university tour tour was Central University of Finance and Economics. Although Shi Xiangcheng had done a lot of homework for Xie Shuangchen and explained to him what kind of school it was, Xie Shuangchen remembered two things.

There are many girls, and it is very far away because it is near the Shabei Airlines campus.

"Why are these schools in the suburbs?" Xie Shuangchen complained, "It's too far away!"

"It doesn't matter if one or two energetic young people, but a group of energetic young people is a factor of social instability." Shi Xiangcheng said, "If they are not locked up in the suburbs to go to school, should they be released to take over the urban areas? The life of adults The space is already very small!"

Xie Shuangchen said, "You are right."

Ye Ling asked: "What do you want to say this time?"

"Since there are many girls, let's talk about a more elegant literary show..." Xie Shuangchen said.

"I think you're thinking a little too much." Shi Xiangcheng said, "It's all girls who are having fun now."

"I don't care about the audience." Xie Shuangchen said, "I have the morals of an artist, okay?"

"All right, all right." Shi Xiangcheng waved his hand, "Do whatever you like."

Ye Ling said: "I'm asking what the topic of your speech is. Can't every school say the same thing?"

"I want to talk about my original intention of starting the Wing Ping Society." Xie Shuangchen said.

"Don't forget your original intention and keep your mission in mind?" Shi Xiangcheng asked.

"No." Xie Shuangchen said, "It's all forced by life. If my family has a mine, why should I still talk about cross talk?"

Shi Xiangcheng said: "Do you think that having a mine at home is very happy? Then maybe there will be some dissatisfaction with life."

Ye Ling glanced at Shi Xiangcheng.

The three of them worked in the background for a while, Yao Sheng called Xie Shuangchen, and when he saw someone in the theater, he also ran over.

"Hey. What brought you here?" Xie Shuangchen asked Yao Sheng, "Have you eaten?"

"Eat, I'm just passing by." Yao Sheng said, "I'm assessing actors in the morning."

Ye Ling asked: "How is it?"

"It's going well. Basically, the teams of Peking Opera and Pingju can be settled." Yao Sheng said, "Your theater, give it to me on Monday, please?"

"Fifty thousand a day." Xie Shuangchen stretched out his hand.

"Fart!" Yao Sheng said, "At most, I will pay you for lost work by the day."

Xie Shuangchen said: "Lost wages? What are you going to do? Let me tell you that my place is..."

"It's serious, otherwise why would I come here and tell you in person?" Yao Sheng said, "I want to install LEDs on your stage, and you won't be able to start work for a few days. But it doesn't matter, I will pay you at the normal full price you."

"You sing operas, why are you still making marquees?" Xie Shuangchen said loudly, "This is the stage where I eat, this is my life! Are you going to tear it down for me? I won't let you do whatever you want!"

Yao Sheng said, "Then what do you say?"

Xie Shuangchen put on an air and said, "You have to count the money for the extra seat!"

Ye Ling held his forehead, not knowing where Xie Shuangchen came from.