Looking forward to the stars

Jin Haohui watched Zhan Chen vomit blood, saw him collapse in front of him and convulsed in pain, he was terrified, he finally recalled what he had done, he knelt down with a plop, as if he was making atonement, begging for forgiveness, or self-punishment, Ask for forgiveness.

"Zhanchen! Zhanchen!"

He shook Zhan Chen's body, and Zhan Chen's bones were pulled out, and his body swayed with his shaking.

"I'll take you to the hospital, I'll take you to the hospital, hold on for a while, Zhanchen!"

When the body was picked up, blood was still flowing from the mouth, and Zhan Chen finally passed out.

Soon, Zhanchen was sent to the operating room with severe soft tissue injuries, damage to the liver and spleen, and massive bleeding in the abdomen.

The operation was lengthy, and it was already the morning of the second day when Zhan Chen pushed into the ward.

"...In addition, the patient is very weak and tends to be deaf in his left ear. During this time, please let him rest as much as possible."

The doctor left this sentence earnestly. There were only the two of them left in the ward. Jin Haohui looked at Zhan Chen's pale face. If it wasn't for his gentle breathing that made the snow-white bedding undulate, this person would be dead and lifeless. Jin Haohui Very sad, why is he so stubborn, why is he as stubborn as him, knowing that he can’t change his mind, but insisting that he follow his own will, he hugs him through the quilt, sticks to his ear and says:

"Why are you so stupid?"

After a long time, an angry voice replied.

"Because I want to."

Jin Haohui looked at him with tears streaming down his face, Zhan Chen woke up, his eyes were still so clear and bright, like a clean mirror, forgiving the other party's filth.

Jin Haohui felt stinging, fell in love with him because of these eyes, fell in love with him because of this person, and tortured him because of this love.

He looked at him quietly, the anesthetic hadn't passed yet, Zhan Chen closed his eyes again and fell into a drowsy sleep.

Feng Fan received the news that Zhan Chen was found and sent to the hospital, so he rushed here at full speed.He hadn't closed his eyes for four days and nights, and the dark circles under his eyes were deeper and darker than Zhan Chen's before, his beard was stubble, and his hair was unkempt.

He was smiling wryly and painfully. This is simply retribution, a cycle of karma. He designed his disappearance to make Zhan Chen miserable. After a few days, Zhan Chen's disappearance made his life worse than death. If Zhan Chen was his opponent, he would have no way to win, because the moment he took his heart away, he would have lost. Until now, he has only lost even more. Thorough and more perfect.

Zhan Chen was awakened by the pain. Once the anesthetic was over, the pain came like a mountain. Jin Haohui hurried in, put down the warm water bottle in his hand, pulled off the infusion needle on his arm, and wanted to hug him up.

"Haohui, where are you taking me, my lower abdomen hurts."

"Um……"

Zhan Chen groaned in pain, but Jin Haohui ignored him and broke his hand holding the bed sheet away.

"He's here, I can't let him take you away!"

Jin Haohui was expressionless and hard-hearted, regardless of Zhan Chen's wound, he forced him out of the ward.

"Hey, sir, you can't take the sick!"

A nurse came to stop him along the way, Jin Haohui ignored the crowd, took Zhan Chen up the stairs before the security guards came up, quickly got into the car, fastened his seat belt, and drove away.

"That's the car, stop him quickly, he took the patient away."

The nurse upstairs screamed, and the security guards below rushed out to intercept them. No one dared to get close for fear of being bumped into.

Zhanchen leaned weakly on the chair, held his lower abdomen with his hand to adjust his breathing, looked at Jin Haohui's side face, childish like a child, but now only paranoid, he has too strong obsession with himself, too strong to bear, like a A paranoid who lost himself, like a devil, no one knew that he was under house arrest by Jin Haohui, because they were such strong friends, no one doubted him, even Feng Fan would not think of it in a short time.

When Feng Fan arrived, he saw a commotion in the hospital, arrested a person for questioning, and said that someone forcibly took away a patient.

"Which way are you going?"

Feng Fan glared, the nurse was stunned, screamed and pointed in one direction, Feng Fan followed two steps and looked over, in the mirror, Zhan Chen was wearing a hospital gown and leaning on the side seat, gradually turning into a small dot.

He quickly got back into the car and restarted, chasing in that direction.

Soon, Jin Haohui found that someone was chasing him, and the wrong car was passing by, as fast as an arrow.From the mirror, Zhanchen saw a car chasing him, a black Porsche.

It was Feng Fan, he was the one who found it.

He stretched out a hand to grab Jin Haohui's arm.

"Haohui, let me get out of the car!"

Jin Haohui glanced at him from the side, it was dark and dull, Zhan Chen saw the despair in his eyes, the pain and deep sorrow, without any waves, calm as a dead lake, for a moment, a similar feeling came back, just like the feeling he had felt back then. Yu Shao's pain in peace, now Haohui's despair in pain.

He leaned back in the soft chair and recalled Feng Fan's face, as if it was right in front of him, he could touch it with his hand, and smiled vaguely, every time he smiled at this time, it was full of determination and sadness, which made people guess Knowing what he would do, he suddenly hated him a little, hated himself, maybe after death, everyone can be relieved.

Hands slowly groped for the safety buckle and gently pinched it open.

"Haohui!"

This time he shouted very softly, Jin Haohui's shoulders froze for a moment, still staring at the front, without warning, Zhan Chen suddenly pressed the door handle, and the cold wind came in.

Feng Fan's car was very close behind, and was almost able to overtake them in front of them to intercept him. However, the front door suddenly opened, and Zhan Chen leaned out half of his body. He saw his clothes blown up by the wind, He smiled at him, at that moment, his heart stopped, and time seemed to freeze.

"do not want!"

He blurted out, his throat was choked and suffocated, it was deeply engraved in his heart all his life.Fortunately, Zhanchen was pulled in soon, his heart was jumping with fear, and cold sweat broke out on his fingertips.

"Zhanchen!"

As expected, Jin Haohui had practiced karate, and the moment he felt the wind, he was pulled back and held tightly in his arms. The car lost its balance and went on a rampage. Jin Haohui held the steering wheel with one hand, and the car hit a big tree and stopped.

"Zhanchen, Zhanchen, how are you?"

Jin Haohui was in a state of anxiety, Zhan Chen was motionless in his arms, the wound was split open, and the pain was so weak that the hospital gown was soaked by the dark red blood, Zhan Chen pressed the pain tightly with one hand, sweating like rain, Jin Haohui pinched his chin , bloodshot eyes.

"You would rather die than come with me."

"I said... I want to go back to his... side."

Jin Haohui looked at him quietly for a long time, knowing that there was no way to recover, he put his chin on his forehead and cried bitterly, hugging him tightly.

"I can't do anything with you, I can't do anything with you, Zhanchen, how can you be so cruel, I don't want you to have an accident, I'm afraid you just fell out, I almost killed you, what should I do, what should I do manage?"

Feng Fan slammed on the brakes and rushed over. Zhan Chen saw him in the mirror and motioned him not to come any closer.

He stopped, and the previous feeling of Zhanchen's vague changes came back. Zhanchen had changed, as if he had transformed from immature to a man. The boy who had begged to take him away, like a butterfly breaking out of a cocoon, was about to fly.

Feng Fan leaned against the car and waited for him, just like when he was picked up from the newspaper office for the first time.

"This is my choice, I don't blame you, it's just that I didn't expect you..."

"like you."

Jin Haohui cut off his words.

"Maybe I discovered it a long time ago, but I dare not think about it here. I am afraid that I will misunderstand if I don't grasp the feeling correctly."

"If I told you earlier, would you love me?"

Zhanchen closed his eyes and remained silent, biting his lips white.

"do not know!"

He didn't say no, whether he would fall in love with him, Jin Haohui tightened his arms.

"But you sure won't now, because you fell in love with him?"

"Ok!"

Jin Haohui laughed abruptly, blaming Zhanchen.

"So honest, why don't you just lie to me?"

"I can't lie to you."

Jin Haohui froze, tears fell on Zhan Chen's face, with deep guilt in the hot temperature.

"I beat you with my hands and hurt you to the hospital. Don't you hate me?"

Zhan Chen slightly raised the corner of his mouth, and answered honestly:

"Hate, I was beaten half to death by my best friend, how can I not hate."

Jin Haohui trembled.

"But I didn't hate it later. I thought, you didn't want to do this, and you used this method as a last resort. Who told you that you are more one-way than me, and you will only go one way to the end."

Zhan Chen made a joke, but Jin Haohui blamed himself even more.

"You trust me that much."

"Well, otherwise I just fell off and was run over by traffic."

"You never thought that if I didn't react fast enough, if I didn't hold back, you would really die"

Jin Haohui said excitedly, Zhan Chen looked into his eyes seriously,

"You won't let me die"

Tears rushed out, Jin Haohui was sobbing and out of breath, and gave his life's trust. In this world, how many people can put their lives in other people's hands, Jin Haohui didn't get his love, this is enough.

"Did you do this on purpose? You knew that I would save you, so you did it so dangerously and asked me to stop."

Zhan Chen smiled but said nothing, Jin Haohui looked down at him, the corners of Zhan Chen's mouth slightly curved, he smiled helplessly, kissed Zhan Chen's forehead lightly,

"Go ahead, he must be waiting impatiently"

Zhan Chen looked in the mirror, Feng Fan walked around restlessly, looked here from time to time, and then looked at the time on his wrist, he looked at the time as if it hadn't moved, he froze for a while, Zhan Chen felt strangely comfortable watching it.

"Then I will pass"

Jin Haohui opened the car door for him, and Zhan Chen slowly moved down. He watched Zhan Chen hold his belly firmly, and staggered over. Feng Fan rushed over to catch him. They hugged for a moment, Zhan Chen seemed to faint from pain, Feng Fan Fan nervously carried him into the car, and the black Porsche disappeared into the traffic.

Jin Haohui cried bitterly on the steering wheel, Zhanchen forgave him, that simple child, he was right, no matter what he did Zhanchen would forgive him, but he was wrong again, self-blame and guilt would accompany him for the rest of his life. He cannot forgive himself.