side edge

Ji Liao's eyes trembled, and his breathing became a little disordered unconsciously—he recalled what Yan Cun said earlier that his biological parents died in a fire.

With a thought in his mind, he stretched out his hand to gently embrace the other person in his arms, and walked along his back as if to comfort him. After a long time, he said softly, "Don't be afraid."

The man in his arms didn't know where he dreamed, his brows were frowned, as if he was suppressing himself forcibly so that he wouldn't make a sound.

Ji Liao groped and moved his hand up a little bit, bringing the other person's head into his arms, as if thinking of something, he bit his hot ear tip lightly in displeasure.

"Um……"

Captain Yan unconsciously snorted, the tip of his nose raised slightly, and obediently leaned on Ji Liao's arms without moving.

So Ji Liao touched the soft hair of the other party with his fingertips, deliberately leaned close to Yan Cun's ear, and said softly, "What are you doing?"

He pressed the back of his slightly cooler hand to the other's cheek, blinked, and babbled a lot: "What the hell...why do you do this? Why are you suppressing yourself, Yan Cun? Why are you sleeping?" Do you still have to be so tense? Lose control for a while—"

A white light flashed outside the window, he raised his hand and quickly covered the ears of the person in his arms, and only let go after the thunder.

"...don't be afraid," Ji Liao softly comforted him when he saw the other person trembling inadvertently, "don't be afraid, there is nothing to be afraid of thunder...um... am I here?"

He leaned close to Yan Cun's ear as if he had to wake him up, and then he continued: "Well... Isn't it good to lose control for a while? It's okay to be a little presumptuous. Whatever you want to say is open Open your mouth and say, I want to cry and lend you a shoulder, you can do whatever you want, and live a little more presumptuously, okay?"

He stared straight at Yan Cun's reddened lips due to the low-grade fever for a while, took a breath, and finally just raised his hand and pinched the person's cheek, rubbed his thumb lightly at the corner of the other's mouth, and asked, "Is it okay?"

The breathing of the person in his arms inadvertently eased up.

He stretched out his hand and gently grabbed Yan Cun's neck and pinched it for a while. Feeling that something was wrong with him, he moved back a little and asked, "Are you awake?"

"..." The man in his arms didn't respond after being pinched for a long time, but now he felt that Ji Liao's skin was cool and comfortable, and unconsciously wrapped himself around him a little tighter, rubbing his cheek against his cheek like a spoiled child. , as if talking in a dream, "You are so cold..."

Ji Liao didn't dare to move, adjusted his breathing rate, stared at him for a while, and reminded him in a hoarse voice: "It's cold? It should be hot if you rub it again."

"Zzzz..."

"Let go of me," he struggled slightly, "I'll post a fever-reducing sticker for you."

"Zzzzzz..." Captain Yan ignored him.

Ji Liao sighed helplessly, and pressed his forehead against his, felt his body temperature, and patted his back: "Did you hear what I said? Don't pretend to be asleep, just reply when you hear it."

"..." Yan Cun narrowed his eyes and looked at him dimly. In fact, he was awakened by people pinching his face back and forth and talking, "Well... I heard the last sentence without beginning or end. Yes, what are you going back..."

"Which sentence?" Ji Liao raised his eyebrows, coughed lightly and prepared to resume, "I said..."

"Stop, stop - okay!" He hurriedly interrupted Ji Liao, always feeling sober. Listening to this made people feel hot, and moved a little away from people, "Well... I have to give me some time to organize it Words..."

Ji Liao stared at him for a while, answered "Oh" for a long time, got up and turned on the night light a little bit, said "you set it up first" and got out of bed.

He dripped a drop on Captain Yan's forehead with an electronic thermometer, and then went downstairs.

But 5 minutes later, he returned to the room with a cup of cold medicine, and said condescendingly: "Drink it."

Yan Cun didn't do anything at the moment, mainly because his nose was a bit uncomfortable, and he had to go to work at eight o'clock tomorrow morning, so he obediently took the cup and gulped it down, almost choking.

"Hmm..." He returned the cup to Ji Liao, raised his eyes to meet the other's gaze, hesitated for a while, "I..."

"Are you going to sleep?" Ji Liao interrupted him, put the cup aside, raised his finger and pointed to the wall clock on the wall, "It's only 04:30, I can still sleep for a while."

"..." Yan Cunwen blinked his eyes, understood the other party's intention, but still made up his mind and said, "I won't sleep anymore, you should turn off the lights first."

Ji Liao replied "OK", turned off the lights as promised, lifted the quilt to go to bed and lay down.

Now that they couldn't see their faces, both of them had a little less psychological burden, each moved closer to each other, and covered a quilt to 'maximize utilization'.

After the sound of breathing intertwined smoothly, Yan Cun cleared his throat, and then he said solemnly: "Actually, I don't remember much about my childhood, but some fragments flashed in my mind from time to time. I've been afraid of this since I can remember." ...um...afraid of thunder and rain, and also afraid of hearing loud noises."

After adapting to the darkness for a while, he blinked, turned inside out, and continued: "I remember... when I was a child, every time there was thunder and rain, my reaction seemed to be a little exaggerated, and then my mother would also shake every time. Hold me tight and tell me 'don't be afraid', uh... just like you just did."

Ji Liao was silent for a while, then asked, "Did I tremble?"

Yan Cun couldn't help laughing 'puchi', he relaxed and said with a smile: "No, you didn't shake."

He coughed lightly and asked, "Well... Last time I told you, my parents died in a fire when I was five years old, and I happened to be in the nursery at that time—remember?"

Ji Liao let out a "hmm".

"Well... I was waiting for someone to pick me up at the gate of the nursery." His voice was a little hoarse, and he paused for about ten seconds before finishing in one breath. I stood alone at the door and waited, and waited, and waited, but no one came. I panicked, and I told the nursery teacher that I wanted to go home, and I kept talking to them, talking a lot...but no one paid any attention to me."

Ji Liao listened in silence, unable to think of the 'autism' he mentioned earlier.

"I told them that I wanted to borrow an umbrella and go to my parents, but no one paid any attention to me," he unconsciously stepped forward, and whispered, "...I guess I was a little flustered at the time, and I had a gut feeling about what would happen The bad thing... um... At that time, I seemed to know that my intuition was a little scary, and I didn't know what to do, so I rushed out in the rain, and kept going in the direction of home in my memory..."

He heard the sound of cloth rubbing in front of him, he stopped talking, and felt that a hand seemed to be on his forehead, then he reached down and grabbed his cold fingertips, and rubbed them gently a few times.

"Well," he heard Ji Liao say softly, "Go ahead."

Although it felt like something was wrong, he was completely immersed in the memory, and he didn't pay attention to these things for a while.

"Well... I mean, relying on my memory, I actually ran in whichever way I caught. Now that I think about it, I'm so lucky that I didn't get lost..." He said, "But I really found the right direction at the time, and when I returned When I went near the villa area where the home was located, I found the home at that time, and saw the fire and thick smoke blocked in the house under the torrential rain."

Ji Liao was startled when he heard that.

"I'm not tall enough, and I can't see what's going on inside if I get closer, so I found something to put under my feet," Yan Cun said with a steady breath and a calm tone, "I didn't seem to be afraid of being hot at the time, so I directly I stretched out my hand and leaned on the window to look inside—I saw my father who was almost burned to the ground as a 'charcoal man', and my mother who was rolling, struggling and screaming in the fire. It's over."

Ji Liao used some force unconsciously with his fingertips, his breathing stopped, and his eyes became inexplicably sore.

"Ah..." Yan Cun quickly came to his senses, chuckled reassuringly, and said, "Don't worry, I'm really not restraining anything this time."

"The first step in desensitization is to face up to the pain and scars I have experienced in the past... Well... I have worked hard for more than 20 years, I think... I have probably succeeded in desensitization, and there is no problem anymore, so don't worry about it. "

As if to prove that he was fine, he grabbed Ji Liao's trembling fingertips with a little force, and intertwined their fingers together.

"..." Ji Liao uttered a syllable with some difficulty, "You..."

Why did he have to remember these painful details—Ji Liao didn't ask.

Perhaps because of other reasons, Yan Cun overcame the thunderstorm that he was most afraid of when he was unable to ask others for help and no one took care of him. It was only because of those "bad premonitions" in his heart that he ran back in the rain regardless of the consequences. Just want to find mom and dad.

He didn't find it, and he can't find it again, but he still has to overcome these shadow obstacles, forcefully use desensitization therapy, and force himself to face these painful memories.

It took Ji Liao a long time to make a sound.

"and then?"

He had some urge to embrace the person in front of him, thinking crazily, but the meaning seemed to be more than just comfort.

And Captain Yan's skill of "watching words and expressions" seemed to be developed in an instant, and he realized that the other party's emotions were affected by him, so he decisively stepped forward to hug him, patted Ji Liao on the back, and quickly let go and retreated: "Um... I Come to think of it... I can't remember clearly."

He praised himself in his heart: Very good, the scale is just right.

"Hmm... I don't remember much about what happened afterwards, only bits and pieces flashed through my mind... I seemed to wake up lying on the bed in the nursery, unable to speak, and my hands were There is no blister from the scalding in front of the window, and it still has a fever."

"At that time, I insisted on getting out of bed and ran to the door to wait for my parents as usual. After waiting for one day, two days, three days, I was carried back to the yard, and I ran to the door to wait again while no one was paying attention," His voice was a little more relaxed, "I didn't wait for my parents, but I waited for Fang Yushan. He took me away from there and walked along the road, bringing me back to my current home."