Absurd Comedy ABO

[9 month 20 day]

I obediently returned to China less than a week after that meeting. This was the first time I returned to China after going abroad to repeat my undergraduate studies, and I might not have the opportunity to go out again.It was only when I came back that I realized that I didn't even have a place to stay.

The house in my family has been sold, and I have no money left.Only then did I remember to take a look at the compensation Lin Shaoqiong gave me. I was busy feeling sad at the time, so I only looked at the outline and left an impression in my heart.

Looking at it now, it's a good thing that it's time to go on, there is actually a house inside, the location is good, at least it's a place to go, it won't be too miserable.

But I have to think about what to do next. The dream is finally over, and it's time for me to return to reality.but what can i do

To tell you the truth, I don't really like medical jobs.And even if I continue to do it, it will only bring back my tragic memories, and I still want to hide away before I fully recover.

But what else can I do if I don't do healthcare.Do you want to study the previous major again? After going around in a circle, you finally returned to the original point, wasting a few years in vain.

Forget it later, I just want to sleep right now.

[11 month 5 day]

I finally got in the mood today and checked all the things I received.I think I should have almost recovered, at least I still have the mood to think that Lin Shaoqiong is really good to me.

Just relying on the things he gave me, I actually don't have to worry about what to do next.Even if you do nothing, you can still go on with your life.

In fact, I also want to just forget it like this, find a city I like to live in, and change places when I have enough fun and lose interest.

In fact, I did this, except for the first few days, in order to recover, I lived in the house given by Lin Shaoqiong for a while.It didn't take long for me to go back to my hometown.

I thought that the familiar environment would allow me to recover, but it turns out that it is easier to think wildly when you are idle and have nothing to do.Nothing during the day, but at night, I would think of Lin Shaoqiong and all the things we got along with, and in the end it all converged into one question - why did he treat me like that.

Why do you still show love to me if you don't love me, and why do you abandon me after I believe it.After all, he is so rich, so even if he doesn't trust me, show me this contract at the beginning. Isn't these rewards with clearly marked prices more reliable than feelings.

But I also understand in my heart that there is no reason at all, and many things are out of order.Maybe he was just interested in it on a whim, and then quickly lost interest, just like keeping a pet, which comes and goes as soon as it is invited.

Alas, I'm in a dead end again.But once he calmed down and stayed alone, he didn't even consciously write about him.

But it is impossible for me to force myself not to think about it. I can only try to find something to do and work harder every day. If I am tired enough, I should not be in the mood to think about it.

Hope it works.

[11 month 10 day]

In the end, I still plan to continue studying. Anyway, I don’t have to worry about money now, and studying is also very exhausting.I am also a person with a poor psychological quality. Thinking back to when I was in school, I was so scared that I couldn't sleep on the eve of all the exams.

So, if I live that kind of life again, worrying about exams and graduation every day, maybe it will be easier.And I don't want to think about the future, just looking at the present, preparing for the exam is enough to keep me busy, and it is also a good way to escape.

The problem now is, even if I continue to study, what should I learn? I don’t plan to do medical care. I have forgotten what I learned before, and picking it up now is almost the same as starting from scratch.

But although I haven't decided what to study, I can at least be sure of one thing. If I continue to study, I still want to go back to C University.

It's too late to go to graduate school this year, but this is good, and there is still a year of preparation time.

[2 month 15 day]

I have stayed in my hometown for years, and I have returned to Beijing today, temporarily living in the house that Lin Shaoqiong gave me.

When a person has a goal, he feels that his state is suddenly different. After I decided to take the postgraduate entrance examination, I was finally able to break free from the previous state, and I could think about other things.

In the past few days, I have roughly thought about the way out in the future. In fact, I have always wanted to be a teacher, and if I can, I also want to be a university professor.

In short, I plan to choose a major that is closer to this dream, such as education.Even if I can't be a university teacher, elementary school and junior high school are not bad. After all, I like children, and it just so happens that C University also has a master's degree in this major.

I should be preparing for the exam next, I hope I can get busy.

[9 month 11 day]

Facts have proved that I am not as strong as I thought. More than a year has passed, but at this specific time, I still think of Lin Shaoqiong.All the things he said to me before are still so impressive.

But I don't have time to worry about it. The exam is two or three months away. I have been away from school for many years. After a year of hard work, the final result is not satisfactory. I am not sure at all.

I watched a lecture before, saying that writing is an effective way to vent.Indeed, I like to write something when I am stressed, and maybe the habit of writing a diary is also formed in this way.

So I plan to try to write this experience. When I was with Lin Shaoqiong before, I didn't write much in my diary because I was so happy. Now I have the opportunity to make up.

Alas, hope this method works.

[11 month 24 day]

I don't know if it's a psychological effect, but I really survived for two months by writing.I wrote a lot, and I wrote it very quickly. Up to now, I have almost written the whole story, and there is only one ending left, but I don't know what to do.

I want to write a good ending, after all, it is written to vent, of course, to satisfy my desire.But I felt very unwilling - I didn't even get a good ending, so why should that character be.

But to continue writing, I don't know how to write.

Let's do that for now.

[7 month 2 day]

The admission notice was finally delivered, and I was finally able to breathe a sigh of relief.

The next step is to prepare to move.Although the school provides dormitories, I still plan to live by myself.Because of the previous experience with Lin Shaoqiong, my body was also affected by hormones, and I was still taking medicine to control it, and it was easy to affect others, so it was better to live alone.

It’s just that the school is too far away from that house, and I thought about whether to sell it altogether, because it always feels uncomfortable to use, so it’s better to get a new one.It's too risky to get a new one, maybe it's better to rent a house.

But life can finally get back on track, which is also a good thing.

[11 month 13 day]

I saw the news about Lin Shaoqiong today, he has returned to China.

I thought I was recovering well, but I didn't expect to see the news that the bad state from more than a year ago would recur again. I was irritable every day, I always had insomnia in the middle of the night, and I wanted to cry for no reason.

I also want to write something, but I have finished writing as much as I can.So this time I changed the method. I opened a blog, which is dedicated to posting the things I wrote before.

I posted an article today, with mixed emotions, I hope someone will see it, but I am afraid of being seen.I posted an article yesterday, and now I am nervous.

But after I sent it out, my heart felt relieved, and the stuffy feeling was swept away.

You can try it next, if you are in a bad mood, post an article, anyway, probably no one will read it.

I hope I can come out the day it's all posted.

[4 month 25 day]

Today I sent out the last article, and finally settled a matter of concern. I can't say I'm in a good mood, but I'm not in a bad mood either.

However, Lin Shaoqiong's matter has come to an end. It is time to write and write, and it is time to vent. I will graduate in a few months. No matter what happens in the future, I will start a new life.

You should have turned the page as soon as possible.