After we broke up, I still asked about your situation

When Tong Shen had just left, Tu Jiazhi shut himself in the room without sleeping for two days.

Shu Bai saw him either reading or writing codes every time he entered the door, worried that he would die suddenly if he survived, and finally forced him to put him on the bed to let him sleep.

After waking up, he was honest. At the dinner table, he said calmly that he was going to find Tong Shen.

Shu Bai was speechless: "Why did you go there two days ago?"

Tu Jiazhi was quiet for a while before answering: "The addresses I know are all he told me. If he is determined to run away, he will definitely not go to these places again."

"...then you still go?"

"I have no choice." Tu Jiazhi whispered, "I have no other choice."

Seeing that he was not in the right condition, Shu Bai gritted his teeth and traveled all over the country and abroad with him even though the air ticket was extremely expensive.

Afterwards, they went to harass Du Zijie again and searched all of Tong Shen's friends, but they found nothing.

Shu Bai couldn't understand Tu Jiazhi's behavior at first.

Because Tong Shen's second sister contacted them not long ago, saying that Tong Shen just wanted to go out and travel around the world, there was no danger, so they didn't have to worry.

But Tu Jiazhi was still looking for someone like crazy.

Later, he pressed him repeatedly, and Tu Jiazhi finally confessed the relationship between the two.

Shu Bai listened with mixed feelings, and persuaded: "Maybe he hasn't been mentally prepared, give him some more time and let him think about it."

I don't know if Tu Jiazhi listened, but he finally cheered up and started to study normally.

After a while, Shu Bai felt that his enthusiasm for studying was a bit scary, and he didn't know how many hours he slept every day. Anyway, when Shu Bai went to bed in the early morning, he was still studying, and when Shu Bai woke up in the morning, he was already sitting at the desk.

Although young, hard-working people can't suffer like this.

Shu Bai persuaded him tactfully: "If you continue to suffer like this, you will become bald. Xiao Shen won't like a man who is bald, right?"

Tu Jiazhi was unmoved: "He doesn't want me even if I shave my head."

Shu Bai: "...No need, really, what's the use of you now?"

Tu Jiazhi briefly stopped what he was doing, and said after a long silence, "I want to stand as tall as possible."

Shu Bai didn't understand: "What do you mean?"

"What if...he regrets it?" Tu Jiazhi said, "Since I can't find him, let him come to me."

So he spent six years standing on his own.

But before that, he found Tong Shen first.

During the few years of boring study time, his only way of leisure was to search for news about Tong Shen on the Internet aimlessly, so after Tong Shen's videos were posted on the Internet, he found out immediately.

Also looked for it for the first time.

At that time, he had already received an offer to study abroad, thinking that as long as Tong Shen was willing to turn back, he would not go anywhere.

He rushed thousands of miles to the small island, and saw the person he was dreaming of from a distance through the crowd.

At that time, Tong Shen was chatting enthusiastically with a few boys, and his smile was as flamboyant and beautiful as before, as if it had never changed.

Time did not leave any traces on him, and the past between himself and him seemed to have no effect on him.

He lived a very good life in this paradise-like place, he didn't care about himself, and it was impossible to turn back.

Unlike Tong Shen, time to Tu Jiazhi was like a giant blade of cold wind, flattening every corner of his body.

Tu Jiazhi has infinite courage, so he dared to confess to his sweetheart so fearlessly, dared to take advantage of the other person, no matter whether the other party liked it or not, and whether the other party was willing to agree or not, he had a lonely belief that this person would sooner or later One day he will love himself as much as he loves him.

Unfortunately, in less than three years, his courage was completely exhausted.

For three years, every day when he opened his eyes, he would look forward to thinking "Will he come back to see me today", and give himself a "no" answer when he went to bed at night.

The will is exhausted in repeated expectations and losses, leaving only the obsession of "climbing to higher places" in my mind.

Tu Jiazhi, 21, has no courage.

Only a little pathetic delusion remains.

Until he saw Tong Shen smiling happily at others with his own eyes, he lost even that bit of delusion.

He would never expect that person to come back to him when he opened his eyes again, and would only remind himself repeatedly: that person is also living happily in a corner of the world today, and he did not miss him.

He thought that studying abroad for a few years might make him let go, but after returning to China, his first thought was to find Tong Shen.

He rushed to the small island overnight, and it was early in the morning when he arrived. Tong Shen was so drunk that even if he stood in front of him, he couldn't recognize him. He thought he was dreaming, so he touched his face and said, "Tu Jiazhi, you Good luck now."

Tu Jiazhi's eyes were sore for a moment, and he asked him hoarsely, "I'm so promising, don't you still like me?"

Tong Shen didn't answer, but buried himself on his shoulder, crying until his front was wet, and finally said in a raving voice: "I don't want to see him."

From then on, Tu Jiazhi passed by quietly every time, and wore sunglasses in the middle of the night, for fear that he would dirty his eyes.

In a certain interview, the host asked Tu Jiazhi if he had ever been in a relationship. During the few seconds of silence, he thought: "If he doesn't love me, then it shouldn't be considered a relationship."

He was afraid that Tong Shen would laugh at him when he saw the interview and found out that he actually regarded that past as love.

He used to be brave and fearless, even if Tong Shen himself said that he would not like him, he could still persist.

But now, just an imaginary thought can completely defeat him.

He didn't even dare to think deeply, for example, did Tong Shen talk to others later, and for example, is he still single now.

As long as he doesn't think about it, he can pretend that this person has never talked to him again, and pretend that the other person is still single, so that he dares to secretly ask for a kiss when the other person is drunk.

"I've always been so mean."

While Tu Jiazhi reprimanded himself in torment, he licked Tong Shen's lips uncontrollably.

Even though he thought Tong Shen was in love with Shu Bai at the beginning, he still couldn't help falling in love with this person.

What is it now.

Even if Tong Shen really had someone else, he couldn't restrain himself from not wanting this kiss.

Except for secretly drinking a little wine on the day of adulthood, which almost caused an irreversible situation, Tu Jiazhi never dared to try drinking again.

Afterwards, he came to Tong Shen's Qing Bar. Although he didn't really want to drink, he still drank some every time to avoid being too eye-catching.

He found that he was really easy to get drunk, and he would feel a little dizzy after drinking only half a glass, so he only dared to take a small sip.

Although he had tasted many kinds before and after, Tu Jiazhi felt that each taste was not very good, and he didn't know why Tong Shen loved drinking so much.

He remembered the half bottle of unfinished cognac that Tong Shen had put on the bar earlier, and squeezed Tong Shen's face with his fingers, forcing him to open his teeth and poke in to taste the wine in his mouth.

"Tu..." Tong Shen snorted uncomfortably.

Tu Jiazhi woke up suddenly, let go of his hand and took a few steps back, his chest was like a drum beating, but his mind was reminiscing.

Sweet, and a little fruity.

He silently thought: try cognac next time.

Perhaps affected by the action just now, Tong Shen turned over and suddenly started talking in his sleep.

His voice was very low, and his words were slurred. Tu Jiazhi put his ear close to his lips for a long time to distinguish, and vaguely heard him calling his name.

But the result was too surprising to believe.

Tu Jiazhi kept his posture and knelt halfway in front of the sofa, his shoulders and back were so stiff that his shoulders began to ache, and finally he heard him utter a few clear words.

"Tu Jiazhi..." he said, "...go home."

At four o'clock in the morning, the island was as quiet as a landscape painting, and people fled from the island like ink dots in a hurry.

It was already two o'clock in the afternoon when Tong Shen woke up.

However, the dream last night was still impressive - he had a spring dream about Tu Jiazhi.

Although he did often dream of Tu Jiazhi these years, the dreams were basically not very good, which made him emo for a long time every time he woke up.

Have a spring dream... This is the first time.

"Am I already so hungry and thirsty?" He grabbed his collar and thought in horror, "It's not that bad, is it?!"

Probably because he has been intoxicated all these years, so his need for that aspect is actually not very strong...

Is it because of age?

Everyone is in their 20s like a wolf and a tiger, but he is in his thirties... Is it belated youth?

No wonder in the past Zhang Ping always said that he was frigid, and his feelings were because he developed late?

This dream made Tong Shen feel uncomfortable for several days, and every time he thought about it, he felt that he was simply wretched.

Due to the huge area of ​​psychological shadow, he couldn't help but pray that he would never dream tonight before falling asleep every night.

After the Mid-Autumn Festival, the weather gradually turns cold, but the island is still like summer all year round, so there are more and more tourists.

The bar and the homestay are full every day. Tong Shen knows that many people come to see him, so he will not leave unless necessary, but he will have to leave in a few days because his father's [-]th birthday is coming soon. .

Father Tong lived and traveled all over the world when he turned [-]. He was too busy with work, and his birthday was also spent on the plane.

He is now seventy, and although he is still in good health, the children in the family are worried and advise him to rest, so this time Tong's family is planning to hold a reception for his birthday. At that time, some business partners will be invited to celebrate his birthday and announce his retirement. By the way, he will consolidate Take a look at the status of the two newcomers to power.

Although Tong Shen likes to be lively, he doesn't like the reception held at home very much, because when his parents introduce him, he will be put together with his brothers and sisters, and the way the guests look at him is really different from the way they look at his brothers and sisters.

Anyway, the protagonists of this reception were his father and his eldest brother and second sister. Tong Shen went back and gave Tong father a gift, and said a few nice words, which made the old man happy, so he took the opportunity to make a request, not wanting to go downstairs to meet people .

Unexpectedly, if Dad opened his mouth, the second sister gave him a smack first, and severely criticized him: "It's okay to be self-willed, what day is today? You are already 30 years old, why are you so ignorant!"

Tong Shen rubbed his head and looked around, and found that his mother, who doted on him the most, didn't make a sound. He knew that today he couldn't escape no matter what, so he had to go back to the house to change clothes.

He purposely procrastinated and dawdled for time, wanting to wait until the opening remarks were finished before going over.

The family knew that he didn't want to face guests with his brothers and sisters, so they turned a blind eye and didn't force him.

When he went downstairs, the guests downstairs were already chatting around in small groups, and his parents were leading the brothers and sisters to chat with several business leaders.

Tong Shen avoided the crowd, went to the corner to get a glass of wine, turned his head and wanted to go to the balcony to blow some air, and happened to bump into Du Zijie who was also hiding there smoking.

"Yo." Du Zijie laughed eccentrically when he saw him, "Which fairy is this coming out?"

The author has something to say:

Jie Ge: Do you know how I got here these past few years? ! (Hoarse