Qinghong

The picture accompanying the headline news is a photo with strong color impact and shocking, the majestic golden red morning glow, the solid dormitory building, and the black shadow leaping down.I looked at the photo and was speechless in a daze.

What is he thinking in his heart, does he have unfinished business, is he disappointed in everyone.

I took out a cigarette, held it in the palm of my hand, stared at it for a while, broke off the cigarette and threw it into the trash can.

It was very boring, I closed the paper journal, stood up, and walked towards the door of the office.Kang Yanfeng stopped me halfway, and he said, "You, just, oh... my condolences."

I looked at him, nodded, and walked out in silence.

I have already recognized the reality, I am not a god, I cannot save Ning Qing, nor can I save Xiao Ke, followed by a deep sense of powerlessness.I can talk about differential topology in seminars, talk about Archimedes spiral in bars, I am proud that my papers are published in JDG, and list projects in detail on my resume, but people around me leave me one by one, To the feast of death.

"Teacher Zou."

I raised my head in response, Xia Xianxian stood in front of me, her eyes were red and the whites of her eyes were bloodshot: "Xiao Ke is dead."

"I know." I said.

Xia Xianxian raised her hand to grab me, and her slender and white fingers firmly grabbed my wrist: "Teacher, you can still save me." Because she was emotional, her expression was slightly ferocious, "Teacher, please, save me." help me."

I don't want to marry her, that's not my responsibility.

"I was forced to go on two blind dates. One was ten years older than me, and the other was 12 years older than me." Xia Xianxian said, "I don't want to marry them, I will be forced to die."

"Teacher, I will never pester you. Once I give birth to a child, I will divorce you immediately." Xia Xianxian said, "Help me."

I looked into her eyes, she looked like a doe who had nowhere to go, and her eyes were full of determination.

Ning Qing is dead, Xiao Ke is dead, but I can still save her.

She was keenly aware of my wavering, and gave the final blow: "Teacher, I don't want to die."

I stood on the edge of the cliff, took a wrong step, and the gravel fell. I thought to myself, it's just getting married, and I can save her.

"Yeah." I uttered a monotone.

Xia Xianxian looked at me in surprise, her eyes were extremely bright, like a traveler who had survived a desperate situation, she said incoherently: "I'm going right now, and I'll call home."

She turned and ran away, and I stood where I was, feeling terribly sad.

My phone rang and I answered, "Hello?"

"Lan Sheng." Qin Xuan's voice came, and she asked in a low voice, "Are you okay?"

"I..." I wiped my face, "I'm not good."

"Want to come out for a chat? I'm treating you." Qin Xuan said.

"Okay." I agreed, I urgently needed to find someone to talk to, and my intuition told me that if I kept the matter in my heart, something would happen.

"I'll send you the address." Qin Xuan hung up the phone after speaking.

Wechat received the location of the restaurant from Qin Xuan, so I took a taxi there.

The taxi stopped in front of a well-decorated dessert shop. I pushed the door and got off. Qin Xuan stood at the door and looked at me with concern: "Are you still recovering?"

I smiled bitterly: "How can I slow down."

"Let's go, I'll treat you to mango pudding." Qin Xuan said.

We walked into the restaurant and sat in the corner by the window. Qin Xuan ordered a large plate of mango ice cream and two balls of strawberry ice cream.She handed me a spoon: "Eat, talk while eating."

Qin Xuan is my classmate in high school, we both know each other well, I feel free to tell her everything that happened today.

"You have someone you like." Qin Xuan said, "It's a man."

"Hmm." I nodded.

"Then you have to marry your student." Qin Xuan said.

I continued to nod: "Yeah."

"It's a pity, if you were a straight man, you would definitely say 'this is a good thing'." Qin Xuan said, "Skip the stage of dating and get a child for free."

I glanced at her: "I don't like children."

Qin Xuan shrugged: "So you are not an ordinary person."

I ate a piece of diced mango and watched the passing traffic outside the window: "Maybe this is my whole life, getting married and having children, taking care of the family until I retire."

"You can't accept your fate." Qin Xuan said, "Follow your heart."

I sneered and shook my head.

"Lansheng, why aren't you being selfish?" Qin Xuan asked suspiciously, "Why do you insist on saving everyone?"

I choke, I clearly remember that I used to be a selfish person, I was annoyed at Ning Qing's behavior of saving others regardless of safety, I regarded Ning Hong as Ning Qing's shadow just for my own happiness, but now I... what is it? changed me?

Is it Ning Qing's suicide note?

Or am I endlessly escaping?

"Because I lost someone very important," I said, "and I'm trying to make up for it by redeeming someone else."

"You clearly know that no one will be that person." Qin Xuan said, "You are deceiving yourself and others."

"Yeah," I admit graciously, "that's what I'm best at."

Qin Xuan looked at me sympathetically: "Lan Sheng, let yourself go."

How should I let myself go?I dug a spoonful of soft ice into my mouth, and the afternoon sun shone warmly on me through the window.

I also want to let myself go.

Holding the spoon, I lowered my head and poked the ice into a puddle of water, saying, "I don't want to get married."

"Then it doesn't matter." Qin Xuan said, "Go to school and take a long vacation, take all your savings, and buy a plane ticket."

I have to say, my heart was moved. I looked at Qin Xuan, her eyes were crystal clear and full of sunshine, and I asked, "Can I?"

"Of course you can." Qin Xuan encouraged, "You tell the dean about Xia Xianxian and apply for a student change, and he will definitely agree. If you really marry a student, your dean will be furious."

I took a sip of ice water: "But I promised her."

"So what." Qin Xuan said, "She didn't record it, so she can't prove anything. You just run away, and the dean will take care of the rest."

I bowed my head and said nothing.

Qin Xuan urged: "There is nothing difficult in this world, as long as you are willing to run."

With my mood swinging, I scooped out the last piece of strawberry ice cream and stuffed it into my mouth.

"What do you think?" Qin Xuan asked.

I nodded, but hesitated again: "She is my student...I want to help her."

Qin Xuan asked sharply: "How to help her? Pay for your reputation and your whole life?"

I said, "Of course not, I'll think about it again."

Qin Xuan sighed, "Lansheng, I hope you live well."

Hearing the familiar words, I remembered Xiao Ke's last words to me, [I hope you have a good life].

I looked blankly at the bright sunlight outside the window and said, "Thank you."

"Since we met again, you always have this expression." Qin Xuan pointed at me, "You have a dull face, and you have nothing in your eyes. You said you have someone you like, is he the best man at the Hongxilou wedding?"

"Hmm." I agreed.

"You are getting married, where is he?" Qin Xuan asked.

"I didn't tell him," I said, "we... had a fight."

"No wonder you always show up alone." Qin Xuan said, and she patted me on the shoulder boldly, "It's okay, if you don't go to the old one, don't come to the new one. I'll introduce you to some handsome and sweet little fairies."

"...No need." On the day I went to the bar, although I drank a little too much, I was vaguely impressed by the behavior of those people, and I said, "It's fine to be alone."

"Alright, anyway, give me a call before you leave." Qin Xuan said.

I looked at Qin Xuan, she had traits that I admired very much, she was generous and unrestrained, as if there was nothing in the world that she couldn't solve, I asked, "Are you alone now?"

"At first I wanted to chase your student, but considering the situation, forget it." Qin Xuan said, "I'd better find someone who is cute and cute, it doesn't matter if she's a bit aggressive."

As we were talking, the waiter brought us a colorful milkshake.

Qin Xuan said, "Huh? We didn't order this."

The waiter said, "It was delivered by the customer over there."

"To whom?" Qin Xuan asked.

I looked over curiously. A girl with pink shoulder-length hair was lying on the back of the chair with folded arms and smiled at Qin Xuan. She turned her eyes to me. She was startled and quickly turned her back and sat down.

Qin Xuan snorted: "Little girl." After speaking, she took a sip of the colorful milkshake.

"She's my student." I said, "She's called Lian Junya."