Hard to change

On the third day after Yu hoped to land in Paris, he met someone he never expected to meet——Qu Jiayou.

It turned out that Qu Jiayou applied to this school at his own expense, saying that he wanted to study photography.

And because he speaks French very well and is handsome, he easily convinced the French boy who originally shared the dormitory with Yu Hope.

The reason why the boy agreed was because Qu Jiayou said that he was Yu Hope's suitor, and he came here specially from home to abroad.

So the kind boy was fooled like this.

When Yu Xixi asked him, he was very frank.

But it was false to say that he lied to the boy to pursue someone. He just thought that since he was in a foreign country, since he could live with someone he knew, why didn't he try to fight for it.

Although Yu wished to live with him and felt a little awkward, it was undeniable that Qu Jiayou's argument was very reasonable.

If it was before, he would definitely choose to live with other people in order not to misunderstand Qin Xiu, but now...it doesn't matter anymore.

At least two acquaintances live together and can take care of each other.

And the most important thing is that Qu Jiayou has been acting very natural and measured since meeting him, as if he really is just a classmate with Yu Hope.

This made him feel very comfortable and relaxed.

So after a long time, Yu Xixi and Qu Jiayou seemed to have really become friends. Except when they were not together in class, they were basically together at other times.

Perhaps it was precisely because he regarded Qu Jiayou as a friend that Yu hoped to cry and say those words in front of Qu Jiayou when he was drunk like that on Christmas Day in the first year.

"Today is his birthday," Yu Xiong sat on his bed with his knees hugged, staring out the window blankly, "Has he eaten cake? Has anyone accompanied him for his birthday? Did you eat apples yesterday... did you... think pass me..."

Yu hoped to start crying suddenly while talking, startling Qu Jiayou who was squatting in front of him, and before anyone asked, he started to giggle again.

Just like that, cry for a while, laugh for a while.

"I miss him... Qu Jiayou, I miss him..." Yu hoped to tilt his head and smiled at Qu Jiayou, but tears fell one after another uncontrollably.

"I hope...you're drunk." Qu Jiayou frowned.

Yu hoped to bury his face in his knees and whispered, "I regret it..."

"What? What are you regretting?" Qu Jiayou approached and asked.

"Regret..." Yu Xiong fell asleep on the bed halfway through his words, leaving Qu Jiayou to cover him with a quilt dumbfounded.

He did regret it, and he regretted it from the moment he got on the plane.

For almost a year now, he has been regretting why he didn't slap Qin Xiu before leaving.

But compared to this, he regretted why he went home so early that day.

He even wondered if he would not have seen or heard those things if he had gone back later that day.

Then he and Qin Xiu are still okay now...

It seemed that this nearly year was not curing him, but torturing him.

Recalling that day when he went back to pack his things, he found that most of the things in the house were bought by the two of them together.

As big as beds and sofas, as small as socket toothbrushes...

They can be found in every corner of the house.

Even in the corner of the guest room, Yu hoped to find the first sweeping robot that was stuck and out of power for an unknown period of time.

He took it out, cleaned it, charged it, and put it to work with another robot he bought later.

Yu hoped to turn around the whole house several times that day, and in the end, except for important documents and a few pieces of clothes that he often wore, he really took away basically nothing else.

The house was rented by the two of them together at the beginning, and I don't know if Qin Xiu continued to live there after he left.

When leaving the house, Yu Xixi put down the two lovers' coats that he was reluctant to throw away, and only took the ring with him.

The key to the door was placed on the shoe cabinet by the door when he left.

A week after arriving in France, Han Fei made his first phone call.

"Hope, how about it? Are you still used to it?"

"Well, it's okay." Yu hoped to answer.

"Have you seen Qu Jiayou?" Han Fei said, "I didn't expect that kid to really run over."

"I see," Yu Xixi said, "we share a dormitory."

"That's good. People who know each other can take care of each other. I feel more at ease now."

"Well, he speaks foreign languages ​​very well."

"That..." Han Fei hesitated, "I thought about it and thought I should tell you that someone came to the company to look for me yesterday and asked me if I knew where you were. I said no, and I will tell you It was said that you resigned, so I answered him in the same way."

"...I'm sorry, brother." Yu Hope's tone was very light, but the strength of holding the phone became much heavier. If you listen carefully, you can hear his already unsteady breathing.

"You're welcome with me!" Han Fei said haha, and then hesitated for a moment before saying: "But...he seems to have fought with someone, and when he came, his face was still injured, and his eyes were red and scary. It looks like... …not too good."

Yu hoped to take a deep breath, but his tone was still indifferent: "Tell him not to look for you again, just say, say that I don't have contact with anyone."

"...Okay, I see." Han Fei sighed heavily, "I made up a sentence to send him away, I don't think he will come again..."

"Well, thank you brother."

"They said don't be so polite to me," Han Fei said with a smile, "If you really want to thank me, then help me take care of Xiao Qu, and I'll wait for you to come back."

"Time flies quickly..." Yu Xixi said.

After that, Han Fei chatted with him casually and hung up the phone. It seemed that no matter how many times they called, they never heard him talk about Qin Xiu again.

The name Qin Xiu seems to have gradually disappeared from Yu Hope's life over time.

Until the Christmas day of the first year abroad, those memories that Yu hoped he thought he had completely forgotten suddenly flooded his mind like a flood.

Maybe it was because he didn't want to face it early in the morning, so he deliberately stayed up late in the dormitory watching learning videos on Christmas Eve, just so that he could sleep all day without Christmas the next day.

But he overestimated himself.

Just because it was night after waking up, the loneliness and longing seemed to be magnified infinitely in an instant, and the feeling of suffocation and suffocation filled every trace of air in the room.

Every time I inhale a little, my heart hurts a little, and my nose is also sore.

Yu hoped to remember that he did not accompany Qin Xiu on his birthday last year, and then Qin Xiu came to Dou Nannan's house to look for him, hugging him and telling him his birthday wish.

"It won't work if you express your wish...Stupid or not..." Yu hoped to sit on the bed and look at the moon outside the window, crying and laughing.

"Happy birthday," he said softly.

When Qu Jiayou came back, he had almost finished drinking the beer in the refrigerator, lying on the bed full of nonsense, and the floor was full of empty cans.

He seemed to have a dream in a trance, dreaming that Qin Xiu came to him, dreaming that Qin Xiu was crying and hugging him, dreaming that Qin Xiu said he missed him over and over again...

But then Tong Yan appeared in a wedding dress, she hit him with the bouquet in her hand, scolded him, raised her hand and slapped him hard...

It was already noon the next day after Yu hoped to wake up from the dream. He had a terrible headache, and he had no strength in his whole body. The quilt that should have been covering him was also lying on the ground pitifully.

The only thing that is gratifying is that Qu Jiayou looked normal after he came back, he didn't ask or say much, he just reminded him to close the door when drinking alone in the dormitory.

Yu hopes to have three Christmases without Qin Xiu.

Every time he was drunk and messed up to spend the days that tormented him.

The same drunkenness, the same crying and laughing, the same nightmare...

That kiss was like a curse, following him the whole time, tormenting him for three years.

But every Christmas he still says happy birthday to the air.

He would also use the landline in the dormitory to call Qin Xiu's previous number, but unfortunately he failed once in the past three years.

Not only did he change his number, Qin Xiu also changed.

In the past three years, what he could see was either Qin Xiu in his memories or Qin Xiu in his dreams.

He went crazy thinking about Qin Xiu, and even cried in front of Qu Jiayou on Christmas Day of the second year and called Qin Xiu's no longer used number.

Say you miss him, say you regret it, say you can forgive him...

But Qin Xiu won't hear it anymore, and he said it too late.

Yu Hope sometimes feels like a psycho.

Usually he looks very normal, and he always looks serious and keeps strangers away.

I have studied here for three years, but my only friend is Qu Jiayou.

Those who wanted to associate with him, or pursued him, were coldly and directly rejected by him.

Even Qu Jiayou would sigh sometimes, saying that he was obviously not such a person before.

In the past, Yu hoped that although he was a bit introverted, at least he would not always reject people thousands of miles away like he is now.

It seems like he only becomes himself on rare occasions now.

For example, when he was drunk on Christmas Day, he would cry and laugh, and let people see his fragile and true side.

Another example is Dou Nannan, or his parents. He only laughs and talks a lot when video chatting with him. Under the circumstances, you will see him smile.

In three years, Yu Xixi, who was not very talkative, became even more taciturn.

Although the two of them lived in the same dormitory, except for the necessary politeness and politeness, Yu Hope really rarely took the initiative to say anything to him.

Most of the time Qu Jiayou took the initiative to ask, or chatted with him about some schoolwork, and only then would he talk more seriously.

It's as if this failed love has taken away Yu Hope's enthusiasm little by little in the past three years.

He struggled repeatedly between regretting and forgetting, until finally he was covered in bruises...

He told those who cared about him that he had let go a long time ago, but in reality only Qu Jiayou, who was a bystander, knew best.

In fact, he never let go of it for a moment, he has been torturing himself.

Three years, over and over again.

The author has something to say:

I have made an appointment with the person who wrote this article and the article of "Tule", so I look forward to it! ! !