[Spell Back to Battle] Asuka

66.

"If you don't plan to stop it, are you going to just watch it like this?" Shi Er put out the cigarette, and said suddenly, "The people here don't look like people who stand by and do nothing."

"Of course not, I will help her remove all obstacles." Xia Youjie pinched the black ball formed by the Zerg, and there was an almost devout gleam in his dark pupils, "There is a clear division of labor, which was agreed at the beginning." Yes. Some things are not suitable for her to do, so she doesn't have to do them herself, just leave it to me."

"Of course, some things are my responsibilities." Gojo Satoru propped his chin, looking at the burning sunset by the window and in the sky, "It's something I have done a long time ago to eliminate corrupt high-level officials with an iron fist. The idea of ​​​​combined with peaceful evolution, such a change is more efficient."

Shir raised his eyebrows slightly.

He didn't like, or rather disliked the two Alphas present here, and he had fought several death battles with them in the past.But now they sat together and reached a consensus with "tacit understanding".

...Although using the word tacit understanding is really disgusting, he doesn't want to have a tacit understanding with this kind of Alpha.

"Everyone should perform their duties, she just needs to let go and do what she wants to do." Gojo Satoru said, "These things should not have been undertaken by her in the first place, and she has already shouldered enough."

"Maybe I'm not the one to untangle her - but I can do something else, like make her hesitating question go away."

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"The Presbyterian House Raises Tigers: Internal Struggles Cause Most of the Ten Elders' Deaths and Injuries"

"How did the recidivist Xia Youjie get into the imperial capital?"It was due to the House of Elders' own fault"

"The Consul was brutally assassinated, and a death message was left on the scene!"The emperor fainted after hearing the news"

"The People's Election Advance!Hisakawa Asuka received 60.00% public support! "

"Vote: Will Hisakawa Asuka Become the No.1 Omega Consul in the History of the Empire?" "

The new consul will only be me.

I turned off the screen and rubbed my forehead wearily.

The House of Elders and the Parliament are in chaos, the royal family is unmanaged, and the military has all the power. No matter what the public opinion is, I will become the new consul with the support of the military.

We've just been off a speech -- General Elle, as soon as he heard that things were going well, sent me to appease and win the hearts of the people.

Her choice was right, and the people at the scene looked at me as if they saw the savior.In this extremely chaotic time, the strength of me described by Gojo Satoru has become a sense of security and a bonus item. They think that I can protect them from the terrorist Xia Youjie.

But they don't know that the behavior of terrorists is inseparable from me.

"...Is this what you guys discussed when you were in Prison Star?" I lay on the sofa, turned my head to look at Shi Er, and for a moment didn't know what kind of expression I should show, "Wu Tiao also participated?"

"This is also an iron-fisted cleaning in line with your plan. Those who die are hopeless politicians who are more disgusting than the worst prisoners in Prison Star." Shier, who had just taken a shower, with his wet hair on his head, said carelessly. Leaning gently on the other end of the sofa, "Xia Youjie edited part of the list of political enemies I saw on your desk. There should be nothing wrong with it. You don't need to feel guilty."

"... I don't feel any guilt unexpectedly, those guys can only say that they deserve it." I sighed, with complicated emotions, "I just... feel a little..."

"They all assassinated you for two hundred rounds together, and you only paid back one round." Shi Er lazily said, "Justifiable self-defense, it's not surprising - I'm a little surprised that you hesitated, it can't be called massacre, It's just a clean break, didn't you handle this smoothly when you were on Prison Star?"

"Probably because there is no benefit to killing them on Prison Star, but it involves huge political interests here." I frowned and replied, "I always feel that these things are not what I should do." ...the Omegas expect the leader to be a perfect man, the perfect victim in a criminal case, won only by the most orthodox means..."

"This kind of situation only exists in their fantasy." Shi Er sneered, "It's fine if they think so, how old are you this year?"

I gave him a look of disgust: when he turned his head, he threw the boiled water on my hair, like a large dog drying its hair.

Throwing my towel to him casually, I held my chin and lit a cigarette: "I don't really want to fulfill their fantasies, I just... always feel that I can do better."

——I feel that I can completely distinguish revenge psychology from ideals, so that my motives appear purer.Instead of mixing those ugly emotions and intentions like now, standing on the corpses of the predecessors, doing things no different from other politicians, fighting for power and profit.

Shi Er caught the towel and suddenly stopped for a second.

He grabbed the towel and put it on his head, wiped it off twice, then lowered his head and said, "I don't mean to praise you—but you've done a good job."

"I always feel that it's not enough. Maybe I'm just such a greedy person. I always wonder if there is a better way..." I muttered, "Dry your hair first, don't rely on Alpha's good physique Just put the water on your wet hair, and I won’t talk to you when the migraine is humming at my door in the middle of the night.”

"It's your own insomnia that makes you think I'm humming?" Shi Er said dissatisfiedly, "And you really don't have any team spirit—why do you always want to solve everything by yourself, you are such an arrogant guy .”

I turned a deaf ear to his comments, stood up without turning my head, and said, "Anyway, wipe your hair quickly, and I'll go to the bathroom."

"Come out quickly, there will be guests later." Shi Er reluctantly said behind my back.

I ignored his words, shut myself in the bathroom, locked the door—and lay down on the sink, covering my mouth.

Disgusting...disgusting.

Even now, he is still hesitating about some irrelevant things... This is obviously completely meaningless.

I can't forget what Kamo Xianlun said to me, and his words are still lingering in my mind: He said that I am a cowardly, incompetent, useless trash who can't protect anything, and all tragedies are caused by me.

What happened made me feel that some of his words were true: I must change, abandon the shortcomings of my character, and become a decisive ruler who is ruthless to the enemy.

And I did, trying to change, to do things I hadn't considered before, to be "strong".In his speeches, he was full of lies, deceived the people, assassinated political opponents, and deceived allies.

My "strength" is obtained in exchange for something - my biggest reliance is obtained from the transformation of Kamo Xianlun, and I am just the most successful one among his experiments.This data comes from the countless bloody experiments he has done, and it was finally applied to me.

I feel like I'm drawing blood from other subjects... including Satoshi.This kind of power makes me restless, like sitting in the sea of ​​corpses and blood.

Although it was not me who personally assassinated political opponents, nor did I order them, I can completely imagine why they acted without telling me-they don't want me to feel guilty.

But I just feel that I have shirked responsibility. I am a person with vested interests, but because of my indecision, I let others bear the responsibility that should have been borne by myself.

I violated my principles and compromised with reality, and I was not thorough enough and hesitant.I began to doubt whether my ideals were correct, and whether the path I chose deviated-can I really do well?As the consul, will I really not be emptied by the military and become a puppet of General Ellie?It was I who sought skin from the tiger, and it was I who regretted it.

What a... disgusting feeling.I was disappointed in myself and felt that others must be disappointed in me.

I want to pluck off the scales, I want to cut off my hands, I want to show the bones of those bloody ugly hands, I want to cut my own throat, I can't tell demagogic lies anymore, I want to bleed and burn my hair Lie Yan, burn everything in yourself, not even ashes.

I hated myself so much more than I hated anyone else.

The red, bloody scales were thrown into the sink. I lay down on the sink and retched violently, almost spitting out my lungs.

My eyes turned black due to lack of oxygen, I hugged my shoulders tightly and tore off the scales on my shoulders.The scales are already like skin to me, and the nerve endings spread to the roots of the scales, and every time a piece is pulled off, there is a sharp pain.

It hurts, but that's the only moment I feel free.Maybe death would be a better relief, so that I don't have to suffer so much: the mental torture is more unbearable than the physical pain.From the moment Nanami-senpai fell down, or from the moment Satoka appeared in front of me, my spirit has not been at peace for a moment.I am a sinner, and those sins linger on my scars like maggots.

And my scars will never heal, because the dead will never come back to me.And all I've tried to heal it is to cut it open further, letting the stinking pus drip from the wound.

My heart is still beating, but only beating.It couldn't inject warm enough blood into my limbs, it just made me go cold.

I staggered and leaned against the sink, turned my back, lowered my head and panted heavily.Hot tears flowed down with blood.

Maybe I've gone crazy.

I closed my eyes and thought.

But it doesn't matter anymore, I can't get relief at all.

The door was kicked open heavily, and the light shone in from outside the door, reflecting on my eyelids in the mirror.

Someone broke through the door and slapped me hard across the face.

I bumped into the mirror unexpectedly and opened my eyes: "Who? What about Shier? Why did someone enter..."

My voice froze suddenly.

The man who would never appear in front of me again leaned over to look at me, his pale face flushed with fury.

"I don't remember ever teaching you to torture yourself," he raged. "What are you doing? Is this what you've decided and learned?"

My heart began beating vigorously again.The blood poured into my limbs and brain, and the cold fingers were pressed together.

"...Senior Qihai?" I called out his name in disbelief.

He didn't answer me, but suddenly hugged me heavily.My head was pressed into his warm chest, his familiar, reassuring scent on my breath.

"...It's me." His deep and hoarse voice was full of forbearance, and some warm liquid dripped on my neck.

"To be so harsh on myself...you...you are...a hopeless idiot."

I hugged him tightly, grabbed the shirt on his back, and cried uncontrollably: "Then tell me yourself, what should I do...!"

"I will." He whispered solemnly, "I will teach you... we all will."

"So stop being here alone, fly back to the ground, stop -- and then fly again, higher up, where you want to be."