[tutor] life

███:

I never thought it would end like this.

You wouldn't know it, you left a deep impression on my mind when we first met.Black hair and eyes, with a gentle aura, I never imagined that I could have such close contact with animals.

You reach out to me.You say your name and I remember it.

You are the first stranger who will reach out to me like that.

But since that day, I haven't seen you again.I would sneak up to that place and only have the Chihuahua barking at me.I was looking forward to it, but lost again and again.

I don’t know if my wish on my birthday was successful. I stood in the center of the park, but I seemed to be isolated from others. I don’t know why I remember it so clearly. It happened when I was very young. I saw a person standing up suddenly .

I see you.

You waved at me, and my mood suddenly brightened.Really happy.

can i be friends with you

After the second time, I haven't seen you for a long time.Just not seen, but you are everywhere in my life.Every time the list is released, I rush out to read it the fastest, because every time your name will appear in the first position.Although I was ridiculed every time why I still looked forward to seeing the last one, in fact, I didn't pay attention to my own name.

I thought it was a weird combination.We are all without suspense, No.1 and last.

I have seen your figure in the crowd, and I have also hidden in the public and looked up to you as a student representative.

You are so dazzling, so far away from me.

Until I entered junior high school, I recognized your back under the list, and summoned up the courage to talk to you. Unexpectedly, you still remembered my name.

It's very kind of you to know me.

It's great that we're in the same class.

It's so nice of me to be able to be a little closer to you.

It seems that since I entered junior high school, my luck has become better. I can not only get in touch with you, but also be at the same table with you. When I was a child, I was surrounded by ridicule, but when I arrived in junior high school, although the ridicule still existed, it I also faced people with pure eyes.

I think you can do anything.To be number one, to be the squad leader, to get along well with everyone, and to be able to smile at me—not polite, not fake, but a smile that comes from the heart and reaches the eyes.

I thought my life could go on like this—and I would be very satisfied if it went on like this.

I met a turning point in my life, my teacher reborn.

Because of him, I rushed to confess to you...maybe not called confession, I still remember the feeling at that time, I just regret it, I want to be friends with you, I want to get closer to an existence like you, that was my years wish since.

Later, my life became dire and hot, what mafia, what Judaime, I was not the kind of person who could bear those things at all.

——Looking back on it now is very interesting, after all, I have come to where I am today.

Am I able to change?I didn't know the answer at the time.I'm inferior, I'm cowardly, I'm a failure.

Everyone calls me "Waste Chai Gang", my life is like a puddle of mud.

I am thrilled and excited that you accepted my friend's position.

Destiny is really wonderful, even though it is mixed with reborn moisture, I still reaped the friendship of Hayato and Takeshi.It is an irreplaceable emotion and a treasure worth cherishing.

The number of friends around me has gradually increased, and the things I have been longing for have been obtained through the hands of reborn.

They bond with me, and so do you, but differently.

You dissociate from my world, connected with an inseparable thread, but refuse to go deeper and closer.

I didn't understand it when I was a child, but now I see it clearly.

you do not know?Actually know?You reject me?Accepting again?

You are complex, complicated and contradictory.Your eyes look at everything and leave everything behind.

I made the same choice as reborn.Maybe he is for me and I am for you.

I respect your choice.

If you don't want to, then so be it.

In the past, I was glad that under the many flaws, I was as smart as you but I never saw it.The conjecture brought about by super intuition was subconsciously left behind by me. In fact, my disguise was completely seen through by you, but I was still unwilling to reveal it.

I understand you, just like I understand myself who once rejected "this world".

I walked step by step, we eventually went in different directions, turned our heads, but we could still see each other.

When I heard that you and Ah Jing became lovers, I couldn't describe how I felt.Shocked, sure enough, of course, and...disappointed and blessed.

Disappointed with myself.Best wishes to you all.

Ah Jing is a wonderful person, it is true for you, and it is also true for me.He is purer than you, and his eyes are full of light.His life is bright.

He is good, you are chaos, and I am evil.

My hands were bloody and dirty.

You stand there, isolated from everything, there are very few people in your eyes, but you are infinitely tolerant to "them", you indulge "them", like treating ignorant children, right or wrong, tumbling on the road of life Climb without looking back, and you get farther and farther away, and you don't try to chase, but when "they" are tired, stop, turn around a little, and you are always there, smiling, supporting, encouraging, and tolerant.

He bathed in the sun, exuding a warm breath, which made people want to get closer.

The light first reaches out to you, and you will joyfully escape from the embrace of darkness.The closer you are, the smaller the shadow and the warmer your heart.

I thought so too, but I was stuck in a dark place where I couldn't get out.

I think you are more like Daikong.

An all-encompassing void.

You always surprise me, the amulet you gave me, broke and burned, but saved my life, just like you—abandoning yourself and leaving me behind.

I regret it, regret it very much, and my heart hurts so badly.The first time I realized that I had a conceit, Rambo's bazooka told me that you might encounter an accident ten years ago, but when you were by my side ten years later, I felt that nothing would happen.

I did not protect you.Even if you automatically withdraw from "our" circle, even if the target is not you, you still gave your life for me.

I have no face to face Ah Jing.Don't even dare to visit you when he visits you.I don't know how I explained the bad news to him, but I only remember that at the door of the emergency room, I sat decadently on the chair by the door, with your blood all over my hands, I heard footsteps and raised my head, seeing him pale s face.

No blame, just sit back and wait with me.

At the moment when the doctor announced his death, his eyes finally lost their light.

The memory of that moment, like seeing the ring on the ring finger of my left hand, makes my head scream wildly and my heart beat so violently that I feel tingling.

In the drawer of my desk, I always keep an unopened bottle of painkillers.It stays there until it expires, and then it's thrown away for a new bottle.

I was banned from swallowing by Reborn on the grounds that I was smiling like a normal person when faced with other wounds no matter how bad they were.

I know it doesn't really do anything for heartache.

Now my only hope... I have a plane ticket in three days' time, and my heart is selfishly hoping that that moment will come.

████

Sawada Tsunayoshi

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i want to love you.

You always hold me.

But I can only squat humblely at the intersection and wait for you to pass by,

Silly holding your handwriting on my test paper.

Seeing you have been so good,

Then hold the hand of someone as good as you.

Passing the sunflowers blooming in the garden,

Watch them face the sun.

It was an unspoken chase,

Forbearing and silent.

like me,

Always look at the light.

My big empty.

I want to see you.

The author has something to say:

This is a letter written by 270. It has not been sent. It is impossible to send it. It will be impossible in a lifetime. If you want to send it, you can only go directly to the ground.You can taste the emotion of 270 by yourself first.

The title is blank, he didn’t write it, and he usually writes something like “respected XX” or “dear XX” at the beginning, and he blotted out the concluding words (usually blessings or something) at the end.Because it was written in Italian, after he finished writing it, he felt that it was star-studded, and it was too easy to reveal his emotions (that is, he thought it was explicit, but he wrote it subconsciously, and he read and checked it after writing it), so he painted it.

The part written in "" in the middle means that he used more force when writing.

Behind the letter is the confession of 270 [Inner Heart].