longing for

Accidents always come before good things come.

Song Zongyan didn't consciously stick flowers and grass, Wen Qiu didn't mention it on the surface, but he thought about it in his heart, and planned to wait until the winter solstice on the 22nd to meet again.

So this meeting was endowed with great anticipation.All the days when we can't see each other have to rely on the date on the calendar that is leaping forward and approaching day by day to survive lovesickness.

As a result, on December 12, two days before the trip to Hong Kong, something went wrong with Song Zongyan, and he was temporarily stumped by something.He apologized on the video call, and promised in a gentle tone that he would rush over as soon as the exam on his side was over, but it would be a day later.

One day later, the birthday has passed, so what's the point.

Wen Qiu looked at the person on the screen, and suddenly felt intense disappointment. He quickly hung up the video, a white light flashed, and Song Zongyan, who was still talking, suddenly disappeared from the screen.

Wen Qiu took a deep breath. It is easy to be unable to restrain emotions and words in face-to-face conversations. He didn't want to quarrel with Song Zongyan because of this, after all, the other party had his last resort.But he really wanted to get angry, no one would be happy if he was let go, and no one could survive a happy time.

The uneasiness and restlessness in his heart surfaced again.

Song Zongyan knew that he was unhappy, so he didn't call to get in trouble, and sent a message instead.Wen Qiu took out his mobile phone, looked at it for a while, and then went back.

There is time to think about typing, and the text is always beautiful.Wen Qiu pressed the keyboard slowly, and said calmly as much as possible: "Let me be quiet."

Speaking of Jingjing, Song Zongyan really stopped bothering.Wen Qiu turned over and lay on the bed. He returned home today, in an empty room, and when he turned around, he saw a round globe standing quietly on the table.

But that's just a little distance.This is what he said himself.

The rustling sound rang in the ears, and the snake crawling slowly on the grass moved forward aimlessly, and the end was invisible.

It was a quiet night.When he woke up the next morning, there was no change in his phone. Wen Qiu smiled angrily. He is used to sending the weather forecast to the other party every morning, and this morning was no exception. The weather forecast on the 21st showed that there would be snow in Beijing.Even though they broke up last night, Wen Qiu still sent the weather forecast.

But there was no response after sending it for half a day. During this period of time, waiting for a reply has become the norm. Busy students really don't have time to stare at their phones 24 hours a day.Wen Qiu can understand.

Song Zongyan replied half an hour later: "Well, it seems to be snowing in Beijing tomorrow. Have you had breakfast yet?"

Wen Qiu said, "I ate fish soup noodles."

Song Zongyan returned after a while: "Didn't you eat in the cafeteria?"

"No, the class in the morning is relatively late, I went home last night."

"Hmm, the fish noodle soup at the one on West Street?"

Wen Qiu felt bored: "I finished my breakfast, and we are still talking about this topic."

Song Zongyan was kind and generous: "Should the birthday present be sent to you in advance or should I take it to Hong Kong?"

It took him a lot of effort to prepare his mind well and not think about the fact that the other party was going to Hong Kong one day later. Now Wen Qiu almost didn't come up: "It's up to you."

"Then I'll send it to you now. I guess it will arrive tomorrow morning. You'll be flying to Hong Kong in the afternoon, so I can receive it just in time."

Wen Qiu said: "I want you to give it to me personally on my birthday."

Song Zongyan replied: "I want to too."

Words could not comfort Wen Qiu, the more he read such sweet words, the more he felt perfunctory.What's the use of saying something nice but not being able to do it.He hoped to see Song Zongyan on the winter solstice.

The group messages began to flicker, and some people were still talking about the gossip between Xia Yunjiao and Song Zongyan. Xia Yunjiao's attitude of not denying or admitting inside made Wen Qiu furious. He directly took a screenshot and threw it at Song Zongyan.

Song Zongyan replied with a series of ellipses for a long time.

Wen Qiu said straightly, "Is it okay for people to misunderstand like this?"

Song Zongyan replied after a while: "I will take the time to explain clearly to her."

"Can you reply quickly?" Wen Qiu looked at the time interval of the chat, "Reply every half an hour, I don't even have the desire to chat."

"Busy." Song Zongyan sent an emoji of touching his head.

"Then you can talk to me when you're not busy and can spare some time."

Maybe Song Zongyan was really busy, and he didn't return until lunch: "I'll take care of you whether you're busy or not."

Wen Qiu looked at these words and felt helpless.He didn't want to think wildly or seem preoccupied, but at this moment, it was as if his chest was blocked by a wet rag, and his brain started buzzing due to lack of oxygen: "I really don't know what you are busy with. I am also very busy, but every day This time, I will always respond to your messages as soon as possible, and squeeze out time to go to Beijing month after month.”

Song Zongyan probably didn't know how to reply. It showed that he was typing for more than a minute, and finally sent a sentence: "Thanks for your hard work."

Thanks for your hard work.It's fucking hard.But even after working so hard, why do you feel that the distance between each other is getting farther and farther?

"Next time, I won't reply to your message, and let you wait for half an hour for every chat, you can experience what it's like." Wen Qiu was angry.

"Well," Song Zongyan said, "OK."

good.good.Everything is good.He probably didn't even know that Wen Qiu was really angry.

Wen Qiu couldn't describe his mood, he was like a pump that was suddenly exploded: "Don't worry about everything, what's the matter? Do you know that I am angry now? Do you know how much I care about you going to Hong Kong later? Yes Am I eating too much of You Jingwen and Xia Yunjiao, or is someone jealous? You don't know anything."

Song Zongyan was a little panicked after receiving such a long paragraph: "I know, you are not happy."

"You don't know. Because you don't like me as much as I like you." Wen Qiu returned with a clang.

He was absolutely certain of this fact.

Song Zongyan dialed the phone immediately after reading this line, and said, "If you are angry, I apologize."

"I don't need your apology. Did you do something wrong? It's not wrong that you don't like me."

I don't like you. " Song Zongyan explained, "I don't know why you feel this way. "

"If you knew, I wouldn't feel that way." Wen Qiu replied harshly.

"Wen Qiu." Speaking was more straightforward than typing, and his emotions could not be concealed at all. Song Zongyan was obviously a little unhappy.He doesn't like other people to do this, but Wen Qiu is not someone else, so he still tried his best to appease the other person's emotions, "Don't think too much, okay?"

Wen Qiu's hand holding the phone trembled slightly, and he said after a while: "Not good. Song Zongyan, do you really care about this relationship?"

After he finished speaking, he hung up the phone.

Nine o'clock at night.A Yangxiezi hot pot restaurant in the east gate of the school was still full after dinner time, Song Zongyan came out to have dinner with others after class.

Xia Yunjiao took off her down jacket, only wearing a black lace dress, and she was adding hot vegetables from the hot pot: "Eating sheep and scorpions in snowy weather is really comfortable."

Song Zongyan turned on the phone and turned it off again, and replied, "Yes."

"What are you doing tonight?" Xia Yunjiao put the hot vegetables into the bowl, "I checked my phone several times in one night, and I got impatient with eating with me, want to go back?"

"No." Song Zongyan said.

"Then which girl is chasing you hard?" Xia Yunjiao looked at him teasingly.

"No." Song Zongyan's phone turned on several times a night, but it was not the message he wanted to receive, "I read the message sent in the group."

"What group?" Xia Yunjiao didn't understand right away.

Song Zongyan reported the name of the group, and Xia Yunjiao who was opposite suddenly sat up slightly, she smiled: "What's the matter? They usually like to make jokes inside, and you've seen it too, it's not good."

"Well, it is easy to cause misunderstanding."

"Then shall we make the misunderstanding come true?" Xia Yunjiao asked half teasingly and half tentatively, raising one eyebrow.

Song Zongyan was startled and said, "I'm sorry."

As soon as her eyes touched Song Zongyan, she knew it was bad, and the smile on her face disappeared instantly: "Are you in love?"

Song Zongyan nodded.

"Who? That girl from last time?"

"No, in that group."

Xia Yunjiao's face changed: "...a high school classmate I know? Shen Yu?"

Song Zongyan shook his head, afraid that she would continue guessing, when suddenly the phone rang, and he quickly opened it, but it was a message from a classmate.

He conveniently clicked on the top chat again. Song Zongyan sent several messages to Wen Qiu after the noon quarrel, but the other party seemed to be really angry and didn't reply to his message for the first time.

Xia Yunjiao has sharp eyes, squinting to see the screen of his mobile phone clearly, Wen Qiu's profile picture is a blue animal in animation, which is easy to identify.

"Wen Qiu?"

"Huh?" Song Zongyan turned off the phone, suddenly understood what she was guessing, froze for a moment, then nodded frankly.

Xia Yunjiao's complexion suddenly changed like an overturned paint box, as if swallowing a fly: "Is it really him?"

Song Zongyan frowned: "You know?"

Xia Yunjiao couldn't help but thumped the table lightly, and rarely uttered an obscenity, "Damn, are you crazy? You agreed to be with a man."

"You knew him a long time ago..." Song Zongyan pursed his lips and looked at her.

"Know what?" Xia Yunjiao looked at him through the steaming steam from the hot pot, "He secretly fell in love with you?"

Song Zongyan was speechless: "...when did it happen?"

Xia Yunjiao didn't want to tell him, but after calming down for a while, she still said, "A long time ago."

As early as the beginning of the second year of high school.You can't hide the look in your eyes when you like someone.What's more, girls are more sensitive to emotional matters, she is the first to see Wen Qiu's sexuality and who he likes.

"I thought he would never tell you in his life, and you would not agree to him." Xia Yunjiao tried her best to suppress her unhappiness, "You...are you crazy? He is crazy, and you are crazy too?"

"So you've known it since the second year of high school?" Song Zongyan asked.

Hearing from other people that Qiu likes him is another strange feeling. Song Zongyan can't express it, but there is an inexplicable emotion fermenting - joy, but distressed.

It turned out that Wen Qiu had liked him for so long.Others could see it, but he was kept in the dark, making Wen Qiu suffer for so long in vain.

Song Zong couldn't help but look at his phone again, but Wen Qiu still didn't reply.Only then did he realize that waiting was really not a good feeling.

Xia Yunjiao saw that the person on the other side was completely distracted, knowing who he was thinking about, she couldn't help but feel depressed, and the more she thought about it, the more angry she became: "You are really crazy Song Zongyan, do you know what it means to be gay? Don't just be moved because of a moment or it's not easy to refuse, but Bury yourself in the pit!"

There is a river near University A, which is neither long nor wide, and falling into it is as deep as drowning people. Although it was cold on the night of the winter solstice, there were still many students walking by the river.Zhang Fengyang looked at the girl next to him, Bai Shengsheng's legs, and said with sore teeth, "Aren't you cold?"

Chu Wenxin excitedly said: "The bare-leg artifact I bought this year works really well! Can't you see it?"

"Oh, the one with pants on." Zhang Fengyang realized it later and wanted to take a closer look.

Chu Wenxin jumped to the side and cursed, "Are you a hooligan!"

Zhang Fengyang thought she was making a fuss, and thought, would I be happy to eat your tofu: "Miss, you called me out so late to blow the air? It's almost time for access control."

"Isn't today the winter solstice? I suddenly remembered that I didn't eat dumplings, so I ordered a late-night snack. I was afraid of getting fat after eating, so I dragged you out to digest food." Chu Wenxin said.

Zhang Fengyang was about to scold her for nothing when the phone rang first.

The person on the phone was the unexpected Song Zongyan, who asked if he could contact Wen Qiu.There was an imperceptible eagerness in the voice, and Chu Wenxin, who was standing by the side, could hear it.

Zhang Fengyang was startled, said to wait a moment, and then signaled Chu Wenxin to contact Wen Qiu.

Chu Wenxin dialed Wen Qiu's phone suspiciously, but the phone was turned off.

She shook her head.

Zhang Fengyang said: "I can't get in touch, maybe the phone is out of battery, what's the matter?"

Song Zongyan didn't explain too much on the phone, and sighed slightly: "Are you at school? If it's convenient, I'll come and find you now."

After hanging up the phone, Zhang Fengyang held the phone and stared at Chu Wenxin in the cold wind.

Chu Wenxin raised her eyebrows and said, "What's going on?"

They sat and waited for someone at a milk tea shop near the school, and Song Zongyan appeared at the door of the shop wearing a scarf and carrying a schoolbag after a while.Zhang Fengyang stood up from his chair and waved: "Why are you back?"

Song Zongyan came back normally, but... Zhang Fengyang looked out the window, it was a freezing snow day.

He walked in with snow on the soles of his feet, his hair and shoulders were slightly wet, and he looked dusty. As soon as he walked in, he said, "I'm looking for Wen Qiu, do you know where his dormitory is?"

Zhang Fengyang and Chu Wenxin looked at each other.

Wen Qiu is not in the dormitory.The dormmate had already fallen asleep, and after being woken up, he said impatiently that Wen Qiu was not in the dormitory tonight, and he might have gone home.

The locals are good at this, and they go home when they want to go home.

Zhang Fengyang thanked him, and ran to the iron gate at the bottom of the dormitory, because Song Zongyan couldn't come in because of the gate control time, so he could only wait outside the gate.

Zhang Fengyang sent a message: "His roommate said that he really wanted to go home tonight. It's already so late. Wen Qiu may have fallen asleep. You..."

He wanted to ask you why you ran back to find Wen Qiu in the snow at night, but after a second thought, he felt that this matter was weird, so he looked at Song Zongyan twice more, and didn't continue.

"Thank you, go back and rest," Song Zongyan said politely, "I'll go to his house to see."

"Hey, hey." Zhang Fengyang didn't know what to say, so he could only watch him go out through the iron fence.

Chu Wenxin's gossip text message came in time: "What's going on? What's the situation?"

Zhang Fengyang rubbed his chin and clicked his tongue for a long time: "We seem to know a big gossip by accident."

The winter night is silent.The snow only fell for a while during the day, and the darkness stopped.Wen Qiu walked towards the elevator tiredly, with the smell of hospital disinfectant on his body, which made him sleepy.The phone was turned off early in the morning, and I had a quarrel with Song Zongyan—it didn't seem like a quarrel, but he lost his temper unilaterally and then turned off the phone.I don't know if Song Zongyan found him later.

He hesitated whether to turn it on, pressed his fingers aimlessly a few times, and the elevator went up one by one, and the elevator opened as soon as the phone screen lit up.

Wen Qiu's foot that was about to step out suddenly stopped, and in his vision, there was a person squatting at the door directly opposite the elevator.

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