hear you want to know

Happy lives are almost the same, but unhappy lives are unhappy in their own way.

When my father passed away, what my family lacked was not only a husband and a father, but also a pillar in our life.

First and foremost, the lack of money.

Life is that it may be possible to lack people, but it is impossible to lack money.

Therefore, I became the object of pity for everyone, and they showed love and mercy to me.

Relatives and friends launched the first round of rescue for our orphans and widows.

Father buried, suspect at large.

Teachers and classmates launched a second round of rescue for me personally.

Mother is frank, I am very passive.

Have you ever stood in front of the teachers and students of the school holding a donation box to seek donations for yourself?

That's not the same as holding a donation box to donate money to the disaster area.

I'm holding that, it's a pain in the ass.I wanted to throw it away, but the eyes of the whole school were on it, and they were still looking at it and crying.

I really... have no choice, I can only expose my pain and show it to everyone, so that their love can be balanced.

Look, that poor kid on the stage!

The dead can't live, and the living have to grit their teeth to live.

Father's first seven days are over, and our days will continue.

My father's death, in terms of the impact it had on me, didn't last that long.During the week when I was at home on personal leave, it happened to be in time for the composition competition in the city. The manuscript was prepared in advance. After my work was submitted, I won No.1.

On my first day back to school after bereavement leave, the list of big red news was posted on the campus bulletin board.

I was dressed in black and walked through the red bulletin board, the color was surprisingly eye-catching.

I won the honor this time without saying a word. Those who thought that I must have no intention of participating in the competition were disappointed, so they began to sneer.

See, people's love is also compared with charity.

When you are poor and desperate, their help to you may not be sincere.But when you turn around and stand up and no longer need sympathy, or when the situation is stronger than that of the person who gave you alms, their malice towards you is also from the heart.

One moment and another moment! From a human point of view, I can understand it.

But there is one person who can always subvert my cognition, and that person is my only friend——Liang Ye.

I expected that he would show me the same expressions of sympathy or disgust as everyone else, but he didn't.

Liang Ye still laughed and played with me as before, as if he didn't care about my heavy heart at that time.

He is so heartless, and I am so relaxed and comfortable.

Only he did not look at me with pity; only he did not pressure me with donations that showed "love"; only he told me with his actions that my life would not be different.

But thinking about it now, we were still too young at that time, because we hadn't lived a life and didn't know the true face of life, so we were so naive.

Naive enough to think that as long as we remain the same, the world will not change.

But in the end, I realized that the world has changed except us.

The first thing to change is the person closest to you.

My mother, she has changed.

She was no longer gentle and considerate, she began to be more serious about everything, she no longer let my study take its course, but began to insist on my grades.

I can understand her, or even if she doesn't do that, I will work harder than before. The life of orphans and widowers requires me to break out by myself.

However, in fact, human ability is limited.I don't have Einstein's brain, and my educational environment is not outstanding. Gradually, my grades began to bottleneck.

There is no need to compare the grades in the school, I am always the first, but if my grades are compared with the whole district, the whole city, and the whole province, it will not be so outstanding.

I don't need to stand out, and Tsinghua University and Peking University don't need me.

What else can I do besides studying hard!

My anxiety gradually increased, and my grades stalled.

Not being able to achieve self-breakthrough is an extremely painful thing.

Before I fell apart, Liang Ye reshaped me once again.

Maybe he didn't know, but a thought that came out of his mouth became the only motivation for me during that period of life.

He said, "Ozawa, let's take the Peking University exam together!"

I asked, "Why not Tsinghua University?"

Liang Ye said: "Because you, Ozawa, love literature!"

When he said this, it was just the end of a basketball game.He was sweating profusely standing beside me, holding the mineral water I gave him and pouring it on top of his head. He shook his head, and the cool water splashed on my face, but I didn't feel dirty at all.

The sun above my head was so big, but strangely, I didn't feel the burning sensation at all.

I know that the seedling in my heart has already received the rain, and it will soon break out of the ground and grow vigorously.

Why!But, I still haven't recognized the capriciousness of the word fate.

Once again, it tricked me.

In the winter vacation of the third year of high school, because it was the first Spring Festival after my father passed away, my mother and I went back to my grandmother's house for the New Year. They said that someone would accompany me to prevent my mother from thinking wildly.

I don't agree with this statement.

Pain that can be relieved by comfort is not real pain.

In this world, there is no such thing as empathy.

I don't need consolation, because it won't help me except to make me think about my sad things over and over again.

If I have free time, I might as well talk to Liang Ye on the phone.

The calls were all from Liang Ye, there was no reason, because international calls are very expensive.

Nothing unexpected happened this winter vacation, everything went smoothly.

Liang Ye's voice sounded very happy. He must have seen something interesting or his favorite football star, otherwise, foreigners' fast food would not make him so happy.

Liang Ye called every now and then, and I became a "left-behind child" who counted the days and waited for the call.

During the few days of Chinese New Year, he was in the UK with his parents.

The content of his call this time shocked me.

He said: "Ozawa, I don't plan to go back, I want to study in university in England, you... want to come?"

I felt like my ears were stuffed with cotton, and I couldn't hear clearly.

He repeated again, this time I had nowhere to hide.

Liang Ye said: "You can really think about it. Your grades are so good. After the college entrance examination, it will be no problem to apply to the school here! It will most likely be a full scholarship, and you don't have to worry about living expenses. Then I will help you!"

"But, didn't we agree to go to Peking University together?"

"..."

Liang Ye didn't answer for a long time, so long that I began to feel sorry for the phone bill.

After a sigh, he said: "I saw my parents this time, only to find that they are much older, and my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. She will receive long-term treatment in the United States. I want to be by their side as much as possible."

It is human nature, and his considerations make sense both emotionally and rationally.

He's not wrong, life is full of surprises that disrupt our plans.

What can be done?I only have him as a friend!

We agreed at the beginning that we will be brothers for a lifetime and will never be separated.

I don't know the weight of not separating these three words in his heart, but to me, it has a different meaning.

I thought about it and said, "I will mention it to my family, and try my best to fight for it. You wait for my news."

In fact, I am a very methodical person, I have a plan for doing things, and even plan every step of the way, and maybe I have a little obsessive-compulsive disorder.

I'm the kind of person who plans to drink water first before putting down the book, but if you ask me to put down the book first and then drink water, I will feel uncomfortable all over.

And Liang Ye can always challenge my bottom line, I have no way.

A few days before the end of the winter vacation, Liang Ye rushed back. In the remaining half a year, he had to devote himself to the IELTS test, but we all know that it was not difficult for him.

It is a foregone conclusion that he will go abroad.

Without his sudden decision, we would have been the most carefree high school seniors at that time, just waiting for graduation, waiting for the coming of the college entrance examination, and then entering the ideal university together.

However, fate always teases me one after another. It has already taken away one of the most important people in my life, and now the remaining one is far away from me.

And I can't do anything about it.

Liang Ye sneaked up to me and asked me: "How is it? Did you tell Auntie? Does she agree?"

He asked about my study abroad.

Looking at me silently, he didn't imagine that there would be resistance to things.

"Liang Ye, I may, may not be able to get out..."

God knows how I feel when I say this.

In fact, I already had a sore throat and my voice was hoarse.

"Does Auntie disagree? - If it's because of living expenses, I'll talk to Auntie and tell her not to worry at all, our whole family will help you!"

"Liang Ye, why did you choose to study in England?"

"For, for my mother, I tell you..."

"Yeah, you choose to leave for your mother, but I choose to stay for my mother's sake."

"But, but..."

Liang Ye couldn't find a reason to persuade me anymore, yes, we all forgot that I am no longer the person who does what I want, and neither is he.

"It's good to stay in China. With my grades, I don't want to go anywhere. Besides, she is the only one left in the family. I can't leave her behind."

I am enlightening Liang Ye, and I am also enlightening myself.

But in fact, I still have a lot of things I haven't said to Liang Ye, I can't say it, because it is too embarrassing!

Since her father passed away unexpectedly, her temperament has changed drastically. She no longer has compassion for others, but is hysterical every day.

She hated the person who killed her husband, she hated those in her husband's family who dragged down their lives, she hated me, hated that I had the same blood on my body as the Jiang family who indirectly killed her husband.

The murderer is at large, but she herself is like a trapped animal.

I can only take care of her more carefully, take care of her emotions and take care of her life.

Why, she is a poor person!

I have lost the qualification to live for myself, and from the moment my father passed away, my choice is no longer worthy of only including my own will.

I dreamed of studying literature and finally applied for economics and management. There is no reason, the real life after graduation is my starting point.

Liang Ye and I left that warm and humid city on the same day.

He goes to the airport and I go to the train station.

From that day on, our lives are destined to go in different directions.