My Feelings Can Wait

When Jing Xiu woke up, her eyes were blindingly white, and her head was so heavy that she was sick.She stared blankly at the lights on the ceiling, feeling a little dazed.Where is this?

"Teacher Jing, you're awake!" Yao Xiao's surprised voice sounded beside her ears.

Jing Xiu looked at Yao Xiao hesitantly, saw her worried eyes clearly, and the memory gradually came back.

"Mr. Jing, how does your head feel? You've had a lot of stitches..." Yao Xiao was worried.

Jing Xiu's eyes slowly became silent under Yao Xiao's words.Why don't you wake up from this terrible nightmare?Why... it wasn't a dream.

Yao Xiao saw that her eyes were terribly hollow, so she called out nervously: "Teacher Jing?"

Jing Xiu still didn't respond to her.She looked out the window, it was completely dark.

Yao Xiao was afraid that Jing Xiu was greatly stimulated and developed some post-traumatic syndrome, so she panicked and called the doctor: "Mr. Jing, don't scare me, doctor, I..."

"Call a car." Jing Xiu interrupted her, her voice was so hoarse that it seemed to be breathed out.

Yao Xiao heard her talking, breathed a sigh of relief, and tried to dissuade her: "The doctor said that you are too weak and need to rest more..."

"Call a car." Jing Xiu repeated stubbornly.

It's dark, it's late at night, how can she let Yanyan spend the night alone in such a cold place alone.

She sat up with her arms propped up, and Yao Xiao quickly went to help her.

Helping Jing Xiu up, she went to the end of the bed to shake it up.But as soon as she reached the end of the bed, she saw Jing Xiu raised her left hand from the corner of her eye, and tore off the tape on the indwelling needle tube of her right hand with a tear.

Yao Xiao turned pale in shock, and staggered back, "Mr. Jing! The water hasn't finished hanging yet..."

She pressed Jing Xiu's hands on the quilt, Jing Xiu couldn't struggle, her eyes were as cold as ice, "Yao, Xiao." Her voice was very soft, but it hit Yao Xiao's heart like a heavy weight.

Yao Xiao flinched: "May I call the nurse? Wait a minute..."

Jing Xiu was noncommittal, Yao Xiao took it as her consent.Who knew that just as she withdrew her hand and before she turned around, Jing Xiu pulled out the needle neatly.

In the next moment, blood beads rushed out, dripping down the back of Jing Xiu's hand.

Yao Xiao was at a loss, wanted to help her stop the bleeding but couldn't find a cotton swab, and was frantically ringing the bell to call the nurse, when the mobile phone beside the bed started buzzing.

Yao Xiao had no time to answer, Jing Xiu glanced down and saw that the caller ID was Wei Yizhen, her lips trembled, and she swiped the answer button.

"Is Jing Xiu awake?" She pressed the speaker, and Wei Yi's voice came through.

"Wake up." Jing Xiu replied her lifelessly.

The nurse came in, Yao Xiao asked the nurse for a cotton swab, and helped Jing Xiu press the needle port, Jing Xiu let her move, staring at the call interface of the phone out of focus.

Wei Yi was stunned for several seconds before realizing that it was Jing Xiu who answered the call, "Are you okay?"

Are you ok?The corners of Jing Xiu's lips reveal a sad look, can you still be okay?

She didn't answer Wei Yizhen, and informed her: "I'm going to reply to Yanyan right now, and you talk to the person in charge over there."

Wei Yizhen was suddenly nervous: "It's so late, Mr. Jing, you should rest first."

Jing Xiu pursed her lips and did not answer, her refusal attitude was obvious.

Wei Yi was really embarrassed.She took a deep breath and said with a heavy tone: "I'm on my way to your place now, wait for me, I have something to tell you."

"Can't we talk over there?" Jing Xiu didn't want to wait any longer.

"I can't." Wei Yizhen's voice was also tired.

Jing Xiu was silent.After a while, she seemed to have noticed something, and said inaudibly: "Okay."

Yao Xiao helped Jing Xiu stop the bleeding, and wiped the blood on the back of her hand with alcohol, only to find that Jing Xiu was too rude when pulling out the needle, and the needle made a long thin cut on the back of her hand.But Jing Xiu didn't care, she just looked at the void quietly, as if she was separated from everything around her into two worlds.

Until Wei Yizhen arrived with a feeling of desolation all over his body.

"Youyan's mother and relatives rushed over from Yanzhou to take care of the funeral, so I have no right to intervene in the things left behind by Youyan." Wei Yizhen sat down on the chair beside Jingxiu's bed, holding A transparent document bag.

It was obvious that the pain was numb, but when the words "funeral affairs" and "behind the scenes" repeatedly reminded her that Ji Yuyan was really gone pierced into her ears, Jing Xiu still felt a deep pain.It was the first time I heard about Yan Yan's family, but it was at a time like this...

"However, before her mother came, I cleaned up the scene. I think these things may be handed over to you." Wei Yizhen handed the file bag to Jing Xiu.

Jing Xiu was breathing more and more heavily, staring at the document bag in Wei Yizhen's hand like looking at a rare treasure.She raised her hand, her fingertips trembling.

She pinched the file bag, as if touching the last warm life of her beloved.She could no longer hold back the file bag against her chest, pressed it tightly with both hands, and burst into tears.

Wei Yi was really moved, feeling powerless all over his body.How can this be a show?If Zhong Qingyu and the others really saw Jing Xiu like this, would they still be able to say the sharp accusation that Jing Xiu was just hypocritical and affectionate?

"It contains the manuscript of the song written by Yu Yan, which may be written for you. Because...every one has your name written on the back. There is also a piece of jade, which was given to me by the forensic doctor. Yuyan held it in his hand at last."

Jing Xiu bit her lower lip tightly, her tears became more and more violent, but she didn't make a sound, the room was so silent that only her suppressed and rapid breathing could be heard.

After a long time, she loosened her arms, laid the file bag flat on her knees, and tried to open it.The opening was on the other side, but Jing Xiu groped repeatedly without noticing it.Wei Yi really couldn't stand it anymore and helped her turn it over, Jing Xiu's gaze inadvertently landed on that piece of white jade safety buckle.

Scenes of the past replayed in her mind like a revolving lantern. It was Ji Youyan's bright frown and smile during the journey, it was Ji Youyan's shyness and charm when she wanted her for the first time, it was Ji Youyan's bravery and gentleness protecting her under her body during the accident, it was ...

Suddenly, something flashed through Jing Xiu's mind, and she froze.She poured out the safety buckle and held it in her hand, like a drowning man grabbing the last straw.

"Words can still help!" Jing Xiu murmured, her eyes were full of hope, she couldn't wait to turn up the quilt and was about to get out of bed.

Wei Yizhen was shocked by her sudden words, and pressed her movements to question her: "What?"

Jing Xiu restrained his agitation, and explained to Wei Yizhen with a trembling voice: "Many years ago, Yan Yan and I rescued a master when we traveled in Tibet. We are one or two. He gave us this pair of jades, saying that we will have a life-and-death calamity in the future, and let us always carry them with us to prevent a calamity. But we don’t believe it. He will have a way, he is an expert, and he can predict it. As of today, he will definitely find a way.”

It seemed to be convincing Wei Yizhen, and also seemed to be convincing himself.

Too illusory, something out of the Arabian Nights.But Fan Jingxiu still has a little sense, so it is impossible for him to believe such nonsense.Wei Yizhen only thought that Jingxiu was over-stimulated and unwilling to accept the reality and imagined it.

She was still thinking about how to make Jing Xiu more rational, but Jing Xiu didn't give her time.

"Where's Xiaoxiao? Tell her to book a plane ticket right away..." She got off the bed on her limp legs, as if she was about to leave soon.

Wei Yizhen had no choice but to remind her: "Teacher Jing, the day after tomorrow is Yuyan's memorial service." She was afraid that Jing Xiu would not be able to come back in time, and she would miss the last side of this life.

Jing Xiu paused, her fingertips turned white with force on the table, and said in an unquestionable tone: "Postpone. Postpone the memorial service, let alone...not cremation..., wait until I come back."

This is unrealistic!Who does she think she is Ji Yoo-yeon now? !Wei Yizhen frowned, and flatly denied: "Impossible." She was afraid that her tone would be too cold and hard to hurt Jing Xiu, and explained: "The date is decided by Yuyan's mother, and the media's obituaries are also published. It's impossible for her to agree to change it." It's even more impossible to change it for such a ridiculous reason.

"I'll convince her." Jing Xiu said firmly.

"You can't convince her." Wei Yizhen said firmly.

"Take me to see her." Jing Xiu ignored it.

Wei Yizhen and Jing Xiu nicely analyzed the unreality of what she was thinking now, but Jing Xiu didn't seem to listen at all, and mechanically changed her clothes, only repeatedly emphasizing that she wanted to see Ji Yuyan's mother and postpone the funeral .

Wei Yi was really devastated, she tried her best.The tactful Jing Xiu didn't understand, so she could only say straight: "Mr. Jing, it's not that I don't want to take you there, it's that...you say her mother doesn't want to see you."

Jing Xiu finally lost all her movements as she wished.

After a long while, she lowered her eyelids, her voice was so astringent that it seemed to come out of her throat, "Auntie blamed me... for hurting Yanyan, right?"

It was her fault, and she blamed herself.

Wei Yi really wanted to deny it, but he couldn't deny it.Yes, Zhong Qingyu blamed Jing Xiu, and even hated her.

Wei Yizhen acquiesced, and said lightly: "Yuyan's mother knew that you came to mourn Yuyan today. She asked me to help her express her gratitude, and then...she...felt that it would be inconvenient for you to participate in the Bai It's better to rest and recuperate more. Don't worry about Yuyan's affairs. This is their own family business, and they will take care of it. After two days of the memorial service, you and other friends will come to send you off Just the last ride."

"Their own family affairs", "the same as other friends", the implication-she is an outsider, Jing Xiu could hear it very clearly.She bit her lower lip tightly, like a thin bamboo folded by the wind, stubborn and fragile.

After a long silence, she spoke again, with the same sentence: "Let me meet my aunt..."

Wei Yi couldn't bear it anymore, he looked at Jing Xiu as if he was looking at a paranoid lunatic, "Teacher Jing, please be sober! There is no medicine for regret in this world, so how could there be any medicine for resurrection. Death cannot be resurrected! All of us Just accept reality."

After shouting, she also shed tears.Everyone of them is sad, everyone is regretting, Jing Xiu is making such a fuss to poke someone's heart.

Jing Xiu looked at her, her straight back finally gradually bent down.

Wei Yi really thought that Jing Xiu had given up on that ridiculous fantasy, but Jing Xiu spoke again, with a hoarse voice: "Please..."

"Let me try. Can't you even try?"

It was a kind of humbleness that Wei Yizhen had never seen in Jing Xiu.

Wei Yi really couldn't tell what it was like, and if she refused, she felt that she was being unreasonable.

She compromised.There are some things she didn't want to say at first, but Jing Xiu's departure is likely to be self-defeating, and some things she must say first: "There is something that Yu Yan's mother asked me to convey together. If you listen to If you still want to see her, I'll take you there."

Jing Xiu looked at her intently, waiting for the next sentence.

"The people who came...not only Yuyan's mother and relatives, but also...youyan's..." Wei Yizhen felt like a cruel executioner, "My fiancé, we have been dating for many years."

Ji Yuyan's mother hopes to leave a clear name behind Ji Yuyan, so she hopes that Jing Xiu can hold her hand high and stop giving the media more room for imagination.Although Wei Yizhen knew that Ji Youyan loved Jing Xiu, but she didn't know about the marriage contract and had no time to investigate the specific ins and outs. As a survivor, Ji Youyan's mother and relatives all said yes, so it should be it.After all, this is Ji Youyan's family affair. As an outsider and middleman, no matter how she disagrees with Zhong Qingyu's treatment of Jing Xiu, she can only respect her wishes.

With the knife in his hand, Jing Xiu's pupils watching her suddenly enlarged, his expression changed several times, and finally became calm like stagnant water.

"It's okay. You take me to see Auntie." Jing Xiu's voice was soft.She clutched Jade hard, her palm was so painful that she couldn't bear to let go of any strength.

So, was it cheating from the start?For a moment, Jing Xiu wondered if he really knew Ji Yuyan, and did he really know Ji Yuyan?Ji Youyan, do you love her or not?She is like a mystery, always mysterious, always making her ups and downs in suspicion and anxiety.

But it's okay, really.She has long been used to it.

As long as she's still alive.

The author has something to say: I fixed the details.

Teacher Ji should be able to speak in the next chapter.

Ji·Backblade Man·Yuyan is preparing to cheat the corpse: woo woo woo, I wanted to sit up since the last chapter.