mean love

Trapped by a sudden rain, it must be difficult to call a taxi for a while.

Years ago, it seemed to be the same rain, and he was at the window, while Yan Nuo was downstairs.He saw Yan Nuo walking under a big black umbrella, Li Xiaoran was holding the umbrella, and the two of them were very close.

He fell in love with Yan Nuo at first sight.

Out of his sensitivity to the same kind, he almost quickly determined that Yan Nuo's sexual orientation was the same as his.Cheng Boyuan had several boyfriends and came out to his parents when he was in high school.

Cheng Boyuan has a cheerful personality and easily blends in with his surroundings. He claims to be good-looking, at least he has always been the one being chased; he is not a playboy emotionally, but he is not too enthusiastic either.

The breakup was all brought up by him, and the reason was nothing more than not being in love anymore.

It seems to be caused by inferiority. Men don't cherish things that are too easy to get.

When he reported for duty on the first day, he noticed that thin and quiet boy, who nodded to the people around him, squeezed out a polite smile, and sat there without saying a word.When it was his turn to introduce himself, he just stood up and said lightly, "My name is Yan Nuo, strict Yan, promised Nuo."

At the class dinner in the evening, Cheng Boyuan was stopped by the professor and went to the office to have a conversation. When he arrived at the restaurant, almost half of the people had already been seated.The dining table is a long table made up of several four-person tables. There are still a few vacancies near the door. A few buddies who came up together waved him over. Those classmates were sitting together talking and laughing, the rest came from all corners of the country and didn’t know each other. Today was the first day they met, and they were chatting in twos and threes, chatting about undergraduate schools or other topics.

Halfway through the barbecue, Cheng Boyuan has already been given a few glasses of wine. The professor just said that he will take him with him when he goes to Japan in two weeks.Cheng Boyuan's graduation tutor is this Professor Yang. Maybe it's his hard work or humility that left a little impression on the tutor, or maybe this trip to Japan simply needs a handyman. In short, he just got a graduate student An opportunity that may not be available for three years-accompanying the mentor on business trips.

Although it has not been officially announced, the conversation with the professor in the afternoon was overheard, which caused quite a stir among the group of freshmen. Nuo didn't seem to be interested in the topic here, and only focused on the barbecue on the dinner plate.

When Cheng Boyuan walked over with the wine glass, the girl sitting opposite Yan Nuo was complaining that the air conditioner was blowing on her too cold.Cheng Boyuan called the girl's name and asked with a smile if he wanted to change seats.

"The air conditioner isn't cold there, and it's quite empty. There are quite a few seats."

He has always had a good memory, and he memorized most of the names of the new students in one afternoon.

The girl blushed and thanked him, and moved over with the female classmate in the dormitory beside her.The dining table where Yan Nuo was sitting suddenly lost several people, probably because he felt Yan Nuo's alienation in character, the boy beside him turned his head to talk to the person on the other side, Yan Nuo at this moment was like an isolated island, drinking quietly alone, eat meat.

Cheng Boyuan sat across from Yan Nuo, Yan Nuo looked up at him, then lowered his head.The two of them were speechless for a while, and it seemed to be an extremely embarrassing scene to outsiders, Cheng Boyuan only felt a rare peace.

He was a little dizzy from drinking, and he was propping his head with one hand, and stuffing skewers into his mouth with the other hand, and looked at the opposite side from time to time, no matter how he looked, he thought the person opposite was pleasing to the eye.

It seems that if you don't say anything, you don't do anything, just sitting here makes your heart beat faster.

At that time, he didn't think too much about love or this potential pursuit. He only felt that the future would be bright. His self-confidence since he was a child or the alcohol that night had dazzled him. Cheng Boyuan had a premonition that the boy opposite him would one day will be his.

This time he wants to be more cautious, he is already tired of the relationship that ends without a cause, he wants to feel a little more hormonal throbbing before confirming the relationship, to be sure that this person is right.

Two months later, he saw Yan Nuo under Li Xiaoran's umbrella by the glass window of the dormitory, and for the first time in his life, Cheng Boyuan was extremely sure of the feeling of being right in the heart.

It was shock, it was jealousy, it was regret, it was heartache.

After going through this scene, all the unclear feelings in my heart are absolutely incomparable at this moment.

The two people under the umbrella walked further and further apart, just like eight years later, Cheng Boyuan could only watch Yan Nuo stuff the suitcase into the trunk of the taxi, and the car disappeared quickly in the rain, and the heavy rain washed away all traces.

It is always said that time will forget everything, but the mood of eight years ago is still vivid in my memory.

After being suddenly sad eight years ago, he chose to approach, deceive, and induce Yan Nuo with a smiling mask. He got close to Yan Nuo little by little, separated him and Li Xiaoran, and finally hugged this person in his arms and wedged him into his body.

Cheng Boyuan never really felt that he was wrong. Objectively, he knew it was a wrong behavior. Subjectively, he believed that everyone was selfish.

But eight years later, he couldn't do it.

It's not because of any changes in Cheng Boyuan's three views, nor is it because he doesn't want to spend as much time as he did in the past.

He just couldn't tell a lie anymore.

Thinking of Yan Nuo's tears, his heart ached. He couldn't bear Yan Nuo to cry, he couldn't bear Yan Nuo to suffer. He even suspected that if Yan Nuo begged him for a divorce, he could only nod in agreement.

Just because he loves him, he loves him.

Except for the initial period, Cheng Boyuan never told a lie.Every word he said at the wedding was true:

I will love you, respect you, accompany you, protect you until the last second of my life.

"Ahh-!"

Yan Nuo turned his head and sneezed. He sniffed. It was only the beginning of October, and the temperature here had already dropped below ten degrees. When I got off the plane, I was blown by the wind in the north and my head hurt.

Coupled with jet lag, he hasn't slept well in the past few days, so he has to rely on strong coffee every morning to refresh himself.After finally surviving the three-day meeting, I thought I could sleep well in the hotel on the weekend, but I didn’t expect to be dragged by my female colleagues to go to the local outskirts outlet in the morning.

The other two women in the car were discussing which brand is cheaper to buy at the outlets in the suburbs of the destination city. He looked out of the window with nothing to love, and there was a maple forest in the distance. There is a maple leaf forest, and in the vast distance are distant clouds and boundless crimson.

Yan Nuo took out her mobile phone and used the camera to freeze this moment.

Falling into the beautiful scenery, many entanglements and unhappiness will temporarily dissipate. He posted a circle of friends without any text, but only added a location.

Although he blocked that person, he still revealed his whereabouts with a little care.

During the quarrel on the eve of parting, he did not argue that this trip had nothing to do with Li Xiaoran at all, and Li Xiaoran already had a same-sex partner in country A, and he and Li Xiaoran had not crossed the line at all in the past half month—Yan Nuo felt that there was no need to make a special trip. to explain.There is a definition of "presumption of innocence" in the law, and falsification is always harder than proof. When Cheng Boyuan began to doubt him, all excuses were in vain.

The two are still in a stalemate, but now, Yan Nuo misses Cheng Bo far away.

Just because he once said that he wanted the two of them to go to country C to see the gorgeous red leaves together.

The longing [-] kilometers away is just a blurred photo taken while moving, silently hiding in a corner of the circle of friends.

When they arrived at the outlet, they separated. Yan Nuo first found a men's clothing store at random and bought a white down jacket to wrap himself up in. He didn't quite understand the brand. RMB [-], this fleece is very warm to the touch, and it should not be cold in the next few days.

After completing his self-rescue, he didn’t have any shopping tasks. He just paced slowly in the park. The passers-by were all anxious. There were many Chinese with big and small bags. It seemed that he was racing against time. The more you buy here, the better the deal. like.

Coming out of L'Occitane, Yan Nuo was holding a gift for Cheng Boyuan's mother. Every time he went abroad, he would bring something for Cheng Boyuan's mother, health care products or cosmetics. People of that generation always have a concept that foreign things are always better than domestic ones. Cheap and good, Yan Nuo is also happy to buy something for Cheng's mother.

He has always been very grateful for the open-minded attitude of Cheng's parents and mother when he married Cheng Boyuan. That day Cheng Boyuan took him home. He was so nervous that he couldn't even pick up the food. Cheng's mother poured him a glass of wine. I drank a cup and asked him only one sentence:

"Xiao Yan, have you made up your mind that you want to spend the rest of your life with Xiao Yuan?"

At that time, he nodded emphatically and said yes, the rim of his glass dropped an inch when the wine glasses collided.Yan Nuo drank all the wine in the glass, the strong wine burned his throat, but he tasted sweetness.

Passing by a men's shoe store, Yan Nuo went in and took a look around. The discounted price was indeed cheaper than domestic ones. He picked out a pair of dark brown Oxford shoes and a pair of black Derby shoes, both with brogue patterns, which Cheng Boyuan liked. shape.

The shopping guides were all busy on the other side, Yan Nuo hesitated for a while, and then put the shoes back on his hands.

He remembered Cheng Boyuan's aggressive and hurtful words that night, turned around and left the shop.

After drinking coffee in the coffee shop, Yan Nuo caught a glimpse of a store not far away that was crowded with people, so he couldn't help but go over to take a look curiously.

It is a specialty store of Canada Goose. Yan Nuo visited this store with Cheng Boyuan in China. A down jacket sold for more than 8000. At that time, Cheng Boyuan excitedly wanted to buy one for Yan Nuo, but he sternly refused.

Just about to go in and take a look, a phone call came.

"Hello. I'm, uh, what? How did I fail to issue a ticket?"

It's the phone number of the domestic air ticket agent, it seems to be them