[Net King] Take away my heart

on the path of awakening

on the stretched avenue

in the boiling square

i write your name

— Paule Luard

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After getting permission from the doctor, Jiayin and I finally had the chance to be discharged from the hospital for a day.

It was our 15th birthday and our first time out alone together, so it was definitely a day to look forward to.But maybe it was because I was expecting too much, since I haven't been out of the ward for a long time, I don't know where to take Jiayin next.

Jiayin and I don't seem to know much about what is popular among students nowadays, and we don't care much.As for the karaoke, bowling alley, and game center that Marui and the others used to go to, they don't seem to be suitable for us.

"Where should I go?"

After leaving the hospital, Jiayin and I walked aimlessly on the street.We walked slowly because no destination had been decided in advance.

"...anywhere." Jiayin replied, I seemed to expect her to answer like this.

"If you say that, I don't know what to do." I smiled wryly.

"Grandma said that girls who are too assertive will be annoying."

"Oh? Did grandma say that?" I found it amused, "But no matter what, it's impossible for me to hate Jiayin."

Jiayin didn't say a word, as she was used to, she lowered her head slightly again.I don't know if it's because it's the first time she went out alone with me, she seemed a little uncomfortable.Although I walked very slowly, Jiayin still did not walk with me, she always kept a distance of one or two steps away from me, and silently followed me obliquely behind.

It's been a long time since I've breathed such fresh air, and it's been a long time since I've walked the streets and among the crowds so easily.Even though a doctor-approved day off is really nothing more than a few hours from morning to night, I want to enjoy the day as much as possible and enjoy the feeling of getting back to normal life.

We walked for a long time without knowing it. Although we passed many shops on the way, Jiayin and I didn't intend to stop and go in for a rest.Just walking like this, time seems to have passed most of the time, and we haven't really done anything like come out to play.

"Sorry, I haven't been out for a long time, I've been running around with you, are you tired?"

Jiayin, who was following me, didn't make a sound, but just shook his head.I know that even if she is really tired, she won't say it out. Although I try to suppress it, I feel a little distressed by her trembling appearance.

"If you're tired, just go back to the hospital." I tried to joke, "Does your foot hurt? Put it on your back, and I'll carry you back."

I made a move to carry her on my back, and Jiayin looked at me in surprise.

"Hey, it hurts to be looked at by you with that kind of eyes... Just kidding, if I fainted halfway, I have to trouble Jiayin to call an ambulance to take me back."

I tried my best to make her smile, but Jiayin still couldn't let go, but her expression was a little more relaxed than before.

"I'm not tired," she said softly.

Jiayin was wearing an old light gray hoodie with very plain jeans underneath, it didn't look like she had deliberately prepared for a trip.The hoodie looked baggy on her, as if it were a size too big.In fact, the dress used to fit, but Jiayin was much thinner than before, which started almost at the same time as my admission to the hospital.

Jiayin has lost weight, so standing next to me looks even smaller than before.This made me feel pity, but also very uncomfortable.

"Jiayin looks so small." I smiled and said to her, "It's because you always walk behind, always two or three steps away from me...but it seems very deliberate, doesn't it? Jiayin is not my shadow , why not walk side by side."

If possible, I really want to hold hands, chat and laugh like the couples you can see everywhere on the street, and even share the same ice cream.But I know it can't be done, and I don't try to.Well, I hope at least we don't look weird, and don't make people think that we are two completely unrelated people walking in tandem.

I didn't pull Jiayin to the same position as myself, I just said that and moved on.Jiayin hesitated for a moment, but quickly followed. There was still a little distance at first, but as we walked, our pace gradually became consistent.

Later, Jiayin and I decided to go to a movie.Unaware of current popular news, we stood blankly at the ticket office for a while, and finally, at my suggestion, we chose a ghost movie that almost no one bought tickets.

"I've never seen this type of movie... It's good to experience it once in a while."

Jiayin seemed to be puzzled by this choice, but since she had already bought a ticket, she could only obediently follow in.I've never been a big fan of ghosts and ghosts, especially knowing it's just a movie.But Jiayin is different, she held my arm almost the whole time during the movie screening, once there was a scary scene, she tensed up all over, I almost laughed because of her excessive nervousness, but I held back up.

Because, that's why I'm going to choose this movie.Choose success.

When I walked out of the cinema, Jiayin's face was still ugly, which made me unable to stop playing tricks on her.

"The next time you watch a movie, you should choose this type, isn't it interesting, isn't it unexpected? At the end..."

"Don't, stop talking!" Jiayin interrupted me, she was sweating a little, it seemed to be a cold sweat, "It's not interesting at all..."

I've never seen Jiayin break out in a cold sweat from being frightened, and seeing such a cute side makes me feel very satisfied.Maybe, though, it's gone a little too far.

"It's okay, it's just a movie, of course it's all fake...but it doesn't matter if it's true, I'm here, right? I'll protect you." I stretched out my fingers and wiped the sweat from Jiayin's nose , "After all, being held by your arm is still very fulfilling."

Jiayin looked at me in surprise again, and then her pale face began to recover, with a faint rosiness.At this point, she would jerk her head away again.

"Since it's a birthday, why don't you do something like a birthday...to eat cake?"

So, the next stop of the cinema, we went to the pastry house.

Today's special offer billboard at the entrance of the pastry shop reads a big "Half price for couple's discount package", which is really hard not to notice.I stared at the promotional information and menu for a while, and Jiayin on the side immediately flinched.

"Don't worry, we don't look alike, no one will recognize us." I said to Jiayin.

"I'm not worried about this..." She whispered, and her eyes quickly moved away from the "half price for the couple's discount package", as if it was something to avoid.

The west point room is almost full, and without exception, it is occupied by a couple of young couples.Dessert seems to have a fatal appeal to young people, I don't know if Jiayin is the same.

The waiter brought us a [-]% discounted "Couple Package", luckily we didn't get caught as a couple in the first place.Surrounded by a thick sweet atmosphere, Jiayin seemed to have fallen into a complete daze. She stared at the heart-shaped cake in front of her with only one tableware in a daze.

Since it is a couple's course, it seems to be taken for granted that it is made like this.The couple at the next table are already eating while you feed me and I feed you. This kind of nasty scene didn’t just happen at that table, but almost the whole pastry shop. I broke out in a cold sweat, and my symptoms seemed to be worse than when I watched a movie.

"You can eat." I pushed the cake and tableware to Jiayin who was staring at the cake in a daze, "I'm not hungry."

Jiayin shook her head.

"It will be suspected." She glanced at the next table nervously, "No one eats alone..."

"If you are found out, at worst, you can pay the full amount." I smiled, "Or...do you want to feed me?"

She shook her head again.Then push the cake and cutlery all back in front of me.

"You eat," she said.

I had no choice but to pick up the table knife and cut the cake into small pieces, then poked one piece with a fork and passed it to the opposite side.The couple at the next table seemed to do just that.

"Come on, open your mouth." I said to Jiayin.

She stared at me like petrified, her tightly pressed lips didn't seem to open at all.I knew it would be like this, so I added: "Just take it as a thank-you gift for wiping my back last time... Please, open your mouth."

I can't guarantee that such a deadlocked posture will attract the attention of others.Just before I felt sore arms, Jiayin closed her eyes and swallowed the cake I handed over as if she had made a huge determination, and swallowed it immediately without chewing much.

She looked like she had committed some heinous crime, or thought I was handing him poison instead of cake.

I finally couldn't help laughing out loud.Jiayin sat there in embarrassment and embarrassment, as if entering this pastry shop meant that she would come here to go to jail.As a result, I didn't eat a bite of the cake, and I fed it all to Jiayin in this embarrassing way.She was always restless, obviously eating cake was such a happy thing, but to her it was like being tortured.

After eating the cake, Jiayin rushed out of the pastry shop without saying a word. I have never seen her run so fast.She ran outside the West Point house and took a long breath, and then she seemed to be alive again.

"How are you, are you still sweating?"

I wanted to reach out and brush her hair to see if she was still sweating on her forehead, but Jiayin avoided it immediately.

"No," she said, "I'm hot, and I'm going to get a hair dryer."

Her face seemed to be very red.

We came to a park near West Point House and sat by the fountain for ten minutes.Because of the open space, the park is much colder than indoors, which is probably just suitable for those who want to enjoy some good news.

"It's a bit cold." After a while, I said.

My stomach seemed to be silently protesting that I hadn't eaten anything at the pastry shop.Normally, there would be no problem even if I didn’t eat for a whole day, but after all, I’m still a patient on temporary leave, and at this moment, I seem to be helplessly unable to do what I want.

After hearing what I said casually, Jiayin immediately began to take off her coat.I was taken aback, and quickly stopped her: "Ah, no need, just talking casually..."

Jiayin still insisted on taking off her hoodie for me.

"Don't take it off, please." I could only smile helplessly, "Really, why did you say that, it's too embarrassing...Obviously I'm a boy."

If the words were uttered by Jiayin instead of me, I could have taken off my coat and handed it to her in a cool way. Such a reversed scene is really embarrassing.

Not only embarrassing, but bitter.As a boy, I should protect Good News, but sometimes I have to be protected by her as a girl.

In a blink of an eye, the sun has started to set, and there is not much left for a day of vacation.Looking at the sparsely populated people around the park, I couldn't help thinking.

"Gifts..." Seeming to have noticed something, Jiayin suddenly said, "We haven't sent birthday presents yet."

"Ah, yes." I sighed and said, "Sorry, I couldn't get any decent presents at the hospital, so I didn't prepare."

"Me too..." She lowered her head.

In our family, which has been battling illness and financial constraints, no one really has the energy to buy presents or plan how to celebrate a birthday at a time like this, and just worrying about me is exhausting.But more importantly, I failed to receive a gift from Jiayin on my birthday last year. It was an unpleasant memory, and I still don’t want to mention it even now.

"Well... yes." I looked at the people around me and thought of an idea, "As a birthday present, no matter what the people over there do, I will imitate it for you."

"Imitation?" Jiayin didn't quite understand what I said.

"Generally speaking, I don't do this kind of thing..." I stood up, and although I was a little embarrassed, I still pointed my finger at a person who was doing landscape sketching, "Look, I'll imitate him."

A man who was painting not far away was dragging a paint tray in his hand, so I also pretended to raise my hand and scribbled in the air.The man bent down from time to time to get paint from the paint pot on the ground, and I also bent down with him and fiddled a few times into the paint pot that didn't exist at all.

Jiayin squinted at me.

"It's not difficult...I can do it too," she said.

"Okay, then change to a difficult one." I said.Then I saw a teenager with a tape recorder ready to dance here.

It's not just difficult.I have never danced hip-hop, so I can only follow that boy from a distance, swinging his arms and kicking his legs.In order to make the dance not too ugly, I reduced the range of movements. As a result, I looked like an old man doing strange aerobics on the side of the road, twisting my neck and shaking my legs.

Jiayin finally found it funny, she lowered her head first, and then I realized that she was doing it to hide her laughter.

"Are you satisfied? This is already my limit." After doing a strange gymnastics, I stopped and said, "It's up to you to give me a present."

"Then... let me imitate it too." Said Jiayin also stood up.

I was a little surprised.

"You want to imitate? That's tricky... stealing my gift idea like this." I said with a smile.

Jiayin looked left and right.

"Imitate the people over there."

On the other side of the fountain stood two girls who seemed to be older than us, probably high school students.Two people were arguing about something, their faces were red, and they were yelling at each other.

"Those are two people, how do you imitate them?" I asked Jiayin.

"Please do me a favor." She walked towards me, and stomped angrily like the girl on the other side, "Just let us imitate together."

I've never imitated a girl in my life, so it was really funny.I don't know that Jiayin can let go of restraint. She imitated those two girls, waving her arms and stomping her feet fiercely. She also imitated one of the girls and messed up her hair like an angry Cursing like a crazy idiot.

Soon we couldn't learn anymore, because we were laughing at each other most of the time.The girls on the other side have already upgraded to the stage of fighting. One girl stepped forward and pulled the other girl's hair. The girl pushed her away, and then rushed up to beat her with his fist. Repeating all this has turned into a farce.

"You fool, fool, heartless! . . . er . . . "

We had a great time at first, but we didn't know when the two girls would stop.But on the way to imitate their fights, a picture suddenly appeared in front of my eyes that made me and Jiayin freeze for a moment-two girls hugged each other, and they suddenly kissed.

In this way, the actions of Jiayin and I were frozen at the moment before they kissed.At this moment, Jiayin was still pretending to hit me with her fist. It was obviously a quarrel between girls, how could it suddenly turn into such an incredible scene? ——Jiayin and I were extremely surprised by this sudden scene.

Jiayin lowered her fist and smiled awkwardly at me.I also retracted my movements and smiled awkwardly at her.There is no more embarrassing moment than this moment, because we will never continue to imitate the behavior of those two girls.We could only smile awkwardly at each other.

After a fight, the originally cold body has warmed up, and the originally beautiful sunset has also turned into a heavy night.

"Happy birthday." I said to Jiayin.

"Happy birthday," she replied.

She turned back to the taciturn good news, and I turned back to Yukimura who should be lying on the hospital bed.We all realized that the short vacation ended after that embarrassing scene.

We walked together on the way home, to be precise, on the way back to the hospital.I could have gone back to the hospital by myself, but Jiayin said she had to send me back.Just like when she was about to take off her coat for me to wear, Jiayin became my protector again.But now I don't want to say no to her, because it would be nice to be with her a little longer.

I remember the closest way back to the hospital, but we didn't take that way.Jiayin and I were walking on a street that seemed to take a detour, and she didn't ask any questions. I thought Jiayin might not remember the nearest way, or maybe, like me, she would like to take a detour back.

We walked through an unfamiliar street. The street was bustling with dazzling neon lights on the left and right. Most of the people walking on the road were drunk middle-aged office workers and women in strange costumes handing out leaflets.

I probably realized that this is a street that shouldn't be passed by at night. From time to time, there are strange eyes on me and Jiayin from the side of the road.Thinking that it would be fine as long as we turned a blind eye, Jiayin and I continued walking until we came to a place where there were love hotels everywhere.

"...It seems that I accidentally walked to a strange place."

I stopped and said to Good News.

She looked up at the dazzling neon lights in front of her eyes, and the flashes of neon lights were reflected in her pupils.She remained in this position for a long time without speaking.

"It's late, let's go home." I said.

I can't say that I clearly know what is going on in Jiayin's mind, but I know that we are also thinking about a problem.This question silences us, and it can only silence everyone.

A day off is over, like all good times come to an end. We who are 15 years old will return to our own reality, and the next 15 years old may never come again.

"When it's next birthday... let's go to the countryside to see grandma. Every time I have a birthday, grandma is not around."

"okay."

In this way, Jiayin and I left the place that does not belong to us.Leaving that night that was not ours.