The Best Fake Eunuch

"Damn slave! Three glasses of wine are fined, who made us laugh so hard!" Liu Ruyun said involuntarily, grabbing Xiao Chen's ear and forcing him to drink three glasses of wine.

"This slave really deserves to be punished..." Li Wanjiang wiped away tears from laughter, and pointed at Duanmu Nanqiao, "Your concubine, please tell me one too."

"My sister can't, and I can't, I'd better ask Xiao Chen to do it for me." Duanmu Nanqiao stood up and poured a glass of wine for Xiao Chen himself, "Please trouble me."

"It doesn't make sense, the emperor and empresses, you don't know the rewards and punishments. If the joke is not funny, you will be punished with alcohol, and if it is funny, you will be fined?" Xiao Chen looked helpless with a bitter face.

"Stop talking nonsense, talk quickly!" Liu Ruyun laughed.

"Hey!" Xiao Chen thought for a while, "This is a matter of the previous court. The chief eunuch named Liu Haishan was in the hands of the chief inspector of ceremonies. He was originally a brave general in the Han army, and he was very brave. He was good at fighting, and was seriously injured in a fierce battle, and the work below was cut off by a knife..."

"The former emperor took pity on him, so he was transferred to his side, and he was appointed as the chief eunuch in charge of rites and seals. It can be said that he is very honorable."

"He himself didn't really care about it. After all, it was worth it to exchange that job for a big eunuch with palm prints. It's just that he couldn't have intercourse. But his wife was very sad, crying and complaining endlessly about him every night... ..."

"He explained earnestly to his wife that although he suffered an accident, he has become such a big official after all. You are a third-rank wife. What's so sad? But his wife still kept crying, saying that she didn't care about it. He is a high-ranking official, I only hope he has a dick..."

"He couldn't help being angry, and he jumped up against the case, cursing loudly, you are really a woman's opinion! If you want to say it like this, don't I, the eunuch with the handprint of the chief of ceremonies, even Not as good as an egg?"

After the big guys heard this, they roared with laughter. Everyone knew that Gong Shouli didn't have a dick, and Xiao Chen was a very hateful guy.

It was short of saying that Gong Shouli was not even as good as an egg.

The angry Gong Shouli disregarded the impoliteness of the king, and the one who rolled up his arms and sleeves wanted to be right with Xiao Chen!

"Shouli, isn't this just a joke? Why are you so angry? I favor you, and let you talk about Xiao Chen back and forth." Li Wanjiang laughed.

But Gong Shouli didn't have Xiao Chen's ability, and couldn't speak out even with his blushing face, so he stomped his feet fiercely, "The slave is not as vulgar as his boy!"

"Let's talk about it from my concubine." Liu Ruyun said with a smile.

With wonderful eyes, seeing that Xiao Chen was the only one wearing a square scarf among the crowd, he also had a story in his heart.

"A monk was peeing on the side of the road, shaking after peeing. At this time, a student wearing a scarf passed by..." Liu Ruyun said and glanced at Xiao Chen.

The big guys also looked at Xiao Chen together, and when they saw the scarf on his head, they all smiled knowingly, and said in their hearts that it's your turn to be unlucky this time.

"The student wearing the scarf has a witty personality and likes to make jokes. He would tease the monk and say, 'You two, master and apprentice, what are you talking about here?'"

Everyone couldn't help laughing when they heard this, and they really sounded like Xiao Chen's tone when they said this.

But Liu Ruyun continued, "The monk turned his head and glanced at the student, still shaking his work, and replied flatly, 'The poor monk is looking at how big his head is, so I want to fold a square scarf and wear it with him.' "

Hahaha! The crowd burst into laughter again.

Murong Danqiu blushed when she laughed, and even said that Liu Ruyun's hoof is really damned!

Is this what a noble concubine of you should say?

"Oh, I can't remember how long it's been since I smiled so happily." Li Wanjiang smiled with ease, and Longyan was so happy.

"It's the concubine's turn to say something, but the emperor first forgives the concubine's innocence." Not to be outdone, Concubine Liang also offered to make the big guy laugh.

"Not guilty and not guilty." Li Wanjiang was very happy.

"The concubine is talking about the previous court. There was an official who was afraid of his wife and was always beaten. He dared not speak out. One day when the Lion Roared in the River East, his wife became so aggressive that she killed his wife. The gauze cap is broken!"

"He was really angry, and ran directly to the palace to complain to the emperor, and said: "Your Majesty Chen Qi, and my wife Luo Zao, fought yesterday and broke the black hat of the minister. Please the emperor issue an order to punish her!" '"

"The emperor heard that he was silent for a long time before he said slowly: "Aiqing, you have to bear it. You don't know about Aiqing, and the queen is also a little tired. I didn't agree with you last night, and I will put my world on balance." The crown was smashed to pieces... Aiqing, your gauze hat is nothing more than a bag of eggs compared to Zhenping Tianguan!"

"Hahaha!" Li Wanjiang laughed tremblingly, pointing at Concubine Liang Gui, "My dear concubine, it's fine if you make fun of me, why do you even bring the queen along?"

Murong Danqiu was angry and funny, and said angrily, "Give me this little hoof, let her talk nonsense!"

The monarch and his subjects had a great time that night, only Gong Shouli was alone, pouted and unhappy.

On the way back from the car, I naturally wanted to say a few bad things about Xiao Chen, "Xiao Chen is so rude in front of the emperor and the empress and noble concubines, it shows how he behaves in private, the servants see him as a monster, If it is not removed, sooner or later the harem will be polluted!"

"He is a eunuch, how can he mess up the harem? Besides, this is a trivial matter..." Li Wanjiang's reason for wanting to kill Xiao Chen is not that simple.

According to Chen Wenqi, Minister of the User Department, Xiao Chen is a man of great power and profound wisdom, but he is by no means as simple as he appears on the surface.

Although he is shrewd and capable, he can't understand the emperor's thoughts, that's all, but I'm afraid that he knows the emperor's thoughts, but will deliberately push the emperor to do things.

It would be fine if he was just an ordinary little eunuch, but now his power in the palace is getting bigger and bigger, and he has even faintly surpassed the Chief of Rites and Jin Yiwei!

This is not appropriate.

The palace only needs a foolish and loyal person like Gong Shouli, but it doesn't need someone as shrewd as Xiao Chen.

Otherwise, if he has any other intentions, some unbearable things may happen...

It must be guarded against.

Let him go outside? It's not impossible, but people like him are actually not very easy to control.

It is said that with a little trick, he can overwhelm the city and the country... Your Majesty, you have seen the affairs of Siam and Myanmar, right?

What if he makes a few more great 'contributions' outside, what should we do with him?

Not only did Chen Wenqi mean this, but several other confidant ministers also expressed similar meanings. Although they didn't say it clearly, the meaning was that it was best to get rid of him, and it would be over once and for all.

It was exactly what Li Wanjiang wanted.

Now he just needs to find a correct way to get rid of Xiao Chen.

Obviously killing him is definitely not an option, and assassination is even more inappropriate, so he can only let him die, and he will die clearly.

It's just that when the matter came to an end, Li Wanjiang hesitated slightly.

Although this kid deserves to be damned, he's also really fucking smart and capable, smart and lovable, and considerate.

It's a pity to kill him.