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Chapter 341 I am not targeting anyone, I just want to say
The next day.

Tang Emperor's imperial edict, a banquet for all the ministers.

Of course, the most important thing is that Tang Sanzan who solved his daughter's illness and helped him clean up the dragon soul that had been entangled with him for more than half a month.

At the beginning of the banquet, the Emperor Tang opened his golden mouth, and conferred the imperial title of Sanbu Tang's Holy Monk and younger brother of the Holy Emperor.

At the beginning, Tang Sanzan was very happy to accept the shameful title of holy monk. The only thing he felt criticized was the holy emperor's younger brother, which made him feel that he was taken advantage of by Li Er.

Why is Yudi not Yuxiong?Why do you have to be older than the poor monk?

However, just when Tang Sanzan was about to refuse, a flash of inspiration flashed in his mind, which made Tang Sanzan happily accept the title of Yudi.

As for the reason.
Hey hey hey!Hey hey hey!
Brother Yu, Jade Emperor!
Although it's just a mouthful and the ears are hidden, but after all, it reads the same, okay?

Think about it, in the future, when any annoying little goblin is acting like a baby with her, she will take a mouthful of 'Brother Jade Emperor', it will not only be crisp to the bone, but also cool to the bone!

I used to envy the title of the Monkey King Equaling Heaven, but now that my younger brother (Jade Emperor) comes out, it seems that he is not much worse than the monkey, right?
Seeing that Tang Sanzan accepted his gift with pleasure, Li Er was very satisfied.

Pulling Tang Sanzan's hand into the table, let Tang Sanzan sit next to him, in the same row as himself, with civil and military officials sitting on the left and right below, each with a low table, and the banquet was placed on the table by the maids from time to time.

For a while, it can be said that the host and guest enjoyed themselves.

Well, if you don't look at Tang Sanzan's disgusted and entangled expression when he was held by Li Er, the word guest and host enjoying themselves should still be very appropriate.

As for Tang Sanzan's disgusted look, His Majesty Li Er selectively ignored it.

To put it bluntly, I am the emperor of the Tang Dynasty. In the whole world, who would not regard it as an honor to be held by me to show my favor, and how could they despise it.

So, illusion!All this is an illusion!
Reassuring himself in his heart, Li Er picked up his wine glass and drank it down in one gulp.

Putting down his wine glass and watching the song and dance performance below, Li Er felt complacent for a while.

In today's world, the world is peaceful, and the people live and work in peace and contentment.

The only two troubles that bothered him, his daughter's illness, and the cicada's ghost, were all solved by Tang Sanzan. At this moment, Li Er was very comfortable.

Under the comfort, even the Hu Xuanwu, which was not too new after watching it countless times on weekdays, became beautiful and moving in Li Er's eyes.

At the point of pride, Li Er couldn't help turning his head, took Tang Sanzan's hand and asked, "Brother Yu, do you think this song and dance is satisfactory?"

This time, Tang Sanbu didn't give Tang Huang Majesty any more face, and directly pulled his hand out of Li's second hand with a look of disgust, the expression on his face was full of ugly refusal.

Seeing Li Er's mouth twitching for a while, Tang Sanzan also felt that he seemed to be too disrespectful to Li Er.

Therefore, in order to remedy, in order to save Li Er's face, Tang Sanzan chose to change the subject.

Considering that Li Er is also a decent person who needs face, Tang Sanzun looked at the song and dance performance below and nodded.

Just when he was about to speak, Tang Sanzan suddenly remembered that his master had given him a task.

Subconsciously opened the already familiar system panel, Tang Sanzan saw that the mission to harm Datang that reminded him of its existence was still unfinished.

Without too much entanglement, in order to take care of Li Er's face, Tang Sanzan spoke tactfully.

"In terms of singing and dancing, it is a true singing and dancing, and this is the dancer."

Li Er's face darkened, "Brother Yu thinks, these dancing singers like me are not serious?"

Tang Sanzun ignored Li Er's black face, nodded, and shook his head again.

His Majesty Li Er was stupefied, "Your brother Yu nodded and shook his head again, what exactly do you mean?"

Tang Sanzan straightened his words, "Well, these people are all decent people, but it's not appropriate for these people to dance Hu Xuanwu."

After all, he is a virtuous and eminent monk in his own eyes. Well, he has no virtue, but even a wicked eminent monk is still an eminent monk.

So when Tang Sanzan said this, Li Er became serious, "Where is it inappropriate?"

Tang Sanzan looked at the group of divas below who had no ring fat but only Yanshou, and shook his head, "They... are too thin."

"Too thin?" Li Er was stunned, what the hell was the reason, "Isn't it better to be thinner? In the past, there was a dancer Zhao Feiyan who could dance between people's palms. some?"

Listening to Li Er's words, Tang Sanzan looked at His Majesty Li Er contemptuously, and asked in the inexplicable expression of His Majesty Li Er,
"Your Majesty, do you know that according to valid statistics, two adults in the Three Realms died of obesity and disease?"

Li Er was taken aback. He really didn't know the data, and he didn't know which valid data it was.

just
"Isn't this probability already high? [-]% of them die from obesity!"

After hearing Li Er's answer, Tang Sanzun didn't speak, but just stared straight at Li Er, which made His Majesty Li Er's heart a little terrified.

"Brother Yu, I...Did I say something wrong?"

"Ugh!"

Tang Sanzan shook his head helplessly, "Since Your Majesty knows that [-]% of people die from obesity, why didn't you think that the other [-]% of people died from not being obese!

Doesn't this explain something? "

Li Er was stunned, "Explanation?"

Tang Sanzan patted his bald head helplessly, "Your Majesty, why don't you understand? Our ancestors have already hinted at what to explain!"

"Please tell me, brother Yu, what hints did the ancestors give?"

"Has Your Majesty not noticed?

In the characters left by our ancestors, most of the characters expressing human organs have the character month, such as liver, gallbladder, spleen, lung, kidney, stomach, and brain.

And in the same way, characters like fat and fat also have the word "month", what does this prove?
This proves that our ancestors want to tell us that obesity is a normal state.

Look at the words expressing unhealthy-sickness, tuberculosis, hernia, malaria, sores, madness, Your Majesty, look at the word "thin" again, can't you understand something?

This is what our ancestors told us - being thin is a disease that can be cured. "(Mythological world, the default common modern Chinese)

This unprecedented remark made Li Er dumbfounded.

Intuitively speaking, he felt that there was a big problem with this statement, but after hearing what Tang Sanzan said was justified, he couldn't find any refutation.

"Why, your majesty still doesn't believe it? If you don't believe it, your majesty can order the imperial physician to integrate the death cases in the world to see if fat people account for less than [-]% of the death population, while thin people account for as much as [-]%."

At this moment, Li Er really didn't know how to refute.

He always felt that Tang Sanzan's remarks seemed to have a lot of bad points, but he couldn't find anything to refute.

Even after listening to Tang Sanzan's presentation of the facts and data, Tang Sanzan even ordered the imperial physician to make statistics.

This statistical result shows that the facts are exactly as Tang Sanzan said.

When the real data was presented in front of him, His Majesty Li Er couldn't help being a little suspicious. Could it be that being thin is really a disease, and being fat is normal?
Could it be that the aesthetics of today's people are deformed?

Then, His Majesty Li Er thought of many words, such as rich state, which describes a person's living conditions are good and his body looks healthy.

Another example is Zhuangshuo. It seems that every word related to health has a faint connection with fat.

Look at the words that describe people's poor health, such as skinny.

In the end, His Majesty Li Er came to a conclusion—thinness seems to be really a disease.

In view of this, His Majesty Li Er issued a decree - from now on, wherever the Tang cavalry passes, fat is considered beautiful.

Of course, this fat is not the kind of fat that is as wide as a body, but the plump kind.

Originally, Tang Sanzan just wanted to fool Li Er, to see if he could make trouble for him, but whoever thought that Li Er was really fooled by himself.

Of course, he didn’t feel much guilt about this, let’s not say that the future of Datang in history always regarded fat as beauty, although he didn’t know if history was rewritten because of his words, although he I also know that another world has a history of 5000 years, and there is also a Tang Dynasty where fat is considered beautiful.

However, his actions can be regarded as helping the history of the current Tang Dynasty to go on the right track, right?

Of course, after he really fooled Li Er, in order to make up for the debt he owed to those girls who couldn't get fat, he told Li Er another statistic.

Scientific research shows that in the Tang Dynasty, more than [-]% of the women died of dystocia due to premature childbearing and unopened pelvis.

More than [-]% of the women are married at an early age, their bodies are not fully developed, and they suffer from diseases after giving birth.

This data made Li Er startled again.

And unlike the controversy over fat and thin, these data were placed in front of Li Er and the civil and military officials of the Manchu Dynasty. They were so bloody that His Majesty Li Er personally issued an imperial decree to amend the country's marriage laws.

All girls under the age of 16 are not allowed to marry, so even if they marry at the age of 17, they will be at least [-] when they give birth, which will reduce the chance of dying from dystocia to less than [-]%.

Of course, these are all things to say later, and each item of data cannot be ascertained on the spot at the current banquet.

In fact, after disgusting His Majesty Li Er for a while with the theory of being fat and thin, and watching His Majesty Li Er suddenly become disinterested from his original complacency, Tang Sanzan's mood was already wonderful.

When he was in a good mood to enjoy these singing and dancing performances, he really felt more and more dissatisfied.

"stop!"

When the song and dance performance was over and the singers were about to change a tune, Tang Sanzan called a stop.

After apologizing to Li Er, who was still dark-faced, Tang Sanzan walked off the stage in person and ran to the side of the musician.

"Well, your songs are too sour and not suitable for dance music."

In a word, the musician was confused directly.

The musicians looked at each other and said to themselves that these songs have been used as backup dancers for so many years. You told us that our songs are not suitable for backup dancers. Is it possible that you, a monk, can still come up with suitable songs for backup dancers?

Of course, despite the slander in his heart, the musician still bowed respectfully to the holy monk of the Tang Dynasty, who was especially favored at this time and no one dared to provoke him, "I don't know what kind of music the monk thinks is suitable for dance music."

Tang Sanzan thought for a while, his eyes swept over the face of a certain musician.

"Well, it's not who I'm targeting, I just want to say...a question, everyone here...is there anyone who can play the song Pure Land of Ultimate Bliss?"

(End of this chapter)