Eunuchs who traveled through the Qing Dynasty

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Needless to say, there were two tigresses who quarreled until they blushed and had thick necks, one was the Queen and the other was Princess Ning Xin.As for the reason for the quarrel, Xiao Ran could figure it out with his butt.I felt dizzy, secretly thinking that it is not suitable to stay here for a long time, and turned around to slip away.Unexpectedly, the two women had already spotted his tracks, and shouted at the same time: "Come back, don't leave!"

Xiao Ran wanted to cry but had no tears, so he turned around obediently and squeezed out a smile that was uglier than crying.

"Don't argue if you have the ability, just ask who the third son wants to be with! If they don't want to follow you, it's useless to grab it."

"Just ask! Do you think he is willing to be with you? Hmph, little man, tell me, who do you want to be with?"

"I, I..." Xiao Ran was stunned for a long time, but he didn't dare to fart.It is obvious that neither of these two women is a fuel-efficient lamp, and if they offend anyone, they will not have good fruit to eat.For the first time since crossing, Xiao Ran was helpless.

"Haha, if people don't talk, they just don't want to follow you anymore. It's so beautiful. Hmph, I'm so ignorant!"

"You let go...you are talking nonsense! If he doesn't speak, it means he doesn't want to go with you, or you can ask him yourself?"

"Just ask! Little Sanzi, I told you to follow me, do you dare not listen?"

"I..." With his keen intuition, Xiao Ran had a premonition that a huge danger would strike quickly.Shout out!Turning around and trying to escape, suddenly there was a pain in the ear, and it was the nth time without any accident that he fell into the clutches of the devil.The difference is that this time, the ears on both sides are tightly held.

"What's the matter, if they don't follow you, they still want to grab it? Let it go!"

"Why should I let go, you let go first!"

"no way!"

"Hmph, then don't let go!"

……

I rely on!I drip ears!Xiao Ran was tightly gripped by one side, and it probably won't be long before he should become a pig.Damn, does this still look like a big man?The blood went straight to Xiaohan, and he couldn't bear it for a while, and was about to fight with the two girls, when he heard a deep voice from the door: "Presumptuous! Stop it!"

Xianfeng!Tears welled up in Xiao Ran's eyes: "Brother, you are really in time for rain, drought and thunder!"If I'm one step late, buddy, I'm going to be torn in half by these two girls!

"You, look at the two of you, how decent are you! Could it be...cough cough, is it going to kill me?" Xianfeng's forehead was red, phlegm was rising, and he was out of breath from coughing.The queen and Ning Xin glared at each other, then slammed their hands hard.The severe pain information from both sides was transmitted to Xiao Ran's brain at the same time, and the strength and damage degree were basically the same.It can be concluded that the hands of these two women are dark enough.

"Why, haven't you been arguing enough?" Xianfeng finally stopped coughing, and said weakly, "Tell me about you, one of you is respected as the mother of the country, and the other is a golden branch and jade leaf, and you actually fought to snatch a slave! If it gets out , What is the face of my love Xinjueluo? What is the face of my majestic Qing Dynasty? Really, it is really shameless!"

well said!Xiao Ran couldn't help giving a thumbs up, damn it, these two girls dare to attack me, it's clearly because they don't want to give you Xianfeng face, and don't take your emperor seriously!How can such a daughter-in-law, such a younger sister, not be disciplined severely?beat!It's best to give fifty or one hundred boards each, and first avenge these two cute buddies with protruding ears!

While muttering vigorously in his heart, he suddenly heard Xianfeng say: "Since you all want to fight for this slave, you might as well chop it up! Mingquan, Mingquan!"

**Your uncle!The two of them are not, what does it matter to me?Xiao Ranqi's hands and feet were cold and he almost passed out.

"Your majesty!" The empress and Ning Xin yelled at the same time, and the empress rushed to say: "The emperor is angry, the concubine is just... just playing with the princess. It's just a stupid slave, and it's not a good thing (Xiao Ran scolded: you Ya is not a good thing, your whole family is not a good thing!), she, she wants a mistress, and the concubine... just let her do it!" She said, but the circles of her eyes turned red.

Ning Xin also became frightened, there is no joke, if the emperor let go of the words just now, Xiao Ran's head would really be lost.Hastily said: "No, Xin'er just didn't see the emperor's sister-in-law for a long time, so she came here to relieve her boredom. What's so good about this slave? I'm just talking, who cares!"

"Oh? So, you two don't want him anymore?" Xianfeng chuckled, "Well, since this is a slave that no one cares about, let him follow me first."

"Ah?" The queen, Ning Xin, and Xiao Ran stared at each other, and they were all stunned for a while.Xiao Ran even thought of so many beauties, from now on he was about to bid farewell to his flirtatious life, how could it not make him heart-rending and painful?I just feel the sour water gurgling in my mouth.

Xianfeng seemed to see his worries, and said with a smile, "Don't worry, this slave is only following me temporarily. After you two have discussed how to deal with him, I'll return him to you!"

Wow -!The three breathed a sigh of relief at the same time.Xianfeng waved his hand and said: "The third son is waiting for you, go back to Dongnuan Pavilion!"

Out of the central palace, Xianfeng stopped suddenly, tilted his head and looked up and down at Xiao Ran, his eyes were very strange, his heart felt hairy, and he said after a long time: "You are really not simple, my slave. That girl is always mischievous and self-willed, and she can't be pampered, so why did she just fall in love with you? Tell me, where did you learn this skill?"

Xiao Ran's heart skipped a beat, could it be that this girl discovered something?Hanging out with a princess is a heinous crime, ten heads are not enough to cut off!

After thinking about it for a while, Xiao Ran said anxiously: "This is probably because the servant was lucky enough to save the ninth princess. But it's hard to say, maybe it's because the princess suffered a lot in those few days and blamed the slave for not protecting her." Well, she may not be annoyed for a while."

What he said was extremely tactful, and Xianfeng was not stupid, of course he could hear the panic in his tone.Suddenly he smiled strangely, and said: "You don't have to be afraid, there are no outsiders here, I'll tell you the truth. I want to meet a woman, but after dating a few times, she doesn't seem to be interesting. Although you are a eunuch, you are very good at how to please women. So what I am looking for you... Do you understand?"

"Ah?" Xiao Ran was really dizzy now, thinking about it for a long time, but couldn't figure it out, "Long live Lord is the Ninth Five-Year Lord, which woman you fell in love with, it is her blessing from several lifetimes of cultivation! Just one order, can you just accept it into the palace? Why bother."

Xianfeng blushed suddenly, and he didn't know whether it was sickness or lust, and said coyly: "This is difficult, I seem to be inconvenient...inconvenient...that or something!"

Xiao Ran felt strange and asked a while before he understood.It turned out that Xianfeng was bored in the palace one day, so Mingquan led him to take a walk outside the palace.While having a drink in the Zuifeng Building, I happened to meet a woman in her early twenties, with a natural beauty and a very beautiful appearance.However, that girl behaved enchantingly, with a spring and a pretty face. When Xianfeng saw it, he was astonished, and felt that the beauties in the harem were not as good as her.

For a while, the horse couldn't be restrained, and the wine couldn't be bothered, so Mingquan asked Mingquan to inquire, and found out that the woman was the proprietress of Zuifenglou. She was twenty-one this year, and her husband died the previous year. Call her Widow Cao.This made Xianfeng very depressed. After all, she was a Han Chinese and a widow.Moreover, he was already sick, and the imperial physician repeatedly warned him to be cautious about intercourse, and he dared not publicize such promiscuity.

Returning to the palace in dismay, the widow Cao's frowns and smiles kept appearing in front of her eyes, until she didn't think about eating or drinking.Mingquan was very clear about the emperor's thoughts, so he naturally encouraged him, sent people to tell him several times, and prepared important gifts, at least he met him face to face.The widow Cao's family was well off and she was not short of money, so she didn't look down on the sick Xianfeng at all, so she dismissed her with a few words.

Looking back, I found out that this Widow Cao is not a chaste woman, but on the contrary, she has many lovers and constant scandals.Xianfeng was very handsome when he was young, and he was also a self-proclaimed romantic master. Hearing this, he was even more unconvinced, thinking that I am the emperor, and I am not as good as the ordinary people?He gritted his teeth and stomped his feet even more, determined to get the widow Cao.After looking for him three or five times, the woman always ignored him, and only then did he think of Xiao Ran.

Hearing these words, Xiao Ran tried his best not to laugh out loud, thinking that Xianfeng, you are really good enough, but the majestic king of a country wants to steal his mouth, and is afraid of being infamous. Do you want to be a bitch and set up an archway again?After thinking about it again, although this errand is not something glorious, it will definitely bring in a lot of money.Immediately patted his chest and said: "For the emperor's business, this slave will go up the mountain of swords and down into the sea of ​​fire. I will go through fire and water without hesitation. Just leave this matter to the slave!"

Xianfeng was excited for a moment, and patted his shoulder hard, coughing so hard that he couldn't speak.Xiao Ran waited for him to catch his breath, and deliberately kept it a secret, hesitantly said: "But..."

Immediately, Xianfeng's heart raised his throat, and he said anxiously: "But what?"

"Back to Lord Long Live, most women in this world love money and beauty. It goes without saying that Lord Long Live is handsome, refined and elegant; The meaning of the slave, we might as well do what we like, if we love money, we can use some silver; if we love some rare things, we can buy them for her. If we do both, it will get twice the result with half the effort.”

Only then did Xianfeng breathe a sigh of relief, and said: "This is easy. I will give you a decree later on, and each department will assist you in handling it. But if there is anything missing, don't ask me, just take it from them. But you have to give me careful attention." He said: If this matter is done, it is your third son who has done a great job; if it doesn't work out, hum, don't say I didn't warn you!"

"Don't worry, Lord Long Live, just wait and see!"

After receiving the imperial edict, Xiao Ran was not polite to Xianfeng, and directly paid 2 taels of silver from the House of Internal Affairs and handed it over to Baolu, asking him to find a decent house outside the palace to buy, and settle Xueyao first.Baolu didn't assign any errands this time, so he happened to have time, so he went happily.Xiao Ran was about to look for Mei Liangfu, and wanted to transfer two guards from him to show his appearance, but by chance, a young eunuch came to report that someone from the capital was looking for him.Xiao Ran's heart skipped a beat, and he thought, could it be someone sent by "Master"?Not daring to be negligent, he hurried out of the palace to have a look, but it was the three brothers from Huoqiying.One is Wang Meng, one is Ma Chao, and the other is He Laoliu.These three are all fast swordsmen selected by Duan Xingnian, who were born in Baoyi and have excellent martial arts skills.

Xiao Ran was taken aback, pulled the three of them to a quiet place behind him, and asked, "Why, did something happen over there at Daxing Mountain?"

He Laoliu said: "Don't worry, my lord. Brother Duan and Brother Cheng are here. Everything is fine. The two brothers asked us to send a message to my lord. The brothers have settled down and the treasure has been hidden. Send us three Come and report, if there is anything, you can send a letter back and forth."

Only then did Xiao Ran feel relieved, secretly thinking that this must be Cheng Tong's idea.I was in a hurry in Yuanmingyuan that day, but I forgot this step, and it was Cheng Tong who handled things carefully.He said happily: "You guys came just in time. I'm just about to do something, and I'm really short of manpower." He wrote a reply letter and asked Wang Meng to take it back to Daxing Mountain, leaving Ma Chao and He Laoliu by his side.

It's noon, Xiao Ran said: "Brothers are tired all the way, I'll take you to eat meat first, and have a good meal!"

Ma Chao and He Laoliu hurriedly said: "Then why, it's too late for our brother to serve you, how dare you spend money!"

Xiao Ran laughed, and said: "I really don't need to spend money on this meal, the emperor pays for it, let's just let go and eat his mother."

The three of them were all dressed in casual clothes, and they arrived at the Zuifeng Building swaggeringly.I picked an elegant seat next to the window on the second floor, patted the table and asked the bartender to serve the food.The facade of Zuifenglou is very luxurious, it can be regarded as one of the best restaurants in Chengde, and the dishes are really authentic.The specialty dishes that they picked were served on the table like flowing water, and the three of them exchanged cups, enjoying the meal.Xiao Ran has always had a good appetite, and it tastes good to eat. Ma Chao and He Laoliu were born in martial arts, and their appetites are astonishing, like vicious dogs that haven't been fed for a few days.

(Note: When Xianfeng transferred to Mulan, he was fortunate to be widow Cao. There is indeed such a saying in the unofficial history, but of course the pimp was not Xiao Ran, but Sushun. Note by Maolu.)

Zuifeng Building is luxuriously furnished, the dishes are exquisite, and the prices are outrageously expensive. For example, a dish of bad fish costs one, two or four dollars.This is the livelihood of poor people for half a year!But today, the three of them were afraid that they would spend less money, so they ordered three of them at once, and each of them took one and chewed it very hard, and the food was dripping with juice.The bartender looked straight at him. Although the people who came into this restaurant were rich people, it was the first time they met such a prodigal owner!

Feng Juanyun was full after eating, Xiao Ran patted his stomach and burped loudly, then slapped the table, and shouted: "***, is the feeling so deceitful in Zuifenglou? Or bully our buddies and can't afford it?" What's the matter with the money? I want you to have a bad fish, but you actually use this broken fish and rotten shrimp to deal with us! There are still fish bones! Damn it, it's obvious that I'm cheating, isn't it?"

"Huh?" The bartender didn't know what to say for a while.I have seen a lot of people who eat free food and provoke troubles, but I have never seen such unreasonable ones. "Master, aren't you joking? Which fish has no bones?"

"Fart!" He Laoliu slapped the table, and the shaking plates and bowls all jumped up, "I eat fish in other places, and I give them fucking coins, but you eat fish flowers with white money. Why are there still fishbone?"

The bartender's face turned red in anger, "My lord, whether you spend copper or silver, the fish are the same. Even if you spend gold, the fish should have thorns or long, right?"

"What kind of talk is this!" Xiao Ran said with a toothpick in his mouth, squinting his eyes, "Who says fish have to grow thorns? Our buddies eat bad fish and always eat fish without thorns. How come you have thorns growing out?" gone?"

The bartender sneered and said, "My lord, what did you say? But every fish has a fishbone. If there is no fishbone, is it still called a fish?"