as yesterday

She didn't speak all the way back, Xie Yongyan felt that she was too light-headed, so she asked He Yu to take her to a place where it was easy to take a taxi, and said that she would make an appointment next time and left first.

After Xie Yongyan got off the car, He Yu sighed, looked at the traffic lights ahead, and asked Liu Ci, "Are you hungry?"

It's dinner time.

Liu Ci lowered his head, turned the phone back and forth in his hand, and shook his head.

He Yu: "But I'm hungry, check your phone and find a restaurant, and I'll drive there."

She didn't mention anything else, but Liu Ci knew, and He Yu still understood.

In fact, she finally understood that she had been looking forward to it for many years, and when this moment really came, she felt heavy instead.

When He Yu was leaving in the ward, the glance he gave her almost made Liu Ci think that he saw a stranger.

It turned out that for He Yu to understand, she didn't need her to say it outright. At that time, the three of them were all present, and through Lian Xiaoli's hostility and Liu Ci's unyielding attitude, He Yu suddenly understood.

It's not like there was such a scene back then, but she didn't see it, but she didn't experience the see-saw for several years at that time.

It was completely dark, and outside the car window was the brightly lit city, their childhood settlement, a place that has been turned upside down after rapid development.

Liu Ci walked past that overpass more than once. In the past, there was the largest bookstore in city B at that intersection. In summer, with the air conditioner turned on, He Yu would go there with Liu Ci, and it took an afternoon to go there.

After the earth-shaking, the old shadows left by the memory can still be found.

Liu Ci didn't dare to speak, she was afraid of alarming He Yu, who was a bit abnormal at the moment, her intuition told her that He Yu's emotions had almost reached a critical point.

If it was He Yu who was 15 years old, he might go out and ride a bicycle until he was out of breath, sweating profusely, and his tears were dried by the wind, and it passed.

But the current He Yu has long since left behind the childishness of the past. You will always see her brilliance, but you can't see the haze she deliberately concealed.

"did you find it?"

He Yu knew that Liu Ci hadn't looked for it at all, and she was just looking for something to talk about, and she already knew where to eat.

Although I don't have the slightest appetite.

When they were young, they could sit down and chat without any problems, and eat and chat together when they had more money.

Eating is not a necessary element for chatting, but growing up is different. People's time is crowded again and again, and it seems that only eating time can be occupied.

On the contrary, pure conversation between friends is very rare.

She found Chuan Chuan Xiang, which opened behind a supermarket, with chain hotels on top, and the parking lot below was full of buses.

There were quite a few people in the shop, He Yu got out of the car and asked Liu Ci to wait, she went to see if there was any space.

She came after a while, and Liu Ci got out of the car with her.

The two of them walked in tandem, and when the glass door was pushed open, the spicy smell of the pavement could be felt. The boss was quite old and his beard had turned white. He Yu ordered a mandarin duck pot, scanned the code and asked Liu Ci to order.

Liu Ci held her mobile phone, while He Yu propped his face with one hand, in a daze.

It's not an embarrassing atmosphere, but it's too difficult for the two of them to be awkward.

"It's over."

Liu Ci returned the phone to He Yu. The room was warm. He Yu took off his coat, which was a round-neck sweater. She put the coat aside, ordered a few by herself, and placed the order.

The bottom of the pot was served first. There was a clear distinction between the white soup and the red soup in the mandarin duck pot, and it was steaming. There were several high school students sitting next to each other, chattering and laughing from time to time.

The skewers were placed one after the other, He Yu put down his hairy belly first, and stuffed it into the spicy red soup. She put down the skewers and said, "Am I stupid?"

Liu Ci was holding a bunch of beef tenderloin, before putting it into the red soup, with a shake of his hand, the string rushed into the white soup.

"No."

He Yu laughed, "You clearly think so."

The surrounding area was too noisy, and their speech could easily be overshadowed.

After He Yu finished speaking, she opened Fanta, and with a snort, she inserted the straw in and pushed it in front of Liu Ci.

Liu Ci took it and shook his head, "I've never felt that way before."

He Yu asked again: "Then do you hate me?"

They sit by the window. Every booth in this Chuan Chuan Xiang is blocked by high shelves. You can vaguely know how old the group is next to you, but you can’t see their faces clearly, and the voices are wave after wave. .

Liu Ci: "...don't hate."

He Yu looked at the tumbling mandarin duck pot, took a sip of Fanta, "Have hated it, don't pretend, you have held grudges since childhood."

Liu Ci: "That's you."

He Yu: "I'll be fine after a fight, but you're holding back."

The Fanta was very cold, and there were drops of water on the can, He Yu squeezed it, and swallowed a mouthful of soda, his cheeks were sore from the ice, after all, he was still awake a lot.

"If I never find out, are you going to hold it in forever?"

Liu Ci shook her head, she was wearing contact lenses, and He Yu specially chose the side where the smoke wouldn't roll for her to sit on.

"I do not know."

She also took off her coat, and inside was a navy blue and white sweater, which made her look more elegant. Liu Ci's whole person had a sharp simplicity, which was no different from He Yu's angular gentleness.

They are the opposite of each other, and in a sense, their temperament has achieved a subtle unity.

At this moment, the soda in her palm hit her heart, like a stone hit her head suddenly, she didn't know how to face it for a while.

She came back not only for He Yu, but also for the end.

Living is really a kind of torture for her, and she hopes that she can take a good look at this person before she dies.

There are enough regrets in life. It is a pity that the person she likes does not know that she likes her, and it is a pity that her parents are not perfect. But she still underestimated the surge of suppressed love at the moment of meeting.

She couldn't bear it.

So jealousy, hatred, curiosity... The emotions that were locked up in the past poured out, and they actually overwhelmed the torture that her mother gave her, but they still kept her awake at night.

Even though she lived under the same roof as He Yu, she was still uneasy.

Whether or not to let He Yu know, Liu Ci has considered many times, and she almost blurted out her fragility in the middle of the night, but she just gave out a somewhat naive reason.

The phrase I love you still can't say it.

What can He Yu know? If she also likes me, she would have noticed it a long time ago. To put it bluntly, she is still an unrequited love. These years, she has never changed.

Fa Xiao is also different from ordinary friends. There are too many pasts worth looking back on between them, so that once the face is torn apart, there is no room for change.

She broke up with He Yu once, it was one-sided, and that time was mixed with the childishness and anger of a teenager.

And if they break up again this time, it will be really inseparable, which is too ugly.

At the beginning, Liu Ci had the mentality that it was a big deal, but after getting along with He Yu for a long time, he became more and more unable to make a decision.

It's too difficult, she can make instant choices on many things, but when it comes to matters related to He Yu, if she is reckless once, she can only hesitate for the rest of her life.

"There are times when you don't know."

He Yu laughed, and she picked up the boiled tripe, one mouthful was so spicy that she coughed, and her lips turned red when she drank it with soda.

"It's been so many years, isn't it sad?"

After He Yu finished coughing, this sentence came out.

She looked at Liu Ci with her face propped up, and looked at Liu Ci's thin and pointed chin. In her impression, this guy was still a little bean when he had a round face.

She has never liked anyone, but there is no express rule that if she has never liked anyone, she will not understand this feeling. There are some reckless people who engage in art, but most of them are sensitive, and those who are sentimental are a minority and a majority.

This kind of long love in the works will produce strong empathy after being exaggerated, but He Yu feels sad when she thinks that Liu Ci has lived with that kind of mood for so many years.

It's too difficult to empathize, but she and Liu Ci grew up together, and too many emotions were caught in the time of growing up together, but it didn't seem difficult.

And the person who made Liu Ci sad was actually himself.

If it was someone else, she could still beat and curse people like before, and find a group of people to confront them.

But why, it would be me.

He Yu's eyes were a little guilty, Liu Ci and her looked at each other for a few seconds and then turned away, unable to bear this kind of tenderness.

She thought that He Yu would ask why he would ask why he left in the first place, and even about the conflict between Lian Xiaoli and her.

But He Yu didn't ask.

Just such a sentence, Liu Ci is about to cry.

It was too much to bear.

He Yu took out a piece of paper and handed it to her, "Don't cry, the contact lenses will fall off."

Liu Ci: "You messed with me."

He Yu: "It's my fault."

Liu Ci: "But you are right."

He Yu: "That's because the hot pot is too spicy."

It was indeed very spicy, so hot that He Yu's eyes were sour. She felt sorry for Liu Ci because of her conditioned reflex for so many years, just like she heard Liu Yu talk about Liu Ci's ex-boyfriend who failed her.

But thinking about it now, maybe Liu Ci hastily wanted to set aside the rest of his life and put this relationship on hold.

The other party didn't tell me where they were going, and everyone was at fault.

But right and wrong in love is too difficult to measure with correct values, of course He Yu would be partial to Liu Ci.

On the other hand, she was at a loss.

It is not unusual for her to be liked by girls. It can be said that from Lian Xiaoli on, her life seems to have been taken to another path inexplicably.

There are more same-sex gazes.

This is a passive acceptance.

Back then, she rejected Lian Xiaoli categorically, but she was concerned about the other party's tragic experience, so she dragged on for several years, and finally ended in an ugly situation.

So if you don't want to accept it, you can't have any sympathy. It's better to be cruel.

But the other party is Liu Ci.

It was Liu Ci that she kept in her heart since she was a child. She introduced it to countless people and bragged to countless people that I would protect her forever.

Shen Youqian said, "You are a woman."

He Yu said: "Women can't do it anymore, then you are not allowed to blow bubbles."

Apart from gender stereotyping, her desire to protect Liu Ci will not waver at all.

"He Yu, don't make things difficult."

Liu Ci went to get the contact lenses, and put on her framed glasses when she came back.

Her eyes were red, and the two crybabys would still cry involuntarily when they met when they grew up.

She said this very lightly.

He Yu: "I'm quite embarrassed."

She handed Liu Ci a bunch of chicken gizzards, "But if it's you, it's not too difficult."

She sighed, "I don't ask anything else, do you want to fall in love with me?"

There is no need to ask a lot of questions, such as why do you like me, is it because of this reason that you left at the beginning, do you still like me now, and did you come back because of me.

He Yu is a person who is stubborn at certain times and exquisite at other times.

Maybe I used to cover up the seven orifices in Liuci before, but now they suddenly opened up, and I felt like seeing the bright moon after pushing through the dark clouds.

Liu Ci was startled, the half-bitten chicken gizzard fell into the bowl, her lips were stained with sauce, she raised her eyes to look at He Yu hastily, then quickly lowered her head.

said in a panic——

"I...don't dare to think about it."

The author has something to say: After writing this article, it feels like no one likes He Yu?

I personally like it very much, she is actually the most tolerant, a girl said before that she didn't stand up

In fact, it is because her most tense things are suppressed, alas, it is basically in the second half

I feel that it is boring to write here and discuss it. Everyone should help themselves.