takeaway spoof

Thinking of delivering food by himself on a small battery at night, with a cold dead man stuck behind him, Zhang Ya felt bad, but this scene still happened. At this moment, the homeless man was wearing a hood and The baseball cap sits on the back seat of the small battery.I just explained to my boss and colleagues that a relative came to play, and I was busy and didn’t have time to take him around, so I took him to sit in the back while delivering food and took him around the city.

"You have to follow me to deliver a takeaway, are you afraid that I will run away?" Zhang Ya said to the people in the back seat angrily.

"Yeah, I'm afraid you will be taken away by the unfinished building." Fortunately, the man hugged his waist and lay on his back, "I can protect you now, yes It's not great!" As he spoke, he leaned over and kissed Zhang Ya's face.

"Fuck!" Just as Zhang Ya was about to yell, he saw a colleague from across the road who came back from the store looking at him. Zhang Ya turned his head away in embarrassment, "You just sit here, be honest!"

After speaking, Zhang Ya went into the store, ready to rest for a few minutes, waiting for the takeaway from the kitchen.

The colleague just now also walked in and sat on the chair next to Zhang Ya, "Yo, I brought my little boyfriend along!"

"Ah? No, no!" Zhang Ya thought to himself, I don't like men!I don't even like a dead person!

"Call in and introduce us. I don't know what your little boyfriend looks like?"

"That's right," several employees who were delivering food in the store came over to make a fuss, and an employee who was sweeping the floor even boldly went to the door and pulled people in.

"No need," a hoarse voice came from under the hood and baseball cap, "He told me to wait obediently at the door..."

"Come in and sit down!"

When Zhang Ya saw the homeless man who was pulled in, he was in a bad mood.

"Take off the hat and introduce you to me." Seeing that Zhang Ya's boyfriend's hat was tightly wrapped, the colleagues were very curious about what he looked like. Several people surrounded Zhang Ya and his boyfriend. Seeing this, Zhang Ya hurriedly took the homeless man's hand, "There's nothing to see, let's spread out! I'm going to deliver food!"

In the unfinished building tonight, there are no Taoist priests and policemen busy, and the remaining policemen and young Taoist priests are all outside the cordon.The old Taoist leader went back to Qingyun Temple to deal with business, so the affairs of Lishui Mingju stopped for the time being.

"Wang He, hurry up and keep up, don't dawdle!"

"I'm not walking now! Why are you in a hurry, it's still growing at night!"

Outside the cordon, several young people are sneaking around. They are college students in this city, and they came to the haunted Lishui Tea House to test their courage tonight.

"I said, is your idea okay? Don't be caught by the police before you have fun for a while!"

"If you are afraid, go away! Coward!"

"Bah! I'm a pure man!"

The five figures crossed the security line while complaining to each other. I don't know whether it was luck or misfortune. Tonight happened to be a night when the security was relaxed, and a few people easily entered the interior of the unfinished building without much effort.It was very cold inside, and the penetrating cold made the two girls in the team hug each other in fear.

At this moment, the policemen and a few young Taoist priests are having dinner together.

"Is the Taoist priest haunted by ghosts or is someone operating in secret?" A police officer asked while eating. This mission has shaken his world view a little.

"If ghosts are causing trouble, it is our responsibility. If there are living people making troubles, it is the responsibility of the police officers..."

"Captain, just now the surveillance found that someone had slipped into the building!" Just as he was speaking, a policeman ran over to report the situation.

"Quick, search inside!" The policeman who was still eating put down the lunch box, and several little Taoist priests followed.

A few young people in the building thought that the addition of the police seemed to increase the difficulty and fun of the game, and continued to wander around the building while laughing.The two girls were pushed by someone in the dark, a little scared, and suggested that they want to go out, but the others didn't agree, and the five of them still walked in the building together.

"There are people over there!" The policeman spotted the figures of five students and ran towards them.

"Let's go!" A few students saw the police coming, pushed each other and ran upstairs, and the group started a chase.Just after a while, the police lost a few students. They ran up and down the stairs but only returned to the original floor. The surrounding temperature seemed to drop, and the air seemed to freeze.

"Please take out the amulets!" The little Taoist took a few amulets and pasted the talisman papers in the corridor as he walked, and then went out. Looking back, the talisman papers had faded in just a few minutes. I don't know what happened.

"There is someone over there, Captain!"

Following the direction pointed by the police officer, everyone saw a few slowly walking figures standing on the edge of the platform of the building, but the direction of their walking was towards the outside of the platform, and at this time a figure had already fallen.

"Wait!" The police yelled as they ran towards the people on the platform. During the tens of meters of running, another figure fell down, "Squat down and don't move! Otherwise, I will start gun!"

However, several figures were still moving slowly, as if they hadn't heard the police's shout at all.The policeman with a pistol quickly shot the leg of the figure behind him, and the figure fell to the ground in an instant. Seeing that the figure in front was about to walk out of the platform, he rushed over to grab the figure in a few steps.Just when he felt that he had saved two people and felt relaxed, something under his feet tripped him, and he stumbled and fell downstairs, lying with the other three corpses below. Looking at the platform just now, But it was smooth and smooth, empty.

Here at the fast food restaurant, after a few days, everyone is full of curiosity about Zhang Ya's new boyfriend, but this living dead person still sticks to him every night to deliver food, Zhang Ya doesn't know how to explain it to his colleagues, he really doesn't want to go to work up.

However, it is impossible not to go to work, and it is impossible in this life.

When it was time for the lunch delivery, the homeless man arrived as scheduled, came in to talk to Zhang Ya, and touched his face with his hand. He quickly took the takeaway and dragged him out.In the interval between delivering food at night, he and his colleagues sat in the corner of the store to rest, and the homeless man and the small battery were left at the door.

The colleague patted him on the shoulder, "If you leave him at the door like this again, be careful and break up with you again!"

"It's better to divide it up, so you don't have to pester me all day long!" Zhang Ya tilted his head against the wall, staring at the figure on the small battery outside the door with disgust.

"Is there a fight?"

"It's nothing, I'm going to continue working." Zhang Ya was carrying the takeaway again and was about to continue working. When he walked to the small battery, the living dead homeless man was still motionless, "Why are you so dazed, sit down and go! "

He was still leaning against the side of the car, motionless, the eye that was blocked by the bandage under the shadow of the brim of the hat was slightly shining red, "Let's go home!"

"Huh? There are still a few takeaways here, let's go home after delivery!"

"Let's go back now, please!" The homeless Shen Rong shook his arm, not knowing what happened.

"Are you sick!"

"Let's go back..." The arm holding Zhang Ya seemed to be trembling.

"Okay, okay, I'll put the takeaway back, let's go back!"

Zhang Ya bit the bullet and brought the takeaway back to the shop, "Boss, I'm sorry, my relatives are in a mood, so I have to go back now..."

"What's wrong with your boyfriend, forget it, let's go!"

Zhang Ya wants to cry, but now even the boss knows about their relationship, no, no, they are enemies!Yeah!It's not a couple relationship!I don't know what kind of idea that person is planning, forget it, tell the boss, let's go back first.Zhang Ya was riding a small battery, and Shen Rong, a homeless man, was holding him in the back seat. Zhang Ya felt that the cool body in the back seat was still shaking slightly.

"What's the matter with you?"

"He's coming, they're coming..."

"Who's coming?"

Zhang Ya drove the small battery back home in doubt. When he went upstairs, he was still thinking about how much money he lost today. While thinking about it, he opened the door absent-mindedly. Shen Rong snatched the key from his hand and quickly opened it. The door, rushing in, closed more than half of the windows, and all the bed curtains were drawn at once.

"What's the matter?" Zhang Ya looked at his behavior and was a little confused. Could it be that he was afraid of something?

"Quick! Go and close the curtains on the balcony, don't, don't turn on the lights!"

"Okay, okay, let me have a meal first." Zhang Ya, who was hungry, just sat down and put the dinner he packed from the store on the table, ready to eat, when Shen Rong pulled him up, and then started Take off his coat and trousers.

"If you don't let me eat, you want to suck my energy directly! You want to suck me to death tonight, don't you!" Zhang Ya was very angry at his inexplicable behavior along the way, and grabbed his collar.

"Don't ask me why tonight, just do as I say!"

"Okay, okay, everything is up to you, everything is up to you", Zhang Ya saw that there seemed to be some crazy look in his eyes, so he obediently took off his clothes and put Shen Rong in his arms and got into bed. People are trembling.

"Just sleep with your arms around me tonight, no matter what you hear or see, don't worry about it!"

"Okay, okay." In the dark room, Zhang Ya saw something glowing red under the bandage, and he stretched out his hand to see it.

"do not move!"

Hearing the sound, Zhang Ya withdrew his hand obediently, hugged his slender waist, sighed and closed his eyes.He was really tired after delivering food all day, and he fell asleep with the cool doll in his arms after a while.

Sleeping in the middle of the night, Zhang Ya felt extremely cold, cold to the bone, colder than when he was sleeping on the chair in the square that night, he felt very puzzled, he didn't feel so cold when sleeping with this dead person in his arms , and even warmed him up in the morning.But he was still very sleepy, he squinted his eyes and didn't want to get up, so he tightened the quilt and prepared to continue sleeping.In a daze, the person in his arms trembled again, and Zhang Ya felt that he was in a boundless dark and cold place.

Zhang Ya woke up from the fright, but when he opened his eyes, the room seemed to be the same, without any changes. His heart was beating very hard, and the person in his arms was also trembling constantly.Zhang Ya got up slightly, wanting to get out of bed to see what's wrong, Shen Rong suddenly grabbed him and whispered, "Don't move", Zhang Ya trembled down again, hugging the person in his arms tightly , trembling with him.

The eye under the bandage glowed dark red in the dark night.

At some point, Zhang Ya fell asleep in a daze again, and when it was about to dawn, he woke up, and the person in his arms no longer trembled, and the eye under the bandage no longer glowed.

Zhang Ya still didn't know what happened, he went to the kitchen with a dazed expression to heat up the meal he brought back last night, and he saw that last night's meal was amazing, and there were still some unmelted ice slags on it.Zhang Ya was thinking about what happened last night while eating, when he looked up, the person on the bed was sitting up and staring at him.

"What, what's wrong?"

Seeing his straight eyes, Zhang Ya felt a little scared, did he get tricked by something?

Shen Rong lowered his head again, not knowing what he was thinking.Zhang Ya poured a glass of water and handed it to him, Shen Rong took the glass, Zhang Ya saw that he was still normal, so he sat down beside the bed with his lunch box

"What happened last night, I woke up in the middle of the night, dark and cold", Zhang Ya didn't know how to describe the strange feeling last night.

"he came......"

"Who's here?" Zhang Ya was still puzzled.

"Kunshan Lishi - a curse for all the evil spirits lingering in the world", Shen Rong tilted his head and touched his right eye under the bandage, "He wants to catch me, no, maybe he is going to catch something in the unfinished building Something is wrong, that array is more complicated than I imagined..."

"Are you the arrester from the underworld? They're here to arrest you." Zhang Ya has already imagined a series of plots such as the judge from the underworld, so hurry up and arrest the living dead who is dependent on his house.

"No, he is a collection of evil spirits. He will only continue to devour his own kind according to his instinct. The bigger he grows, the similar evil spirits will attract him to appear, and then he will continue to devour his own kind and continue to grow... ..."

Zhang Ya imagined a greedy ghost, "You, you are also an evil ghost!?"

Shen Rong raised his bandage-covered head, and his cloudy one-eyed fixedly stared at him, which made Zhang Ya feel a little hairy.

"Well, I, I'm going to wash the dishes..." Zhang Ya jumped out of bed with a disposable lunch box and ran to the kitchen. After a while, he poked his head out from the kitchen secretly, Shen Rong was still in the same posture just now Sitting on the bed blankly.

When it was almost noon, Zhang Ya packed up and got ready to go to work, "Well, are you coming tonight?"

"Ah."

After delivering the food in the evening, Zhang Ya asked Shen Rong to sit in the store and wait for him to collect his things before going home. Two colleagues who were about to get off work saw Shen Rong sitting there alone without saying a word, so they ran to talk to him.

"How did you two know each other?"

"We know each other while delivering food."

The face under the double cover of the hood and the baseball cap is really a bit curious, a colleague reached out and took off Shen Rong's hat when he was not prepared.

"Mom!"

From a distance, Zhang Ya saw several colleagues surrounding Shen Rong screaming and jumping away, and ran over immediately.

"What are you looking at!" He pulled up Shen Rong's hood to cover his bandaged head, then picked up the hat on the ground and put it on again, "He, he is sick", Zhang Ya explained hesitantly. A colleague saw this and left quickly.

Shen Rong leaned on Zhang Ya's body, and rubbed his head on his chest aggrievedly.

"It's okay, let's go home." Zhang Ya pulled Shen Rong over and got on the small battery.

"Wait a minute, I want to go to the unfinished building."

"What are you looking at, do you still think I'm not dead enough, and want to drag me to sacrifice the magic circle?"

"Kunshan Lishi is not here now." Shen Rong touched his right eye under the bandage, and there was nothing unusual, "I want to take a closer look at what that magic circle is, and whether it will do any harm to you... ..”

In the end, Zhang Ya rode the small battery to the place he least wanted to go - the unfinished building.

The unfinished building was surrounded by a cordon, and there were police officers constantly patrolling. Zhang Ya even saw a Taoist-looking man with sharp eyes.

"You can't see it, let's go!"

Shen Rong touched his eyes under the bandage, and there was nothing unusual about it, "You...", he looked at Zhang Ya, and was about to say something, when suddenly a red light flashed from under his fingers , he covered his eyes under the bandage with his hands vigorously.

"What's the matter, let me see." Zhang Ya has become a little more courageous recently, just now he pulled off a little bandage with his hands, but suddenly there was a bright red light under the bandage, and the dark red spell on the eyeball became more and more bright red.

A gust of gloomy wind blew up, the jacket was filled with the sound of the wind whirring, the brim of Shen Rong's hat was about to fly off, Zhang Ya pressed down on the hat, and took him into his arms, Shen Rong in his arms Rong was trembling, and Zhang Ya's heart was beating wildly because of the wind.

"Don't move", suddenly Shen Rong leaned towards his face, and after speaking, the lips of the two of them stuck together. Zhang Ya could probably guess that the thing from last night came again, although he wanted to push it away from his arms at this moment. The homeless man, but he could only hold the person in his arms tremblingly and did not dare to move.

The police officers who were guarding around the unfinished building just now were all staggered by the sudden gust of wind, and some of them with weak yang energy had already sat on the ground and couldn't get up.At this moment, in Shen Rong's eye that was exposed outside the bandage, what was reflected was a giant shadow like a hill that suddenly appeared out of thin air. Hidden in a dark place where the light source cannot reach, it looks like a headless giant corpse. If you look closely at the muscle mass, every muscle fiber is stretched and squeezed to a distorted human face. This is a Kunshan wrestler.

Legend has it that the monster born in Kunlun in ancient times is the nightmare of every ghost who does not want to reincarnate and miss the world.Kunshan Lishi is a collection of ghosts. The more vicious the ghost, the more he will be attracted. He will devour the ghosts wandering in the world and transform them into his own flesh and blood. When he eats too many ghosts, he will not be able to When supporting one's own body, it will disintegrate by itself and turn into ashes, and all the ghosts will disappear, erasing the last trace of this world.At this moment, his palm was skimming the ground, and he grabbed two wandering ghosts and stuffed them into his mouth. The patrolmen on the ground felt another gust of wind sweeping through them.

The few Taoist priests who were still checking the magic circle in the underground parking lot of the unfinished building also suddenly felt cold and oppressive, and could not breathe.

"Master, senior brother", several young Taoist priests shivered in the protective circle, "Those ghosts are also trembling..." The sudden vision made them not know what to do Well, they don't know the existence of Kunshan Lux.

Shen Rong still hugged Zhang Ya tightly, hoping that his yang energy could temporarily cover his aura. At such a short distance, if he ran, he would be unable to run. He didn't want to be swallowed and merged into that huge body. In the end, it will be wiped out in ashes and will never be reborn forever.

There were some roaring sounds in his ears, and before Zhang Ya had a chance to turn his head to look, Kunshan Lushi had disappeared. He didn't find the main meal he wanted to eat, so he disappeared.At this time, there were 48 ghosts gathered in the magic circle, because one was missing due to the intervention of the police.

When the Kunshan wrestler disappeared, Shen Rong finally breathed a sigh of relief, and sat down on the ground with Zhang Ya, both of them couldn't stand up for a long time, Zhang Ya simply lay on his back on the ground panting.The police are not doing much better, someone has already called 120

The little Taoist priests who ran up from the basement felt inconceivable about the strong yin energy just now. Even the extremely hostile ghosts have never seen such coercion before. Could it be a ghost king or something.They took out the compass to check, and the thick ghostly aura in the basement just now disappeared. Could it be that they hid it just now?

"Hey? Strange, is there something outside here?" A little Taoist leader looked at the compass pointer and saw the directions of Zhang Ya and Shen Rong. Seeing this, the little Taoist leader felt a little familiar. It was the little Wang Daoist who unwrapped the lottery in the temple a few days ago.

Zhang Ya accidentally met the eyes of the little Taoist priest, and he was still a little puzzled why Shen Rong pulled him onto the small battery when he was staring at him.

After returning home, he finally breathed a sigh of relief. Zhang Ya is now sitting at the small table with a sad expression on his face, holding his growling stomach. Where did it go.

"Is there any bread in the kitchen?"

"Okay," Zhang Ya was still feeling sorry for the dinner he lost today.

Shen Rong came over with a slice of bread, and carefully spread blueberry jam on it for him, "Eat it."

Zhang Ya was stunned when he saw the hand passing the food, and his body couldn't help leaning back.

"Just washed, not dirty..." Seeing this, Shen Rong tugged at his cuffs.

"I...I don't feel too hungry..."

"eat fast."

The slice of bread was stuffed into his mouth, so Zhang Ya had no choice but to eat it, "I'll let you continue to breathe after eating for a while..." He turned around and continued nibbling on the slice of bread. See the hands of the black and blue corpse.

Why am I so unlucky!Zhang Ya couldn't help asking himself such a question, he couldn't help but feel that he was not far from death.

When Zhang Ya lay down under the bed at night, the homeless man with a living corpse also lay down with him as usual. At this moment, Zhang Ya was just lucky that the bed in this rental house was bigger. , two people can still squeeze

"Do you think that thing will come again?"

"Maybe, he didn't catch what he wanted to catch today."

"He wants to catch you?"

"He should want the ghost in the magic circle. If he finds me, he will probably eat me by the way. He has chased me before..."

"That's just right, I'll be clean after I'm taken away." Zhang Ya pushed Shen Rong who was lying on top of him with some disgust, but turned his head to meet a staring eye at him, "I... ..No, I, I didn't mean that... Hey, what do you think he looks like?"

"I suggest you don't see it..."

"Why, is it uglier than you?"

The one-eyed stared at him even more firmly.

"I...Master Shen, I was wrong..."

The author has something to say:

I wish everyone a happy ending of the National Day...not happy, I am not happy at all, a new idiot came up with a mobile app to sign in, sign your mother!Why do you want me to live unhappy, I feel that being signed in and sitting in that seat is like going to jail (I don’t have a penny, if I give money every day, I won’t complain about signing in), I wish everyone who signed in Happy jail time every day!That's right, I'm just here to be discouraged, click X in the upper right corner if you don't like it, don't look at it, thank you!