My cousin's daily routine

In the summer vacation after the college entrance examination, I never went to see Xiao Yuan again, and Xiao Yuan seemed to know that I was deliberately avoiding him, so he didn’t come to see me, only on my birthday (note: the birthday here is according to the lunar calendar), Xiao Yuan sent a message WeChat - happy birthday.

When I was looking through the messages on WeChat, I thought that Xiao Yuan might explain, but I didn’t expect that after the holiday, Xiao Yuan only left a message—see you in university.

I remembered that in the second semester of the third year of high school, Xiao Yuan specifically asked me which university I wanted to go to. My grades were usually in the middle, and only a few times I was lucky enough to get into the top position. I thought that a good university would not be my turn. So I simply asked Xiao Yuan which university he wanted to go to, but he was silent, and then hesitantly said, "I want to go to a university with you." I was secretly surprised, I thought we were in the same school My fate only ended in high school, and no matter what, a top student like Xiao Yuan would not go to the same university as me.I was a little happy in my heart, but I still pretended to be a good brother, "Xiao Yuan, you have a bit of ambition, okay? You can choose a good university like you." He stopped talking, and I He coughed lightly, "Tell me, which university do you want to go to? I will work hard and try to go to a university with you." He gave me a tentative look, and finally announced the name of a university. I know that This university is not the best school he can get into. He is leaving room for me. With my grades, if I work a little harder, I may still be able to get into it.I'm a little relieved, it's not in vain that I loved this cousin so much when I was a child, I don't know why I didn't expose Xiao Yuan's white lie at that time, I just patted him on the shoulder with a smile.

"Okay, I'll work hard and try to go to a university with you."

My little cousin, who used to be chasing me behind me, is now, for the first time, my back.

In the end, I was admitted to that university as I wished, and in September, when the summer heat had not yet dissipated, I went to the same university to register with Xiao Yuan.This is also the first time Xiao Yuan and I met after that kiss.

When I saw him on the day of reporting, I thought the atmosphere would be awkward. In fact, my cousin behaved very naturally, as if nothing had happened, as if what happened before was all my own absurd dream.I breathed a sigh of relief in my heart. It would be good if things were just covered up like this.However, I was wrong.

Those absurd dreams will still appear in my mind at night, and those secret fragments that cannot be understood by outsiders make people blush and heartbeat just thinking about them afterwards. Every time I wake up from the dream, I wake up with a start. I was so shocked that I broke out in a cold sweat, and my heartbeat couldn't calm down for a long time.Every time I see Xiao Yuan's face and think of those dreams, I feel guilty.So, intentionally or unintentionally, I always want to avoid him, so that I won't become at a loss, don't have to face those ridiculous dreams, and face the self in the dream that I don't even know myself.

Xiao Yuan didn't mention that kiss again, he just stayed by my side as before, but I couldn't treat him as usual, instead, I always deliberately caught the flashing expression in his eyes and observed his expression. Every move, I don't know why I care about him so much, it seems that the Xiao Yuan I knew in the past has too many sides that I don't know, I hope to know the Xiao Yuan that I don't know, and then... what to do, I I don't know anymore.

The whole morning class finally ended with the ringing of the bell. I casually stuffed the textbooks into my schoolbag. As the crowd poured out of the classroom, Xiao Yuan had already been waiting for me in front of the classroom door. We still ate together every day like in high school. In fact, our way of getting along has not changed. I even think that the "like" that Xiao Yuan thought was just mistaking the kind of liking for friends for the kind of liking between lovers.As if fascinated, I suddenly thought, what can two male lovers do, do they also go on dates like men and women in love?What are you going to do on a date? Don't you feel bored?As soon as this idea came out, even I was frightened... I gave the culprit who caused me to think too much with a little shame, and my cousin just smiled back at me innocently.

When we came to the third floor of the cafeteria, we went to queue for Lanzhou Beef Ramen. In fact, this has become our noon routine.Xiao Yuan knew that I liked noodles since I was a child. At that time, I dragged Xiao Yuan to various noodle restaurants to eat noodles. I remembered that I had never asked my cousin whether he liked noodles or not. He always said no. He let me drag him away without saying a word, I thought, since he didn't object, he shouldn't hate it, so I always lined up with Xiao Yuan at the ramen window with peace of mind.

It will take a while for the noodles to be ready. After we ordered the noodles, we sat down near the window.We chatted casually, strange people and strange things in college life, complained about the full schedule, chatting with each other, and when there was nothing to talk about, I started to pick up the phone and pretend to check the messages , I don’t know why I was afraid of this kind of silence, and I didn’t think it was anything before, but since... then, I always feel that if I don’t maintain the previous state, something will become very bad.

Although I didn't raise my head, I could always feel the gaze from Xiao Yuan, and that gaze seemed to carry heat. Every time I felt it, I had the urge to get up and escape from here immediately. Even so, I didn't want to Let Xiao Yuan know that I care about it, and try my best to pretend to be calm and breezy.At this time, I would be very envious of that kind of natural stupidity, but unfortunately I am not.

But the silence was soon broken.When I looked up, I saw a girl with long fluttering hair approaching our table, who seemed to be our classmate.The girl approached Xiao Yuan and said a few words softly, but from my position I couldn't hear what she said, Xiao Yuan smiled lightly, and then the girl quickly stuffed a long strip into Xiao Yuan's backpack out of the pocket, and then left with a flushed face.Although I didn't see it clearly, I guessed that it was a pink envelope.

I glanced at Xiao Yuan meaningfully, but Xiao Yuan acted as if nothing had happened, and smiled at me, "It's not what you think."

What do I think?I was a little annoyed, as if my thoughts were being seen through by others, so I tried to defy him: "What does it have to do with me when you receive a love letter, just accept a love letter like this..." From the corner of my eye, I saw Xiao Yuan wrinkle Frowning, the look in his eyes was dim, I knew he was really angry like this, so I stopped talking.

His throat moved, and he said in a soft tone I had never heard before: "You know I like..."

"Stop talking!" I suddenly raised the volume to attract many people to look at us, and the air was silent for a while.I simply stood up and turned my head to avoid looking at him, "I'm going to end the noodles."

Of course I know what he's going to say, I don't know why he can say this emotion so naturally that I feel ashamed to think about it, in this public place.

I brought over the noodles for both of them, and Xiao Yuan went to get the spoon and chopsticks in a tacit understanding. Neither of us spoke for a while, we just ate the noodles quietly.

I quickly finished my bowl, and when I looked up, Xiao Yuan had already finished eating, and he was smiling at me with his chin in his right hand. I thought that Xiao Yuan was smiling and watching me eat like this, and I felt inexplicably uncomfortable. Sorry, I'm such a bad eater...

I coughed dryly and said to him, "It's over, let's go."

Xiao Yuan walked in front of me, and from my angle, I could just see a corner of the envelope protruding from the outer pocket of Xiao Yuan's backpack.From my point of view, that girl looks pretty good. I looked at Xiao Yuan's side face again. My cousin is very handsome. To be honest, this type is very popular among girls. His facial features are sharp and angular. Clear, thin lips, eyelashes look very long from the side, like a small fan casting fan-shaped shadows.I suddenly understood that girl's mood very well, and even a boy like me couldn't help but want to look at it a few more times... No!What kind of logic is this? Fortunately, I am still a science student... But if I imagine Xiao Yuan standing with that girl, I suddenly feel a little uncomfortable, probably because I feel that my cousin deserves better... What is this kind of mood that seems to be the father watching the child getting married? I sighed heavily.

Looking at the exposed corner of the envelope, I felt a little itchy in my heart. I really wanted to open the envelope and have a look, to see what kind of affectionate words the girl used to express her love... Thinking of this, my heart is full of tears. A fit of discomfort.

So I heard myself asking, "You just said it wasn't what I thought, so what happened to this letter?"

Xiao Yuan turned his head and stared at me all the time, as if he wanted to see all my emotions in his eyes, "Do you care?"

"I'll just ask what's the matter, if there's anything you want to hide from me." I said quite dissatisfied.

Xiao Yuan suddenly laughed softly: "Brother, are you jealous?"

I felt my face burn immediately, and I quickly retorted: "I'm jealous? Whose jealousy is it? I took the wrong medicine to eat that girl's jealousy?"

Xiao Yuan laughed for a while, and then said as if he was talking about someone else: "Anyway, it's not a love letter for me."

I felt that there was something in his words, and I didn't think about it at the time, and felt relieved.

However, when I was with Xiao Yuan, I found that I would always become different from my usual self, probably everyone would become strange with such a cousin.