Alien Office

A recent piece of news that has excited a few people on Earth is that the business of Galaxy Express has finally expanded to the developing planet Earth.

After hearing the news, Ji Feiyun patted Qin Que on the shoulder in relief: "Congratulations, the gossip you can watch will expand from the whole earth to the whole galaxy in the future. This is really exciting news."

Qin Que unfolded the electronic newspaper expressionlessly and began to read it. It is naturally impossible for Galaxy Express to allow hard-working postmen to deliver newspapers to customers all over the universe (if the speed of spaceships currently used by civilians is used, it will take 30 years to travel from the headquarters of Galaxy Express to the earth. ), but in fact, even yesterday's newspapers, people on Earth are unwilling to look back, they like the latest and fastest gossip.

For this reason, Galaxy Express had to find another way—for example, using an electronic newspaper template, and every day the headquarters transmits information to various space jump transfer stations, and then these transfer stations send the information to the receiving end. The time of receipt can be compressed within 24 hours. The only trouble is that "natural problems" such as interstellar turbulence often cause customers to stare at a blank newspaper.Oh, and, you might get a newspaper with completely unintelligible characters in absolutely no language on this planet, then you're in luck, the hard-working postmen don't care A little innocuous mistake, I'm afraid they sent you a newspaper for another planet.

You said you can complain?Great, your complaint information disappeared into the vast universe due to interstellar turbulence, I'm sorry we didn't receive your complaint, you can try again.

"Yesterday's news: Thousand Crows stole the bed of the boss of the galaxy's terrorist organization and sold it to the president through insiders." Qin Que read the text in the newspaper, "I really don't understand what is worth stealing from a nude figure and a big bed."

Crazy Yang was drinking soy milk, and casually said: "This is revenge, why do I feel weird."

"Aren't they really flirting openly?" Liang Rui asked.

Ji Feiyun shrugged helplessly: "Has Thousand Crows been carrying out this kind of activity of sending letters from wild geese all the time? I'm beginning to be glad that my second year Nissan didn't join this group of postmen, otherwise he would have gone crazy long ago. False advertisements kill people, What kind of smuggling group, they are obviously delivering the courier on Valentine's Day."

Qin Que was silent for a long time, and asked with a strange expression: "... Is there anyone on this bed?"

Crazy Yang coughed hard, offering all the soy milk in his mouth to Ji Feiyun who was sitting opposite him, Ji Feiyun rolled his eyes at the ceiling: "What a sharp complaint."

Tucao is back to Tucao, work still needs to be done, Ji Feiyun has been busy for three consecutive days to monitor a family of Tuotuoer aliens who have newly arrived on Earth and behave suspiciously.

This foot doesn't touch the ground... for a reason.

He disguised himself as a chandelier and hung himself in the Tuotuoer star's home. Every time the Tuotuoer star curiously gesticulated and pressed the switch on the earth's lights, he felt extremely painful, because he had to electrify himself to shine, in order to understand Under the supervision of Liang Rui, he had to swallow a dozen bulbs for the structure of the electric light. He had to figure out the various styles and various light emitting principles.

His recent work status is like this: every morning after going to work, he turns into a mouse and sneaks into the home of the Tuotuoer star, and then turns into a gecko and climbs on the chandelier of his home, and then eats this gorgeous crystal chandelier——During Be careful of the sudden intrusion of the Tuo Tuer star. After eating the chandelier, he can start to deform. The matrix is ​​twisted into various substances, and then the wires are connected and he hangs himself on the ceiling-OK.

Although he can eat inorganic substances, he really doesn't like the texture of glass and wires. They are neither like noodles nor crystal sugar, and they taste weird.

Before going home every day, he would separate part of the matrix and transform it into a chandelier, then hang it on the ceiling, and continue to transform back into a gecko and climb out the door.Continue to eat the chandelier the next day.

"Honey, I think the chandelier in our house is different every day." A female Tuotuoer pointed to the chandelier and said to her partner.

"Perhaps the Earth's lighting tools deform," her partner replied.

"But the wall lamp in our house has never changed."

"Well, because the crystal chandelier is expensive, so it comes with a deformation function? It must be like this."

"My dear, you are so clever."

"Hahaha, of course."

Ji Feiyun couldn't roll his eyes because he maintained the shape of the chandelier, so he had to complain in his heart unwillingly. It was really hard to be a light bulb with electricity and light in front of a pair of gluey couples. He had to remind himself not to remember the shape of the chandelier tomorrow.

The female Tuotuoer star began to experiment with the switch again. She was very interested in the chandelier turning on and off for a while. She once forced him to power on a hundred times a day. Although he would not feel pain, the feeling of using himself as a conductor It was difficult for Ji Feiyun, who once thought he was a human being, to accept it.

This is a boring task.

After a week-long investigation of the Tuotuoers, Ji Feiyun finally finished his trip to the chandeliers, and the truth about the suspicious behavior of the Tuotuoers is...they are invisible, so they often enter a room for a period of time Disappeared, and then suddenly appeared in the kitchen or bathroom, or the chandelier switch crackled on and off, and then the clucking laughter of a female Tuotuoer star suddenly sounded in the empty and flickering room—hey , enough of you, the neighbor next door has moved away!

After returning home at night, Ji Feiyun complained to Qin Que about his work while eating. Qin Que picked up a dumpling and stuffed his mouth.Ji Feiyun slammed his mouth and glanced at Qin Que maliciously: "comeon, baby, shouldn't you give me a French kiss at this time?"

The fish balls that were happily rolling in the boiling hot pot one second were stuffed into Ji Feiyun's mouth the next.

Ji Feiyun chewed it with relish: "My own meat is more flavorful."

Qin Que has already finished hypnotizing himself, this stuff is not human flesh, this stuff is fish balls.

At bedtime in the evening, Ji Feiyun expressed his desire to use the main body to try to roll the sheets (without success once), Qin Que skillfully dragged him into the nutrition tank where the human clone was placed, completed the brainwave switching, and then connected the external The nutrient tank of the circulatory system was opened, and Ji Feiyun rubbed the nutrient solution all over his body and sighed: "I'm really not used to the human body. The biggest use of this clone is to do some evening exercise. It costs a lot of money to maintain it. Why……"

Qin Que said with a dark face, "I'll go."

Smiling, Ji Feiyun stretched out his hand from the bathtub and patted him on the shoulder: "You're so dizzy."

Qin Que immediately showed him on the spot what it means to be blinded by sex.

After the incident, the two went back to bed to sleep. Ji Feiyun's overindulgent host stuffed it back into the nutrition tank, and then happily climbed onto the bed with his body and winked at Qin Que: "Honey, do you want to fight another three hundred rounds?"

Qin Que didn't argue with him, he grabbed his shoulders and pulled up the quilt: "Sleep."

Sleeping with a mimic creature in dream sleep is a very dangerous thing. That night Qin Que was awakened by the texture of the bed's greasy hands. He was not surprised to find a huge swordfish lying on the other half of the bed. It was two meters long, and the overly long tail was sticking out of the bed. Qin Que rubbed his eyes, turned over and continued to sleep.When he woke up again, he found that the person next to his pillow had turned into a werewolf, snoring. Qin Que pushed him, and the werewolf murmured in his sleep, and stopped snoring. Qin Que turned over and continued to sleep. up.When he woke up at dawn, he found a fully armed robot lying beside him. Qin Que calmly got out of bed, washed his face and brushed his teeth, and then asked when waking Ji Feiyun, "Would you like preserved egg and lean meat porridge or engine oil for breakfast?"

The robot's eyes opened and it made a beep, and the mechanical voice replied: "Porridge."

Qin Que raised his eyebrows: "The dream last night must be very interesting."

Ji Feiyun looked at his simulacrum, and transformed himself back into a human from metal: "Obviously yes, I dreamed that a group of swordfish were fighting for territory, and then the werewolves cast a net to catch the swordfish and roast them, and finally the silicon base The stars invaded the earth, I was carrying a bucket of water to save the world, and then I woke up."

"I'm so glad you haven't had time to turn yourself into a puddle of water, or you'll have to change the sheets." Qin Que said leisurely.

Ji Feiyun shrugged: "Your bed service is just in time."

"It's a wake-up call."

"It's just a harmless word preference, anyway, you understand what I mean." Ji Feiyun spread his hands and went to find a toothbrush.

Qin Que sighed. He used to think that he would wake up in the morning light with his lover in his arms, exchange a gentle and warm good morning kiss, wash up and have breakfast together, but the reality is so cruel that he has to face each other often in the morning light. The person next to the pillow is unrecognizable, often unable to find a place to put his mouth, sometimes it is a huge squid, sometimes it is a strange-shaped starfish, and sometimes it is an ugly and vicious mermaid - I really shouldn't have watched it with him the night before The underwater world.

The most horrifying time was when Qin Que woke up and found a nuclear warhead lying in front of him. His head froze for a long time, struggling between escaping from the earth and waking up Ji Feiyun.

This may be the most dangerous creature on earth.

After washing up, Ji Feiyun changed his clothes and came out of the bathroom, scratched his uncombed hair and flipped through the newspaper. When Qin Que came out from the kitchen with a bowl of porridge, Ji Feiyun was frowning and studying the title carefully.

"Honey, the price of edamame has been increasing recently, do I need to pretend to be a vegetable farmer and carry edamame to get some tickets to subsidize the family?" Ji Feiyun asked seriously.

"...No need." It's better not to do prohibited things.

Ji Feiyun shook his head regretfully, picked up the porridge and started to eat breakfast: "Actually, I have always wanted to smuggle things like ginger and mung beans, and sell garlic to vampire hunters, what a wonderful business."

The sunlight penetrating through the window exudes a warm and gentle atmosphere. Looking at Ji Feiyun, Qin Que suddenly felt a gentle and warm feeling in his heart.

The most dangerous creature on earth is in front of him, he may not be the best, but he is the only one.