for love

After finally protruding his head from the turtle shell of the protective body, in the words of that day, the whole person retracted again.Xie Zhishu's face lost all smiles, and became clumsy and dull again.

The more you can't understand what he looks like, the more you can't understand him, Xie Jiashu occasionally regrets it and tells himself that it's all Xie Zhishu's fault.

He clearly discriminated against him as a homosexual despite having reached that point with himself, what right did he have to show that expression.

At the same time that I felt chills towards Xie Zhishu, I also began to loathe myself for the feeling that I cared so much about him, as if he insisted on admitting his homosexuality, but in fact, so what if he didn't admit it, so what if he rejected it? !

What does Xie Jiashu want to do, is Xie Jiashu gay, what does it have to do with him? !

Gradually, he didn't want to talk to Xie Zhishu anymore, that guy actually avoided him deliberately, and the two hardly saw each other anymore.On the surface, he was indifferent, but Xie Jiashu was still angry in his heart.Obviously, he usually looks like he is the biggest and obeys him in everything, but this time he doesn't give in at all, not even a word of apology. Xie Zhishu takes him for something!

The more I thought about it, the more chilling I became, and I secretly vowed that if he didn't give in, I would never talk to him again.Then slowly, he never met Xie Zhishu again.

As naive as a child, Xie Jiashu has always been such a person, and he didn't realize that his stubbornness like a baby actually came from caring.

Everything is just sad when the person he likes disapproves, but he thinks it's just anger.

As for Xie Zhishu, he was always in fear and hesitation.

Xie Jiashu's words that day really hurt him, but occasionally he would have messy thoughts like "Jiashu is actually gay like me", or "Will it be accepted if I confess to him?"

But whenever I think of his vicious eyes, I think of his sentence "If you don't see you clean and fun, you can do whatever you want, even if all the men in the world are dead, I don't bother to look at you anymore One glance", the feeling of self-loathing in my heart became more and more intense.

He is really too cheap. After being insulted like that, he still has expectations for him. It is really... There is no other word to describe it except "cheap".

I knew it was impossible between them, but even when I was scolded, I felt that Family Tree didn't hate me that much, but I had already said that, so I couldn't deceive myself anymore.

Xie Jiashu never regarded him as a human being, he was just... just a toy to play with.

Then you can throw it away if you don't like it, it's as simple as that, it's easy for a person like him to get rid of him cleanly, and with his character, he won't bother to fight for anything.

In the end, his love is just self-defeating.

Not daring to see Xie Jiashu again, he would secretly go out every day and come back late, and the life that was not valued and had a very low sense of existence came back, and he slowly adapted to the life he was used to long ago.

In this family, he has never said much.In Xie Jiashu's heart, he is just a toy that is not fun.

Xie Zhishu is actually... nothing.

The existence of Xie Family Tree doesn't make much sense either.

He thought that the cold war between them would continue like this, but God still didn't give him a chance to breathe.

After reading for a few hours at school and looking at the inferior watch on my wrist, it was past ten o'clock, so I packed my things and went home.

When the bus passed near He Yi's bar, I suddenly wanted to have a drink.Xie Zhishu has never indulged himself so much before, counting the last time he came with Jiashu and the others, this is his second visit to the bar.

I ordered a glass of cheap wine in front of the bar, looked around cautiously while drinking, and inadvertently a figure came into my sight.

It's Xie Jiashu.

I was leaning against a man in a dark corner and didn't know what to do. After a while, the two walked through the crowd towards this side.Xie Zhishu shuddered and turned around abruptly, spilling wine all over his body.

"Sir, are you all right?"

"No...thank you, thank you..."

There was no time to feel sorry for the wasted wine, Xie Zhishu took the paper towel handed over by the waiter, lowered his head to cover up and wiped the wet hem of his clothes, but he was peeping at Xie Jiashu from the corner of his eyes.

The man next to him is Xia Rongcheng.

The way those two people stood together reminded Xie Zhishu of the prince.Really, just like a noble prince, but he is the poor who needs to look up to them, the contrast is too strong, whether it is clothing or temperament, he is not from the same country as them.

In the past few days, I still think that maybe Xie Jiashu will accept his confession, but when I really see him standing with others, I find that even if he likes men, Xie Jiashu will not fall in love with someone like him.

He once thought that only the best girls are worthy of him.Even if it's a man, it has to be someone like Xia Hongcheng.

Regardless of status or appearance, he is too good to talk about. A person like Xia Yicheng, Xie Zhishu, will never be able to catch up.

Self-deprecatingly raised the corners of his mouth and smiled, followed the two people upstairs uncontrollably.

Watching the two people enter the room from the corner, Xie Zhishu felt his heart tremble with the slight sound of the door closing.

Before they enter the door...there is a kiss.He has bad eyes but wears glasses, how can he see wrong...

He quietly walked out of the room door as if masochistic, squatted against the wall with his knees in his arms, buried his head low, and sat motionless on the floor.

In the corridor of the special room specially reserved, no other sounds could be heard at all, and he could distinguish what the slight but clear sound was after a while of silence.

Just like the voice he made under Xie Jiashu, he was very familiar with it, but what he heard now was Xie Jiashu's voice, and... Xia Hongcheng's dull panting.

The clothes that smelled of alcohol had been washed away by the tears, leaving only a salty taste. I don't know how long it took, when the legs were numb, the door was opened.

Xie Zhishu raised his head in a daze, looking at Xie Jiashu with distorted expression and Xia Rongcheng standing beside him with a little surprise.

He thought he smiled, but he knew he was crying.

But... what position does he have to cry, Xie Jiashu is just his younger brother, didn't he hug him a few times just for fun, he has no control over who he is with, why is he so sad...