even if I don't go

?The life of a divine surgeon is as busy as ever.Surgery-record-consultation-surgery-record, from [-]:[-] a.m. to [-]:[-] p.m., endless.

Bed Eight's condition suddenly worsened, but there was still a long queue for MRI appointments.The little girl in the second bed finally recovered and was discharged from the hospital. Her parents said a lot of words in gratitude. The old man in the VIP ward was still in a deep coma after the intracranial aneurysm clipping operation. His son who was in the fur business threw a large stack of RMB on her desk.A large group of people gathered in the opposite consultation room, and they were arguing about something.

Yan Zipei, who had just finished the operation and wrote the record, didn't want to care about anything, didn't want to think about anything.But just when she had a little leisure and calmed down by herself, the girl involuntarily appeared in her mind.

She has always been thankful that she disobeyed her mother and followed her heart.Yan Zipei, who has been set up with the rules and regulations of her life path since she was a child, really took a lot of courage (of course, at that time, she could not predict that she would do more "rebellious" things later), and then filled in the medical school behind her mother's back.Otherwise, it would be impossible for her to meet the girl in "Neurophysiology" who forgot to bring her book over and over again.

It was a day that couldn't be more ordinary in the midsummer of my sophomore year, scorching sun, noisy cicadas, and the central air conditioner that happened to be broken.The end of the term was approaching, and there were too many people in the classroom. The smell of the boys' sweat after exercising made Yan Zipei frown.Although she is recognized as a natural refrigerator, there are still a few places around her that are intentionally vacated.

The man walked in amidst such a commotion.

She was dressed very coolly, with a white sleeveless chiffon shirt, dark blue denim hot pants, and the appropriate embellishments on her wrists and a refreshing smile. The hot air came with a pleasant fragrance.She greeted the boys and girls warmly, with elegant and cheerful steps.

The boys stood up one after another and asked her to sit down, but she politely refused one by one, walked straight to Yan Zipei's side, sat down calmly, looked directly into Yan Zipei's eyes with a smile on her face.

Oh, she has eyes as clear as amber.

Yan Zipei suddenly felt that the gaze on her was too long.Quietly withdrawing his gaze, he refocused on the book.

"Student, I forgot my book. I'm going to class and I don't have time to get it. Can I share one with you?" She spoke sincerely and fluently, as if she had rehearsed it thousands of times.Her voice is neither too soft nor too waxy, but also full of girl's unique softness.

"Hey—Student Ning, I have this, I have this, you have as many copies as you want." The male students in the front row responded quickly and enthusiastically, but Miss Ning still kept her eyes on.

There are stars and seas in her eyes, and the expression of innocent pleading makes people unable to refuse...

"Boss, you are the only one who can sit here in a daze so calmly." Wang Erxiao rushed into the consulting room with first-hand news from the front line, "You don't know how arrogant those people outside are."

Yan Zipei said nothing.

"The old lady in his family was dying. After all, the cost of the ICU for one day was too high. Dr. Li kindly persuaded them to go back to their hometown. Instead, they yelled that Dr. Li was irresponsible, or they looked down on their countrymen. Aunts and aunts are all around there." Wang Erxiao was filled with indignation, but Yan Zipei remained calm.

"Tell me if there is any reason. Why is it so difficult to be a doctor to save lives and heal the wounded these days? Prescribe expensive medicine, and people will say that you are making money; persuade you to transfer to another hospital, and people will say that you are not responsible; You will be reported; if you don't accept it? The patient's family will block you with snot and tears..."

How could Yan Zipei not understand this?One operation after another, one report after another, consultations day after day, unreasonable medical troubles again and again, and one fragile and helpless life after another.This profession endows her with unlimited mission and glory, but also puts anxiety and pressure on her shoulders from time to time.However, compared to a night of insomnia, a cup of bitterness, and fingers that stop on the dial key again and again, what is it?

"Good eloquence." Doctor Yan commented, got up and walked outside.

"Hey, boss, don't join in the fun at this time, be careful!"

Of course, Yan Zipei didn't have such a leisurely mood, she just wanted to get out of the small and dreary space of the consulting room before the next operation started, and escape from her sweet and ruthless memories.

The air in the corridor was bleak in late autumn, Yan Zipei tightened his white coat tightly.

There are children playing ball not far away, laughing and running.What a wonderful, carefree age.With an exclamation, the ball flew straight in her direction, barely hitting her foot.Yan Zipei picked it up, walked towards the restless children, and returned the ball to the leading little boy.

"Thank you sister, you are so beautiful." Probably worried about her accusation, the boy opened his mouth first, his little face flushed.

Very smart kid.Oh, his eyes, those eyes shining with childlike innocence.

Yan Zipei has always been a good student in the eyes of the professor.Naturally, her surroundings became the areas that the professor focused on.So when the professor discovered that a young student was not listening to the class but was staring at his favorite student, Miss Ning was not surprised.

That should be a difficult problem, and it is easy for Yan Zipei, and Ning, who has forgotten his books, may need a little help.Of course, the provider will not be her.

I saw Ning got up under the reminder of the boy in front of me winking and calling in a low voice, and asked the professor to repeat the question she didn't hear a word, and then thought about it calmly for two or three seconds.

"The administration of ghrelin in the CA3 region of the hippocampus can improve the spatial learning and memory ability of adult rats in the Morris water maze, and ghrelin induces the expression of the immediate early gene c-fos and NMDAR1, R2B in multiple brain regions..."

Unexpectedly, this classmate Ning kept a secret.Clear thinking and appropriate language can be seen from the surprised and joyful expression of the professor.

She was a smart girl, and she thought so at the time.

Yan Zipei was sobered up by the cold wind, and smiled at his sentimentality today and went back to prepare for the next operation.As soon as I stepped into the department, I was surrounded by reporters and cameras...

In the evening, when Ning Siyin browsed the city's news as usual, he saw Doctor Yan's cold and tired face on the TV screen.

"Patients are refused medical treatment, and doctors have a bad attitude"

Yan Zipei in the camera didn't say a word, and there was indeed a hint of impatience in his expression.She pursed her lips tightly, with a sharp light in her black eyes, and she still couldn't get rid of the reporters' continuous questions.Finally, several male doctors intervened and opened a passage for Yan Zipei, and she left in a hurry.

Ning Siyin breathed a sigh of relief for some reason, and felt distressed in the next second.How many years have passed, and after being immersed in society for so long, she is still so tolerant and inarticulate.

Yan Zipei on the other side returned to his mother's place for dinner as usual on Friday.

One of Yan's parents is in politics and the other is in business.The combination of politics and business has brought both families to a higher level, and this marriage without emotion has indeed brewed a tragedy.When Yan Zipei was five years old, the conflict between his parents broke out and they separated. Yan's mother worried that Yan Zipei would be affected by this and develop into a domineering child, so she treated her even more severely.

Since then, Yan Zipei has lived under the inviolable pressure of his mother.Dependence and nostalgia, awe and obedience to her mother have become the main theme of her life.

Indeed, Yan Zipei grew up according to the standard template set by Yan's mother, calm and resolute, keeping a proper distance from strangers, and accepting all willingness and displeasure with a mask.It was not easy to be rebellious once and was caught. In the following years, Yan's mother usually started with sentences like this: "I didn't interfere afterwards when you filled out the volunteer behind my back. Can't you satisfy my request now? ?”

Having said that, Yan Zipei parked the car and entered his small villa.In the villa, only the living room and kitchen are lit, and the sound of various data from the financial channel echoes over and over again. My mother is sitting on the sofa, and the housekeeper is working in the kitchen. It is inevitable that it is a little deserted.

A trace of guilt rose in Yan Zipei's heart.

"I'm back." Yan's mother's eyebrows and eyes were not angry and majestic, and she didn't show any softness even when facing her daughter. No matter how well-maintained her face was, the years of hard work had added a lot of gray hair to her.

The Yan family's dining table was very dull, and the housekeeping aunt didn't dare to vent her anger on one side, regretting why she didn't stay in the small kitchen to feed and clothe herself.

"Today's news, please explain."

"It's nothing, it's a colleague's fault."

"Hey.. I said that you are not so stupid to make trouble for yourself. Heh... I will contact the newspaper later, and you will not be in the newspaper tomorrow, otherwise your father will definitely call again to ask me why I didn't discipline well you."

"Ah."

"Come to a dinner party with me tomorrow."

"... "

"I don't ask you to take over the company, but do you have to consider marrying yourself out? Do you want to spend the rest of your life with your mother?"

"... "

Yan's mother regarded her as the default, so she stopped talking.

Maybe it's time for her to marry herself off, so that she won't be thinking about it.The leaves outside the window rustled, the cool wind swept into the room with a damp smell, and the downpour came not long after, and the torrential sound hit Yan Zipei's heart.

Plop, plop, plop...

Another day has passed.