old man in town

☆, 73. The road to Shu is difficult, but it is difficult to be liked by girls

Single bed, double sleep, happy night, rebirth many times.Before the first ray of sunlight passed through the window in the morning, they each returned to their own real world with good memories.

In the afternoon, Uncle Zhan's daughter Zhan Wen came home.This girl lived in the city, and now she looks more and more protruding.An orange short-sleeve paired with denim shorts. Although there are dark marks that southerners cannot escape, a pair of bright eyes, a tall nose bridge, and a handsome face give people a healthy, beautiful, summer-like youthful look. vitality.

Zhan Wen was very happy to see Li Xiaomo coming to the house. He entered the living room, ignored his father, and was the first to greet Li Xiaomo.After that, no matter where Li Xiaomo was, this girl's gaze was like a spotlight, she precisely found Li Xiaomo, and you gently hit him.

Li Xiaomo helped Uncle Zhan wash the ducks in the store, and Zhan Hong also ran over to help.Li Xiaomo stared at her with wide eyes in surprise.Because this is rare in normal times.Zhan Hong doesn't like to take care of these things at home.Do not intervene in the business, and will not offer to help.In Uncle Zhan's words, as long as the money is paid enough, her daughter basically doesn't have to go home.Before, Li Xiaomo had received messages that Zhan Wen liked.However, it's a pity that I am an insulator to girls by nature, especially after falling in love with Uncle Zhan, there is almost no room for women in Li Xiaomo's emotional world.Li Xiaomo instinctively wanted to resist, but he was afraid of hurting Zhan Hong, after all, he was the daughter of the man he loved the most.

I was making dinner and found that there was no rice at home.Uncle Zhan wanted to go out to buy, but Li Xiaomo looked at the sweat from Uncle Zhan's hard work and felt sorry for Uncle Zhan, so he volunteered.In the world of two people who love each other, even a tiny grass seed will be nourished by love and become a lush tree.No, just as Li Xiaomo was about to leave, Uncle Zhan gave Li Xiaomo his car keys and asked Li Xiaomo to drive.The residual heat from a day of sun exposure was still powerful, and Uncle Zhan was reluctant to let Li Xiaomo be roasted.Uncle Zhan knew that Li Xiaomo already had a driver's license, so he didn't want him to walk.Unexpectedly, this key caused Zhan Wen and Zhan Hu to jump for joy.They both want to join.This made Uncle Zhan feel incredible.Zhan Hu has been daydreaming about driving, he already knew it, but why is Zhan Wen booing here.When he asked, Zhan Wen said that he wanted to go to the supermarket to buy some girls' supplies.Uncle Zhan couldn't keep asking after hearing that.Uncle Zhan waved his hand, trying to stop them both.But the wishes of the two were so strong that they couldn't listen to them at all.Jiang is still old and hot, so Uncle Zhan resorted to his trump card and said that only one person would be allowed to go, and the other would stay at home to help, and asked the two to discuss it themselves. What is the system.It turns out that this is the legendary, under the banner of democracy, the implementation of dictatorship.Li Xiaomo watched Zhile from the side.

After a discussion, a pair of siblings finally decided on rock-scissors, and it turned out that Zhan Wen won.Although Zhan Hu was very unconvinced, but she was his sister after all, a little man, so he was too embarrassed to argue.Now Li Xiaomo is troubled.Although he has a driver's license, his driving skills are average.Moreover, since Li Chenfu was injured in a car accident, He Chunli seemed to have left a psychological shadow and did not allow the two men in the family to drive.But since Uncle Zhan's family supported him, he could only bite the bullet and go to the battlefield.

As a result, this road was really stumbling.During the short drive, he drove in the wrong direction once, turned off the engine twice, and stopped abruptly three times. The air-conditioning was blowing in the car, but Li Xiaomo was sweating profusely while driving.It was all because, beside him, there was a pair of eyes staring at him affectionately.As a result, Li Xiaomo's body was stiff, and he couldn't concentrate when looking directly at him.It was as if there were thousands of caterpillars crawling on his back along the way.One word, tired.If it weren't for the lack of cars in rural areas, there would definitely be problems.

☆, 74. Have you thought about your future?

Jane Wen is back.That night, Li Xiaomo thought that Uncle Zhan would not come to his room.He wanted to fall asleep as soon as possible, but he couldn't fall asleep because of tossing and turning.His mind was full of bloody images of himself being crushed by Uncle Zhan the night before yesterday.He closed his eyes tightly, trying to drown his thoughts in darkness.But the spirit is like a spring, the more it wants to sink.The rebound is also stronger.He clenched his hands tightly, and the palms were finally wet with a layer of sweat.As a result, the whole body, like the vegetables in the frying spoon, was constantly tumbling under the double torment of the heart and fire, and it was cooked from the inside to the outside.Finally, he gave up resistance.It was Uncle Zhan's room that tempted him.

Li Xiaomo didn't turn on the light, barefoot, just about to open the door lightly.After thinking about it, I should send a text message to ask if Uncle Zhan is asleep.Uncle Zhan must have worked hard all day. "Did you sleep, Uncle?" A text message was sent, and there was an immediate reply: I didn't sleep, I miss you.In the faint light of the mobile phone, Li Xiaomo's heart was full of joy, and he was in full bloom. "I want to find you in your room, can I/" Uncle Zhan texted and said: "Okay, walk lightly."

In the darkness, Li Xiaomo regarded himself as a cat, put his hands on the ground, and almost crawled forward.Do your best to keep the noise to a minimum.This kind of crawling was very tiring, coupled with nervousness, he was sweating after a while.After finally arriving at the door of Uncle Zhan's room, he lightly opened the door with his head, and with a creak, Li Xiaomo was so frightened that he quickly got up and went in to close the door.Shut fear out.

Uncle Zhan lay on the bed and turned sideways, but did not get out of bed.Li Xiaomo walked to the bed, and was immediately pulled over by Uncle Zhan, hugging him tightly.

……

Uncle Zhan suddenly remembered something, and said a word in Li Xiaomo's ear, Li Xiaomo immediately lost the mood to taste it, and the salty taste instantly turned into bitter.It turned out that even Uncle Zhan could tell that his daughter Zhan Wen liked Li Xiaomo.

"Xiao Mo, I don't want to ask you how you plan to deal with your relationship with my daughter. You need to make your own decisions about the affairs of young people. I just want to ask you, what are your plans for your future life?"

Li Xiaomo couldn't see Uncle Zhan, so he could only look for his breath and raised his head.He didn't know how to answer this question.Although Li Xiaomo knew that he didn't like women, he didn't want to marry a woman in the future.But what about him and Uncle Zhan.He never seriously considered it.Can they keep this relationship going?Confidence is there, but how to implement it, the future is long, but there is no direction at the moment.

Uncle Zhan saw that Li Xiaomo was silent, so he patted Li Xiaomo on the shoulder softly and said: "Actually, Xiaomo, uncle still hopes that you can get married in the future. The relationship we had before can't last long. Wait for you to try it in the future." When it comes to the sweetness of being with a woman, you will understand."

"Uncle, what do you think of our relationship before?"

Uncle Zhan hugged Li Xiaomo tightly, and continued to whisper in his ear: "Xiao Mo, now, you are my lover, my friend, and my son." Hearing these words, Li Xiaomo burst into tears After coming down, he never thought that he had such an important position in Uncle Zhan's heart.Because I always thought that was a luxury, so I never dared to imagine it.Now it is so real.But is he ready for this deep friendship?

Uncle Zhan will definitely not leave the town. He still has a pair of parents waiting for him in a big city. What should he do?

☆, 75. You leave your hometown, but it’s hard to leave this mess

Speechless is the best lingering.I thought, indulge in it, take a sleepy sleep, and then take advantage of the dark sky, after the country rooster crows to remind me, I take advantage of the night to escape back to my room.

But at three o'clock in the morning, Li Xiaomo was woken up by the continuous cell phone ringtones in the next room, as strong as an immortal Xiaoqiang.According to Li Xiaomo's usual drowsy demeanor, if he was in his room, he would definitely not be able to read it all, so he would press it off.And at this moment, he is in Uncle Zhan's room. If he doesn't rush over in time and quarrel with Uncle Zhan's son and daughter, it will be troublesome.Li Xiaomo bid farewell to Uncle Zhan who was awakened by his own noise, and then went back to his room on the same road.When I got back to my room, I was sweating profusely.This time, Li Xiaomo was not tired, but guilty.It turns out that the sound insulation effect of this room is so poor, it seems that the next time we spend time together with Uncle Zhan, we must try our best to restrain ourselves and reduce the noise.

Li Xiaomo picked up the phone and found that it was He Chunli.He hesitated for a moment, but took it anyway.On the phone, He Chunli sadly told Li Xiaomo the sad news that Li Chenfu's spine that was injured last time was sick again, and he was re-admitted to the hospital. The condition is quite serious.This news made Li Xiaomo's sweat seep more quickly on his forehead, instantly converging into rivers.He Chunli didn't know that Li Xiaomo was not at school, she had already booked for Li Xiaomo, today's plane ticket to Hefei.Li Xiaomo nervously asked when it was, because he was afraid that he would not be able to catch up, but he still had to lower his voice.When he heard that it was nine o'clock in the morning, he burst into anxious tears.He dared not tell He Chunli that he was in a small town.This ticket is like a high jumping pole, and he has to use all his strength to cross it.Otherwise, neither my own conscience nor my parents will forgive me.Li Chenfu's old injury relapsed this time. Although his mother didn't blame him on the phone, it must have something to do with his behavior.Li Xiaomo felt that it was too naive, he thought he was unrestrained, and left his own life difficulties to his parents to bear.Then stubbornly turned around and ran away from home.You can put everything behind you.Li Xiaomo knew he was wrong, and now he really wanted to promise his mother.But reason told him that although the town is more than half an hour away from the Xiamen high-speed rail, there are very few trains, and there must be no suitable trains to catch the nine o'clock plane.But Li Xiaomo couldn't refuse, a simple affirmative answer at this moment was a great comfort to the helpless He Chunli.In the end, Li Xiaomo promised He Chunli that he would go back as scheduled.After hanging up the phone, he could only hope for Uncle Zhan's help.

Although Li Xiaomo was very anxious, he still stood on tiptoe and entered Uncle Zhan's room.He turned on the light and shook Uncle Zhan awake.Uncle Zhan rubbed his eyes, and suddenly found that Li Xiaomo was looking at him helplessly with tears all over his face.He sat up all of a sudden.

"Xiao Mo, what's wrong?"

"Uncle, my dad's previous injury has recurred and has been admitted to the hospital. My mother called and said it was very serious. Let me go home quickly. She helped me book a plane ticket at nine o'clock this morning. Can you Can't bother to drive me to the airport, or I'm sure I won't be able to make it."

While listening, Uncle Zhan stretched out his hand distressedly to help Li Xiaomo wipe away his tears.He agreed without saying a word.While getting dressed, he blamed Li Xiaomo for being out of touch and saying he was troublesome.In fact, Li Xiaomo loves Uncle Zhan. Uncle Zhan works hard all day and has to take care of his children and himself.

After Li Xiaomo packed up and saluted, Uncle Zhan was already waiting for him outside the door.The two walked downstairs gently. Uncle Zhan sent a text message to his daughter, and then he drove Li Xiaomo in the dark, bypassing the winding country roads, leaving the small town, taking the expressway, and heading straight to Xiamen Airport.

Li Xiaomo sat on the passenger seat, weeping nonstop.Fastened the seat belt, but his thin body kept shaking.Uncle Zhan could only comfort him many times.Now that the person has been admitted to the hospital, the doctor will definitely find a way. If it doesn't work, he can go to big cities such as Beijing and Shanghai. Now that the medical technology is advanced, don't worry too much.In fact, Uncle Zhan didn't know that Li Xiaomo's heart was full of self-blame.This home, which had finally recovered its warmth, was now torn to pieces by myself.Li Xiaomo is a strong person. When Li Chenfu got into a car accident, he didn't act too flustered. That's because he had love in his heart to support him.But today, his strong heart was suddenly crushed by self-blame.

It was another torturous journey, but luckily Uncle Zhan was by his side.At the airport, Uncle Zhan bravely hugged Li Xiaomo, this hug gave Li Xiaomo endless strength.After bidding farewell to Uncle Zhan, Li Xiaomo went to the bathroom at the airport and washed his face with cold water to calm himself down.Now that everything has happened, no matter how frightened you are, you still have to face it with strength.

After getting off the plane, Li Xiaomo was about to call and ask which hospital He Chunli was in.He Chunli's call came first, very punctually.It turned out that He Chunli was already waiting for him outside the airport.What surprised Li Xiaomo was that He Chunli looked very calm this time, but she was the one who was nervous.Did she deliberately hide her inner sadness in order not to worry herself?

He Chunli didn't take Li Xiaomo to the hospital directly, but said to take him home to put his luggage first, and then go to the hospital.As soon as he opened the door, Li Xiaomo was surprised to find that Li Chenfu was sitting in the living room, his father's face was full of embarrassment.

Li Xiaomo immediately understood that this was a scam directed by his mother and starring his father.He flew into a rage and asked them why they lied to him like this.He Chunli gave a more powerful answer, which immediately blew him apart.He Chunli lied to him to come back this time because she wanted to arrange a blind date for herself, and it was tonight.

☆, 76. A play within a play, it turns out that you are also an acting school

"Okay, I'll go, isn't it just a blind date? I'll go." Li Xiaomo put down his luggage, and took a sip of the cold Biluochun on the table.

When Li Chenfu and He Chunli heard Li Xiaomo's decisive reply, they almost dropped their jaws in surprise.They understand Li Xiaomo's character, and know that he is the kind of person who will endure many things silently and will not explode violently, but the cold war for a month is a certainty.The couple, now overwhelmed by their son's dramatic transformation.Until now, they still choose not to believe that Li Xiaomo is a comrade.How could such distant words that can only be heard by chance in movies, in the news, or in the sarcasm of friends, appear in their lives, and it is two people at a time.They were more wishful thinking, and blamed Li Xiaomo's confession on Xue Lin's influence.In their memory, the son has never talked about a girlfriend.The husband and wife pushed the responsibility onto themselves.They think it's all because they didn't manage their family well before.A pair of parents who are on the verge of divorce can easily disappoint their children in love or marriage.Since Li Xiaomo has never dated girls, how can he know that he doesn't like girls.When they first met, the sweetness of love, and now the mutual support through wind and rain, became the greatest confidence of the two middle-aged people.They want to arrange a blind date for their son and help him.

Li Xiaomo's approval gave them a glimmer of hope, and they were immediately overjoyed.Li Xiaomo only heard that He Chunli couldn't wait to pick up the phone, and the blind date was arranged for that night.

In the evening, He Chunli drove her family to the dining club in the resort area of ​​the city.There were two bottles of Wuliangye and two boxes of Cordyceps sinensis in the trunk.Before coming here, Li Xiaomo had already known the situation from his parents.The girl who is about to go on a blind date with him is very beautiful.He Chunli turned on the phone and showed Li Xiaomo the photo, Li Xiaomo nodded in praise.The girl's parents are teachers in a high school.She graduated from Normal University this year, and with the help of her parents, she will soon become an English teacher in a prestigious junior high school in Hefei.Such a scholarly family should meet the requirements of Li Chenfu and He Chunli.He Chunli's friend was in the middle of the match, and the other party readily agreed after learning about their family background and Li Xiaomo's education.

After being enthusiastically guided by the waiter, they came to the private room booked in advance.Li Xiaomo opened the window, wanting to release He Chunli's nagging all the way, all kinds of exhortations that were already playing in his ears.Outside the window is a blue lake, which blends with the moonlight in the sky and the shadows of trees on the ground under the touch of night.It reminded Li Xiaomo of a small town far away.

While in a daze, He Chunli's friend brought the teacher's family.The parents seem to be attracted by the gorgeous decoration of this private room, they tsk-tsk praised, forgetting to search for Li Xiaomo in the crowd.It was a girl standing behind them, with big eyes, looking at Li Xiaomo in a panic, then lowered her head, as if looking for something on the ground.The girl was wearing a green dress, with black hair reaching her waist and fair skin, especially her big eyes, which He Chunli's matchmaker friend praised for a long time at the dinner table.He Chunli and Li Chenfu warmly entertained the guests and arranged two seats so that Li Xiaomo and the girl could be next to each other.

With the boasting of both parents, the advantages of the two families and their children have been magnified to the extreme.It was like colorful bubbles blowing up in the sun, but you could tell they admired each other.At this time, there was a sudden piercing noise of blowing one's nose, which broke the bubble immediately.Everyone's eyes flustered, they searched on the table one after another, and finally the focus fell on Li Xiaomo.Li Xiaomo was holding a napkin and covering his nose.Like a big star who is used to seeing the spotlight, he is calm and composed.He took off the napkin, folded it, and covered his nose. He worked hard and played the "music" just now again.Then crumpled up the paper and threw it beside the plate.He could hear the sound of his parents swallowing saliva.Li Chenfu who was sitting on the side just touched Li Xiaomo with his knee.So after a brief silence, Li Chenfu stood up and called on everyone to clink glasses together, and the hustle and bustle resumed.Just put down the glass.Before everyone picked up their chopsticks, Li Xiaomo kept putting a plate of Jinhua ham into his bowl like a hungry ghost.He couldn't stop muttering, "This is my favorite."

He Chunli couldn't stand it any longer, she reminded Li Xiaomo that she should get food for the girl sitting next to him first.But Li Xiaomo just lowered his head and cared about eating.

At this moment, Li Chenfu and He Chunli already understood that Li Xiaomo didn't come on a blind date today, he just came to mess things up.

His abnormal behavior made the faces of the parents turn black.They remembered the incident when Li Xiaomo drank himself heavily on the wine table.So I dare not criticize too much.Suddenly, there were a few more pieces of ham on Li Xiaomo's plate, and it was the girl next to him who picked them up for him.A pair of big eyes, said with a smile: "It seems that you are hungry, you should eat more."

Li Xiaomo hesitated for a while, but didn't say thank you.

☆, 77. Can all problems be solved by speaking out?

This scene was funny, cramped, I was tired, and the people around me were full of doubts.Although girls use their own elegance, like a cup of green tea, to resolve a little spicy.But until he got home, Li Xiaomo didn't remember the girl's name.This may have something to do with He Chunli's nagging in his ears along the way.

Back home, Li Xiaomo locked himself in the room without giving any explanation to his parents.In fact, Li Xiaomo's heart is very conflicted. On the one hand, he regrets his impulsive childishness today, and on the other hand, he is also annoyed by his parents' oppressive rescue.He plunged into the bed, wrapped himself tightly in the quilt, completely ignoring the hasty knock on the door.It wasn't until I was sweating profusely that I realized that I forgot to turn on the air conditioner.So I got up again, found the remote control and pressed it, and then fell down again. After this tossing, I became a little sleepy, and my tense nerves gradually relaxed, and my heart no longer hurt, so I gradually fell asleep.

……

When it was noon, Li Xiaomo felt like he was about to pass out because he had slept for so long that he lacked oxygen, until he was woken up by knocking on the door.With a diving leap, he turned over and jumped to open the door, completely forgetting that there was a thick wall between himself and his parents.When I opened the door and saw He Chunli's yellow complexion, it was like a revelation. The feeling of comfort just now was all a dream.This is the time of war, and the smoke has not cleared.His face was also clouded, and he couldn't help but let out a long sigh.

"Brush your teeth, wash your face, and change your clothes. There is a guest waiting for you in the living room." He Chunli looked at Li Xiaomo's sloppy appearance, and she would have laughed happily in normal times, but today, with a blank face, she turned around and went downstairs.Li Xiaomo beat his chest and stamped his feet nervously after hearing this passage.Could it be another blind date?God, now my parents don't even go to work, and they are completely at home staring at themselves.With such a strong firepower, he was a little overwhelmed.Li Xiaomo deliberately didn't brush his teeth or wash his face, and went downstairs wearing short sleeves that still had oil stains from last night's dinner.

When he came to the living room, he found a middle-aged man in a suit and leather shoes sitting in the living room.The middle-aged man should be in his 50s, not fat but a bit muscular, wearing a pair of black-rimmed glasses, and his hair is neatly parted at a slant. There is a thinkpad on the table, and he is gesturing to Li Chenfu and talking about something.The middle-aged man is slightly taller than Li Chenfu.Li Chenfu was also wearing a light green shirt and trousers.Although I don't know what the middle-aged man came here for, it definitely has nothing to do with the blind date.The two delicate men were sitting together, Li Xiaomo felt ashamed when he saw this scene.Driven by his self-esteem, he ran upstairs slowly, finished washing up quickly, changed into a T-shirt and denim shorts, and went downstairs.

After being introduced by his parents, Li Xiaomo was dumbfounded. It turned out that this was the best psychiatrist in the city that his parents had invited for him.Li Xiaomo suddenly felt that his parents were far away from him. At this moment, he actually became a "patient" in the eyes of his parents.Suddenly, the resistance in my heart came out again.Just about to turn around and leave.

"Xiao Mo, it's meaningless for you to escape like this. All problems need to be solved by sitting down and having a good talk." Hearing the thick baritone voice coming from behind, Li Xiaomo suddenly felt A sense of grievance.He doesn't want to be separated from his parents again.It's not easy to be happy now.This is what he and his parents worked hard for, how could he give up so easily.Li Xiaomo turned around and sat on the sofa, the expression on his face was much calmer than before.

The psychiatrist referred Li Chenfu and He Chunli and said: "In our traditional Chinese family, it is very difficult for all family members to express their feelings to each other, so I would like to ask the two of you to go upstairs to avoid it first, and I will chat with Xiaomo. A while. Then I invite the two of you to come down, is that okay?" He Chunli seemed unwilling to leave, but was forced by Li Chenfu to go upstairs.

The psychiatrist turned into the host and poured a cup of green tea for Li Xiaomo.The fragrance of tea permeated the living room, which made him feel much refreshed.

"Xiaomo, your father and I are very good friends, so this time, you don't have to treat me as a doctor. You can treat me as an elder, just call me Uncle Zhang, or you can treat me as an ordinary doctor of yours. It doesn't matter, my friend. Let's not discuss anything from pathology, but from past experience, and find the answers to all the questions today. Please believe that I have no inclinations and remain neutral. And I have my professional Keep it a secret for you, and I will not tell your parents about the information you don’t want to disclose to the public. You have to understand that as a bystander, I will help you communicate with your parents, and the efficiency of this communication will be much higher.” When the middle-aged man spoke, he kept staring at Li Xiaomo, his words were very sincere.

After a long time, Li Xiaomo finally spit out a few words: "Uncle Wang, do you think you can solve the problem by speaking out?"

"At least say it so that your parents can understand you better. After all, you are their child. The bond between you cannot be resolved by escaping."

Li Xiaomo thought about it, and felt that what he said made sense.

☆, 78. Mind, presence, affirmation and acceptance

"Xiao Mo, homosexuality is a common phenomenon in nature. Scientists have found the same behavior among other animals such as gorillas and penguins. This phenomenon has existed since ancient times. In ancient times, people called this behavior Short-sleeved or Longyang, in modern times, we call it Broken Back because of a very famous movie or because of the influence of Cantonese, we jokingly call it Jiji. But you know, any person is a combination of physiology and psychology. Although now Regarding the causes of homosexuality, there are different opinions in the academic circles, but everyone agrees that there are two types of homosexuality, congenital and acquired. This corresponds to physiology and psychology. From a physiological point of view, some homosexuality is congenital, and they It is natural to show intimacy with the same sex, and have sexual fantasies about the same sex you like. The other part is formed after a series of psychological transformations. After a series of psychological transformations, you have a good impression of the same sex. These two reasons will also overlap. Formed the day after tomorrow The reason is more complicated than congenital. For example, some gay men show female characteristics, or lesbians show masculine characteristics. This is actually due to the impact of psychological changes. Gender differences between men and women, except for some body structures In addition to differences in strength, most of them are social attributes. For example, women walk lightly, wear long hair, wear skirts, and like jewelry and make-up, while men are the opposite. These manifestations are all social attributes. And our common heterosexual homosexuality, mostly Some of the characteristics of heterosexuality are social. This shows that these characteristics are mutated and accepted in a series of acquired influences. From my point of view, if it is congenital, I think it is not The way to correct it can only go with the flow. But if it is acquired and has a good impression on girls at the same time, it can be guided through a series of guides and finally make a choice. This choice is more about social considerations, because people After all, they are social animals." Just now the middle-aged man said that he would not conduct research from pathology, but this easy-to-understand but professional analysis still convinced Li Xiaomo.Although it is difficult to conceal a trace of rejection of homosexuality between words.But for Li Xiaomo, other parts of the information are more attractive to him.

After taking a sip of tea, the middle-aged man continued: "So Xiao Mo, no matter whether you are willing to open up your heart to me today, you need to carefully consider my analysis just now, and at the same time examine yourself, your homosexuality, Is it innate or acquired. It is a difficult process for everyone to understand their own heart. But if you want to gain your own affirmation and acceptance, and even the understanding of others, you must seriously talk to your own heart and discover The real existence within oneself.”

Li Xiaomo was silent for a long time, and finally said: "Actually, I struggled for a long time before admitting that I was gay. Later, I affirmed and accepted myself. But I didn't seriously explore why I did as you suggested. Being gay, where the hell am I coming from?"

"Yes, Xiaomo. It's very good that you can accept your current state. Maybe it doesn't matter to you why you are gay. But this question, to your parents , everyone around you is indeed very necessary. This is a key to gain their approval." The middle-aged man clasped his hands together in front of his chest, his sincere attitude constantly infected Li Xiaomo.

"Thinking about it now, I think I should be born. When I was very young, when I read manga, I was very interested in the middle-aged male characters in it. The more mature and stronger I like them. For example, "Naruto Asma in "Transformers" and Optimus Prime in "Transformers". The same is true when watching TV series and movies. Before I understand what sex is, I just purely fantasize and look forward to being with them Together. As for what we can do together, I actually don’t know. Even if it’s that simple, it’s enough to make me lie in bed at night and close my eyes but can’t fall asleep for a long time. After school, elementary school, junior high school, high school, university, all the way , I have never talked about a girlfriend. I don’t have a particularly good girl friend. Because when I see a girl, I have a feeling of retreating. Then I met a man I like. From the beginning until now, I have never I feel anything unnatural. I love this person with all my heart and soul." Li Xiaomo said so much all at once, with a shy look on his face.

Out of respect for Li Xiaomo's privacy, the middle-aged man didn't ask who this man was.Just ask Li Xiaomo to tell me if it is a middle-aged man.Li Xiaomo nodded in agreement.After thinking about it, the middle-aged man said something that moved Li Xiaomo even more: "Xiaomo, I am very happy for you. You can recognize and accept yourself. The most terrible thing in this world is that you can't see where you are going. He Fang. As long as you can recognize your own path, you will exude endless strength and wisdom to deal with the predicament in front of you. Today’s conversation will be suspended for a while. I will sort out and analyze the information you told me, and you can help me Go upstairs and ask your parents. I want to talk to them."

It ended like this, Li Xiaomo thought at first that today would be a fierce battle.With surprise, he went upstairs to invite his parents.Eyes crossed, the three of them quickly avoided.Li Xiaomo waited in his room.Although Li Xiaomo gained a lot of strength from the exchange just now, it seems that these strengths are not enough for Li Xiaomo to have the courage to deal with the conflict with his parents.All that can be done now is to wait quietly.

☆, 79. Give you freedom, because I love you so much

Li Xiaomo held back his heart not to eavesdrop.Anxiously waiting in the room stomping.In the end, he was still unable to resist, opened the door, and walked gently towards the middle of the corridor.

He could only hear the thick voice of the middle-aged man passing through the thick wall and into his ear.The content of the conversation between them seemed to have a magnetic force, making Li Xiaomo's ears firmly attached to the wall.

"Old Li, Chun Li, through my observation and preliminary understanding, Xiao Mo should be born gay."

Li Chenfu asked very suspiciously: "Old Zhang, it should be impossible, we raised him so much, we never thought he looked like a girl, and we never raised him as a girl."

"Old Li, your understanding is a bit one-sided. You can't simply equate homosexuality with femininity. Feminized boys are not necessarily gay. The reasons for homosexuality are very complicated, and effeminate boys are mostly due to It is caused by the low secretion of male hormones, and of course it does not rule out some acquired psychological identification. But in short, homosexuality is more complicated than feminization, and the way of expression is also very complicated. Feminine men also fall in love, marry and have children, and homosexuality also has Many men are very masculine, as the saying goes, they are very manly."

"Then how do you know that he is born gay?" Li Chenfu was still full of doubts.

"In fact, when people are very young, as their sexual organs mature, they will gradually have sexual fantasies and sexual associations. The object of Li Xiaomo's sexual fantasies when he was very young was men."

Li Chenfu still didn't believe it, so he continued to ask: "Old Zhang, do you think it's possible that our husband and wife had a bad relationship before, which left a psychological shadow on Xiaomo, and then made him feel no sense of sustenance, so he subconsciously I want to find a man to rely on."

"You said it must be part of the reason, but this can only partially explain why Xiao Mo likes middle-aged men, but it doesn't correspond to the same-sex object in his sexual fantasies when he was very young."

He Chunli cried out in surprise, as if she was afraid that Li Xiaomo would hear, she lowered her voice: "What, what, he likes middle-aged men. How could this happen? The situation is getting more and more complicated now." Her voice was full of despair.

"Both, please calm down. Drink some water." After a while, the middle-aged man's voice sounded again. "If it is innate, then there is no way to correct it. But as the two said, the current situation is indeed very complicated, because the reasons for it are also very complicated. Currently, research on homosexuality is still in the process of development, and there is still a long way to go. There is no particularly authoritative theory to explain this phenomenon.