i fell in love with a straight guy

Today, my brother made an exception and was promoted to director. He became the youngest surgical director in their hospital.

He is happy and so am I.The two of us celebrated at home, and both drank a lot.

Today's wine is really good, the more you drink, the happier you will be.

With the help of alcohol, I happily said what I had been holding back for a long time.

I told him, brother, I like you, I love you, I want to be with you.

"Silly boy, how could you be gay! Are you drunk?"

He didn't take it to heart at all, and was still teasing me, "Brother loves you too, just like my own son!"

I held back the beating of a rumbling drum in my heart, and repeated it firmly.

Brother, I'm not drunk, I like men, I like you.

My brother's hand holding the wine glass paused slightly, and soon returned to normal:

He said, Yu'er, we are good brothers who are closer than relatives, this matter is not something to be joked about.

I looked at him very sincerely.I'm not drunk, I'm not joking, and I'm not lying to you.Brother, I really love you, I love you so much... I like you, not the kind of liking for a friend, but the kind of liking for you as a boyfriend...

After I finished speaking, I sneaked a look at the expression on his face, but there was no expression on his face, no shock or joy, not even disgust.

He seemed very confused. It took a long time before he took a sip of his wine and said to me lightly, "You're drunk."

Yes, I'm drunk, and all I say are drunk words, which don't count.

The two of us tacitly did not mention it again.

Then I was really drunk, I closed my eyes mistyly, and my body fell towards him.

My brother subconsciously brought his shoulders closer.But he didn't know what suddenly came to his mind, he stood stiffly on the spot, and then backed away.

I fell on the sofa, the sofa is very soft, but my heart hurts.

I didn't dare to open my eyes, I just grabbed his arm tightly, I didn't want him to go.

Normally, he would definitely be soft-hearted, babbling, coaxing me to sleep like a child, and then carrying me to the bed in the bedroom.

But today, he didn't respond.He just took my hand away, gentle but firm.Then I went to the bedroom, brought a blanket and covered me gently, and tucked in the corner of the quilt.

"I'm sorry." I heard him whisper.

I lay on the sofa, holding back tears desperately.

After a long time, I heard the sound of the door opening and closing, so I quickly sat up and called him.

He went out and never came back.

I'm actually quite sad.

I thought I liked him and confessed to him, he would be very happy.So on a great day, I wanted to give him an icing on the cake, but unexpectedly, it seemed to cause him a lot of trouble.

It is my fault.My life was planned from the very beginning, and I shouldn't let my own temper cause trouble to others.

Alcohol is really not a good thing, I won't drink it in the future.

The next day, taking advantage of his promotion, he moved into the new house assigned by the hospital to outstanding employees.

The new house is very good, I went to see it.Not too big, but simple and clean.

My brother sure loves it.

I helped him move the house, and watched him pack up his belongings one by one, erasing little by little the traces of our years of living together.

I helped him move things until the moving company's car honked its horn downstairs, and neither of us said a word.

My brother is obviously a chatterbox, and his broken mouth feels uncomfortable if he doesn't speak for 2 minutes.

The two of us just packed our things on our own, without looking at each other or communicating.For the first time, I felt like I was going to part ways with my brother.

Before leaving, he stood at the porch, took a last look at our home with nostalgia, and handed me the house key,

I didn't answer.

Keep it as a souvenir.

My brother stretched out his hand in the air for a long time, seeing that I didn't intend to take it, he seemed a little embarrassed.

Finally he produced another bunch of keys, removed one and handed it to me.

"The key to my new home, Xiao Yu, come and play with me if you have nothing to do."

I took it and watched his figure disappear at the end of the stairs little by little.

I want to stop him, I want to keep him, I haven't learned to take care of myself, two people can take care of each other when living together, I was just joking last night, don't take it seriously, there is formaldehyde in the new home, don't worry about moving there...

There are so many excuses I can make, as long as I yell, I believe my brother will come back, after all he loves me so much.

But I didn't shout out, and he didn't look back.

I lit a cigarette and took a sharp puff.My brother is a doctor, he doesn't smoke, he hates the smell of nicotine.

In the past few years in the shopping malls, I have contracted the bad habit of smoking.

But he didn't like it, so I never smoked it at home.

Now I can smoke freely at home.No one will control me anymore.

I took a deep breath, the choking smoke made me cough up tears.

Brother, you always told me before that the smoke that has been inhaled circulates in the lungs and then exhaled, there will always be some dust and impurities deposited in the body, which will never be expelled.

Brother, I have been with you day and night for so many years, why can't I find any trace of my existence in your heart.