God knows

I finally made out her expression in the dark, and there was never a moment when Phoenix was more human.

Sorry, pain, sadness, so many emotions mixed on that beautiful face, it hurts to watch.

I tried to open my eyes blurred with tears, trying to ask the final answer.

"You don't have to go." I said, with a faint insistence in my voice, "Since you understand that our destiny is destined to be together, why do you still treat me like this?"

"no future."

"Shit!"

I screamed, and Phoenix covered my mouth with his hand. After struggling for a while, I weakened tiredly, and finally calmed down.

"Phoenix, you know emotions and love best. I don't want to hear you tell me that my love affair with supernatural things has no results. You know what fate is like."

"I know."

She spoke softly, almost soothingly, but I heard a hint of resignation in that tone.

"I know your stubbornness, Ann, and I know your hopes..."

"...To be honest, I also hope that I can squander your years shamelessly. Even though I never really existed, I will still be the most important one in your life."

Phoenix's tone was so natural and straightforward, it made me feel so lost in listening.I stared at her, looking at those eyes, without the slightest hint of a joke.

"I love you too, Ann."

"Why do you say this in such a destructive tone?"

"I don't mind being squandered."

"It's impossible to love God and humans."

Phoenix lowered his head and said, "From the moment I fell in love with you, I heard your emotions most clearly. I was influenced by you, and I am also happy to be influenced by you. I thought that might not mean anything, but... "

"...But, Ann, everything has meaning, if I can't do what a god of love should do, then I lose the need to exist."

I think of the woman who is close to death by the side of the field, and the feeling that Phoenix missed hearing; I think of the day she fell directly to the ground from the sixth floor, and I seldom see her fly again; I think of Phoenix becoming lethargic one day. Start shortening too...

"Wings," I asked. "Wings just happen to be invisible to me?"

Phoenix smiled wryly and shook his head.

"Gone, Ann, and the future may be more than just wings."

I looked at Phoenix in horror. It turned out that the tone of resignation meant this. It turned out that there was indeed a reason for her apologetic expression.

"Then...then leave me alone, go far away."

I said anxiously.

"Let's go now before it's too late! What if you really disappear?"

I'd rather not have you than not have you at all.

"I also thought that leaving you would solve the problem, but the situation has not improved. I'm afraid... If I leave now, the future will cease to exist..." Phoenix lowered his head and told me calmly.

"…God knows."

I almost cried again when I heard it.

"Sorry," she whispered, touching my face lightly. "At least I'm lucky to see you at the end."

This is just too cruel.

Even up to this moment, Phoenix's apology was not for his own fault.

How does fate want to play tricks on us?

"You...you take back your apology." I said, seeing Phoenix look at me confused, "It's not your fault! You didn't do anything wrong, there is no need to apologize."

"But I almost killed you after all, didn't I?" She said with a wry smile, put her arms around me, and pressed her palms lightly on the wound on my back, "Fortunately, the accuracy has dropped recently. ..."

Phoenix had a look on her face that I had never seen before, like stinging sadness.

"...Anyway, I'm in a hurry, I'm so stupid." Phoenix sighed softly.

"It's okay, I don't want to apologize."

"I'd rather...I'd rather you spend the rest of your time saying something truly sincere."

But Phoenix didn't say anything after all.

She just bowed her head and kissed me.

I forgot the taste and touch of Phoenix's lips, I just remembered that after I dared to kiss her, I never dared to think about it.

Unexpectedly, this familiar cold touch is so missed. She bit me lightly, as if the suppressed enthusiasm was no longer going to be buried, and Phoenix was biting almost domineeringly. I could taste her desperateness, so I couldn't hold it back. Own out of control.

Phoenix and I both choose to ignore the taste of tears on each other's lips, as if no one wants to admit it at this moment, and one night will last as long as forever.

"Why?" she asked in a low voice.

"what why?"

I reached out and pulled her into my arms like every second was worthless.

"That is, why do we have to have emotions? If we are to work like machines, why should we?"

She asked me a series of questions for the first time, and I stared blankly at her downward gaze, only her eyelids and long, golden eyelashes were visible.

"Ann, I'm sure this must be a design flaw, but if Eros could have love..."

I can't possibly know, can I?

God knows.

Phoenix seemed to realize that these series of questions did not belong to my cognition, so he smiled lightly, and came to a conclusion lightly, as if perfunctory himself.

"Stupid, let Eros have love, and then miss a human's life."

Thinking of her Phoenix's tone of recognition, she would rather that I never owned it. If it were me, I don't want the people who stay behind to have to bear so much.

"You said, Phoenix, you never existed."

I tried to hold back a smile, I said.

But she clearly understood my emotions when I said this, and knew how much I didn't believe what I said.

Phoenix opened her eyes and looked at me. In the darkness, her sky-blue eyes were shining with a light that I couldn't see clearly.

"Ann, I never..."

"...It has always existed only because of you."

She leaned back and let me hold her in my arms.

I stretched out my hand to feel the smooth and cold skin around her waist, her soft and slender body almost made people feel fragile, and her lips dropped delicate kisses on my neck, the tingling feeling made me want to escape, but also Want to ask for more.

I was still thinking about it when Phoenix lowered his head and looked away.

That piece of blue is enough to be my sky in my small world.